#stuck in the drafts

[walker-extended-universe]

These are all fics that have not escaped my drafts, not even for a single chapter. I can't provide links like the last poll series but I will provide a general summar below:

3x18 Stella Got Shot AU

Summary: What is says on the tin. Stella was the one that got shot in 3x18 instead of Witt and has to go to the hospital. I also put in that Sadie was somewhat involved in the how/why Witt was there in the first place but also included reasoning as to why she helped.

3x18 Micki Insert

Summary: Micki was invited to James' wedding and she couldn't say no. She meets Sadie and has a little talk with August about potentially joining the military. She also catches up with the Walkers and talks a little about what her plans for her future are.

WIndy Hoyt csa fic

Summary: After saving a White Dove from a customer who didn't understand the word 'no', an event from Hoyt's past is dredged up. He tries to shove it back down and ignore it but trauma doesn't work like that.

The kids got kidnapped too AU

Summary: Sharon was paid by Grey Flag to lure the kids into a trap. Stella falls for it and August goes down with her. Stella is placed into the cell Julia was in originally, right above Cordell and Liam. August is placed in another cell near where Julia was moved too. All four members of the Walker family suffer various levels of torture. They are able to escape but all is not well as August has a seizure during his debriefing and is rushed to the hospital. We learn that he's suffering from mild brain damage and Cordell, who now knows how they got kidnapped, blames Stella for the whole mess.

Stella/Sam/Dean

Summary: Stella's off at college and gets attacked by a monster- and subsequently saved by two attractive older guys. She's very grateful and offers them a drink that she's totally old enough to buy. Things escalate from there.

Cordell/Jessica

Summary: Cordell is called up to New York to consult on a case involving a gang he worked with in Texas. While there, he ends up saving socialite Jessica Whitly from being hit by a car and she takes him to dinner as thanks. she's enthralled by the younger, attractive Texas Ranger and takes him home. Cordell hs to return home the next morning, hastened by an awkward interaction with her children (only a few years younger than himself). Jessica finds he left his scarf behind and plans to deliver it in person.

Geri objects at Cordell/Emily wedding but it's just a dream

Summary: In which Geri objects at Cordell/Emily's wedding because of her feelings for Cordell and things go badly- but it was all just a dream

Jealous!Geri arranges for Emily's death AU

Summary: Emily gets the loving husband, the kids, the white pickets fence, the stable life, the dream.... And what does Geri get? Revenge. (I had a phase okay sue me)

August got Sadie pregnant and now there's drama

Summary: Fic I'm collaborating with @theladywyn on. In which August and Sadie have a FBW-type relationship (because they don't talk about their feelings) and Sadie ends up getting pregnant. But also Sadie is arrested because of her involvement with Witt and his friends and she gives birth in prison. August deals with fatherhood at 17 and trying to juggle his new responsibilities as well as his old ones. A lot of pressure is put on both of them to do the Right Thing regarding their relationship and the family. There's a lot going on and there's much angst but there's a fluffy epilogue so there

Micki and Cassie being friends

Summary: Micki and Cassie meet at a bar and Cassie ends up spilling some of the bullshit Cordell and Trey and James have put her through in season 3. Micki is not happy to hear about this and insists on rounding them up to give them a tongue-lashing.

[forsworned]

Being the only female on TF141 is like Simon constantly scolding you for getting into sheningans with Johnny and Kyle while Price sits on his arm chair with a good book, whiskey in hand and him puffing out smoke like a chimney from his cigar like the daddy he is.

"Delete it."

"Why?"

"Cos I fockin' said so."

You cock an amused brow at him as you look up from the embarrassingly cute photo of the skull-masked behemoth fast sleep and cuddling your Hello Kitty plushie. "Cos y'fockin' said so?" You mock his gravelly Manchester accent and it sends Johnny and Kyle into a fit of giggles. And even Price is chuffed by it. It's contagious really.

It lets your guard down enough for him to yank your phone out of your hand deleting the picture with a swiftness that made your eyes ream and your heart jump. You all groan and jeer at him for being a poor sport but he's quite satisfied with himself. Little does he know, you have a few copies of it in your desktop.

