#that is confusing

[lifblogs]

Obviously that person is being helpful and isn’t going to know what I know and don’t know or what I remembered, but I legit know this stuff, so it feels like I’m getting talked down to.

[ryan-sometimes]

LMAOOOO

[andisupreme]

At the company retreat, one extremely drunk girl asked what my pronouns were. (Eventually, it took her a while to word the question.) After the whole conversation was done, she goes- "YEAHHH GURL, Get on with--with THY bad self! See what I did?? They/them/thy."

I was almost holding back tears from trying not to laugh as I told her yes that's great you nailed it honey. Thank you very much I am feeling the love.

Anyway I've been assigned Thee/Thine at Supportive Drunk Girl

[filibusterfrog]

monty likes to sit in front of an open window and tell the bin men he loves them (they cant see him)

[mearchy]

my favorite genre of fictional character is like "i am terrifying to almost everyone, i'm very good at killing, i can endure anything, i've become exceptionally good at playing into my reputation, and if you try to give me positive social interaction i will react with confusion and cower in a corner like an abused animal. and i may try to shoot you. but there is also a chance i may imprint on you like a feral dog receiving its first loving touch! good luck."

[phanerozoicfossilgardener]

As a writer I need everyone to know that whenever I write "exchanged glances" my intent is this

[ID: A screencap from The Penguins of Madagascar television series. It shows Skipper and Private in a cinderblock room with the head of a stuffed fish visible in the decor. Skipper is carrying a corked test tube of pink glowing liquid. Skipper glances at Private with a single raised eye brow. Private meets his eyes with a blanker expression of possibly raised eyebrows. End ID]

[kathy-rah]

I hope this vampire bat running on a treadmill will make your day better

[stargatebarbie]

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

It's always so weird to come down from the biology heavens to see what the average person believes about animals, plants, ecosystems, just the world around them. I don't even mean things that one simply doesn't know because they've never been told or things that are confusing, I'm talking about people who genuinely do not see insects as animals. What are you saying. Every time I see a crawling or fluttering little guy I know that little guy has motivations and drive to fulfill those motivations. There are gears turning in their head! They are perceiving this world and they are drawing conclusions, they are conscious. And yet it's still a whole thing if various bugs of the world feel pain or if they are simply Instinct Machines that are Not Truly Aware of Anything At All????? Help!!!!!! How can you look at a little guy and think he is just the macroscopic animal version of a virus

[definitelysome1]

Tim (with a sigh): it’s my birthday today…

Jason: yeah, I know. I put a gift on your dining table this morning

Tim: ?!??!!??????!?

Jason: why the fuck do you look so confused?

Tim: no one has remembered my birthday since I was seven. I don’t even tell people my birthday anymore because they aren’t going to remember anyway

Jason: ?!!?!???!???

Jason: what the actual fuck

Tim: what?

Jason: not even goldie?? Or cas? Or Steph???

Tim: oh. Well, Dick always gets the date wrong and Steph never asked. I assume it’s because she thinks I don’t want to celebrate because no one ever tries to.

Jason: and Cas?

Tim: I think she knows, but she’s always been away on my birthday

Jason: what about your team? The speedster and the supers? Don’t they remember???

Tim: I’ve never told them

Jason: I-

Jason: did Bruce ever officially adopt you, or are you still emancipated?

Tim: he was going to, but then he disappeared and we never talked about it again, why?

Jason: I’m adopting you and then we’ll celebrate 10 birthdays to make up for the ones you’ve missed.

Tim:???!??!???

[master-thief-gray-shadow]

Everyone wants to talk about how Senshi is a tumblr sexyman but...Senshi is actually attractive. Like even aside from the fact that he's pretty good-looking he's a nice, sweet guy and he can cook and loves doing it. He's a perfectly eligible candidate for marriage, which kind of goes against the spirit of a tumblr sexyman.

Chilchuck, however? Chilchuck is a tumblr sexyman. What the fuck do you people see in him

[eggy-the-boy]

"Friends don't look at friends that way" I think some of you just need to be nicer to your friends.

[columboscreens]

[bluerasbunny]

this just felt like something he'd say

[notbecauseofvictories]

A customer contacted our team with questions, and then finished their email with: "I am daunted by the complexities and unknowns." I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since.