awthredestim

[awthredestim]

It felt oddly natural to draw my birb as a cow.

Postie Tang is a really bad movie, and I don't think I can recommend it. Watch a highlight reel on YouTube and save yourself some time.

Jamesy: Buggo, you're always corny.

Chelicera: And you're always horny.

Jamesy: Are you saying that because of my cow horns?

Chelicera: Look at your outfit, then go to your FurAffinity page, and tell me if you see a connection. I'll wait, don't worry, I have a pamphlet here I can read while we wait.

Jamesy: They're super unrelated!

Chelicera: Right.

Jamesy: There isn't even any paws in this one! Give me a break.

Chelicera: Movie, you're uncharacteristically non-hyper-verbal.

Movie: I'm afraid, due to my outfit, anything I'll say will get censored.

Chelicera: In which way?

Movie: In a horribly offensive way.

Jamesy: What does a guy have to do to get milked around here!?

[awthredestim]

A meme to define a generation, really. Or rather a moment in time.

I miss some of those reviewers, especially Spoony.

Yeah, yeah, 2009 called and it wants it's meme back.

Isn't it weird this could've been a forgotten movie but then the internet took a hold of that one clip and it became a thing? Which is curious because outside of that, the movie's actually really bland. I wish I could say it has a lot of charisma, but sadly it doesn't.

Hulk Hogan and Christopher Lloyd may be a pretty good comedic duo, and I say that from the bottom of my heart, but they have nothing to work with. Why setting this space adventure in the middle of suburbia?

Absolute waste. I say check the clips of the highlights on YouTube and save yourself some time.

[awthredestim]

Don't say we don't follow trends in Ask Movie Slate.

I'm not the biggest fan of this series, but hey, those who like them can have them all to themselves.

This movie's great.

Remember last week when I was talking about comedies being unfunny? This is the opposite, this movie is a riot, and more interestingly, I keep finding new details each time I watch it. I've re-watched this movie about three times already, and it somehow feels different and new each time.

When it comes to 90's comedies, this is one of the best. Check it out if you haven't already.

[awthredestim]

It is pretty stupid.

This may be a bit of the artist influencing the artwork, sock-puppeting, but I don't think Movie would care much about the movie either.

Didn't they make a sequel?

It is stupid.

This whole movie is stupid, and dumb, and beyond insufferable. You've got any idea how many times you can call something unfunny before it gets tedious? I do. Seventy three times.

Also you can say all the swear words in an animated movie, that doesn't make you a grown up, at best that makes you a snot-nosed teenager.

This movie's dumb. Don't bother.

[awthredestim]

Not sure how to feel about all these trash comedies from the 90's, really.

On the one hand, they have two or three good moments, but on the other hand they have so much garbage it's practically impossible to enjoy said good bits.

Good grief, this movie has absolutely no imagination whatsoever.

Sure, some gags are funny, and to be fair Leslie Nielsen tries harder than he should, but this movie is annoying, and a travesty, and it should not be put together in the same sentence as "Airplane!" or "Hot Shots", or "Naked Gun".

Oh jeeze, that Naken Gun legacy sequel.

I'm not a happy horse.

[awthredestim]

It's a bummer this movie flopped.

This is my earliest memory of seeing a movie in the theater. I watched it in Cinemascope, which was the equivalent of IMAX at the time. It was huge.

Imagine if this had been a hit. All the other Disney sequels would've been huge animated productions instead of subpar direct-to-video dribble.

Have you ever felt so good about a movie it's almost unfair to everything else you've watched before or after?

That's this movie.

This is such a brilliant film, it feels almost unfair for the first movie. It's one of the greatest sequels ever made, it's big, it's engaging, the characters are fantastic, the writing is sharp and witty, and the action is incredible. There's no fat in this movie, it's all substance.

I'm sure you've watched it already, but you should go watch it again. Because it's brilliant, and it should be celebrated more often.

[awthredestim]

I think I've always liked characters that are white and purple coded, huh?

This movie was ok.

I don't think I was super into it, the small stakes kinda make me care a bit less about it, but it was charming enough and likeable enough that I didn't mind watching it.

Will I call it memorable? Not exactly, but it's also quite inoffensive and harmless. It's an ok family adventure movie, and I feel like it doesn't aim for anything bigger than that.

And that's OK.

[awthredestim]

Try to come up with an idea for a movie that throws seven ideas a second to your face.

Nothing beats that fucking intro, though. That is a tone setter if I've ever seen one, holyshit.

Good grief, this movie's so annoying!

I'm starting to sound like Jamesy.

No really, this movie is annoying beyond belief. Want to take an endurance test? See if you can get through the first five minutes of this movie. If you can, you may be fine for the rest of it, and perhaps for the rest of your life. If you can't handle it, better avoid this movie forever, and perhaps anything involving John Leguizamo.

I think...I think I hate John Leguizamo now. I didn't feel anything towards the guy, but now I don't think I can stand him.

[awthredestim]

"Hook" is one of those rare movies that is both a 1/10 and a 10/10 simultaneously.

Riding a perfect balance between genuinely excellent movie, and absolute guilty pleasure.

I think this hat suits me better, don't you think?

This movie is still quite alright. It's far from perfect, but it's so deeply charming I can't help but enjoy it. It's a good re-telling of Peter Pan's story, especially nuanced by the fact that the movie Spielberg right after this one was "Schindler's List".

