#plus im trying to branch out again

[euri-matsuri]

made a twitter account (unfortunately) so if youre interested in seeing me over there (i dont know how many of you actually use it) AND maybe seeing actual nsfw . actual suggestive stuff will probably get posted over there vs. over here

so heres my main vs. the nuca/nsfw side acc

[rafeandonlyrafe]

deliveries

words: 1.2k

warnings: ex!rafe, reconciliation, kinda sugar daddy rafe but he just likes taking care of his girl mhm iktr

“can i say no?” you sigh.

“say no? did you not place this delivery?” the man raises his eyebrows.

“i didn't. my- my ex did.”

“well, i have to deliver it, ma’am, but i don't care what you do with it afterwards. give it to your friends or throw it out.” the man sets the bags of food at your doorstep, snapping a picture before walking off.

you can't blame him, plus it's probably a situation he's never encountered before.

you sigh as you pick up the bags, carrying them into the kitchen counter. packages, deliveries and letters have been showing up on your doorstep for two weeks, ever since you broke up with rafe.

you're sick of it at this point. as you go through the food, picking out something to eat for dinner (you're not just gonna let it go to waste!) you grab your phone and unblock rafes number.

you wonder how long it will take him to realize as you sit at your desk and eat. you're in an apartment complex with pretty tight security, it's the only reason why rafe isn't knocking at your door himself, instead sending whoever he can to get a message to you, while simultaneously making sure you have plenty of food to eat and things to take care of yourself with.

you answer your phone after the first ring. you deleted his contact, but rafes number is forever memorized in your head.

“stop sending me things.” 

“baby, its a relief to hear your voice again.” rafe sighs, sounding genuinely happy, like a weight is suddenly off his chest. “please, let me just talk to you. i miss you so much.”

“no, rafe. we broke up. you need to stop.” 

“why'd you break up with me? what did you tell me princess?” rafe questions. “i wasn't giving you enough attention. now im giving you everything. please, y/n.” he pleads. “im not going to stop.”

you take a deep sigh. you really love rafe, despite your relationship being only six months old when you broke up with him, it was just too much. too much attention from your friends and too much pressure from his family. it pushed your relationship farther apart until rafe barely paid attention to you, receiving constant questions from his dad and friends.

“you have to, rafe. clearly things weren't working out. we tried. we can say that. gave it a fair shot.”

“im not done trying. yes, i let my family and other people get into my head about our relationship, but im done with that bullshit. i want you back.”

“let me think about it, okay?” it's an olive branch. the best thing that you can extend right now.

“okay.” rafe agrees. “how about i call you friday?”

you glance at the calendar hanging over your desk. two days. two days to think. you're not sure it's enough or too much.

“that works… but rafe, stop sending me stuff.”

“i can't, baby.” you can practically see the way he's shaking his head right now. “gotta take care of my girl, even if you don't wanna see me.”

“fine.” you groan. you know there's no talking rafe out of it. “order me some lemonade next time then.”

--

you yawn as you wake up with a big stretch, instinctively reaching over to the other side of the bed. your hand pats the sheets before remembering that you left rafe.

you slide out of bed, heading towards your kitchen to get something for breakfast when a knock on your door interrupts you.

“one second!” you're in pajamas, but they're far too small and tight to answer the door in. you rush back into your bedroom and pull a robe on to cover up.

“hi!” the delivery woman smiles. “y/n?”

“yup.” you nod, stepping to the side. “do you mind just setting it down on the counter?”

the woman places the bags down before saying goodbye and seeing herself out. you sigh and look into the bags, eyes bulging when you see velvet boxes carefully placed inside one of them.

you pull out one of the boxes, gasping when a beautiful diamond necklace is revealed. you continue to open them, realizing rafe bought you jewelry of almost every variety.

“oh, gosh.” you grab a note, opening it to see his handwriting.

it's just what you deserve. i love you and want you back. can't wait to talk to you tomorrow.

rafe

p.s. i paid your rent for the next three months

you grab your phone before even looking in the other bag, dialing rafes number. he picks up almost instantly.

“you know you can't buy my love, right?” 

“im not trying to.” rafe says. “im just trying to take care of you. did you get the breakfast?”

you peek into the other bag, seeing a stack of delicious looking pancakes inside a clear container, as well as some other options.

“yeah, ill eat it in a minute.”

“good.” you can practically hear rafes smile over the phone.

“how about we meet up in person to talk tomorrow instead of on the phone?”

“ill go wherever you want.”

“our first date.” is all you say before hanging up, grabbing the pancakes and container holding scrambled eggs.

--

you're aware you didn't say what time as you pull up to the pier. it's a warm day, sunny with almost no clouds in the sky, but a light breeze gives you the perfect amount of cooling.

you walk down the pier, unable to hold back your smile when you see rafe sitting on the bench where you ate ice cream on your first date after finally agreeing to let him take you out.

rafe watches you carefully as you sit down next to him.

“you're wearing the necklace i got you.” he smiles, seeing the gold chain around your neck.

“i am.” you nod. 

“can i… can i hug you? ive missed you so much baby.”

you nod again, not sure you can find your voice as rafes arms wrap around your body, holding you into his side. you snuggle into his chest, eyes sliding shut. 

“love you so much.” rafe says, pressing kisses to the top of your head. “so much i messed up the first time not trying to be too obsessed. i just didn't want to make you run away, turns out i did the exact opposite and you felt ignored. you know how my dad is…” rafe trails off as you pick your head up to look at him.

“we shouldn't have let others get between us.” you know you're not innocent in it either, contributing just as much to rafe to the tension that had grown between the two of you.

“and we won't let it happen again now that we know.” rafe says, a promising look in his eyes. you swear it looks like he might cry as you nod.

he ducks his head, pressing your lips together in a sweet kiss. you fist your hands in his shirt, keeping him close as you kiss back, having missed his lips on yours more than you'd like to admit.

“does this mean you'll tell security im allowed back in?” rafe laughs gently, cupping your face, his thumb gently stroking over your cheek.

“hmm, i guess.” you giggle.

taglist: @drewstarkeyslut @forstarkey @f4ll-for-you @dilvcv @drudyslut @jjmaybankswifes-blog @rafescokenostril @jjsmarijuana @seeingstarks @angelofcigs @cece45450 @babygorewhore @vanessa-rafesgirl @michelleisheres-blog @outerbankspov @drewstarkeyswifehoe @cutielando @sourkittie @rafeyslove @rafeinterlude @bellbottombaby @deeaardiary @rubixgsworld @wearemadeofstardust0 @leighbronk @starkeysheart @pradabambie @tobesolovelysstuff @alexiskirkland @rafestar @brioffthegrid @juniebugg @magicalyoura @cokepewpsii @mysticallystilinski @luvdella @aerangi @vogueprincess @auryyz @raysmayhem-72 @thestarlithideout @marvelfanfics1recs @rafesgiirl @ditzyzombiesblog @chiaraanatra @tobiaslut @drewsephrry @1aarii1 @bejeweledreverie @winterrrnight

[ashthesalamipiece]

Bakugou x reader fantasy au please im a sucker for fantasy can be whatever you like romantic family fluff ect just have fun with it

also i hope one day you write a full book i just love your writing its so passionate and real plus absolutely hilarious

Lots of lemons~ Rin

You're incredibly kind—thank you so much for those beautiful words. I'm honored that my writing connects with you like that!

I dont know much about the fantasy au so please correct me if I'm wrong

I didnt really get satisfied with my writing on this one so please lmk if you'd like it Rewrite!

Enjoy♡

---

“The Fire in the Forest”

Bakugou Katsuki x Reader | Fantasy AU | Romance + Fluff + Light Angst + Magic

In the village of Eldenridge, nestled between the edge of the Great Forest and the jagged Spine Mountains, they whispered about a sorcerer with fire in his blood and a temper sharp enough to slice steel.

No one dared venture near his tower.

No one… except you.

---

You didn’t mean to fall asleep beneath the old tree. You’d only meant to rest your legs, let the sun warm your cheeks, maybe finish one more page of the herbal compendium Master Toma had lent you. But sleep came anyway.

And when you woke, it was to the heavy scent of ozone and—

Fire.

The tree was aflame, its branches curling into blackened claws. You scrambled back, heart pounding—

And then a voice snapped through the chaos like a blade through parchment.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

You looked up to see him. The Sorcerer of the Ashen Tower.

Platinum-blond hair, wild and wind-tossed. Eyes like molten gold, furious and bright. Cloak flaring behind him like wings of shadowed smoke. His hand was raised, still crackling with heat.

“I—I was just reading—!” you stammered.

He lowered his hand slowly, nostrils flaring as he took in your face. “You’re not from the city.”

“I’m an apprentice herbalist,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady. “I didn’t mean to trespass.”

He grunted. “You’re lucky it was me that found you. The forest doesn’t take kindly to wanderers.”

You tried to believe that sounded more like concern than a threat.

---

The second time you met him, it was raining, and you were lost.

Again.

“You’ve got a damn death wish,” Bakugou growled, yanking you up out of the mud and into his arms like you weighed nothing. He didn’t wait for permission. Just carried you like some grumpy, scowling storm god while lightning split the sky.

“Put me down!” you protested, face hot.

“Not a fuckin’ chance.”

---

By the fourth visit, you were bringing him bread. He glared at it.

“What the hell is this?”

“Olive and rosemary,” you said innocently.

Bakugou made a noise like a scoff—but you caught the way his fingers lingered on the parchment wrapping. The way his fire dimmed a little around you now.

You started visiting on purpose after that.

He never said it, but you knew he waited for you.

---

There were stories, you learned, buried like bones in the village.

That Bakugou had once been a knight. That he’d burned half an army alive to protect a city that exiled him. That his magic was the gift of a dying dragon—and a curse he carried in silence.

He never told you any of it himself.

But sometimes, late at night, when you curled up beside the fire he built with a flick of his fingers, he’d stare into the flames with a look you couldn’t quite name. Like he saw something there you didn’t.

Like he was trying not to remember.

You’d rest your head on his shoulder then. And he’d lean into you, just enough to say:

You’re here. You’re real.

---

One winter, the sickness came.

It swept through Eldenridge like a scythe, and the healers were overwhelmed. You worked until your fingers blistered, gathering roots and brewing draughts—but it wasn’t enough.

And so, in the coldest hour of the night, you ran through the snow to his tower.

Bakugou opened the door before you could knock.

“I need your help,” you gasped, breath fogging.

He didn’t ask questions. He just grabbed his cloak and said, “Lead the way.”

---

They called it a miracle when the sickness broke. You didn’t tell them about the man who spent three nights and days conjuring fire to burn the fever out of every home. Who nearly collapsed after stitching a child’s soul back into their body with raw power.

You just brought him tea. Sat beside him while he glared at the mug like it offended him personally.

“I didn’t do it for them,” he said. “I did it for you.”

You smiled. “I know.”

---

It was spring when he kissed you.

He didn’t ask permission. He just looked at you—really looked, like maybe for the first time—and cupped your face with hands that had shaped flame and fury alike.

And when he kissed you, it was like standing in the heart of a wildfire that chose not to burn.

---

The villagers still talk.

They say the fire-sorcerer has changed.

That he walks through the market now, holding hands with the apprentice herbalist. That he laughs—laughs, can you believe it?—and calls her “Princess” with a snarl so soft it could be mistaken for affection.

They say love tamed the dragon.

But they’re wrong.

Because you didn’t tame him.

He just finally found someone worth burning the world for.

[miridiums-writing]

Hey could you write like a Thranduil x y/n thing? I kinda need it right now.