[scratchandplaster]

I wonder how Avery and Shepherd’s interaction would be?

[tsururoach]

One way to survive in a ruined world.

+original drafts under the cut

[glowcowboy]

life is so hard i’m so glad it still manages to have the capacity to be really fucking funny

[kedreeva]

Silly question but how would you rate different gamebird chicks on a scale of "no brain cells, head empty" to "wait! I think I just saw a thought happen?!"?

You've mentioned before that turkey poults have the survival instinct of a chicken nugget, and I've raised coturnix chicks before which are like...death seeking missiles. Are other gamebird chicks as dumb? Are any recognisably better suited to not immediately kamikaze-ing into the nearest water fountain/single square millimetre of loose tape/one cold spot they can find in the brooder?

Peafowl chicks rate the highest. I know I talk a lot of shit about them, but outside of not eating unless shown the food (which IS a valid survival behavior, for avoiding toxic things in their native environment), they're not prone to doing anything actively stupid. They have great eye sight, they tend to look before they leap (and can fly if they do get into trouble). They have a sense of time ("bedtime" is a concept they have! Every hand raised baby I've ever had has had a strict idea of when they think it's time to go to bed and will scream at me until I agree). They will return themselves to the heat when it's time, I've never had one fail to do this or start screaming because they're on the cold side of the brooder and don't know how to move 1 foot to the left to get warm. I've never had one drown in the water dish even though they get a bowl or are raised outside with a pond/big water bowl. They can coexist with just about any other bird, which is great because their only flaw is they need to be shown food for the first few weeks, and adding something like a chicken will cause the chicken to show them where to eat. And because peafowl are large, all the other babies will follow them around for everything else. For creatures who grew up in an environment where very little (predator wise) can kill them, they're surprisingly adapted to not dying in really stupid ways in captivity. They ARE fragile in other ways (pick up parasites easily), but that's not a matter of stupidity.

Coturnix are so far the worst, and I am including Turkeys in this metric. Turkeys are at least hardy in a brooder setup, even if they are very stupid outside with mom. Coturnix on the other hand have to have a tiny lip to their water dish so they don't get into it and drown or chill (and they still do their level best to get into it, even with the tiny lip where they can barely reach the water, I sometimes check on them and find one Mystery Sopping Wet.... how..... and why...... and also HOW). I have watched one grab a drink of water, throw its head back to swallow, choke, and die immediately. There is NOTHING you can do for them if they fail at drinking water, by the way. If you pick them up too soon after they drink, or any other time, there's a non-zero chance that they immediately panic-vomit any water in their system, choke on it, and suffocate/die instantly so you have to be careful about handling them while they're doing their very best to make that as difficult as possible (and this lovely trait persists into adulthood). They cannot have access to anything they can get caught in/under, I have to put barriers in their cage and not give them a cold spot in the brooder until they're a few days old because they will CHARGE to it and sit there until they die screaming about how cold they are while 1 foot away from the heat. They still throw themselves at this barrier because they can see through a 1mm gap to either side that cold death awaits them with open arms and they desire it so badly. It's why they always look like this:

If you have them standing on your hand they WILL just walk off - nay, run full tilt off - without regard for if there is anything below them to fall ONTO, and they are fully capable of beaning themselves so hard upon impact that they die. I had to find a stuffie that was very light and a stuffie that was very heavy, because a medium weight is just light enough for them to shove themselves into the shavings beneath it and suffocate because they can't get out again, and they will also actively seek to do this. They have to have a solid-sided brooder because if they can stick their head through a gap a) they can probably get out of it if it's just a little bigger than their head and b) they will get stuck in it and break their necks if it's just a little too small.

The vast majority, 99% of them, are extremely easy to raise, and doing a minimal amount of guardianship in their brooder will protect them from themselves, but they do have a deep and abiding desire to be dead, I think, and there will be some you cannot save from themselves. No other game birds/fowl I've raised are like this- not peafowl, not turkeys, not pheasants, not chickens, not bobwhite quail, not even guinea keets... the closest would be button quail and even they are not death-seeking missiles until they're a bit older.