It feels like a movie made by a director ready to leave his childhood behind.

That is until he jumped right back into it in the 2010's.

[awthredestim]

The hardest part is always coming up with an idea.

The second hardest part, is having time to draw it.

I've got to draw some more, actually x_x

Other times it's just as easy as breathing.

Did you know there's about 5 movies made every day? That's not true I just made that up. However, there were 569 movies released in 2024, that is 1.5 movies a day.

That's a lot of movies. That means you'd have to watch at least that many movies a day just to stay up to date, and with the quality of movies these days you'd have to deal with a lot of garbage.

I feel bad for those armchair critics sometimes.

[awthredestim]

I'm OK with Chicken Jockey too.

Let the kids have their movie moment, we all had one at the very least.

You'd think I'm not happy about Chicken Jocket, and the Minecraft movie, but you'd be wrong.

I love the reaction that movie's gotten. It's great that people are going to the cinema again, this is good. Sure it's a pain, it's full of popcorn and the aftermath looks like a miniature version of Woodstock '99, but it's getting asses on the seats.

I think a bit of a nuisance is worth the result of this. Think of the kids who go see this as their first movie. They're gonna be movie buffs for the rest of their lives.

Yes I'm being uncharacteristically optimistic, for once.

[awthredestim]

What's worse than a movie that's bad?

A movie that's boring.

Dial of Destiny is not bad, but it's really fucking boring, and that's perhaps an even bigger detriment. Me thinks James Mangold isn't just a good director after all. More like James Manpyrite.

You know about "Invasion of the Body Snatchers", right?

I think James Mangold has been replaced somewhere between 2019 and right now, because this isn't the same man who made "Ford V Ferrari". That movie was strong, impactful, and fun. This movie is bland, flaccid, and boring. It's supposed to be an Indiana Jones movie, but it feels closer to those Indiana Jones rip offs that came out during the early 2000's.

It's closer to "The Librarian", in fact I'd argue that The Librarian was better, at least Noah Wyle was incredibly likeable.

You don't need me to tell you to skip it, though. Nobody went to see this movie, it was a colossal flop, so of course Mangold went onto directing that Bob Dylan biopic and get nominated for an Oscar.

Give me a break.

[awthredestim]

This is me with "Jem and the Holograms", and the remake of "Alice in Wonderland".

Sometimes I wonder if I like any movies that are good.

I'm pretty sure you're all familiar with the concept of guilty pleasures, and boy howdy are these movies absolute guilty pleasures.

On the rating scale they're just pure 1/10's, total garbage, they fall apart by their (lack of)quality and inconsistencies, but the sheer joy they bring me makes them just absolute 10/10's.

Check them out, they're a riot.

[awthredestim]

Is everyone still mad at The Walking Dead?

Let me tell ya, the 2000's were rough in terms of horror movies, because it felt like 1 out of every 5 horror movies were zombie movies, and we got inevitably burnt out.

I don't miss that time.

All these alternate universe things going on, I must've missed out on it.

Then again I'm always ready to go. You surely didn't expect anything else, after doing this all these years, right? I have a whole arsenal here with me, those zombies should be scared of me, and not the other way around.

[awthredestim]

So many TV's.

This is like that scene in The Matrix Reloaded, with the Architect, except it's not annoying and purposelessly obtuse.

I mean sure, this may feel like it's right up my alley, and it does deserve a lot of praise.

This movie takes the effort to present many different styles, tones, and settings, all for the service of some silly comedic fun. Unfortunately, said comedic fun doesn't always land, which when you're supposed to do a "laugh-a-minute" movie it may ruin the momentum.

Still, it's worth watching if only because of how much stuff it does, and how much effort went into it. It's a much better take on the same concept that "Ready Player One" tried to execute.

[awthredestim]

Oh yeah.

He is hot.

Quite happy with this design for Cheli.

Jamesy: Woah, Cheli you got toe beans!

Cheli: Of course that's the first thing you notice, Jamesy.

Cotton Bucket: How did this happen!?

Cheli: I think it's because the movie subverts the audience's expectations about who's the werewolf, so this update did the same thing too!

Jamesy: Looks like you're no longer the only Part-Pupper in the crew, eh Movie? ...Movie?

Movie Slate: *gggggg*

Jamesy: Ah shit, Cheli you broke her.

Cheli: What!? How!? What did I do!?

Jamesy: You got hotter, that's what.

[awthredestim]

Movie remakes and sequels (and legacy sequels) are an unfortunate result of today's movie environment, but since this is a business they've proven to give good money in the past.

However this doesn't seem to be so anymore, what with this year's most successful movies being "Sinners" (a fully original movie), and "A Minecraft Movie" (first movie adaptation of the Minecraft video game).

So maybe this will turn out to be like 2023, and soon we may have a Barbenheimer happening.

I'm gonna put it this way.

Imagine you make a cake. And the cake turns out ok, and it's a bit wonky, but it's still a cake. Then someone says "I can make a cake like that!" but you know they can't. Will you let them try? Will you let them use all your eggs, and milk, and your kitchen, and make a total mess, and probably set the stove on fire?

You could try and help, but they won't accept the help because they know better than you.

That's the thing about modern reboots and remakes. You can't trust the people behind them, because they have no idea what they're doing. Just leave good enough alone.