citrusdoesstuff

[citrusdoesstuff]

what's a bitch gotta do to get an ISO keyboard in the USA huh?

[citrusdoesstuff]

Lime tried yogurt drops.

I'm not familiar with how to do the image description things? But all 4 photos show a blue crowned conure with vivid green plumage in various states of eating a light pink strawberry yogurt drop that is in her beak with the first photo and then clutched in her tiny talon foot in the remaining three.

[citrusdoesstuff]

If I tell doctors I'm an organ donor and I found someone to donate my organs to, what are my chances they'll finally remove my uterus?

[citrusdoesstuff]

Unexpected item in bagging area: illusionary hot bread

[citrusdoesstuff]

Finally my feelings are words

me: hey how long is this thing going to last

someone: haha you just want to know when you’re off the hook

me: hah

me: (actually i just need to allocate the right expectations and backlog of energy and make sure the rest of my day falls in good accordance with it so that i don’t feel time-crunched and propel myself into a hysteria because if i don’t know how long this thing lasts or when it ends i can’t possibly know when literally anything else starts and my entire life becomes an unraveled realm of anarchy with no rhyme or reason and how is that not terrifying to you)

[citrusdoesstuff]

Why does Google hide stuff from me

[citrusdoesstuff]

To me, the most beautiful thing about life is that I will never know everything.

[citrusdoesstuff]

There is a room somewhere made of grey stone. It is circular, with no way in or out that I can see. I am in the center, standing at the inner point of a clockwise spiral. Another, counterclockwise spiral is above, both etched in the rock.

Lights appear. Faintly colored in pastel violet, dotting along the rounded wall. There are eight distinct points that I can make out, though the glow tends to meld and almost meander around.

A spiral pulses.

Just ever so faintly, but the tremor shivers throughout the room, amplifying it. The lights dance, and more carvings I never noticed before absorb some of their glow, shimmering in writings I can't make out.

Another pulse, and I notice the spirals also glow, creating a beam of light between, and envelop me in almost blinding energy. I wake, knowing I have never left my couch, and yet knowing I have not stayed there, either.

[citrusdoesstuff]

i've looped back around to thinking that the no-lawn movement is unilaterally a great thing

[citrusdoesstuff]

I *knew* that companies have been trying to shift blame for damage to the environment onto regular people's buying habits, but it has still somehow been a shock to research a topic and find the internet totally dominated by the narrative that "consumerism" and the desire to buy more stuff is entirely responsible for pollution and landfill waste, instead of factors such as planned obsolescence.

It's insidious—this widespread idea that average people are too greedy, and that's what fuels climate change and pollution. Not greedy companies.

"Consumers shop for clothes to stay on-trend and throw away perfectly good old clothes." "Consumers only wear clothes a few times before throwing them away." "A huge amount of landfill waste comes from clothing that consumers throw out." "Consumers replace their wardrobes arbitrarily to stay on-trend." "Consumer demand for 'fast fashion' is rising spite of the environmental impacts."

Statements like this make it sound like regular people want to buy and waste vast amounts of resources, and normal people's unchecked addiction to shopping is causing environmental devastation. It's horribly misleading when products are being deliberately designed to break or wear out within one or two years and to be impossible to repair.

Instead of "Americans are buying way more clothes than they did 20 years ago, causing lots of landfill waste!"

Where are the articles entitled "Clothing brands are selling poorly-made clothes that have to be replaced much more often than 20 years ago, causing lots of landfill waste!"

[citrusdoesstuff]

The Grove

There is a clearing in a forest where it is always night, and the moon goes through all her phases at once. Shadowy silver moonlight dances in the grove, illuminating the stark marble bench that solemnly sits in the center. Hidden amongst the towering trees are ever changing numbers of hooded figures lingering in the shadows. Present but not participating. Watching. Judging. Occasionally, animals will join. A vulture perches on a branch. The fox flits throughout the hidden brush. Spider silently weaves her web.

No matter who joins, when I am there, so is she. Though her looks may change, her energy - the stark, cold power that radiates - never does. This grove is hers, and I am ever only there by her request. The bench is large enough for two, but it is still an awkward experience to be so familiar. Still though, I sit, and try to listen to what she has to tell me.