[potato-lord-but-not]

THE MIDNIGHT BURGER POST EVERYONE YAY YIPPEE

[harmonysanreads]

There's a ‘painting’ of a person's portrait behind his phone case — a splash of pink, red, blue, yellow, white and teal dancing together, forming an image that is sure to catch anyone's attention. His co-workers (or well, those who've managed to catch glimpses) assume that he must have a hobby of painting phone cases on the side, as the one he uses seems to not be found anywhere outside of his hands.

The subject of that painting is always in a peaceful slumber. The serenity on their face almost jarring in juxtaposition to the vibrant colors that cradle their form. It's enticing — enough to have a few people ask if he could paint a copy for them, too. He never quite promises resolutely on that offer.

But what no one quite expected to see was how... protective the man appeared to be of that image. Always putting the phone down on its screen instead of the back, never letting anyone look for too long and never allowing it in the hands of another. That much caution towards the image of a random person seemed strange — unless... it wasn't a random person?

That's when the rumors of a ‘lover’ begin. Well, what else could it be? A chance interrogation with this assumption from a particularly curious employee had the man breaking out in an unexpectedly bashful smile, thumb swiping over the painting by instinct — that was all they needed to know. Despite the lack of a verbal confirmation, it didn't stop them from sneaking in requests to bring the person who had him so smitten to work one of the days. Their reticent coworker merely smiled in response.

No one quite questioned or noticed the resemblance between that beautiful painting and the civilian gone missing for the past two years.

[gallusneve]

[thoughts-rambles]

Tonight, you were once again cuddled up to Mammon watching something together on his laptop. The now dimly lit room only served as perfect atmosphere for the action movie Mammon had picked out. As the movie played you let your mind drift to the scene around you. The warm hue of the bedroom lights, the contrasting cool glow from the laptop, the soft texture of pillows and blankets, the warmth the both of you had created, the feeling of his body next to yours; everything mixed together perfectly.

Earlier that night, Mammon had dragged you into his room stating that the cold devildom weather was too harsh for a weak human such as yourself. He continued, explaining that The Great Mammon would be so gracious as to allow you to huddle with him for warmth, and maybe even permit you to cuddle up to him if need be. You were his human to take care of after all, he couldn't let you freeze to death.

Now, however, it seemed his cocky demeanor melted away in the warmth of his bed. He leaned on you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pull you closer to him in return. You responded simply, grabbing his free hand and interlocking fingers with him. Even without looking at him you could imagine the look on his face, practically memorizing his expressions by now. As predicted, his face was completely flushed, with even the tips of his ears burning the gorgeous crimson you had come to associate him with.

Surprisingly, however, this time he did not pull away from your affections. Instead, he squeezed his hand in yours before bringing your knuckles to his mouth. He kissed them gently, placing them back down on the bed afterwards. You, now flustered, turned to face him in surprise, only to be met with his lips meeting yours. His lips were chapped, and his nose cold, and yet you wouldn't change a thing. You would simply turn your body towards him before cupping his cheek and bringing him in for another kiss. The movie was long forgotten, and neither of you could care less; you would much rather spend your night embracing each other. Even if you missed the ending, you could always just use it as an excuse to lay in bed together again.

[walker-extended-universe]

These are all fics that have not escaped my drafts, not even for a single chapter. I can't provide links like the last poll series but I will provide a general summary below:

Crime Family Walker- Cassie joins

Summary: Cassie stuffs Cordell in a trunk and he's not pleased with it. Cassie is arrested for assaulting an officer, but Cordell also wants to handle her the Walker Way. James manages to talk him down from murder and suggests they help her find Miles as a way to gain a hold over her. Cordell reluctantly agrees.

Cassie/Trey

Summary: Cassie and Trey are dating and they're getting ready to take their relationship to the next level- until Trey learns about the massive antique doll collection Cassie keeps in her bedroom. He makes an excuse to leave but things are awkward after that. Cordell has to fix this because he cannot work in this environment.

Nobody dies but everything still sucks

Summary: Cordell and Cassie both get shot while on a mission. They both make it through surgery but both of their families are extremely worried and taking it out on James and Trey. Also there's recovery time.