No Escape

Thranduil x reader fan fic

Imagine : If only you didn’t look so similar to his passed wife, maybe you could have made it out of the elven kingdom with the others.

Authors note : im sorry ive been gone so long, im back now though I promise. Ill set up a new masterlist and we can all forget my old works don’t exist because I hate them all.

The forest was so dark, you and the rest of the company trying to navigate through the winding trails. It was all going fine and well until you all realized you were gong in continuous circles. Seeing the same trees, the same oddly shaped rocks over and over that you all realized something was wrong. “lets just set up camp for now and try again tomorrow.” You insisted, noticing the frustration of the others. “Fine,” Thorin conceded. “We get out of here tomorrow though, we have to keep pushing forwards.”

With that you all settled down for the night, you went off to gather some wood for a fire with Bilbo, unsurprisingly your favourite of the company given how down to earth he was, plus the pure entertainment factor he brought to the group at times due to his cushioned upbringing. “Do you think we actually will get out tomorrow?” Bilbo asked, clearly more worried if that could be the case than he let on. “’course we will, we’ve gotten this far haven’t we?” You reassured, patting the top of Bilbo’s head in hopes of calming his anxiety. “I suppose so.” He mused, adding another stick to the bundle you had already gathered. “Exactly,” You said with a warm smile. “Nothing left to bring us down now except the dragon.” Bilbo seemed to grimace at this. “Don’t remind me” He grumbled. You just laughed lightly. “You’re far too negative, always hope for the best, and prepare for the worst. That’s why you’re here, you little burglar.” “I’m not a burglar.” He reminded. “Well, you’re the best we’ve got, maybe when we’re out of this forest I can help train you how to be stealthy.”

The light banter between the two is quickly cut off by a very loud thump against the forest floor, almost shaking the ground between the pair of you. You immediately dropped the pile of branches to the moss ground, breaking into a sprint back to the others, you could here them in the distance fighting when you’re path was blocked by the biggest spider you’ve ever seen in your life. It was a large black, hairy thing, immediately trying to shoot webs in your direction to catch you. Adrenalin jumped you into first gear, dodging by a hair at the first shot, and bringing your bow and arrow from your back to aim at the spider, aiming right between the eyes and firing the shot. The shot lands. The spider falls, only for three more to appear in its place. This was not going to be easy.

You reach back grabbing another arrow and letting it fly, hitting each spider as they came with pristine accuracy. Even with such accuracy though from years training, it didn’t seem to be enough. The arrows quickly started to dwindle, before running out. Not having enough time between spiders to scavenge for your arrows, leaving you eventually cornered, and empty handed. Though just as one of the spiders went to launch itself at you it got violently thrown backwards by...an elf?

~~~~~

You couldn’t decide whether you preferred the spiders, or this. Getting dragged, cuffed, towards a rathe impressive looking castle. Not that you’d ever say that allowed, in fear of further angering Thorin who already looked like he was plotting the elves deaths in detail, shouting, swearing and struggling as he went. You kept your head down, not sure what was about to happen, but not wanting to anger the elves, especially after they went out of their way to save their lives. Even if it meant they’d ended up getting dragged to the dungeons. You had graciously been given a cell alone. Given you were the only woman in the group it seemed only fair. You got yourself comfy against the wall, listening to the others chat amongst themselves on what to do, waiting for a quiet moment to bring up what felt like the most important thing to worry about. “Where is Bilbo?” You said, cutting through the whispers. The others immediately went silent at that. He wasn’t among them, you hadn’t seen him since before the spiders. “Maybe he’s doing what he does best, burgling the keys.” Baldin grunted. You just hoped he was right.

All talk of escape was cut off by guards coming down, leading Thorin from his cell to meet the king. When the dungeon door closed behind them all of you sighed. If Thorin was angry, which he was, all hope of doing this civilly was going to be immediately snuffed out by his rage. The wait for Thorin to come back was long, and silent. Talk of escape had died completely as you all waited tensely for him to return. And return he did. His eyebrows furrowed in rage, cursing under his breath as he was pushed back into his cell resulting in a loud bang as his body collided with the floor. No words needed to be spoken for them to know it hadn’t gone well. The already depressing reality hit like a train. Unless a miracle happened. This was it.

~~~~~~~

You woke up the next morning to banging against the bars of your cell. You were crumpled against the wall, your back strained from the position you’d slept in. “Get up.” The guard said gruffly, starting to poke you with the sheathed sword to fully wake you up. “Get up!” The demanded again, much more aggressively than previously. You slowly started more your cramped body up off of the floor. The cell door opened and two guards immediately grabbed your arms ad started dragging you out of the dungeon to who knows where. The walk was long and winding, it felt like they were taking you on a confusing route on purpose to make sure you didn’t know the way out. Or maybe the halls really were this confusing, who knows. Either way you eventually arrived at a rather impressive looking door. Large green wooden panels made up the door with large tree roots encasing the doors, twirling around the doors handles.

Someone from the other side opened the doors leading to what seemed to be a throne room, with a tall blonde haired man sat on top, a rather dramatic crown upon his head, adorned with gems and jewels to mimic a berry branch. He watched closely as you were dragged in, forced to kneel down in front of him on the ground. His expression seemed to change from mild annoyance to surprise as you got closer. Now kneeled before him, the man stood, towering over you as he stared down at your face, almost like he didn’t believe it. “Oh, it’s you” He said, relief and sadness laced his voice. His legs seemed to give out under him and kneeled down staring at your face with tears in his eyes. “Oh my dear, how I’ve missed you. I though- I thought you died.” He said, his voice cracking slightly as his hand reached for your cheek, fingertips gently grazing your cheek. You stared at him blankly. Not a flicker of recognition behind your eyes as he acted as if you were supposed to know him. Confusion took over his features at your lack of response. “Calatheil? My blossom, why are you acting like you don’t know me?” Now it was your turn to be confused, “That’s not my name, I’m (Y/N).” You said in response. The man went quiet after that, staring holes into the floor. “But you look like her.” He said, his voice firm, like it was a fact. “That doesn’t mean I am her”

The man went silent again for a moment, anger passing over his face before disappearing. “Of course it does,” He said. “You’ve just forgotten is all.” His words were firm and absolute. “Ill just need to remind you, my poor wife” You looked at him as if he was insane. “But I’m not. I am not your wife, I’m sorry. But I’m not... I wanna go back to my cell now.” The man laughed without humour. “Absolutely not, my wife shouldn’t be around such vermin.” “Do you mean the dwarves?” you asked, going on the defensive, they were your friends, were they odd absolutely, but that didn’t mean you loved them any less. “Of course I do! You’ll be going no where near them ever again. Guards, take her to my room, and do not under any circumstances let her get free!” He ordered, standing up from his crouched position and heading back to his thrown. “And bring me Thorin! I may be inclined to allow his freedom under a condition.” You were once again grabbed by guards and dragged out. “No! I’d rather cells, don’t you dare, I’m not your wife! Let me go!” Your shouts died down as you were dragged further away, thrashing in an attempt of any escape, managing to get one arm free only for more guards to hold you, overpowered once more by the numbers. The struggling silenced to Thranduil as the door shut behind you.

[luffyvace]

✌︎ Sitting in Zoro’s Lap hcs ✌︎

I just felt like doing these<3 I don’t usually do concepts and I’m testing out the waters so they’ll likely be short ;3 also I wanna do more than just relationship hcs bc it’ll be more fun ✌︎

enjoy zoro simps cuz y’all definitely be on my acc 💖

At first he feels it’s kinda pointless

like he’s thinking “why would you wanna sit on my lap?!—sit on a chair or- just- somewhere else!...even the floor or something idk?!!”

but however you somehow convince him to let you, whether that’s bribery (swords or alcohol), sitting on him anyway or schmoozing him over into letting you,

you did it!!

And that’s all that matters :)

he probably got tired of your relentless request and just let you eventually

While you sit on him he’s usually sleeping sitting up, drinking alcohol or just relaxing with his eyes closed

When you sit facing him it’s a little more comfortable for him

he prefers it that way

sometimes you lay your head on his shoulder/chest and fall asleep on him

he’ll scoff either way but he gets a bit annoyed if he was trying to do something that requires getting up

Like training for example

If he wasn’t too busy in the first place then he just scoffs and probably takes a nap himself

if he’s not tired he waits for you to get up

he doesn’t like to stir you from sleep but if it’s important like a ship attack he’s kinda rough about doing so- 😀

bro he basically yanks you up and yells your name

not because he’s trying to be mean 🤷‍♀️

Just the fact that if an attack comes your way you won’t be able to dodge—and protecting someone isn’t his thing when fighting, he always tells you to go hide if your weak

uh anyway 😗

When you sit with your back to his chest its comfy but like don’t be surprised if he picks you up and turns you around (i don’t wanna hear anyone saying they’re too heavy bc you obviously must not have seen the weights he lifts on a daily)

sitting like that’s kinda annoying bc having to crane your neck back and to the side is not fun 😬😀

plus you probably hit his jaw a lot-

Or things like

1) he bites his tongue

2) his teeth hit your head (and it hurts for both of you)

3) he spits his alcohol in your hair (when you hit his jaw with your head)

4) you hit your head on his nose

So yeah this position is less common for you guys

Bonus if your hair is long

then he gets his fingernails stuck to it too :)

he prefers you don’t sit on his lap in public

mostly because he doesn’t like the stares that come with it 💁‍♀️

he just feels awkward

If you once again somehow convince him to let you in public however…..

it’ll be the type where he man spreads and you sit on one leg facing him

that way he has a bit more space to move and one of his arms is free

just in case an attack comes that he needs to block

orrrrrr just for simply drinking alcohol 😋

on the merry/sunny he’s more likely to cave in

especially since it’s just the strawhats

unless they make fun of him or smth (especially robin) then he doesn’t mind as much

plus y’all can have some privacy in the crows nest most likely

ngl he pretty comfy to sit on

unless your really tall or smth he’s prob bigger than you

so it’s not like y’all are uncomfortable or squished

zoro after time skip is low key more comfy because you know that dark green coat he wears?

yeah it like bends to create a little chair when he manspreads

and idk if you know what I’m talking about but those who get it do 💗👍

Does he end up liking it?

yes :)

yes he does. :)

Im trying to branch out and do more concepts because it’s more interesting for me to write, and you to read so why not 😊

Hopefully my zoro stans enjoyed !! <3 ⚔️🗡

[ladybyakuya]

| RACETRACK + SAKURA HARUKA.

+cw. — fem!reader, fluff, love & comfort, realization of love. | ft.tsubaki + bofurin first years.  inspo.

+wc. — 1k 

+syn.—  when the impromptu fashion show at Show Pub Ougi bar turned the trajectory of Sakura’s emotions towards you he could not help but chase it.

+notes. — this is for flufftober ‘fond moments’ event hosted by @spookuna. i sort of am proud of this piece so please give it a shot.  mdni cuz im eighteen plus blog. | redirect to blog navigation.

The evening has just sprouted. Sakura can hear the soft jingle of the door danglers as people start to turn up one by one. This is not his first time at Show Pub Ougi bar he can not seem to remember how many times exactly has it been; maybe Nirei can help. Sitting in a different Green room, more like a Stock room of different kinds of clothes and accessories his mind could not help but drift off to what was happening outside of this room. Besides, he can hear your giggles along with Tsubaki’s and Narita's voices. Why the walls are so thin? Nirei and Suo must be busy patrolling the surrounding streets along with others but he is here, sitting amongst rows of clothes trying to learn to “depend on others.” and “trust others to get the job done.” because he wants to yet keep spiraling now and then thinking about all the what not perilous possibilities out there like a worried mom. Maybe Nirei is just fine, after all, Suo is there with him. They must be having fun eating street foods while he is rotting away with you occupying his brain.

