cult-of-the-eye - Tumblr blog

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Wait shit are those weird chittering bug things another external for the OIAR???

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so could we say that shitty finance guy’s phone was bu—

his phone was b—

his phone was bugged

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If ANYTHING and I mean ANYTHING happens to Celia's child I'm rioting.

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I did everything I could. I took my brain and moulded it into cookie cutter shapes so you could look at it and laugh giddily, clapping together your sticky palms in glee. I breathed, oh how I breathed, I took in that oxygen as if it was patience and substituted carbon dioxide for harsh words. And you talk to me. You laugh with me. You tell me about your problems. And in the pulp of my brain that's sieving through my hands, you hold my thumb and bare your teeth in a grin.

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you know what I get it alice. when the lines are blurred between sibling and parent and you feel so fiercely for someone who you shouldn't have to feel so fiercely for and some days you long for a sense of normality, a hierarchy of care that makes sense to the world but other days you look at your little sibling sleeping next to you in your bed and realise you wouldn't know what to do without them. you wouldn't know who to be.

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I need samama khalid to crack so badly I want to see that man say things he can't unsay and look down at the waves crashing at the cliffs and realise he can't turn back now

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What do you think Sam felt when he was rejected from the Magnus Institute? Do you think he felt disappointed with his lack of reaction? Do you think his parents told him that he needed to work harder and he just nodded wordlessly? Do you think he doesn't understand how hard his brain tries to hang on to that letter with his name written in corporate sounding font? That all he knows is that it's not enough.

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will we get an exes to friends to enemies to friends to enemies to lovers to exes and then there isn't a word to describe what we are but it sure isn't together arc from alice and sam

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sam vagueposting online: wow uh keeping a job sure is hard isn't it

alice, appearing out of nowhere after years of no contact: loser behaviour. anyway on a completely unrelated note there's an opening at my shitty office job do you want it (please take it these people are driving me insane)

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What if Gerry knew Jon from Jon's college band days when he would go wandering at night to get away from his mother and wandered into the pub they were playing at? What if Gerry had a crush the kind of kind of gangly guy who had long, nimble fingers on strong, hands and a perpetually chapped lower lip that got caught between slightly upper teeth when he ripped out a heavy bass solo. What if Gerry was thinking about talking to him and had finally worked up the courage to do so one night but a confident black woman with a million micro braids in her bob brushed past him and greeted Jon, one hand coming up to rest on the sliver of skin peeking out between Jon's tee and the waistband of his ratty jeans? What if Gerry thought Jon was straight and, before he had time to find out Jon was available and had been looking back, Mary ruined everything by mangling herself with the skin book? What if they both recognized each other when Jon summons Gerry, mere feet away from Julia and Trevor, but neither says anything because what difference does it make? Gerry is dead and Jon might as well be his murderer.

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Heres how samalicelia can still win guys

after sam and alices conversation alice decides that because it will both fuck with sam and be extremely funny, shes gonna start flirting with both sam and celia at the same time

both of them know shes joking, sams a little annoyed by it but he "really doesn't care what she does", celias just along for the ride and thinks alice is just Like That cause of how she speaks to basically everyone at the OIAR

one by one, the three of them all realise that it might not be a joke anymore

alices flirting starts to sound more genuine, making more specific comments to the both of them, sam starts rolling his eyes less and less over it and, to his horror, starts getting flustered, celia starts playing into the jokes more and more

eventually, sam and celia have a conversation that basically goes like "i can't stop myself from getting affected by it and i know shes messing with me and that makes it worse somehow" "why dont we mess with her back then"

so sam and celia both start flirting back, to alices surprise/horror/delight/confusion

this goes on for a while, to the point where literally everyone else at the OIAR can see the obvious and the three of them can't

this then gets to the point where one day gwen has enough and goes "oh my god why don't you join their relationship at this point please just stop flirting at work" (jealous much?)

that kind of stops it for a while, none of them at all willing to address the implications of alice joining the relationship, until sam and celia have a conversation where they realise neither of them would mind having alice in their relationship

so they talk to alice about it

at first she takes the piss out of it, thinking theyre just taking the joke really far, until she realises theyre being serious

she doesnt know what to make of it at first, and theres still the doubt in her mind that theyre just making fun of her, but she knows she wants it and she bites the bullet and says yes

then they experience the horrors together as the right of passage for all podcast relationships <3

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today's "statement" is... the kind of story that season 1 jon would TEAR APART

i wanna hear jon's absolutely SCATHING commentary so fucking bad i can HEAR his (disgruntled sigh) 😂😭

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See the coffee is a metaphor, you understand, because Alice brings it to Sam, who she currently still has feelings for, and she brings coffee to Celia, who's Sam's love interest, therefore lowkey telling us Alice is trying to be fine with Sam falling in love with Celia, and she doesn't bring coffee for Gwen specifically, BUT when Gwen assumes Celia's coffee is for her, SAM IS THE ONE WHO TELLS HER IT IS, happily and cheerfully, implying that Sam is giving his blessing to Alice and Gwen's future relationship, something that neither Gwen and Alice are fully ready for at this point (hence their surprise, stilted gentleness to each other, and the argument starting ten seconds later). Meanwhile Celia is like "... I'm really fine with not having coffee rn it's chill" cementing that she's not here for a relationship at all, even if she does end up with Sam down the line.

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Chemical overreaction / compound fracture

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sam and alice have such a beautiful relationship. it is clearly a dynamic based on long term deep-seated genuine care and intimate knowledge of each other, which is why it is just so heartwarming to see that they still manage to constantly say just bordering on friendship-endingly cruel things to each other because they have matching cases of late stage foot-in-mouth disease. <3

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I'm fucking hollering. apollo socked me square in the nose with this one.