The many ways we could've avoided this nonsense

Summary: 3 ways we could've avoided the nonsense around Shannon and the mustang. Includes Stella telling James and the grandparents finding out.

Drunk!August telling on himself in 3x05

Summary: August got more than a little tipsy at the party and tells on himself for throwing it without Stella's help before Cordell can get mad at either of them.

1x18 Hoyt lived AU

Summary: In which Hoyt is around for 1x18 and plays the devil on Cordell's shoulder on how to deal with Stan.

Tom/Kate Heist AU

Summary: Kate Carver is a world-class theif. When she gets called upon to steal from the notorious Tom Davidson for one of his rivals, she initially refuses but the siren song of money and glory eventually win her over. The heist goes well until it doesn't and she finds herself at the mercy of the most dangerous crime boss in Texas. Sparks fly but neither of them can let it show. She talks her way into a deal where the works for him until she "repays" him and they slowly get to know each other better.

Cassie is pregnant with Kevin's kid but he's dead whoops

Summary: Shortly after 3x15, Cassie finds out she's pregnant and there's only one person the father could be. Stressed and confused, she turns to Abby for help to figure out what to do. After a lot of thinking and talking with everyone, she decides on keeping the baby. Trey, being the closest, gets assigned with Helper duty and ends up catching feelings. Baby is born while everyone is stuck on the ranch at Thanksgiving (again). She also opens the door for Cooper to be involved with the baby if he really wants to be but warns him not to make promises he can't keep (again).

Walkernatural Extra- Cassie/Dean

Summary: AU where Kevin is as he is in canon and not Adam Milligan. Cassie has been propositioned by Kevin and Trey and Cordell are eager to push her that way but she has Concerns. Dean listens to her and offers to help investigate. "Do you have any idea how many 'pillars of the community' I've had to kill because they were monsters?" After the truth about Kevin comes out, she calls Dean for comfort and they Get Comfy while watching Hawks Shadow.

Walkernatural Extra- Cordell at Azazel's Battle Royale

Summary: Walkernatural AU (because why not) where Cordell gets pulled into the Special Child battle royale with Sam. He helps Sam get the rest of the special children under control (though he's definitely freaking out) and kills Jake before he can kill Sam. However, Azazel's threats to his family have him worried and it takes a bit for Sam to talk him down and convince him that Dean and Bobby can help. He takes them all back to his family in Texas. Dean and Bobby are both a little weirded out by this "other Sam" but they don't think anything of it until Dean remembers the nursery originally had two cribs.

[talkfastcal]

Seriously need to let everyone know that I’m a wanderess, I’m a one night stand, don’t belong to no city, don’t belong to no man. I’m the violence in the pouring rain…I’m a hurricane

[crowswardens]

[scottstiles]

Girl, I am outta here. There's a DVR at home full of unwatched TV waiting to remind me how ridiculously single I really am.

[thevoidstaredback]

Hey! So, it's been a while, but I finally remembered to come back to this! But, it's not gonna go the way you'd think.

If Danny had it his way, he'd be at his Aunt Alicia's house for the summer instead of New Jersey. This place is gloomy, grimy, and soaked through with so much crime that it's a Problem(TM). Like, seriously? New Jersey hasn't allowed the death penalty since he was seven, but can't they make, like, one exception? Get rid of The Joker and half of Gotham's problems are solved.

Unfortunately, he's only here as a guest, so he can't really do anything. Which, for the record, is a shit rule. Call a goose and goose, and that's exactly what Gotham City, New Jersey is.

It isn't all that bad, he supposes. Sure, the pollution blocks out the entire sky at all times, the buildings that aren't condemned are only feeding the rich while stealing from the poor, an entire twenty-four block are has been given up on by mostly everyone, the local vigilantes won't kill the recurring problems like the cockroaches they are- There was a good point to all this.

Oh! He has family here. That's it. That's the only silver lining, and it's bronze.

But, hey, it can't be that bad. From what he understands, his half-brother and company don't actually live in Gotham. Bristol, according to Talia is technically outside of Gotham City Limits, but is still considered as part of the city. Makes sense, aside from the fact that there's no bridge between Bristol and Gotham. Weird design, but he's not rich so he's not really inclined to care or understand.