Sakura exhales a strong sigh and lets his eyes fall for a few seconds, finally leaving his seat to look around. While at it, his eyes fall on a pair of red shoes with sticks attached to the heel section. How do people walk wearing this again? He remembers the first time he noticed Tsubaki’s heels it almost scared his wits out thinking how flawlessly he could fight in those. What would it feel like to walk in those? Would those shoes fit him?

“Sakura, you haven’t got changed —?” Your voice trails off as his eyes fall on you while you stand near the entrance of the room. At first, his eyes dilate in surprise and then slowly move downwards till his eyes get stuck on your toes that had the same pair of shoes. He realizes he is staring when you pull the curtain to cover yourself with a “humph” pouting a little but it does little to cover your feet. 

“Yeah! I will change soon.” Sakura glances at the dress that he is supposed to wear which was selected by none other than Tsubaki himself.

“You don’t like the suit?” 

“No, I do. But I was wondering what shoes I’d wear. . .” You look at him with a little surprise in your eyes since he does not get too embarrassed asking you all this. Oh dear! Has no one told this boy yet? You branch out your index finger while your other hand lets go of the curtains saying, “Those. . .heels.” pointing at those sky-red pair of heels.

But as soon as this fact sinks in Sakura his jaw drops and he protests immediately, “But I can’t. . . “

“Why? Everyone else will be wearing it too.” Sakura’s shoulders relax again. He reconsiders. 

“Do I have to walk in those?”

You finally enter the room. “Of course. Walking is compulsory.” with each click of your heels, Sakura’s eyes follow you with rapt attention. “C’mon try it on.” You say extending your hand out, “I’ll help.”

It takes a few seconds for Sakura to put his hand in yours but those few seconds had spiraling thoughts like . . . will he fall? What if he falls and you laugh at him? What if he fails to wear those heels? — but he pushed all those thoughts aside because he did not want to miss the fun anymore. 

Sakura slowly slips one of his feet into the heel, then tries to stand to slip the other. He is shamelessly grabbing your hand while just standing there looking at you and then looking at his feet. He does it a few times before you softly speak not to shock him even though he looks adorable like this. “Try walking Sakura. I’ll keep holding your hand. Don’t worry.”

Even with heels, you are shorter than him and now he is in heels so as he slowly learns how to balance you find it a little challenging to balance his imbalance out. So, you come in front guiding his hand over your shoulders because if you guided them to your waist he would get too embarrassed to continue this. He is making good progress so far. “See! It’s nothing hard. I remember the first time I tried heels.”

“And—?”

“And I fell right on my face ‘cause there was no one to hold my hand. . . ” Sakura notices that by now one of his hands is at the back of your waist and the other is filling the gaps in your fingers as you walk backward while he follows almost reaching the exit of the room. Sakura does not stop but his steps sure become slower but time does not slow down. It never does even if he wanted to make it slower or stop for a while. “ . . . and my first heel was black. My uncle bought me one when Grandma . . . ”  Sakura is barely listening to you. You know that too yet you try to keep talking to keep his attention on to somewhere else. He can only hear his quickening breaths and feel his drumming heartbeats threatening to explode his chest open laced with a faint presence of your voice at the back of his mind.

It is surprising, even to him, how he has not felt embarrassed one bit all this while. Come to think of it, he has been feeling like this around you for a while now; as if he is sitting under a sakura tree looking at the setting sun while his skin feels tingly due to a cool breeze. Is this what it feels like to fall for someone? Like lying on the soft moss-green grass on a ho.t summer day under a tree trying to get used to the sun. 

By now, you are standing outside the room disentangled from him while he is standing inside the room, arms branching towards you as he is glimpsing at you with fascination in his eyes like he is watching the birth of a supernova. . . wait exactly when did all these feelings start to bloom?

[delulujuls]

encore plus près d'tes adversaires | as12

hey, it was a hot minute since i uploaded something here, so enjoy this little comback (hopefully)

im not sure about this, i wrote this just in one attempt so, it might be bad, so if it is, let me just know how bad i did lol

let see if i still remember how to write lmao

summary: reader and ayrton used to be everything - strangers, rivals, at one point even enemies. so how did they went from hating each other to needing one another to breathe? (au, there is no second crash in san marino)

warnings: the fatal events of saturday at imola 1994

pairing: fem!mclaren driver x ayrton senna

It was a warm Saturday afternoon. The last weekend of April was truly springlike; the sun peeked out from behind the clouds more and more often, and a pleasantly warm breeze swayed the branches, where the first green buds had begun to appear like a delicate mist.

They could be perfectly observed from the seventh corner of the Imola circuit, looking more to the left, towards Tamburello. But that was not what first caught the eye. Unfortunately, all attention was focused on the wrecked car of Roland Ratzenberger, which lay in pieces at the Villeneuve corner.

The qualifying session for the San Marino Grand Prix was immediately halted, and the injured driver was swiftly transported to the hospital. However, the crash itself did not bode well—it looked horrific. A grim rumor circulated around the paddock that the Simtek driver had not survived long enough to reach the hospital.

Even though life at the track had to go on—despite the commotion and the sounds of mechanics at work—the only thing truly audible was the hum of machinery. People spoke little to one another, the mechanics worked in deep concentration, and the drivers were lost in their thoughts. Despite the sunny weather, dark clouds loomed over Imola.

A lonely figure sat in front of the Williams garage. In one hand, he held a cigarette; with the other, he repeatedly wiped his reddened eyes.

Ayrton was shaken by the crash. But just as much as he was shocked and saddened, he was also furious. The FIA cared little for driver safety; the concerns raised in meetings, the protests, and the drivers’ fears made little impression on the authorities. Sure, every now and then, for the sake of appearances, some changes were implemented, but not in the amount or manner they should have been. Senna had nearly worn himself out trying to push for better safety measures—how many times had he argued in meetings, walked out, or been asked to leave simply because he could not stand to watch drivers being exposed to such danger? Of course, the Brazilian loved racing, but he also loved life. The thought of dying just because someone somewhere could have tried harder was unacceptable. Speed could kill him, but not human negligence.

"May I?"

Ayrton snapped out of his thoughts at the sound of a voice above him. He looked up and saw a familiar figure in a red McLaren suit, its top half now loosely tied around her waist. The man simply nodded and lowered his gaze again, exhaling a cloud of smoke.

The girl sat down beside him and nervously hugged her arms around herself. She, too, was shaken by the incident—her eyes were swollen and red, her cheeks damp with tears. Out of all the people at the track, out of every place she could have gone, she had chosen Senna. Who would have thought?

Their paths had first crossed in the McLaren garage at Silverstone, where the girl was undergoing evaluation tests to determine whether she was the right person Ron Dennis was looking for to replace Alain Prost.

As it turned out, she was perfect—achieving an incredible lap time in a car she had driven only a handful of times, in the unpredictable British weather, no less. She was a phenomenon that amazed many—but also one that many disliked.

Including Ayrton himself, who, whether he liked it or not, had become her teammate.

Senna wasn’t worried that he was getting someone like Prost—someone as much of a bastard as that damn Frenchman would be hard to surpass. Besides, she was just a girl, a few years younger than him—what threat could she possibly pose to someone who already had a world championship title to his name?

As it turned out, a considerable one.

She didn’t have Prost’s temperament, which could have been a blessing for Senna. If he had to endure a few years battling a female version of that idiot, he would have somehow managed. By the final weeks of his rivalry with Prost at McLaren, they were at the peak of their mutual hatred but also knew each other inside out. This was different. The girl was a mirror of Ayrton himself. And there is nothing worse than tasting your own poison.

Despite her age and limited experience, she was fearless. Every time she held the wheel, she tested the car’s limits. She spent hours with the mechanics, who, after overcoming their initial reluctance and prejudice, saw what she was capable of and dedicated as much time to her as she needed—answering every question, addressing every doubt. She was clever, sharp, quick-witted. She asked a lot, but she listened even more. She wanted to do everything in her power to leave her mark at the top of motorsport. After all, Formula 1 is a woman—it is not called the queen of motorsport for nothing.

As one might guess, Ayrton was livid.

He had expected Ron to bring in someone who would be his wingman, someone to clear the way for his victories and fend off attacks from rivals. But by the fourth race of the season, it was clear—Senna had to fight not only the rest of the field but, above all, his nemesis.

A sword had met another sword, not a reed, as he had hoped. Fire had danced with fire, not water, as many had expected. Their temperaments frequently led to clashes, and at one point, McLaren management even considered getting rid of one of them. The only question was—which one?

Ron Dennis issued an ultimatum to his drivers, and only then did they realize that their rivalry had reached a critical point—one that many thought their feud with Prost could never surpass. They snapped out of it. Competition and rivalry are great, of course—especially for spectators, as they bring excitement and thrill—but from within, from the team’s perspective, it was like corrosive acid. It’s hard to count how many people left McLaren during its golden era. Despite the victories, working under such conditions was unbearable.

The team from Woking had become a mighty serpent—but one that, at some point, had started devouring itself. It had to be stopped.

The McLaren duo decided to cooperate. The beginnings were incredibly difficult, full of arguments, but with each passing week, as they lived from race weekend to race weekend, the drivers grew closer.

The turning point came during the award ceremony of the controversial Australian Grand Prix—the final race of their second season together. The girl hadn’t finished the race due to a collision with Riccardo Patrese, who many believed had been tasked with eliminating her. Williams had sacrificed its driver, hoping that if they couldn’t take the individual title from Senna, they could at least console themselves with the constructors' championship.

Ayrton had invited the girl onto the top step of the podium beside him—showing his disapproval of the politics plaguing F1 but also signaling that their feud was over. To this day, photos can be found capturing the moment when their eyes met almost gently, and their faces—despite the difficult situation—were adorned with smiles. It was said that Ron Dennis personally kept one of these photos in his collection as proof that his team could overcome any conflict.

They continued to race together at McLaren for two more seasons until Senna decided to move to Williams. Despite this move, they remained close. Who would have thought that a rivalry that nearly tore the team apart would ultimately end in… friendship?

Friendship?

Could they really be called friends?

Opinions varied. But one thing was certain—of all the people gathered at Imola that day, the girl had chosen to seek comfort in Ayrton’s presence. And he hadn’t pushed her away. They sat together in silence until, once again, she broke down in tears. Without a word, Ayrton wrapped an arm around her, and she leaned into him, desperately seeking solace.

He held her for a long time, gently stroking her hair. Though he remained lost in his thoughts, she was not indifferent to him. At one point, he even tightened his embrace, pulling her closer. He needed someone, too.

After a while, when she had somewhat calmed down, she quietly apologized, pulling away and wiping her tear-streaked face. Ayrton looked at her, his face mostly expressionless. But then, a slight furrow of concern appeared between his brows as he took her face in his hand and, with a rough thumb, wiped away the lingering tears. The girl met his gaze, surprised by the gesture, but after a moment, she closed her eyes and surrendered to his touch—wanting to feel something, anything, other than the grief tearing her apart.

They sat together in stillness until Sid Watkins came into view. The man wanted to talk to Ayrton, but seeing that he was in company, he hesitated. However, the girl was soon called to the McLaren garage, so the doctor decided to speak with the Brazilian. Ayrton knew the conversation would not be pleasant, that he could not count on the comfort of silence that had been offered to him just moments ago. He pulled out a cigarette and offered the pack to Watkins as well, but the older man declined, taking a seat beside him.

