#this might / should be a part 1 of 2

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Siffrin plays Disco Elysium AU: Featuring backseat gamer Loop.

[crows-king]

I've been thinking a bit about how Galinda and Fiyero work as foils(?), and the contrast between their goals, personality, and their relationship to social influence individually change how they navigate their specific social situations.

And why it puzzles me when people judgmentally compare them and what they'd do in "What-If" scenarios as a gotcha to make one seem better/worst. Because in my mind they are similar but not comparable, because they fundamentally have very different personal stakes.

Primarily because of the difference in how they act in an Active (Galinda) vs Passive (Fiyero) approach to social engineering. And also, because one of them in writing is more developed as an individual than the other.

I'LL MOSTLY BE TALKING ABOUT: WICKED MOVIE - PART 1

Galinda is inherently Active. She has wants and desires that she's driven to achieve, and so actively plays the part of the good socialite because it will help her become more popular and to eventually become "Galinda the GoodSorceress". "It's not about aptitude, it's about the way you're viewed", and so on. It’s the one thing she knows she’s good at.

Of course, she also likes the attention and validation, but her charms doesn't come as naturally as she wants others, and probably herself, to believe. (I love that quote Ariana said somewhere about how "Galinda sees herself as a graceful swan, when she's actually a very stiff, but still beautiful swan", or something of that sort). She's insecure that she’ll lose people's favour and thus her most important asset, so she continually appeals to them. It's an act that she simultaneously enjoys doing for the most part, but also traps her from ever being truly close to anybody for fear of being known and not meeting expectations and losing that adoration. Until Elphaba that is.

Because of her drive to fulfill her dreams and to keep her best asset, and personal desperate need for validation, she has a much more obvious internal conflicts when she has to choose between Elphaba/the moral good vs keeping with the good graces of authority and/or the public. She's more prone to being influenced by others, and many of her choices become a calculated risk. She’s often times selfish and chooses her own desires, but it’s what makes her such an interesting and very human character. The struggle she balances when she’s forced to choose for better or worse.

In contrast

Fiyero is Passive. Dancing Through Life is literally him telling others that being lazy and not thinking is the best way to cope and enjoy life by ignoring problems. He is discontent with his life, but doesn't really acknowledge it until Elphaba reads him. Much like Galinda he is also playing a part, but it's not as tightly controlled as Galinda because he doesn't have an end goal for it.

Of course, while he probably doesn't want to lose his princely privileges. His passive "brainless" approach doesn't really put him in risky situations that would put him in conflict leading to losing things he cares about, because he really doesn't have a lot to lose. (Which is a byproduct of the fact he is primarily written as a love interest side character without much of an arc or motives outside his love triangle relationship to Elphaba and Galinda).

What confounds me is when people compare them and judge what their choices would be in if they were placed in pivotal moments, because we never really see them in situations with similar stakes.

For example, the Lion Cub scene. Most people interpret this scene as an act of braverism and heroics by Fiyero. And in some part it is, he's spurred on to save the cub, and he and Elphaba do. But it's telling that he only does this after everyone is asleep and there are virtually no risks. Any present social or physical conflicts that could arise? POOF! Gone. The worst that could probably be done to them is being punished, or even kicked out, if they’re discovered afterwards. Which Fiyero is not new to and doesn't really care about, and while maybe uncertain for Elphaba, is also unlikely because she's Morrible's irreplaceable pupil.

Some people use this scene as evidence that under his facade, Fiyero is secretly valiant like Elphaba thinks so. But I think in actuality tells the opposite. It reveals that Fiyero does care about the Animals, yes. But, the fact he only acts when prompted and there are no longer any present risks initially makes him seem less brave than Elphaba, and even Galinda. Because it contrasts with the Ozdust dance scene between the girls. Where Galinda had to make an active choice to do the risky and brave thing as an apology for hurting Elphaba, and offer to truly connect with her in front of everyone with the possibility of social out casting. She has an obvious internal conflict and risk assessment where she ends up picking the moral good over her personal comfort and social appeal. I'm genuinely curious on what kind of choices Elphaba, Galinda, and Fiyero might have done in that situation if they weren't given the perfect out by the magic poppies.