When she speaks, even the wind quiets, and the world around me seems to melt away. Her hood never masks her face like it does with the others, and though the rest of her form may change, her eyes never do. And when she is done, she sends me off, and fades away - or rather, her thicket fades from my mind, and I am left. No longer does the cool breeze caress my face nor is there soft grass under my feet. I am instead where I was before, instead of sitting upon a surprisingly comfortable slab of stone. And I never quite know if I am happy to be back to myself again, or if I still long to bathe in moonlit shadows and a crone’s wisened words.

[citrusdoesstuff]

Buddy, when racist cunts illegally prevented me from registering to vote by just refusing to accept my papers, I PROMISE YOU shitty guilt trip memes about my inability to vote made everything worse.

You know what ACTUALLY helped?

More than every passive aggressive shit for brains on this website telling me I deserve to me racially harassed for not giving Democrats my soul?

A fucking email from a fucking HERBS AND SPICES STORE that unlike you wretched cunts ACTUALLY HAD VOTER REGISTRATION HELPLINES IN IT.

Every time one of you godforsaken freaks tells me to 'get out and vote' like its cutely trivial and didn't take months of desperate phone calls just to register (IF my registration even WORKED THIS TIME).

If you, like me, are struggling with registration or poll access, try contacting your STATE board of elections.

Request that they send you TWO copies of their registration guidelines. Collect any documents listed in them.

Then, contact your LOCAL board. Tell them you would like to register IN PERSON IF POSSIBLE.

Bring your documents and the two copies of the guideline AND a working cell phone.

If you get ANY trouble AT ALL tell the local person you will call the state board to confirm their registration requirements. Be polite, but do not leave. Put the phone on speaker.

Most of the time, the local person who is doing Actual Serious Federal And State Crimes will give up at that point. If not, the person at the state board will generally outrank and overrule the local one.

Make a note of the names of both the local and state official.

Then, and this is the most important part:

CONFIRM YOUR REGISTRATION WAS FILED.

It may take a day or two for your registration to appear.

Unfortunately, if it's been a week, you're going to have to repeat the process.

Take the names you noted previously, and contact the state board again. Report that these people denied you registration on this day, in spite of you providing these documents, then list all the required papers you collected.

The person at the state SHOULD be able to direct you from there, but the process varies hugely by state.

Good luck to you all.

[citrusdoesstuff]

Jinx says hello

[citrusdoesstuff]

if my nose keeps running can it kindly just fuck right the hell off my face

[citrusdoesstuff]

all I do are swooshes on separate layers of flame painter and then spend forever and ever like 10 minutes or whatever deciding which swooshes I like best

[citrusdoesstuff]

DNA is kinda like email in a convoluted way, based on my very limited and amateur understanding of genetics and stuff. I am absolutely only coming up with shit like this as I'm trying to go to sleep because of a conversation about reincarnation that I had with an older friend of mine, who is (or at least was) of the belief that reincarnation happens within the family tree because DNA and generational trauma and stuff

Anyway if you look back far enough it could be argued that we all share the same common ancestor(s) and therefore you could come back as a stinkbug I don't make the rules idk

But back to the email, if we take a service like Yahoo and call it DNA, with the emails themselves being genetic sequencing or whatever, that might give my friend a way to visualize things better? Like if she died, that might be the equivalent of her posting a response to an ongoing email chain, and she may want the new birth/message within that chain to be the next email she gets/life she's assigned but oops she's not got adblocker so instead it's just Yahoo advertising about politics or a new email straight into the junk folder about exotic boner drugs or whatever random ass emails people get

Also because I like this metaphor I think having a perpetually junked digital mailbox is a great way to tie in some sort of commentary about unread messages or old threads lost to time with critical info in em that you'd absolutely want to do things with but it's been about 4.5 billion years or whatever so fuck me I guess idk I'm tired

[citrusdoesstuff]

i love in fantasy when its like “king galamir the mighty golden eagle and his most trusted advisor who would never betray him, gruelworm bloodeye the treacherous”