"Is it true that they took him away already dead?" Ayrton asked as he lit his cigarette.

The older man removed his glasses and rubbed his face with his hand. That was all Senna needed. No answer was necessary.

"It was a horrible accident. I've never seen anything like it before."

"He hit a wall of concrete at over three hundred kilometers per hour," Ayrton said, exhaling smoke. "That should never happen."

Watkins put his glasses back on and waved his hand, signaling for Ayrton to give him a cigarette after all. He lit one and set the lighter aside.

"I heard they don’t want to cancel the race," he admitted quietly, as if afraid someone might overhear them.

"I suppose they plan to announce his death only after the race?" Ayrton replied, raising his voice. If someone let him into the FIA office right now, he would unleash hell.

"Let it go, Ayrton."

Senna thought he had misheard. He had the impression that Watkins was his ally, someone who supported his stance that safety in Formula 1 needed to change, and yet here he was telling him to let it go?

"Don’t race tomorrow."

Oh.

The spark of anger quickly faded, and Senna sighed, exhaling smoke and rubbing his face with his hand.

"After all this?" He shook his head. "After weeks of effort, I should now tell Williams that in the third race of the season, they’ll be down a driver?"

"You know this isn’t a trivial situation," the older man exhaled a puff of smoke. "Something terrible has happened. You know that."

Senna bit his lip painfully, not even knowing what to focus on amidst the flood of thoughts tearing through his mind. Watkins saw that he was conflicted. He had a bad feeling about the upcoming race. He hoped he could dissuade Senna from racing the next day.

"Take her to Brazil," he said after a moment, noticing the girl leaving the McLaren garage with Ron Dennis. Ayrton looked up. Their eyes met for a split second.

"You like fishing, don’t you?" Watkins continued, extinguishing his cigarette butt with his shoe. "Fly to Brazil, take a break. Come back for Monaco."

The Brazilian shook his head and buried his face in his hands. Watkins squeezed his arm and stood up, patting him reassuringly on the back.

"Think about it, Ayrton. You’re a human being first, not just a driver."

Senna was one of the last to leave the track. However, he didn’t head to his hotel. After some time, now out of his racing suit and wearing jeans, he knocked on a door he had managed to find with the right help. Silence was his only answer. He waited a moment, and just as he raised his fist to knock again, the door slowly creaked open. Two pairs of eyes met, and before Ayrton could ask if he could come in, the girl wordlessly stepped aside and moved further into the room, signaling that he could enter.

As he closed the door behind him, he noticed her stepping out onto the open balcony. She sat down, smoking a freshly lit cigarette. The ashtray already held a dozen or so stubs.

Senna leaned his elbows on the cold railing and looked out at the city slowly sinking into darkness. Silence wrapped around them again. They didn’t speak, even when the girl stubbed out her cigarette and stood up, moving beside him to gaze ahead. She wanted to say she had a bad feeling, that she didn’t want to race tomorrow. But as she parted her lips, Ayrton spoke first.

"I'm thinking about resigning tomorrow."

She glanced at him from the corner of her eye. A moment later, he did the same.

"Cool off. Get back for Monaco."

Her gaze wandered over his face—his swollen, exhausted eyes, his sunken expression. It seemed to her that in just a few hours, he had aged by years.

"Why don’t you?"

"No one needs a driver who doesn’t race," he replied, turning his eyes away again.

"No one needs a dead driver."

Silence fell once more. She feared she had gone too far—her eyes stung with tears again. She, too, turned away, staring ahead. Ayrton clenched his jaw and lowered his gaze. Would he really be able to clear his mind by tomorrow? To gather his thoughts? Would he be able to drive a good race? Would his foot hesitate over the brake at the Villeneuve corner? How many seconds would he lose to his doubt? Would any of this be worth it?

"Ayrton, I—" "Would you like to fly with me to São Paulo?"

She had wanted to apologize, but he interrupted her. She looked at him uncertainly, as if she hadn’t fully grasped what he was saying.

"What?"

"I want to take you to Brazil. To get away from all of this for a while," he said, shaking his head and burying his face in his hands. He felt pathetic when tears burned under his eyelids, but the feeling quickly faded as he felt her embrace him without a word.

"There’s been too much going on lately, and—" His voice broke, and she only held him tighter. "I think I’m starting to lose myself in all of it."

"I’d fly to the ends of the earth with you, Beco," she whispered, feeling her own tears threaten to spill again.

Ayrton pulled back slightly, cupping her face in his hands. She had never called him that before, but hearing the nickname felt like a soothing balm being spread over him. She placed her hands on his wrists, looking into his eyes.

"You’re not alone in this, okay?" she whispered, her voice trembling. But she couldn’t say anything more because he pressed his lips to hers.

Instinctively, she returned the kiss, not overthinking her actions. And yet… she felt peace. Peace, despite all the chaos and turmoil surrounding them. The person who had once been her chaos was now the only one in whom she could find calm.

The best thing that ever happened to them was each other. The worst kind of blessing, yet the most beautiful curse. Only God knew how many awful things they had said about one another over the years, cursing the day they ever met. But only God also knew that it wasn’t hatred that made their hearts race when someone in a crowd spoke their name.

Before they even realized it, they were lying naked, wrapped in each other's arms. She rested her head on his chest while he stroked her hair, tracing the tips of his fingers gently along her back. The desperate need for closeness in such a difficult moment, the stress—there were plenty of things they could blame for what had happened that evening. But she didn’t push him away when it was over, and Ayrton didn’t gather his things to return to his hotel. They simply lay there, holding onto each other, finding solace in the comfort they could offer one another.

Who would have thought?

That very night, both Ron Dennis and Frank Williams received phone calls informing them that their drivers would not be participating in the upcoming race. The news spread at lightning speed, and by eight o’clock on Sunday morning, not a single driver remained committed to racing at Imola. The action—later declared a protest—sent shockwaves through Formula 1. So much so that later that same day, the authorities convened an emergency safety commission. By Monday morning, track renovations had already begun—starting with the ill-fated Villeneuve corner.

Ayrton stared out of the airplane window, watching the landscape shift below. A storm of worries and doubts raged in his mind, tearing at him relentlessly—until, somehow, they all quieted the moment he felt the squeeze of a hand in his.

She had laced her fingers with his, drawing his attention. When he turned to look at her, he met a soft smile on her still slightly weary face.

"Are those Brazilian clouds already?"

He smiled and wrapped an arm around her, pressing a kiss to her temple.

For the first time in a long while, he felt his anxiety finally leave him.

[hauntedbydreams]

Ik im so late to the Xmas!Vi fics but I’ve had an insane holiday week and didn’t get to finish my Xmas headcanons, so here it is now… it’s kinda meh but I still had to post it cause come on! Xmas Vi is so cute.

Xmas!Vi Headcanons 🎄

Vi can’t wrap Xmas presents for shit, it’s kinda funny

But it’s your first Xmas together and she’s trying really hard but the paper keeps ripping and she’s got double sided sticky tape all over her hand bandages

You can’t help but giggle as she sighs frustrated laying her hands on the kitchen table, leaning on her arms and sulking.

Your hands wrap around her as you lay your head on her shoulder. “I got this honey, can you go get the Xmas decorations and grab the tree from the garage please?”

She’s still sulky as she turns around in your arms and looks down at you. You grin up at her “I’m sure I saw some mistletoe in the decoration boxes…”

She’s smiling and is pulling on her boots before you can say anything. “Be right back” she winks at you.

She brings the tree and the ornaments and you can already see the knowing smirk on her face while you finish wrapping the gifts.

Decorating Xmas tree w Vi consists of her holding up mistletoe every 6 seconds and winking at you.

After the 3rd time you’re eye rolling so hard and about to snatch the mistletoe out of her hand when she pulls it higher out of your reach and grabs you toward her by the waist.

Your faces are so close now, you can practically taste the million candy canes she ate earlier (and then complained about a bellyache)and hot chocolate on her breath.

She’s still holding the mistletoe above you when she says “one last time? I promise” and then she hits you with the puppy dog eyes and you can’t help but crash into her lips.

30 minutes later and you’re almost done decorating the Xmas tree but you take a look at the side she was hanging ornaments on and your jaw drops.

“Violet! Are you kidding me?!? You can’t put two red baubles right next to each other and all the blue ones on the same tree branch!!!”

She knows you’re annoyed but she’s stressing cause it’s just a Christmas tree and why are you using her full name?!?

That’s only reserved for when you’re really mad. This can’t be that bad right?!? (I swear she panics anytime you call her Violet instead of Vi or any of the 60 pet names you guys have for each other)

“I’m sorry! I was just hanging them rando-“

“But this looks like a 6 year old decorated our tree! It’s our first xmas together Vi, it has to be perfect!”

You sigh when you see her all quiet and looking down at her feet. “I need this xmas together to be perfect”

“I know honey, but it’s just a few ornaments, plus I kinda think it gives the tree a chill look.” She’s grinning at you batting her lashes trying to get out of her lil fuck up.

“Really Violet? The tree’s got a chill look?” You snort “Who are you?!? Did Ekko and Jinx teach you that word?”

“What? No!” She protests getting all defensive “I’m chill! I can be chill!”

“Oh my god, please just stop saying ‘chill’, please.” You say as you snag a piece of mistletoe and raise it above her, moving in for a kiss to shut her up before she can say “chill” again.

She’s kissing you back eagerly in an instant and then she pulls away with that little sparkle in her eye “if mistletoe is how you shut me up when I fuck up the Xmas decorations, I might just have to make it into an Xmas tradition!” She’s laughing and kissing you again. You can’t help but roll your eyes and smile into the kiss.

Oh and then after everything’s done and the whole house is decorated you decide to pull out one last surprise…

It’s your early Xmas present to Vi

You quickly go change into a red pj set with white fur trim, cute lil shorts and a low cut top.

You decide to throw on a deer antler headband as well before strutting into the living room where Vi is still arranging the Xmas gifts under the tree that you had to redecorate to save it from her “chill” style.

She’s not really paying attention till you call her name in that bedroom voice she LOVES.

“Vi… baby can you tu-”

“Holy shit cupcake!” Her eyes are about to fall out of her skull and you’re pretty sure that’s a lil bit of drool on the corner of her lips.

“What’s this?” She’s up and walking toward you almost too scared to put her hands on you in case she’s just imagining things.

“It’s your early Xmas gift baby. You like?”

She looks you up and down, RAKING her eyes down your sides “Do I like it?!? I love it!”

Then she’s picking you up bridal style and carrying you towards the bedroom as you giggle.

“You know who might not love it tho? Santa. I bet you’re on his naughty list this year.”

You laugh at her tragic Xmas themed flirt attempt but can’t help and play along. “Oh yeah? What about your list?”

“Oh you’re the only thing on my naughty list this year pretty girl”

[purityonice]

💙 BRANCH X AUTISTIC! READER 💙

calming you down.

Requested? Yeah :)

TW// panic attack!

Also sorry if i got this wrong dont be afraid to correct me!!!

im sorry i havent been posting ive just been busy plus i had mad writers block!!

Branch knew you were different, thats why he liked hanging around you.

You two had so much in common and he felt like you were the only one that got him. Even his best friend Poppy didn’t get him like you did.

He never knew why you were so against taking off your headphones or joining in on any of the parties but he was glad for it.

So he knew that when Poppy decided to throw another massive party just for funsies you would come knocking at his door. But not how he expected you to.