Would Galinda have helped in with the lion cub if she were awake? Probably, but who knows? Because in the narrative, Galinda isn't really put in a situation where she could choose good without being watched or without someone breathing down her neck. The prospect of being punished and kicked out from Shiz would also be most plausible and ruinous for Galinda. Morrible would definitely use it as an excuse to kick her out, or at the very least punish her, if she could, and it could throw away her only chance of achieving her dream of becoming a sorceress. She would have probably joined them in the end, though. If only to make sure they were safe. Compared to Fiyero, she has more conflicts of interests because she has personal aspirations and influence based on her reputation, and thus have more fears and consequences to consider in losing it.

Would Fiyero have joined Elphaba on the broom? Maybe, mostly likely. Because narratively, he’s never given a reason why he shouldn’t. He doesn’t see his worth and his skills intrinsically tied to public influence and opinion. He doesn’t have any wants or wishes he would have to abandon. He’ll have to leave his friends and family, but it’s not shown how close they really are to him outside Feldspar, his Horse friend, and he’s probably joining them anyway. He’s definitely more equipped to survive on the run compared to Glinda. Unlike Glinda, who is proven right in the end to being most useful when she can wield her powerful social influence For Good, Fiyero would probably be most useful as a sidekick to Elphaba. He was always written to be Elphaba’s follower, it’s no surprise. It’s also easier to take risks when you don’t have much to lose. But I think most people would agree that would make a less interesting story.

[skrunksthatwunk]

everybody stop what you're doing and bow before my very epic doll collection that i finally have 'w'

[definegodliness]

Enter my dreamscape.

Whether you are welcome or not is non-consequential. I will welcome you, anyway. Politeness goes a long way around here, even when and especially if words have no meaning.

The big white rat will lunge at your throat when you are caught within the bright white threads of the spider web of your own making. Ironically, to catch him. Yet his incisors will only pierce skin. He will shake and rip you like a rabid dog, but it's only blood. Your trachea is safe. So don't you drown in blood on me.

You will be chased, and killed, until death becomes your second nature. Death, of course, being the easy way out, waking up, yet the dying can still be quite jarring whenever it catches you off guard in its ways.

You are still welcome.

When you swim and feel a tingling sensation inside your stomach, you are gone. Just train to open your eyes, because the dream will end when the shark chomps down. And it makes no sense to drag this horrid scene out. You will choke, gulping for air. And when you hit waking oxygen again, it will feel like you were murdered, and got a second chance.

The weight of that you already understand.

You are welcome.

Reptiles are harbingers of betrayal.

Beware of them.

However, the Tyrannosaur is satirical. The recurring embodiment of childhood fears, and then for that reason, like a rocking horse, often. You'll think you can ride the creature home, eventually. But don't push your luck. Whenever you think you've outgrown yourself, you will be faced with new horrors beyond your imagination, to remind you there's still a child that can be tapped into.

Just so you'll keep imagining.

Welcome.

Have you died enough yet to understand? Then you will see the wraiths. The undead faces drooping with blood, embodying rage. White-eyed. Their mouths agape. Running, running fast and tirelessly, ever chasing after whoever they lock onto. Anyone who lives.

Who wants to live,

Until they will not, ever again.

Stay away.

You are welcome.

[the-butter-churner]

de selby (part 2) is so figueroth faeth coded

allow me to draw your attention to

aka athenriel's curse

aka "i want to socially disappear"

aka ANKARNA DO I EVEN HAVE TO EXPLAIN

I also think the whole thing with how this song functions in the album as the descent into hell, it totally makes sense with fig being the one to fully accept ankarna and safeguard her infernal domain. not only bc of the hellish connotations but the idea of a descent, of jumping in headfirst and trusting.

