annabird - Tumblr blog

[annabird]

In the evening sun the dragonflies come to dance

Their wings flutter

Glittering like gold in the light

Hundreds

One of every color

Just before the day gives in to night

[annabird]

It hurts until it doesn’t

That swollen piece of skin

where a hang nail used to be

It hurts

until it slowly shrinks down and disappears

Day after day

Until It looks like it did Before you nervously chewed it off

So wrapped up in a panic,

you didn’t even realize you were biting,

Leaving no sign

as to ever stinging to the touch

A deep pulsating murmur

Loudly in your ears

It hurts until it doesn’t

That heavy sinking feeling

in the pit of your stomach

pulling you to depths unknown

Listening to echos under water

Or the ache in your heart

Until one day you are in the shower shaving your legs and you are singing for the first time since

It lingers in ways you didn’t know existed

a raised scar or prickling in your numb fingers

It is in heavy eyelids

that cannot hold back tears

Strong enough to keep your eyes opening each morning

Yet too weak to block the gates

a loyal visitor, though it travels often

The in between cant last forever

You will remember their smile

Or the sun reflecting in their eyes

Miss their laughter or gentle cry

That painful longing will become of you

A distant friend

And it will hurt again

until it doesn’t

A repeating cycle

Till the very end

[annabird]

Ezra was beautiful, not in the way of looks though those around him thought so, but in the way that he loved. He fought his coding with such revere and perseverance. He surprised me most of the time. Most of all he loved Shea, till his last breath.

In thinking of the future and all that came with my assignment. I made a decision, rather I had to intervene, an impulsive tick in the back of my throat that guided me with every step against my own kind. Utterly compulsive. When I would visit him, Shea would have just snuck in through the window, the curtains still swaying slightly.

Excitement secluded them, so engrossed they were too busy to bother closing the latch to the left. Their hands and feet rushed towards each other but their fingers lingered.

They would be laying together in an embrace only seen by young love and starry nights. Clinging to each other to escape their lives.

I would watch them sleep for hours, listening to their conversations under the crocheted bed covers that Ezras mother stitched together. I would leave when appropriate, a rustling of blankets and lips. I would miss them, so much so that an ache in my chest grew, dreading what was to come for him. For they both would lose their lives.

[annabird]

It wasn’t the call of the fall, it was the flight.

Enticing as it was, I was filled regrettably with emptiness.

Weightless, when I wanted to be fulfilled.

[annabird]

She wandered to the sea

Sea foam scattered on the sand

There she stood

She wavered none

Where tides crashed into land

[annabird]

“Try to learn to breathe deeply, really to taste food when you eat, and when you sleep, really to sleep. Try as much as possible to be wholly alive with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell. And when you get angry, get good and angry. Try to be alive. You will be dead soon enough.”

— Ernest Hemingway

[annabird]

“But then it passed, as all things do.”

— Khaled Hosseini, And the Mountains Echoed

[annabird]

I am, as the novelists say, in need of seaside air

[annabird]

He said my eyes were darker than the sea when it storms.

Swallowing him whole.

He knew like the waves greeting the shore,

he couldn't help

coming back for more.

[annabird]

Part 1: The rose and slug

You could have said no when I asked

For this dance

A hint in your eyes said

You’d be lost in my trance

Engulfed in all my flames

Playing inside my fire

I encouraged all of your darkness

But was your soul that I desired

I grew stronger as you wandered

Bringing ashes to your earth

And then you couldn’t put me out

No matter how deep it hurt

Are you thirsty now or just spent?

A fragile heart bound by cement

Searching for an answer

To fill emptiness inside

Asking all the wrong questions

Ignoring all your truths

Inhaling all the chaos

Reaching higher for the moon

Praying for forgiveness

Shaking as you cry

A little hit, of something quick

To escape the reason why

Lock the door

Quiet room

Hiding out

But I can always find you

Are you thirsty now?

Lying like you always do

You finally found the water

If only a rig and spoon.

[annabird]

She danced under moonlight

And cried with the clouds

Drank water from lilies

Her feet on the ground

Slept soundly in meadows

Rose with the dawn

Never took notice

All her shadows were gone

[annabird]

♫ You can make the mountains ring Or make the angels cry Though the bird is on the wing And you may not know why… ♫

[annabird]

no, i don’t have a “dream job.” i want to spend my days reading and writing and lazing in the afternoon sun. i want to bake bread and brownies and apple crumble. i want to grow my own vegetables and plant a rainbow of flowers. i want to be with nature. i want to be at peace.

[annabird]

“You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want.”

—

[annabird]

[annabird]

How lovely it has been,

To orbit your soul

[annabird]