Half brother, right.

Danny doesn't like Damian much, but that's because he's a clone...of Damian. Danny's a clone of Damian, not the other way around. Ra's makes that very clear

The only reason Talia wants him with Damian is because she's upset with Bruce Wayne. What is it with divorced parents and putting their kids on the middle of their fights? Or maybe that's just Talia?

Anyway.

Gotham, New Jersey is a dismal place. Danny's not germophobic by any means, he can't really afford to be, but even he's having a hard time being in the city.

It was so much easier hiding out with the Fentons.

Well, 'hiding' is a subjective term. Ra's and Talia knew where he was, so did Deathstroke, probably, but that was it.

Essentially, everyone he should be hiding from knows where he's been hiding, which means he's just been on some kind of twisted, extended vacation.

As far as Danny knew, Bruce Wayne had no idea he was coming. Damian knew because Talia had wanted him to pick Danny up from the airport. Weird because while Damian is technically older, Danny is still legally two years older.

Well, 'legally' is a stretch. He doesn't technically exist, outside of the LoA and Amity Park.

The point is that Damian is waiting for him at the end of the terminal, looking as much like an excited puppy as he can, with an older gentleman. Talia had given him nothing to work with, but Danny didn't really care who this guy was as long as he didn't try to make him do anything he didn't want to.

...living in the Midwest was doing wonders for his mental stability, but Ancients was it making him soft!

"'Danny', I presume?" the old man asked, his accent heavy.

Good, so Talia did give Damian his actual name. "Yep. You are?" He may not want to be here, but he still knows his manners. Even if he's only going to use the bare minimum of them. Malicious Compliance and all that.

"Alfred Pennyworth, the family butler." He didn't extend his hand to shake. Danny didn't mind. In fact, he actually preferred that.

Okay, so maybe he's a little bit haphephobic. Leave him alone!

"Danny," Damian greeted, a smile of excitement in his voice but not his face, "It's good to have you here. How did Mother convince you to come?"

"Bribery." Mostly.

Damian seemed to deflate a bit. "Father and the others don't know you're here."

"Do they even know about me at all?"

"No."

"Perfect! Then I can stay at a hotel-"

"For the entire summer?" Alfred raised his eyebrow, "I must insist that you stay at Wayne Manor while in Gotham. Master Bruce will most pleased to meet you."

"Why?" Danny scoffed, "I'm not his kid, nor do I want to be."

Damian slouched a little bit more. "Come, we must get back before the others send out a search party for us."

"Dramatic much?" Danny scoffed.

"Not at all," Alfred took both of Danny's bags before leading the way out to the car, "It' happened before in less time."

"I don't doubt it for a second. I'm calling Bruce a dramatic bitch."

Alfred smirked ever so slightly. "Quite right, Master Danny."

"Don't call me that."

"Alright then, what should I call you?"

"'Danny'. No honorifics, no add ons, no trying to fullname me, nothing else."

"And when you go out with the rest of the family?"

He scoffed again. "You really think they'd let me go out with them? I'm an assassin. In fact, the first thing I'll do the second I'm let out of the house is kill the clown bastard."

Damian rested his hand on Danny's arm. "They let me out with them and I tried to kill Drake. As long as you uphold a promise not to kill anyone, you'll be allowed to patrol with us."

They reached the car, Damian sat behind the driver while Danny sat behind the passenger. Alfred put the bags in the trunk. "So? What will you be called on patrol?"

Danny rolled his eyes, popping his headphones in and not looking away from the window. "Respawn."

Masterpost Part 2

[majinbangus]

When you and little Simon come knocking on his door during Halloween wearing skeleton-themed costumes that lack a skull mask, big Simon gives some of his extra balaclavas to complete the look.

And when little Simon invites big Simon to go trick-or-treating, he wears his Ghost get up and little Simon thinks it's the coolest thing ever.

Meanwhile, you're wondering why big Simon has so many masks.

("I gotta ask," You inquire with the best nonjudgmental voice you got, but Simon can see the amusement playing on your lips, "why do you have so many skull masks?"

"Can't a bloke have his proclivities?" Simon answers as dryly as he can. "Maybe I just really love bones.")