[smile-files]

a rundown of pl bluesky henry for the uninitiated, since he's a different (yet related and not mutually exclusive) characterization of henry to the one i've been dabbling in lately:

henry's occasionally antagonized by his superego, which, in certain high-stress and/or high-guilt scenarios, manifests as a separate voice in his internal monologue sounding a lot like a hybrid between his own adult self and mr ascot (in contrast to his id, which is a blend of his child self and randall and which is much less distinct); this superego refers to henry in second person and chastises henry for doing the wrong thing, which usually amounts to him doing anything remotely self-indulgent and/or not in direct accordance with another's best interest, and makes him hypervigilant of how he might be (or is) hurting his loved ones

largely instigated by the temporal paradoxes which have, among other things, taken randall away and returned him in a horrifically painful manner, henry has experienced a guilt spiral in which he believes his desire for randall's return directly and necessarily hurts randall, and, through a warped understanding of a certain time travel loop, believes he dooms himself to randall's hatred in the past by abandoning him in the present

in accordance to the above two, henry questions his relationships to those closest to him: among other things, he fears he has assumed a greater level of closeness than is really present, and wonders if these relationships are HIS at all (this causes him to obsess over what level of formality he should be referring to his loved ones with)

henry (eventually) enters a romantic relationship with dalston! yay! but the path to that is incredibly tedious given how henry thinks for a while the very notion of the relationship to be some sort of personal, selfish, aberrant delusion of his; and at the same time, he keeps thinking about his own issues, including his inability to deal with said issues, and pushes dalston away out of fear of involving him in a life he thinks is doomed for tragedy - but this doesn't work for long, since dalston is (thankfully) stubborn as all hell

on a related note... across timelines, henry has a 50/50 death rate. his relationship with dalston is one piece of the puzzle helping prevent him from choosing to shuffle off the mortal coil in this timeline

henry sleeps next to the corpse of an incarnation of randall! henry tries to trick himself into believing he's just asleep! henry wakes up and almost immediately has a panic attack!

henry practically goads an incarnation of randall/the masked gentleman into trying to kill him! he fails but ends up in a month-long 'coma' through which he isn't allowed to die (the 'coma' is only indirectly caused by this incarnation of randall)

henry is trying to parent the daughter whom an alternate version of him has; to some extent he's still disturbed by her very existence, given how she was conceived for the sake of maintaining this other henry's public image, but tries his best to give her a good childhood

worth noting too is that henry (as far as he can surmise) somehow has this strange device implanted in his brain which allows him to hear others' voices from afar and have his own voice heard over those same distances; the device can malfunction, giving him intense migraines, and has trouble hearing voices from people within, say, the akbadain ruins (which, relating to the azran's connection to the time stream, raises whether the device is somehow also azran technology)

henry has an... uncharacteristically poetic internal monologue

[uncanny-tranny]

So, I put this observation under the tags to a funny post, but it had me really reflecting on my childhood, and it's a topic I always keep in my mind.

I remember growing up with queerness as this taboo - something which was a he-who-must-not-be-named basis. I remember listening to the adults in my life talking scandelously about anything remotely queer. I think a lot of people are under the impression that children are simply dumb as rocks and can't understand anything, and while I didn't understand queerness, I understood that that was what I was.

I remember exploring my gender in the confines of cisheterosexual normativity. I saw myself in all of the male princes, the heroes, the idea that I could emulate the qualities of a Good Man when I was older, and it was weird. I knew that much about me, but I also knew that these ideas were never made with me in mind. I think that's a big part of what held me back from actively combating the life that felt forced onto me.

Part of me wishes to go back to the time I reveled in imagining myself as Prince Charming just to say that... you're right, you were Prince Charming. You saw the world that turned its cheek to you, and you retreated inward. Your heart was always on your sleeve, but you can make it. You will, you must.

[kingpains]

on the bright side i’ve figured out how to make auto actions in csp and made one each for a blur/noise filter and chromatic aberration. with the goal of looking like a screenshot of something from cartoon network in the 2000s

it took So Much trial and error to get the chromatic aberration to work well but once i learned that the auto action can only happen to one layer at a time i got it down pat

[certifiedmaidenlessblog]

Trying so hard not to be a detestable human to my project partner

[theunconcernedembalmer]

idk how long my laptop will survive seeing as i hardly use it anymore so anyway here's an abandoned project from a couple of years ago where i ambitiously tried to make an rpg with the yokai outfits. here are some sprites i made

[thompsborn]

tbaf parkner vs wanting to say i love you but not letting themselves say it before they're eighteen bc of their promise to each other vs the relief of finally saying it: two 5+1 fics, one from each pov.

[indigodawns]

.

