always-coffee

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YIKES

Hi Jenn,

I saw a TikTok where a literary agent was showing an example of what she says when she reaches out to Barnes and Noble to ask them to host a signing event on behalf of an author she represents.

Is that something that agents typically do? I was under the impression that’s generally something handled by the publishers or even the authors themselves.

I was like "whut" so I looked it up on TikTok. I assume it was this one? If so, yeah, no. Red Flag City, tbh.

First of all, you are quite correct, agents do not typically cold call random B&N locations to book author events. In fact, if you watch that tik-tok, the reaching out by phone didn't even work -- the bookseller on the other end just gave her the email. Why didn't she just START with sending the email -- obviously they want the info by email rather than cold calling whoever happens to be at the info desk that day! But whatever.

And yes, correct, for trade published authors, events are usually set up either by the publisher or by the author themselves. (I do have a bookselling background, so I know a lot of booksellers -- I might very well give advice to my author about how to approach the bookstore, or even give an intro to an events person I know or something like that -- but it's just not the agent's job to be booking events.)

And as long as we are PARSING things: Another oddity is, she asked on that call about the store potentially "carrying the books on consignment" -- that implies that the books are not in stock in the store, nor are they easily orderable from a regular distributor that the store might work with such as Ingram. So, she's probably talking about Independently Published (self-published) books. But THAT's a little odd, because most people who self-publish don't have a literary agent for those books?

So I looked at her website. It's... interesting. The "About" page is a hot mess and clearly hasn't been copyedited, as there are repeated sections, etc. But also:

Who We Represent Independent Authors (fiction, nonfiction, YA, fantasy, sci-fi, thrillers, etc.) Screenwriters with original scripts Writer-directors with developed IP looking for adaptation support Representation is selective and by application only. We work exclusively with paying clients under our Literary Agent Service, which includes personal outreach, pitch development, and strategic planning.

So, they don't act as a literary agent in the typical sense, where an unpublished author is having them shop their work to publishers for a commission -- rather, they are taking independent authors who have already self-published, and charging them to help "adapt" or shop their work to Hollywood producers and the like. If, indeed, they are even doing that!

Because under "Storytellers" where you might expect to see, I don't know, PEOPLE THEY REPRESENT, there are none to be found, in fact, just an invitation for people to "get on the waiting list" -- Again, hastily written and not copyedited, as the Graphic Novel bit is in all the categories, even the ones that aren't about Graphic Novels. Apparently THESE Storytellers don't always believe in attention to detail!

You can, however, pay a cool $50 for the "CEO" of the "Agency" to have a one-on-one chat with you. (That, in case you were wondering, is ALSO not normal!)

#SCHMAGENT

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Long before the introduction of color film, a Russian chemist and photographer named Sergey Prokudin-Gorsky used an innovative technique. He took three individual black and white photos, each through a colored filter (red, green, and blue), to create fully colored, high-quality pictures. The photo of this woman, taken by him, is around 107 years old!

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Poetry Collection!!

Darlings, I have some brilliants news!! If you've ever wanted a poetry collection from me, you're in luck! I'm working with the AMAZING folks at CLASH Books -- Offerings for Ordinary Gods, coming summer 2026!!!

To say I am pumped is a understatement!

Let's go, baby!

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My messy boys!

loustat: we listen and we judge

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SUPERMAN. Private commission. Pencil.

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This is beautiful.

A huntress sculpture in the forest woven from willow branches

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A WHOLE damn mood.

I'll read my books and I'll drink coffee and I'll listen to music. And I'll bolt the door. - J.D. Salinger

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Daaaaaaaaaaaaamn.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/la3xpq/aita_for_telling_my_boyfriends_coworker_that_were/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

👀

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The way this made me LAUGH

The problem with having a child with an attorney that has spoken to the child like an adult since birth is that she's 4 years old and she's negotiating the order in which we're going to complete tasks as a family to best suit her idea of an ideal day.

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This is me. I'm forever BIG MAD at how much better I feel when I workout and go for a run/walk.

I am BIG MAD that I feel better when I eat healthy food I cook instead of garbage.

I am BIG MAD that sitting outside in the damn sunshine elevates my stupid mood, like the dumb, complicated houseplant I am.

I am BIG MAD I spent years fighting all of this. Damn it.

fucking hate it when the stuff everybody says "actually works" does actually work.

hate exercising and realizing i've let go of a lot of anxiety and anger because i've overturned my fight-or-flight response.

hate eating right and eating enough and eating 3 times a day and realizing i'm less anxious and i have more energy

hate journaling in my stupid notebook with my stupid bic ballpoint and realizing that i've actually started healing about something once i'm able to externalize it

hate forgiving myself hate complimenting myself more often hate treating myself with kindness hate taking a gratitude inventory hate having patience hate talking to myself gently

hate turning my little face up to the sun and taking deep breaths and looking at nature and grounding myself and realizing that i feel less burdened and more hopeful, more actually-here, that i am able to see the good sides of myself more clearly, that i am able to see not only how far i have to grow - but also how much growth i have already done & how much of my life i truly fill with light and laughter and love

horrible horrible horrible. hate it but i'm gonna do it tho

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Life goals

© Nona Limmen {via Instagram}

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Listen, it me.

one of the most challenging skills i've had to learn as an adult is the art of figuring out whether i'm proportionally annoyed with someone or just tired and overstimulated and looking for reasons to be pissed off

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Me today.

Do we have a franz kafka diary entry for july 1st, i want to know what he thinks!!!

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Red Fox/räv. Värmland, Sweden (June 23, 2025).

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"Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o'clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you've never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride."

Anthony Bourdain.

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Just a very normal night, being snuggled by my sweet gremlin of a cat, tearing up because of how much I love him.

He really is the best. He was sick the other week. And I was worried. But he’s all good now, and I am so so grateful.

(I don’t even mind that he’s preventing me from reaching my wine glass right now.)