assbazooka

[assbazooka]

men are such funny creatures

we’re being freaky one moment, and the next he’s sending me batman the brave and the bold podcast clip reels..like buddy. i have a dildo shoved inside of me and im sending you pictures of my tits and ass. thank you however i do really enjoy those clips, theyre very funny

[assbazooka]

and then today im like “huh. havent seen Guy in a while. wonder what hes been up to” GUESS WHO CALLS THE SHOP AND IS ON THEIR WAY?

you think manifesting isnt real but the other week at work i was like “man, i wonder how mr. sex is” a guy i met ONCE. guess who the fuck shows up?

[assbazooka]

you think manifesting isnt real but the other week at work i was like “man, i wonder how mr. sex is” a guy i met ONCE. guess who the fuck shows up?

[assbazooka]

apparently we were supposed to go take passport photos today (was unaware) oops

going to college with my friend to study while she goes to class for 2 hours but im in full clown makeup wearing a bright pink calvin klein trench(?)coat, mini white gogo boots, with bright red hair, and my dad took one look at me and just sighed

[assbazooka]

going to college with my friend to study while she goes to class for 2 hours but im in full clown makeup wearing a bright pink calvin klein trench(?)coat, mini white gogo boots, with bright red hair, and my dad took one look at me and just sighed

[assbazooka]

sometimes i wish for an audience then i am reminded of the horrors and those dreams extinguish very rapidly

[assbazooka]

tumblr is the perfect social media for me cause its not really a social media it’s more like a couple bugs and maybe a prawn (bug of poseidon) huddled around a little dying plant that claims to be a prophet but is really just a dying plant

[assbazooka]

when i get Too High™️ i begin to taste the chemicals and this is only made better by eating more but this also makes it worse because sadly the More is also made of Chemicals so now i taste More Chemicals

[assbazooka]

dyed my hair red then started my period, so Yes, the carpets Do match the draped

[assbazooka]

there are 0 days until the ides of march!!!!

get him!!!!

tags:

@dorydotcom @decrepitvvitch @freaky-always @the-infamous-odysseus @atleastpleasetelephone @periwinkle-the-11th @cutebisexualmess @existencebringsonlypain @theworstcreature @aerosolsprite @wikihow2name @zaunsgreatest @raynealdo @str0ngh0ldd @midnight-blues09 @jerry-the-leech @penultimate-peril @onyx-plutos-moon @daonedaonlysk @arthurfoxy

weapons:

🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️📃🔫𐂐 🔪🪃 🦋🗡️🪡🔱 🦷🔪𐂐 🔪🗡️🍷🏏🦩🔪

[assbazooka]

monster fucking is not for the faint of heart is an unfortunate lesson i had to be taught today

[assbazooka]

axe didnt work. hammer and saw neither

hey chat tutorial on how to break down a door? please? the creature’s getting upset and i already gave her a cigarette and she has some beer but like

[assbazooka]

she’s quite unhappy

hey chat tutorial on how to break down a door? please? the creature’s getting upset and i already gave her a cigarette and she has some beer but like

[assbazooka]

hey chat tutorial on how to break down a door? please? the creature’s getting upset and i already gave her a cigarette and she has some beer but like

[assbazooka]

I giggled doing this hehe

[assbazooka]

hey so for this post i need everyone to make 1 assumption about jason todd and that is that he was circumsised okay? now bear with me. when he died and like came back and stuff, whatever. but when he was dunked in tbe lazarus pit that healed his wounds right? so would that have healed his foreskin back? would he have had to get circumcised a second time?

[assbazooka]

the other day i made the mistake of mentioning todd to father once again.

me: blah blah jason todd second robin dead—

dad: yknow robins usually eat worms, it’s not typically the other way around

me: …

me: i like jason todd, i think hes my favourite

dad, enjoyer of batman: who?

me: second robin. one who died.

me: i guess i know more about batman than you

dad: you know more about robin, sure

me: well technically hes red hood now-

dad, without skipping a beat: i think you mean worm food