“B-Branch! open the door please!” You cried out desperately your hands covering your ears as you crouched down staring at his trapdoor. A loud bang and a bright flash assaulted you as loud cheering could be heard from a mile away.

Poppys parties had become so much more intense after the truce with the Bergens and this one was the worst.

Branch leaned on his lever as he yawned adorned in his robe and coffee in his hand unaware of your predicament. The elevator came to a stop as he began to undo his series of locks, the sound of the party drowning out your whimpers.

The final lock was undone and he swung open the trap door, your scared face looking down at him trembling trying to calm yourself down.

Branch’s face dropped as guilt bubbled up inside him, wondering how long you had been waiting for him. Quickly grabbing you and pulling you inside, closing the door and locking it again.

As you writhed from the sudden contact the bunker was alot quieter than outside, the music was muffled by the underground walls while you swayed back and forth on the ground. The feeling on the elevator soothing you abit as it began to descend.

“Are you alright? you dont look so good.” Branch finally spoke his voice laced with worry as he lowered himself down to your level.

You couldn’t respond your body was to letting you speak as Branch sat besides you.

He knew what was going on all to well.

“uhm- I have this place that I go to when i’m feeling overwhelmed… do you want to go there?” He said softly his eyes gazing your body as you shook your head yes. A soft warmth in his stomach grew happy that youre starting to reapond to him.

“I also have this technique to help want to try it? its going to be awhile before we get there my bunker is pretty big.” Branch asked his eyes never leaving you waiting for you to respond. After you agreed he got right into it.

“Okay just think of three things you see, hear, and smell. it always helps me.” He yawned out streching his legs as you stimmed beside him.

your eyes darting around the little elevator walls as rooms passed by.

Storage room, dirt, Branch

Branch looked at you as you stared at him a heat rising on your face as you closed your eyes to hear better your thoughts begining to calm down as you swayed back and forth.

The elevator gears moving, very faint music, Branch

Branch was shuffling around in his spot his soft grunts as he got up from his place probably to quickly grab some stuff knowing him. His body plopped softly on the floor besides you again a soft jingling following.

Keeping your eyes closed as you began to smell the area that surrounded you a soft pop was heard but never the less you continued, this was really working.

Oil, dirt, Branch.

He smelt pleasant like fresh from the shower nice, the would explain the robe. Your eyes remained shut as you soaked in Branches scent not realising that he was now speaking to you. He snapped his fingers infront of your face to grab your attention.

Your eyes flutters open to a few fireflies illuminating the area the soft buzzes of their bodies was so nice as they danced infront of you both.

“You smell so nice Branch.” You said bluntly while your eyes were still locked on the bugs that flew ahead of you. He was taken a back and let out a chuckle as you started to shuffle closer towards him.

“This is so nice thank you for helping me Branch.” your voice was soft leaning your head on his shoulder as you listened to his breathing.

Branchs body was stiff feeling you drape your head on his a his body heated. A dorky smile on his face as he looked into your eyes full of light. A soft smile plastered on your face while you just let your surroundings soak in.

“So did you still want to goto the room I was talking about earlier?” Branch said feeling you nod against his shoulder you interwined your hand with his as you looked up at him.

“Yes please.”

[strongheartneteyam]

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!dreamwalker!reader/female!human!reader

Chapter 6

CW: lots of angst, jealousy is not even the right word to describe neteyam's state anymore, emotionally hurt neteyam, yandere neteyam, reader has a hard time trying to fight her feelings for neteyam, mentions of using someone with the intention of forgetting someone else, mild violence, mentions of sexual fluids, possessive and territorial neteyam, mentions of depressive symptoms, use of alcohol, feelings of fear, tension, confessions of love, fluff. I think that's all (??)

✨ IM BACK ✨ I can't even believe I managed to finally update this fanfic! 😂 All of a sudden I spent days on end being a 24/7 nurse for my spayed kitten and didn't have time for anything + having to give her 2 different pills at 2 different times, all during the am hours, plus another one in the morning, left me SOOO sleep deprived. It was horrible. Thank God she doesn't have to take the pills anymore. ANYWAY lol Guys, in the beginning of the chapter until the middle of it, I think, I know you guys are gonna want to murder me or reader or both (you know that y/n meme with the pic of the blonde girl "choking" her own shadow in the wall, saying like "babe this is not us" or smth? so… pretty much that! lol) BUT I PROMISE it's gonna be really good in the end 🥲 trust me, please 🥺 it's the moment most of us (yes, me included!) have been waiting for! 💕 Also, this is a longer chapter, compared to the usual. Maybe a compensation for my absence? Idk! lol I just hope you guys like it! haha OKAY if I say anything else, it'll be a spoiler lol love y'all to death!!! my readers are my babies, my lil angels… I truly freaking love you guys so much!!! 🫀⚘

Not proofread.

Chapter 5

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

I can see you standing, honey, with his arms around your body

Laughin', but the joke's not funny at all

(...)

I can see you staring, honey, like he's just your understudy

Like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me

Second, third, and hundredth chances

Balancin' on breaking branches

Those eyes add insult to injury 

exile (Taylor Swift, Bon Iver)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

The air was thick and chaotic at the Olo'eyktan's hut that morning. Everyone seemed to be a bit too restless, either getting ready to go show up to their duties to the clan, like Neytiri, or thinking about some personal struggle, like Kiri, who was lost in thought, looking a bit sad. But she was also mixing some herbs and flowers, preparing a thick, violet colored substance that was used to treat wounds, that she would later give to Neytiri. Kiri would always help Neytiri a lot, assisting her in her Tsahìk position in the Omatikaya clan.

But Neteyam still stood out among the whole family. He was unmistakably grumpy that morning, Lo’ak noticed, as he was - once again - watching the weird way his older brother was behaving. Neteyam was not being his usual calm and caring self. He was not trying to take care of everyone, not giving out smiles and trying to cheer his siblings up. He was even distracted when Jake was giving him instructions about how today's training would go and giving him other orders, like telling him to keep an eye on Tuk whenever he's able to, as she was growing and becoming even smarter, more energetic and mischievous and was starting to get into more trouble, sometimes even picking fights with other girls in the clan, becoming a bit too much like Lo'ak, which had been making Jake rub the sides of his forehead in worry lately, way more often than he liked to admit.

"The Mighty Warrior, distracted when dad is telling him what to do?! What the fuck is happening?!" Lo'ak thought. Something was very wrong. And Lo’ak was determined to find out what it was.

Neteyam sat with his legs slightly open, his hands were crossed, his elbows resting on his knees. He had a lost stare in his eyes, gazing at the nothingness, looking like he was mad at someone who had just maybe punched him in the face.

He did not know how to deal with it all, that turmoil of emotions you were causing inside him felt overwhelming to the Sullys first born. He had taken on just so many challenges throughout his life and conquered most of them, but he feared you were gonna be a war that he might lose. He had to admit it bruised his ego. Suddenly, he did not feel like such a Mighty Warrior after all. An adversary that most people would judge as a weak one compared to him, a mere human girl, so small in comparison to his size, was defeating him. Suddenly all his skills with bows, arrows, big knives and even big, intimidating shotguns were not enough.

And Neteyam felt lost. He did not know what to do. For the first time in his life, his rational and smart brain could not seem to produce a war strategy that could help him win. Win you. He felt just like a wounded warrior, bleeding on the floor.

༊⁀➷

You decided to finally answer Derek’s messages today, after ghosting him for a while. You were feeling weird and lonely. And shaken. God, still so shaken... What the hell happened last night? Did that really happen? Was it all just a dream? You could swear those words Neteyam Suli had given you, about how he was in love with you, that his hauntingly tall and broad figure, vulnerable, kneeling on the ground in front of you, telling you he could tell you desired him too, had all been just part of a weird, eerie, anxious, borderline wet dream.

You knew very well what you were doing to Derek. You were using him to forget about the mess Neteyam was making of you. You knew that was wrong and you did feel guilty and ashamed. But you also knew you had to step back into your old reality, into that familiar world, into your comfort zone, a place where there were only regular human guys interested in you, not that current unsettling reality you were living in - you could still swear it had all just been a dream. Or a nightmare, perhaps. You were not sure -, where there was an almost 10 feet tall alien boy pursuing you, declaring his love and his nearly inappropriate desire for you, talking about the intimate parts of your body in a way that made you uncomfortable, anxious but... that lured you in too, at the same time. You needed an escape from it all. Your already disturbed mind did not seem able to deal with those facts at that moment and Derek seemed like the perfect distraction. 

Damn, what had you become? That was not ethical or moral at all - using a human being like a tool to distract you from your conflicting emotions - but you did not seem to be capable of caring too much about being ethical or moral at that time. Your whole perception of the world seemed to be changing. You felt bedazzled and unsteady. You did not want to admit to yourself that you were starting to feel too much for Neteyam, that you were running away from your feelings like a thief runs away with an expensive item he just robbed. No, you were not in love with him. How could that even be? Everybody knew the na’vi don’t get romantically involved with humans. Your races were more like enemies than buddies. There were only a few humans who were loyal to the na'vi and maintained a somewhat close relationship with them, but never a romantic one. What was making you and Neteyam feel like that for each other? That could only bring problems and you sure as hell did not want more trouble in your already complicated life.

You would be better off sticking to a human male instead. It was safe and familiar. It did not make your anxiety skyrocket. But it also did not excite you a single bit. Derek caused you nothing. You could barely even feel actually turned on when he touched your body and kissed your lips. It was just like he was a habit you had gotten used to, making out with him here and there, to numb the pain you felt inside your heart almost all the time. His biggest efforts to make you wet never seemed to work. Meanwhile, Neteyam got you wet without having ever touched you. That sure spoke loud enough. 

So why were you rejecting Neteyam and going after Derek?

Maybe you felt too afraid to take a risk, to follow your heart. God knows following that damn reddish muscular organ had put you in the worst situations possible in the past. You felt numb but you felt safe. And safe felt good. Bearable, at least. You were afraid if you gave into what you felt for Neteyam you just might explode. The feelings were that strong. You did not know what to do to try and ignore that tiny but extremely annoying creature inside your brain that would always be whispering “What if something actually good came out of it? Take a risk. For once in your life, don’t play it safe.”

But you were choosing to play it safe, anyway. At least this afternoon. You were gonna meet Derek, after two weeks without doing so, and just hang out, eat junk food, drink some alcohol and talk about non important things, just laugh and be silly, like you two always used to do. He was a good friend. Too bad he never made any type of fire light up inside of you, not even in the very beginning of your rendezvous, that’s why you never got to have sex with him. You were simply not interested. At all, to be honest. You wondered why you still insisted on being physically intimate with him. There were many things in your life that you did and did not really think too much about. They were just pure routine, they just kinda happened and you let them, almost like you weren't really living your life, but only a mere spectator to the events that were happening to you. And it seemed like you felt too emotionally numb to put an end to them. Your involvement with Derek was one of those things. He started to flirt with you one day, you were bored and you thought "why not?" and now, months later, you were still caught in this situation. If anyone asked you if there was any other reason why you were gonna see Derek today other than to try and get Neteyam out of your mind, you honestly couldn't say there was. It was crystal clear to you that, even though you were fighting like crazy to deny your feelings for Neteyam, you were indeed falling for him.

But how could that be? Some days ago, he was only an Omatikaya famous warrior - and, oh, let's not forget, the next Olo'eyktan of their clan - that you had only heard people talk about.

༊⁀➷

Neteyam was up in one of the highest tree branches he could find that day. He did not want anybody to see him, as usual, but he also did not want you to know he was watching you, either. He knew you were now aware of his constant presence around you. He knew you were not oblivious to his love anymore.

