chronicallysicky

[chronicallysicky]

an open letter to my body:

Bro, wtf.

[chronicallysicky]

[chronicallysicky]

Me: *gets new, and effective medication for chronic pain that I need to take once a week*

Me: oh no what if I was faking all of that for years!! Now it doesn’t hurt anymore- did it go away on its own?! Was I being too dramatic?!

Meds:

[chronicallysicky]

When tha damn period cramps get a smidge worse you gotta take a seat

[chronicallysicky]

[chronicallysicky]

Chronically ill people are not "obsessed" with our pain/symptoms any more than healthy people are "obsessed" with their appearance, job, food, hobbies, or anything else that affects them on a daily basis.

If you're tired of me talking about my illness, imagine me telling you I'm tired of hearing you talk about your work and asking why you're so obsessed with it. Ridiculous, right? Of course you're going to talk about something you do every day.

[chronicallysicky]

i will no longer be referring to my chronic illness as such. instead I will only refer to it as an UNBREAKABLE ANCESTRAL CURSE.

[chronicallysicky]

been feeling really self conscious about some of the biggest changes in my lifestyle accepting chronic illness. I remember promising so many friends I'd be in their lives again when I finally "got better" and figured out what was wrong with my body, not realizing at the time I would get a diagnosis that's lifelong. It's taken me over a year to forgive myself and the universe for what originally felt like losses to who I was, and is just now starting to feel like an important pivotal change to the person I am becoming. I just want to send a little extra love today to anyone who's on that journey too, and finds themselves feeling shame where compassion could be.

You don't owe anyone (even yourself) a specific version of yourself to be whole and happy. no hobby, career, favorite restaurant, or social standing disappearing from your life will ever diminish your value!

[chronicallysicky]

I'm super bloated since my colonoscopy on friday !! yesterday was hell on earth and today is not going much better... Eating is just worsening the bloating discomfort and I'm very constipated... I want to do a water fast tomorrow to see if it helps but I'm feeling dizzy all the time and I'm worried fasting is going to make it worse

[chronicallysicky]

i always forget how bad my endo pain is untill it happens again

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I can feel this tiredness in every inch of my body

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people who have never experienced chronic pain just really will never get it huh

[chronicallysicky]

It's okay for me to sometimes be very sad and miss the life I had before I got sick. It's okay to for me to be sad I'm never going to get better. It's alright for me to be sad that I have to settle for the few good days I have.

[chronicallysicky]

that's what crushes my soul.

people are not inviting me to things anymore. they're stopped asking if I'm fine, cause I never are. my friends are not even texting me like before anymore.

Sympathy is only for the able.

People only care that you are sick as long as you are going to get better. Once they find out it is a forever thing, their sympathy suddenly has an expiration date.

[chronicallysicky]

I miss being myself. I just don't have the energy for it anymore.

[chronicallysicky]

I wish I new more trans people with endo ❤️ it's really lonely sometimes

trans and nb ppl who suffer from endometriosis, pcos, or other chronic pelvic pains are so fucking strong 💖

[chronicallysicky]

my colonoscopy yesterday has gone well. they didn't find anything bad, just some erosions that the doctor say could have being caused by the use of anti-inflammatory, which makes sense since I take ibuprofen on a daily basis. my bleedings could have been caused by this erosions. the doctor who performed the exam said there's none endometriosis tissue inside my bowels, but this doesn't exclude the possibility of endometriosis on the outside of my intestines or in other parts of my body.

I'm excited for my next appointment with the endo specialist to show this results and also the results of my last blood test (which accused very low testosterone)