[monster-noises]

There are things about my struggles with singleness i will gladly prattle on about on this web site in post after post and i Have, certainly;

but there are parts of the struggle I have just a damn hard time posting about despite really reeeeaallly needing to get out so i can maybe go focus on something else for a bit

And I mean this applies to more than just my (really uneventful but somehow just as consuming and complicated) dating life, but right now that's what i'm pacing around my apartment muttering about when i should be making sure my dinner doesn't burn and having my dishes done. So.

[thaliagrayce]

i've been talking abt my voltron playlists and @iveofficiallygonemad asked to hear them and i want to share with anybody who wants!! i know they're not perfect, i'm working on them & trying to make them better. if you have any recommendations for any of them, let me know!! there's like A Lot and i want to give a lil explanation for most of them, so i'm putting them under the cut ^-^

SO first i have my favorite one <3 it's just. all of them. it's the whole team. it's a mess and it's a bunch of different genres because it's them fighting over the aux cord on a road trip. it's them trying to make each other laugh or annoy each other or play something catchy enough it will infect everyone in the vicinity with brain worms.

Hunk: i'm pretty happy with my Hunk playlist! chill vibes. he strikes me as the kind of guy who listens to calm music to try to find his own calm, and that's what i got here :)

Pidge: this is messier and less cohesive than my usual playlist because frankly i think pidge would have a shit taste in music. all over the board. this is a mix of meme songs and 8-bit covers and vocaloid and stuff that i think pidge would genuinely connect with, and i think pidge listens to all their music on shuffle without any regards for genre or mood because they're a gremlin. nobody gives pidge sole control of the aux.

Coran hears 80's music for the first time and loses his mind. He thinks ABBA is humanity's single greatest achievement.

Lance: i have ideas about where I'm going with this but haven't really settled yet. Lance seems like the kind of boy that loves to dance (is that canon? i forgot) so most of these are Bops That Make You Move in some way or another. he likes to present an upbeat face to the world, so there's no angsting in this playlist! we are clinging to the things that make us happy with both hands until our knuckles turn white!

Keith: i'm gonna be honest. i made him a playlist but i honestly don't think he cares about music very much. it's very important to some people! he's just not one of them! i haven't cracked this playlist open in a while but i'm pretty sure it's full of songs that i think he would conceivably train/work out to.

Shiro: this playlist involves the dumbest headcanon i have for shiro that has just not left me alone since i first thought of it. most of the playlist reflects the fact that he had an emo phase in middle school (that one isn't a headcanon, you just have to look at him to know) but BUT there are a few songs on here that are on here because. little known fact. he also went through a Twilight phase that he told nobody about. (keith knows. keith was there.) he has the entire twilight soundtrack memorized. he moved past the story but the music stays forever. he used to daydream about slow dancing to Flightless Bird, American Mouth. the first time Coran mentions that they have to avoid a place because there's a supermassive black hole there, he has to bite his tongue in order to keep a straight face. do NOT ask me why i believe this so wholeheartedly.

Allura's playlist sucks right now. I think it's because in my heart of hearts i know that, were she on earth today, she would go fucking nuts for taylor swift. i have ambivalent feelings for taylor swift. i cannot do allura justice like this. if you see my vision and have recs as to what might actually fit her, PLEASE.

Klance: i haven't done it yet but i'm gonna go through this and sort it to be a sort of progression of their relationship, starting with the more combative Rivalry songs, then slipping into "oh shit oh shit" songs, then maybe ending on the more lighthearted purely romantic songs <3

(i have two songs in a shallura playlist which does not at all encapsulate how much i'm obsessed with them. the tiny cop inside my head is just constantly screaming at me that i'm going to get yelled at for liking shallura. i am going to kill the cop inside my head.)

[iamanartichoke]

Last night (well, this morning, really; it was like 3am) I slipped and fell down a Loki disk horse rabbit hole and, to be frank, I am already exhausted and season 2 hasn't even started yet. I'm not gonna lie, idk if I'm going to be able to fandom-along for season 2; I might just end up quietly watching on my own and keeping my thoughts to myself. Which - isn't as fun, really, so lol fuck me I guess.

[autistic-shaiapouf]

FINALLY bought con tickets 👁👁