The sun was harassing his eyes, so he put his hand over them and squinted hard to try and see if the guy next to you, in the laboratory’s cafeteria, was really who he thought it was. When his eyes could get a better view, once the sun was not bothering them so much anymore, he felt something sinking in his stomach and his heartbeat accelerated considerably.

He had just confirmed who the guy was. It was that disgusting little human male that liked to act like you were his mate. Neteyam hissed ferociously, his protruding na’vi fangs looking scarier than ever, as his wide feline eyes watched Derek leaning close to your face and kissing your lips. Neteyam wanted to die - or maybe kill Derek - when he noticed you kissed him back.

༊⁀➷

You forced a smile while looking at Derek, after you had the initiative to break that damn kiss who seemed to never end. He seemed satisfied with the fact that you two had just kissed, contrary to what you were feeling. You honestly felt like you wanted to throw up. All you could think about was how it would feel to kiss Neteyam, to smell his scent again, that was so abundantly different from what you were used to, but that fact only seemed to make you want him even more.

You looked away to try and forget the ridiculous mistake you were making by being with Derek at that moment. You were looking at the ground and your gaze moved upwards. Now your eyes were directed towards the outside of the lab. What you saw startled you beyond reason. Neteyam was squatting, up in the branches of a huge tree, not too close but not too far from the part of the laboratory you and Derek were currently in. His fangs were out, seeming bigger than ever, as he hissed ferociously. Neteyam's animalistic side had completely taken over him and you could tell.

A chill ran down your spine. You could feel in your guts something bad was about to happen.

Your heart throbbed in pain as you saw how hurt he was now that he had seen you kissing Derek, even after he - Neteyam - had confessed his feelings for you in such a vulnerable way last eclipse. You saw in his eyes how betrayed he felt, like you were just silently telling him that his love did not matter at all to you and you'd rather be with any other guy but him.

༊⁀➷

"Hey, I'm going outside for a while, 'kay?" Derek spoke as he got up from the place he had been sitting, beside you, kissing your cheek "The boys are gonna meet me behind the lab in a while. "

Oh, no. Derek would not be safe if he went outside. Not with Neteyam spilling hate for him out of his soul like that. You had to try and find a way to keep Derek inside.

"Oh." You said, not being able to conceal your nervousness "Why don't you wait for them to actually get there before you go?!" You almost begged, visibly tense

"God, you seem nervous." He chuckled slightly, seeming uncomfortable " Is everything alright?"

"Yeah! I just want you to spend some more time with me." You pouted at him, coming up with an excuse to try and keep Derek from going out of the lab

"Sorry, sugar. It was nice hanging out and stuff but I really need to go now." He was already walking fast towards the door before you could try and talk him out of that stupid idea

You couldn't let any of the people in that cafeteria know something was up, so, you pretended everything was alright and finished eating your chips and took the last sip of your canned whisky and coke and stood up, walking slowly (when you actually wanted to freaking run) in the direction of the lab's metal door that led to outside.

You put your oxygen mask on, took a deep breath and walked out the door. 

You heard a noise, it was like a really heavy object falling to the floor. You also heard some strong thuds.

When you started to walk around to try and see what was happening, you realized your fear had become reality. Neteyam was sitting on top of Derek’s squirming body, his toned, striped thighs straddling Derek’s torax. You gasped when you realized Derek was no longer wearing his oxygen mask and Neteyam's huge hand was over Derek's mouth, preventing him from screaming for help. Neteyam looked at him like a hunter looks at their prey, while his big fangs and loud hisses put fear in the human boy's eyes. Derek was completely terrified.

Your heart beat sped up insanely and your hands were now cold as ice. You were afraid for Derek’s life.

You knew that the way Neteyam was taking out his frustration and jealousy on Derek was indescribably far from okay but still, as cruel to Derek as it seemed, you still felt incredibly sorry for the Omatikaya in front of you.

At the end of the day, you had a big percentage of blame for what he was doing right now. You were confused and afraid and torn but you knew to whom your heart belonged and it was not Derek. So why the hell were you being so selfish to the point of hurting two boys at the same time just because you didn't know how to deal with your own feelings? You realized it was time for you to stop being a coward and put an end to that madness.

You could tell Neteyam was not okay mentally and you knew that you were being toxic too, that you were contributing for his mental state to get worse with your indecisiveness and fear, despite his efforts to show you he would never hurt you. You wanted to stop hurting him and help him instead, to finally let go and admit to yourself and to him that yes, despite the way you had been acting, you were in love with him too.

"Neteyam, don't!! Let him go, please!!" You shouted, running towards the human and the na'vi boy.

You finally got close to Neteyam. He stopped and looked at you, his eyes so fiery, the calm golden pools they always used to be were now boiling with feelings of anger, jealousy, hurt and betrayal.

"For me! Please?" You pleaded him, looking deep into his eyes while stroking his strong blue arm

You watched that beast inside of Neteyam slowly calm down, as his feline ears pointed downwards and his eyes became softer. He moved his hand away from Derek’s mouth and the human boy let out a series of labored breaths. Neteyam slowly got off of him, revealing his beyond intimidating height as he stood up, and stepped away from him.

You walked as fast as you could to where Derek's oxygen mask was laying on the floor and picked it up, checking if was broken (it wasn't! Thank you, Universe.) and went back to where he was lying down and gave it back to him.

Neteyam watched your movements and felt jealous when you got close to Derek, so, once you got back to the place where you were standing before, Neteyam stood right next to your arm. His instincts told him to mark his territory.

Derek swiftly put it back on. He was almost completely out of breath. Derek breathed in deep once the mask was covering his face, taking in all the oxygen he possibly could.

"Are you okay?" You looked down at Derek’s body, searching for any visible wounds. There were none, at best. "God, I'm so sorry about this…"

"Yeah, I'm fine, somehow." Derek seemed afraid, shocked, frustrated and angry, all simultaneously, as he got off the floor and got back on his feet

"Please, don't tell anyone that you saw Neteyam or that he tried to hurt you, okay?"

"What the fuck?!! This psycho almost tried to kill me!! Why are you defending him?!"

Neteyam hissed at him when he heard what he had just called him but you squeezed his arm and he looked at you, remembering your pleas were the thing that were keeping him from killing that small, pink male. Even though it hurt him deeply that you were protecting that human, he couldn't bring himself to ignore you when you were begging him not to hurt Derek. You had Neteyam in the palm of your hand.

"You don't understand! If you let anyone in that lab know what Neteyam did to you, the RDA will eventually know about it too! Do you understand how serious this is? Do you wanna see Neteyam dead?!" You urged him, looking deep into his eyes "You could even help start another war between the humans and the na'vi. Do you understand that it is a much bigger issue than it seems to be? Just forget about what happened and I'll make sure Neteyam won't ever try to hurt you again."

Derek smirked in contempt 

"How can you be so sure he will listen to you?"

"I know he will! He loves me. And… I love him too."

Derek’s face had a big question mark all over it now and his mouth fell open.

Neteyam seemed to be shocked for a while. He did not expect you to say that, at all. He thought you would never love him back. Neteyam couldn't seem to believe those words had actually just come out of your mouth.

You breathed in deep, trying to stay calm amidst all that chaos "This thing between us…" You looked at Derek "It's over. I don't know why I was still insisting on it, I never even felt attracted to you, in the first place. I'm sorry."

"I'm outta here! All of this shit that's going on… feels like a fucking nightmare"

"Can you do as I said and not tell anyone about Neteyam? Nobody, ever? Please?!" You were nervous, brows furrowed, talking fast

"Okay!! Just let me go now! I think it's better if you and I keep some distance from each other from now on. I don't want your crazy na'vi boyfriend trying to kill me again." 

Neteyam hissed at Derek again when he heard the word "crazy" and Derek rapidly looked at him, startled, but couldn't be brave enough to spend more than some seconds staring at him, so, he swiftly looked away 

"Neteyam, please!! He's going already." You looked at Neteyam, a bit angry and impatient, asking him to calm down "Just go, Derek." You spit out and sighed, feeling physically and mentally drained after having to stop that stupid fight

Derek finally turned his back to you and Neteyam and left.

You looked at Neteyam. His eyes were glued on you. Those pretty amber eyes. His face wasn't full of hatred and anger anymore. His demeanor was much calmer now. His body language radiated love towards you. His tail was wagging softly. You felt pain and regret consuming your chest. How could you have treated Neteyam so badly last night? You realized now you couldn't hold him to the same standards you hold human males. The na'vi are animalistic beings, in spite of their high intelligence. And worse, how could you be irresponsible enough to kiss Derek even not actually wanting to, making Neteyam see it and get as hurt as he did? You sure were being trashy.

"My tawtute…" he cooed as he turned to look in your eyes "I won't let you run away from me anymore." Neteyam had a big smile on his lips "I don't care if you try to. That's all I needed to hear, that you love me. Now that you've said it, even if you didn't say it directly to me, I'm gonna fight for you even harder, even if you keep trying to push me away, I will keep bothering you." He kept smiling, blissful "You're like an Ikran. I just need to be patient with you. Eventually, I'll tame you and you'll be mine. All mine, hi'ì 'emyu." (small cook) "Bonded to me through tsaheylu. I can be patient and I will be."

You could only look at him, stare at his face and ask yourself why. Why was he willing to put so much work into making you his mate? 

"I'm not gonna run away from you anymore." You finally said "I'm done running. I'm done keeping myself miserable and alone because I'm too afraid to trust you and let you in. While trying to keep myself "safe", I was hurting myself and hurting you. I'm not doing that anymore, Neteyam. I was so stupid… I can't really say what it is, but there's just something about you… I think about you all the time, since the first time I saw you when you appeared for me outside that window. I don't believe someone can fall in love so fast but…" You were about to burst into tears "I'm in love with you."

Neteyam looked at you with the biggest smile on his plump lips, while his heart beat uncommonly fast inside his chest. He was overwhelmed with joy but as he was seeing the tears welling up in your eyes, he felt like he was about to cry too. But he didn't. Having learned throughout his whole life to always act with self control and rationality in front of everyone, - not really by choice, but because he knew that was how the Olo'eyktan to be should act, to keep a good reputation, to let his people know he was strong enough to control his emotions and not let them get in the way of him making good decisions for the Omatikaya - his ability to show some aspects of his feelings was a bit impaired now and that included crying. Even though he almost cried in front of you when you rejected him, he couldn't bring himself to cry of joy, now that you were saying that you wanna be with him too.

"I'm sorry for… what you saw. Me and Derek. I never liked him, Neteyam. He was just-"

"Yawne, no." Neteyam interrupted " It's okay. I don't wanna hear about that human." He looked disgusted only by the thought of Derek "And I don’t want you thinking about him either. You're mine now. Just forget about him. It's me that you like, right?" He gave you a gentle smile now and you nodded your head positively "Then focus on me, yawntutsyìp."

You looked at him, shyly, and smiled

"So… Can I ask for a hug, now?" your heart beat fast inside your chest cavity as you nervously said that

"Oeyä tawtute…" (my human) "You don't even need to ask." He opened his big, strong arms as he spoke "Come here."

༊⁀➷

Taglist: @kitsunefirewail @tumblingdevils @a-blog-name-2003 @xylobee @nerdybouquetofkittens-blog @henhouse-horrors @lala-1516 @xylianasblog @samistars @crazy4books1 @explosiongamora @lik0 @your-girl-mj @darktyrantwinner @sereisstuff @yeosxxx @die4niyahhh @iman-lu @manumanulau @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @hana-yuri @thehoneymushroomhealer @melllinaa @annaibansworld @siriuslysmoking @avatar4eva @ellabellabus07 @badbishsblog @neteyamsmate4life @c-h-i-l @criticallybella

[hostilemuppet]

I know the reason why Branch never mentioned having brothers before was because the creators only thought them up for the third movie and then they had to find a storyline that would fit into the movie’s canon.

But I’m curious to know what’s your opinion on Branch’s brothers?

I mean, I know how you portray them in your AU, but I curious 👀 about your honest opinion of them based on what we learned from the movie.

I don’t know if anyone has asked this before and apologize if have and I couldn’t find it.

i like brozone! jd has been... soured for me after seeing how the fandom treats him but hes still funny when you dont have a bitch in your ear telling you he did nothing wrong

jd: i think jd was abusive. people get mad at me for saying this, but i dont care; he was in charge of his younger brothers and he worked them to the bone, he forced clay to wear underwear he hated and take photoshoots in them for gods sakes! thats freak behaviour! i think a lot about how he treated them, either directly stated by canon (the underwear thing) or inferred by canon + how theyd be treated irl (on top of the super strict workout routine bruce was probably kept on a super strict diet too, dehydrated to make his abs POP, he was MISERABLE). plus the fact he feels absolutely zero sympathy, he just says he "had a lot of responsibility", implying that his brothers should feel grateful for how he "took care of them" 🤮 ELECTRIC CHAIR! i do like how hes so full of himself though, i like how eric andre says he thinks hes the "alpha male" and thats something i feel like a lot of people are missing wrt his characterisation. hes not some cool, rugged, charming guy out in the forest; hes the guy who says he could TOTALLY survive a zombie apocalypse, guys!

bruce and clay: people have literally no reason to get mad at them for leaving the pod, im sorry. they were teenagers who moved out of the house, best case scenario because they hated their big brother, WORST case bc they were escaping ABUSE! yeah, they could have said bye to branch, yeah, they MIGHT have been able to keep in touch (for clay we dont know how long he was bumming around the tree before the last trollstice happened, i do think it was a few years though), but why are we acting like them MOVING OUT is some big crime? they werent gonna stay in the nest forever! BRANCH can be upset, he missed his brothers! we can sympathise with branch! that doesnt mean we need to DEMONISE them for not lying down and letting jd control their lives! bruce was a bit of a dick to branch though but its okay bc they made up. clay however did NOTHING wrong, put some respect on his name 😤

floyd: idk why both the fandom and the movie act like floyd is the only brother who didnt hurt branch, when hes the one who should have hurt him the MOST! he PROMISED hed come back, likely knowing he wouldnt, while the other three just said "sayonara, dont get your hopes up, see you never". floyd gave branch hope that theyd see each other again, and then fucked off for 20 years, not even TRYING to find branch! obviously floyd is my favourite, but most of that i freely admit is like... conjecture, and headcanon, and in the movie itself we really dont know anything about him other than "is gay" and "got branchs hopes up, only to let them get crushed". hes kinda an asshole! which could be fun, but everyone, including the writers ignore it! i kinda hope in the cartoon theres an episode that addresses how floyd never visited. i mean, even the movie says that jd TRIED to visit but found the empty troll tree and assumed everyone was dead! did the same happen to floyd? or did he just not care? without clarification you kinda gotta assume the latter, but im really excited to find out what secondary canon has to say about it!

[malka-lisitsa]

Well look at that it's 2024, and my new years resolution is to stay an unbothered icon queen, and hope the hater's die mad. But I also thought I'd take a second to shout out to the people who make the shit show of a year 2023 bearable, and even enjoyable in some cases.

As trash as the rpc has a tendency to be there are still a lot of you that make this place more than worth it. I clearly cant shout out to all 900 something followers but I can highlight some of you. If you're not listed don't worry I still appreciate you immensely for being here, these are just the people that have really impacted my time here so far.

@hybrid-royalty-main Damon you piece of shit, I hate you the absolute most, and I'm so glad youre here with all the boys tbh. You bring such a unique quality to each one of them. Especially were-jer, it has been an absolute HOOT watching you take on the challenges of a teenaged were pup.

@baby-royalty My sired child with loyalty so unwavering you make the sire bond in the show look tame lmfao. The universe pulled us together the second I stepped foot into this hellsite again and I have enjoyed watching you grow into the person and writer that you are now. I'm proud of you.

@klaeus Kiki I adore you sm, you and your knock off brand doppelganger and scruffy mutt hybrid (affectionate) I love talking about the show and dynamics and honestly just about everything with you. You try, and thats more than most people do for me. Plus your grafics are just chefs kiss.

@multi-royalty Maddie this is like 3 years we've been besties, the caroline to my Elena. I've loved watching you branch out into new circles of friends and grow as a writer. You're absolutely killing it.

@ofcrossrcads Cribby, my darling I adore you. You are simply the sweetest, and keeping you here aggressively as my friend was one of the best things ive done in my life. I am always right here if you need me for anything &lt;3

@petrovawitch Kenz, Katherine says fuck you for bringing her pain in the ass sister back- but im really glad you did. We adore you both even if we're spicy at times bc you know were brats hehe

@havvkinsqueen / @stanfordprepped My fellow digidestins, I am so happy to have met you. Both of you are just pure goodness spun into a little ball of sunshine. Honestly the most supportive people ever, the RPC needs you desperately. Just please remember that I have your back just as much as you have mine. We digidestin gotta stick together. &lt;3

Ok ok ok I cant shout out to literally everyone individually so these people also are super important to me and have made my experience here this year amazing, thank you for all you do-

@langdhon@ravenskeeper@salvatoraes@sarcasticsnackpack@sithdestined@nexusvcrti@ofvalor@imundus@brokenbrxther@loyaltylanced@spellsigns@ruinedmyself@ravmalakh@touchedbydestiny

[decepti-thots]

Do you have any tips for getting back into reading?

I do, anon!

So for context, as I said previously, I went from reading 50+ books a year to 5-6 a year max for about half a decade. Most of this related to a longterm downswing in my overall health and my executive dysfunction specifically. I would pick books up and never finish them; my attention span was dead in the water, as was my motivation to even try half the time. It took a couple years of active effort to get back to a 3 book a month average. So here's a few subjective tips I personally found helped. They may not be useful for everyone, but this is what personally helped me!

Some of the techniques I used:

Follow your interest and enthusiasm, and don't be afraid to hop around books. I was stuck in a rut for ages where I'd start a book, lose steam, and vaguely want to read another one instead... but I insisted to myself 'no, I need to FINISH this one, I can read that one when I'm finished!' Obviously, I just never finished the books period, rather than methodically finishing everything one at a time, as I'd hoped I would. I read less, not more. The most important thing period is getting momentum back up; better 4 'still not finished'-s on the way to the book you unexpectedly finish in one sitting than nothing finished, and just a vague sense of guilt. If a new book calls to you and your current one feels interminable, seize that urge and start the second book so you can keep your motivation going. At least you're reading something then; the alternative was usually just not reading either book, for me.

Try some shorter books. I read a lot of novellas to get myself going again last year especially, and it was fantastic. Again, it helps get the momentum going, to be continually working up to longer stuff. (Plus novellas are just a great medium in their own right! Length =/= depth. SFF especially is having a real Novella Moment rn!) Hell, read short story collections, read poetry chapbooks, read plays- if you can only read 75 pages before losing steam, find a 75 page book worth reading. There's tons of them.

Try and carve out reasonably consistent times to read. For me, I started saying that after work most evenings if I was still awake really late, that was now book time, not Twitter/etc time. I read on my lunch a lot at work, and on Sunday afternoons. You don't need to be rigid, that can just be restrictive, but make it a routine you can easily make time for on a predictable basis without hoping you'll spontaneously 'feel like it'.

Read shit you love. This sounds obvious but like. You can't easily branch out of your comfort zone into more challenging-to-you stuff til you have the momentum going, IME. Start off reading the shit you know you like, heady intellectual ambitions be damned. Yeah yeah, reading outside your usual lane is often rewarding, but it'll wait a year til you get back in the swing of it. Read 50 romance novels in a row if that does that for you. The other books will wait. Likewise: reread shit you know inside out. Your to-read list will be here once you got a few of those old familiar faves in.

Those are the big things I guess. A lot of it was locating what really resulted in bottlenecks for me and tailoring what and how I read to them, instead of trying to force past them. Finding the books that fit what I could manage helped me reach a point now where I can read more broadly again. It's like building endurance, you can't start at 110%, I found.

[wr1t3w1tm3]

The Outsiders Vampire AU - V1

Welcome to the Degeneracy, ladies n' gents.

It started with Steve... of all people. One night, only three raw months after the Curtis' parent's accident he climbs through Pony and Soda's window and yanks Soda awake. Begging for help.

Sodas next. Steve's practically a hatchling. He has little control. He retains enough sense to do the deed outside the house. Both boys wake up the next morning in the lot and thank the Heavens that it's cloudy.

Darry and Pony are worried, but Pony's not over his last tiff with his eldest brother and suggests that Soda was already at the DX. With Steve supposed to be in school that day, there's no way of knowing until lunch time. Ill at ease, Darry hurries Pony off to school and heads to work.

Steve and Soda clamber through the same window Steve broke in hours prior and crash. Soda is dead tired still, and both are somewhat toasty from the sun coming out as they reach the house. Steve wakes before Soda, and some part of him realizes that he's got to get Soda right before Darrel or Ponyboy get back. He doesn't even know what he is anymore, but he sure as hell doesn't want to bring anyone else in unless he has too. Soda's already one to many. He grabs a couple squirrels from the trees out back - able to jump up and reach them even in the higher branches - and he gives them to Soda. He has to turn away, but the sound Soda makes as he sucks them dry is enough to make him sick.

It's not enough for long, and even Steve is starting to get hungry again. They discuss it briefly. They'll head over to the DX for work - Soda'll fib 'bout being sick n' Steve's not 'spossed to be in 'till four anyhow. They'll 'grab some'in' on their way back.

Work does not go well. Neither of them can keep their wits about them long enough to do much. Once the garage closes at eight their boss sends them home with a stern warning to get their shit together. Soda has to hold Steve back. The way the man yelled, his neck bulged, and his veins popped particularly pleasantly. Soda's still got some wits 'bout 'im, but not much.

On their way back they see a sign advertising a blood drive at the University of Oklahoma the next day. The truck's probably going to the medical center. They'll catch it after work.

Neither mentions how disgusted they are.

The next is Johnny, then Pony in rapid succession. Darry's still at work, doing the books now that it's after five. Johnny and Pony are trying to do homework. Pony smiles and gives them a little wave. Johnny glances up then back at his schoolwork.

Soda can't hold Steve back this time. He goes for Pony - he's closest. It's easy. One swift bite to the neck. Pony doesn't register what's happened until he's practically limp. Immobilized by whatever the fuck they inject when they bite. Johnny leaps from his seat, but there's blood in the water. With a crazed look in his eyes, Soda jumps 'im. He's knocked on his back and out cold in a few milliseconds.

When the two boys come too, it's to Soda cryin' n' Steve trynna comfort 'im. Both Pony n' Johnny are weak on their feet. Steve offers to run to the hospital and get somethin' to drink. Soda stays behind to keep an eye on them.

Luckily, Darry works late, and Steve arrives with the blood with plenty of time to spare. He has several for Pony and Johnny, plus a couple extra. Soda takes two, mentioning it tastes better than squirrel blood. Pony writes that down. Johnny nods but doesn't talk much. They all agree that they'll hang out for the night and meet sometime early the next morning - preferably while it's still dark - to discuss things.

When Darry arrives, everyone's lounging on the couch, watching tv. Two-Bit comes by, reeling drunk, and Soda has to physically dig his nails (which suddenly don't feel all that much like nails) into Pony and Johnny to keep them off Two-Bit. But he leaves quick enough and Darry heads to bead without more than a cursory 'good night'.

They pow-wow outside. Steve and Soda share what they know: they're tired during the day but are fine. Sun hurts more, so lots of sunscreen. Pony actually throws away his cigarettes, unable to take the smell when he lights up. They agree to meet in the lot the next evening and come up with some sort of dinner plans.

Steve and Johnny head home. Pony's worn out enough that he falls asleep easy. Soda tosses and turns, keyed into the beating of Darry's heart in the other room. When he wraps his arm around Pony, he's cold. Too cold.

They meet in the lot and head to the medical center. They steal blood right out of the back of the truck - draining it into several beer bottles too look less suspicious. They end up back in the lot, drinking. Two-Bit joins them. Luckily, they're satiated. They're not tempted as they were before. It's a relief.

Over the coming months, the start to figure things out. Steve reveals he was jumped attacked by some Soc's when he was closing the DX the night he got bit. Johnny gets jumped around a month after they were turned - or simply bit, as Soda puts it - and Steve recognizes him. The Soc recognizes Steve too.

He's 'bout as useful as a drunk Two-Bit. Unsurprisingly, he's next. Wrong place wrong time. They'd just met at the lot to go on a "run" and Two-Bit wanders in, smelling like cheap beer and motor oil.

Johnny reports tearfully that Two-Bit's blood does taste like beer. He's out long enough for them to get him something, but they know it's not sustainable. They can't keep stealing from the hospital. It doesn't' feel right.

Two-Bit of all people suggests that maybe there's a balance: enough to take what they need, but not enough to 'go all the way'.

It takes a little practice, but they find that balance. From there, it's just finding the targets. They split up a bit: Steve and Soda 'hunting' together (Soda hates referring to it as 'hunting') and Pony and Johnny. Two-Bit is usually a longer, but he'll sometimes stick himself in with one of the other groups. They tend not to hang out all together at the same time. To suspicious. But they have a pattern: Steve and Soda pick out the actual hoods and crooks who come into the DX; Pony and Johnny do the same at the Dingo with Dally and Two-Bit, though he tends to take anyone he finds: he especially stalks the bars, still chasing the kind of drunk he used to get before he got bit. Occasionally (though he never admits it) Johnny will drink from his parents, using the balance Two-Bit came up with and taking enough for himself but not enough to kill them. He pretends he's counting calories. Now a days his parents are a more reliable meal than they've ever provided in his entire life.

They rarely talk about it. Better to just pretend like it isn't extremely disgusting and just roll with it.

Darry's next. It was only a matter of time. It's just a couple weeks before the Rumble. Soda's gone onto the night shift - saying that's where his boss needed him - and Steve's joined him, dropping out of school entirely. Ponyboy stays in, but he's perpetually tired. On one such occasion, he walks in, and Darry is home. He didn't have to do the books quite yet. Pony's tired, and very, very hungry. Spent from being at school all day. He slips.

Soda bolts up when Darry screams and works desperately to pry Pony off Darry. But the damage is done. Darry's out cold and quickly on his way to joining them. It's the first time Soda scolds Ponyboy: for waiting too long between meals, for not just nicking from a blood truck or some hapless animal in the neighborhood (as bad as they tasted). Soda calls Steve and Two-Bit over and it takes all three of them to hold Darry back when he wakes up. Pony barely arrives in time - despite the speed boost acquired once he was bit.

Darry's unsettled. Unsure. His livelihood - the Curtis households' livelihood - depends on his toiling in the hot sun all day. What'll they do now? Two-Bit jokes that he could be a bouncer at Buck Merrill's. Soda assures him that as long as he wears lots of sunscreen, he'll be fine.

At first Darry's more like a kicked puppy. He's still imposing, but he acts like a gentle giant, unsure of himself. By the time the rumble rolls around, he's feeling much surer of himself. Pony and Johnny still make for Windrixville after Johnny kills Bob - only this time it's both boys who're responsible for sucking Bob dry.

Darry lets Pony fight this time. Johnny fights too, more confident without his scar and completely fine. Darry's still dealing with smoke inhalation when it rolls around. But just as their gang and Tim's are lining up against the Soc's, he comes runnin' in and all hell breaks loose.

Darry's the last to get bit. It's a Soc. The one who turned Steve. He grabs Dally, eyes aflame n' red, and brings him down. When they finally get to him, he's out cold. At first, they think he's just been clobbered, and they carry him back to the Curtis house. Then Two-Bit mentions he can't hear his heart beatin'.

He's barely in the house 'five minutes 'fore he wakes up. He's mad at first, but then he's cool as ever, but still pissed. The gang explains everything. Dally takes it in stride, jokin' 'bout how Pony could do all the rodeos he wanted and how Darry could be a bouncer at Buck's. And as much as it sucked, they would make the most of it. Soda assured them of that.

In the end, sure, it was Steve's fault. But in the end, they were together, forever. They'd really always have each other's back.

And for as long as he could, Darry worked as the Bouncer at Bucks (until people got suspicious of his youth and everyone was forced to move to Wichita and start over in the 80's).

All of this thanks to me trying to decide if Steve would be able to exist in the Outsiders in 1965 if Lestat - also a Tom Cruise character - from the vampire diaries already existed... and then I remembered they were from different exclusion zones, and it all works out until Steve goes to war. So, post canon (to The Outsiders at least). All for my fandamonium AU, which I'll be posting more of here soon.

[annoyangle]

Oh!!! Me? I'm from the other side of the multiverse!! It's a bit more calm over there, and I kind of help keep it that way? Creatures like me- we're supposed to be like...gardeners! We help the multiverse grow, destroy universes that are growing wrong, consume dead ones to make room for new ones, and even help cultivate new branches of the multiverse to grow!!

But- my family got more focused onnthe destroying part. Eating enough universes can give you power, and they want power. So they eat perfectly healthy universes too!! Its making our little corner really sick. Im...kinda of Too small to do anything about it, though. So I just try and pick up the pieces, and use the power I have to help make a new branch!! Right now its really small, just one universe, but I work really hard on it and I travel a lot to find more inspiration to make it even better!!

...and also to mess around a little. Since my corner is so wobbly, it's not safe to mess around too much, or universes I care a lot about could get really sick. So traveling means I can do things like make fun pasta, or mess around with the rules of a universe and see what happens without endangering people I like!! - Noodles :)

MM, GOTCHA. I'D SAY IT'S A LITTLE BENEFICIENT FOR MY BLOOD, TRYING TO PROTECT SPACETIME WHEN IT'S IN AN INFINITE STATE OF FLUX, COLLAPSE AND REBOOT ANYWAY, BUT THEN AGAIN, I'VE KNOWN MORE THAN A FEW "ANGELS" THAT STARTED OUT WITH THE SAME POINT OF VIEW AND CAME AROUND TO THE FUN SIDE EVENTUALLY! PLUS I REALLY LIKE FREE PASTA, SO. WHO'M I TO JUDGE? YOU GOT A POCKET DIMENSION? ME TOO!

[BODY SPLITS AND SEVERAL 'DRAWERS' POP OUT FROM VARIOUS PARTS OF BILL'S FRAME]

I GOT A FEW I KEEP CLOSE TOO. KEEP 'EM RIGHT HERE! [HE GESTURES AT ONE GLOWING SPOT] THIS ONE, THIS ONE IS EXTRA SPECIAL BECAUSE IT'S ONE WHERE HUMANITY MANAGED TO SURVIVE AND EVOLVE WITH JUST ONE EYE INSTEAD OF TWO! SO, YOU KNOW, I PULLED THAT ONE OUT OF THE GENERAL FLOW OF CAUSALITY AND HAVE BEEN KINDA RULING OVER THEM AS A MANIFEST GOD. WATCHING THEM GROW. TRAINING THEM TO MY BELIEFS. LIKE ANTS IN A TERRARIUM MADE OF MY OWN METAPHYSICAL STRUCTURE! WHICH REMINDS ME. [HE TAKES OUT THAT BRICK POCKET, HOLDS IT UP TO HIS EYE, GRINS AND THEN SHAKES THE BRICK POCKET VIOLENTLY, WHILE THE TINY SOUNDS OF GLOBAL SCREAMING COME FROM WITHIN!] HEHEHEHEHEH. GOTTA KEEP THINGS REAL IN THERE! IF I DON'T MAKE THEM FEAR ME NOW AND THEN, THEY MIGHT START THINKING I'M DEAD OR SOMETHING AND FALL OFF THE PLAN! [HIS SLIDING DRAWERS MOVE BACK INTO HIS CARAPACE WITH A LOUD CLICKING, LOCKING SOUND] WHO'S UP FOR ICE CREAM? YOU LIKE ICE CREAM, NOODLES?

[starlightandetherealshadows]

... can we have dimples OnO

IK its such a small thing to ask but like-- Theres usually quirk pages that include freckles etc but i rarely see dimples and i have them and im kinda insure about them so if its possible.. plz

ALSO A SCENARIO CAUSE YOU'RE AMAZING AND SO IS YOUR WORK

RO's getting patched up by MC who's.. surprisingly good at it. Worryingly good at it actually- MC's not a medic, and they're using their hands as if they were stitching themselves up-

Wait a minute MC, who hurt you?

Hi sunshine!

The MC customization so far is hair (styled, wrapped in a hijab, or buzzed), eye color, and name. I'm trying to keep as much of the customization up to the imagination of the reader as possible. The more details I make set in game, the more separate branches of details I need to add! Plus, the more detailed I make MC, the more likely it is that I will accidently leave people out and have gaps in MC representation, which I really don't want. This is my first IF, I'm but a baby deer fresh out the womb.

With that being said, I LOVEEE dimples and I actually have dimples myself! I think they add so much to our faces. Wouldn't trade my dimples for anything. And anon, did you know people get plastic surgery and use makeup to ADD to their faces what we were born with? We've been blessed by the dimple gods!! ♡♡♡

Onto your scenario ask! Thank you for your sweet compliment!!! ♡

So all members of the Lonely Loser Survivor's Club (A,V,Z,X,C) have been through some shit in their day both before and after the invasion, so they wouldn't be surprised that MC has experience with stitching themselves up.

After all, it's been two years since alien's invaded, and MC had been on their own for those years. They had to know how to survive. MC doesn't have to be a medic to know how to do that. (it would help, though LMAOOO y'all should see how dirty I do MC in the prologue.)

Even if we say MC has been hurt pre-invasion, again everyone in the group can relate on some level.

So it'd be less worry and concern and "wait a minute MC, who hurt you?" and instead "fucked up world we live in, huh?". They'd offer to talk about it, if MC wants to. but they wouldn't push you to do so. Just like MC won't push the RO's to open up about their own trauma.

X would be the most worried, simply because they haven't struggled in the same way as the humans have. They're the conquerors, after all. And they don't consider their upbringing in the militia "trauma" (although it totally is.....we'll get into that at another time) I think seeing MC be able to patch them up so easily will remind X just how many humans they've killed and how many lives their people have destroyed. It'd be a harrowing experience.

Thank you so much for your ask, darling!!! Have a great rest of your day! ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

All my love,

Cheye