darwinquark - Tumblr blog

[darwinquark]

hahahaha my dramatic ass really did use the word tremble, didn't I?christ

[darwinquark]

Do you ever get self-doubt or imposter syndrome about your writing? I'm so in my head about everything I write not being good enough and I'm trying not to be that way, and I feel like you have a really good attitude about it on here don't take yourself super seriously but still always post really high quality stuff

oh dude all the time. I'm a neuro resident who studied bioengineering and hasn't touched a piece of actual literature in like ten years, so as you can imagine I feel like the biggest fraud on earth when I write. I read other people's writing and I'm like what on EARTH am I doing here, what could I ever offer that would hold a candle to that, you know? or I get a drop off in comments for a new chapter and my overwhelming instinct is to feel like I disappointed everyone and exposed myself as a bad writer, that's it, that's where I lost everyone. I can't speak for other people obviously but I'm not sure anyone's fully immune to that, and I think the coolest thing you can take from it (or at least that I've taken away from it) is realizing you're going to keep writing anyway. I honestly wish I was way more prolific and could write all the time, even godawful shit, because that's really the only way to figure out your style and get better, and I admire the hell out of people who have like 20+ projects they're working on at once. in fact, I actually think writing more rather than less is the best antidote to this, so just keep going babe.

in any case, sorry to ramble but yes, I feel like an imposter at all times and I think it's more common of a feeling than you think!

[darwinquark]

That's so interesting that you don't really see Cole when you write Jughead because I feel like I don't either! Is there anyone closer to what you envision?

hmmm, not perfectly? maybe like Douglas Smith because he's lanky and messy-haired and sleepy-eyed and looks like he's had insomnia for ten years

[darwinquark]

I just want you to know that canon Jughead (and Cole, for that matter) does absolutely nothing for me, especially in the time jump where he's this sloppy alcoholic writer who seems like he'd smell like cottage cheese, but somehow your sloppy alcoholic writer version of him is everything. Like he's an absolute wreck but you write him so razor sharp and warm and visceral and smart that I totally get why he's still so deep under Veronica's skin. Just wanted to shout that out because it's a true feat given the source material. Even that scene where Veronica visit his hotel room and he's supposedly this sloppy, hungover mess, I could feel the buzz. Kudos, truly!

hahahaha this reminds me of a comment someone left once on tkof that was like 'reading this story makes me forget that canon Jughead is coked out in an underground bunker wearing week-old boxers and calling himself the rat king' 💀💀💀

but gah, this means the world! so glad I could sell him as a romantic hero (anti-hero?) to you - think it's safe to say I've deviated pretty hard from the source material.

[darwinquark]

Does your jeronica fic work as a stand alone or do I have to read the prequel first? I love the idea of them as adults in New York but am not always into the high school stuff

lmao you'll def be confused by a lot, but it might work if you look at it like one of those intentionally mysterious narrative structures that starts in the middle and you have no idea what's going on until the story addresses it? not sure how much I'm going to directly rehash from the prequel but you can probably get the gist of it!

[darwinquark]

"I used to be free. I used to be free of you."

fleshed in the wife (paul/irulan), 4/6

[darwinquark]

"She glances up and finds him already staring back at her. She blinks, reminded, suddenly, of the twelve tequila shots and red-eye flight clinging to her like a stomach flu. It shouldn't matter. She tells herself it doesn't.

She bites her lip to pull some color into it anyway."

vs.

"He stiffens a little, more aware, suddenly, of the ratty undershirt and boxers he's been in this whole time. He forces himself to ignore her scrutiny. Blocks out the destructive impulse to wonder what she's thinking, if she's still attracted to him—to go down the rabbit hole of questioning if she ever even really was or if it was just the game of him that appealed to her back then."

This parallel between chapter 1 and chapter 3 does something to me! They're both trying so hard not to care what the other thinks and yet!!!!

Please tell us chapter four is on the way!

hahahaha I think this says more about me being a redundant writer than anything but I will absolutely take intentional parallel! yeah, I think both of them are still in that phase where they're running off assumptions about each other and reacting to what they think the other is thinking, but deep down are starving to know what's actually going on in the other's head. I think that's why the end of the latest chapter is such a physical boilover, because it's them communicating in actions what they can't bring themselves say.

[darwinquark]

Jane Fonda and long time gal friend Lily Tomlin for T: The New York Times Style Magazine, Culture issue in an interview with Ella Riley Adams to reflect on the first time they worked together, and how their partnerships have, even in the face of creative differences and personal spats, endured.

[darwinquark]

The degree in playing with emotions... where can I find my one to be a buffer?

Dear oh dear they're a mess. (love them for it tho)

lmao for what it's worth, this is for sure the worst of it for a while

next chapter is actually the first step toward their dair era - just needed things to boil over before they could settle

[darwinquark]

not Jughead getting all heated about Clay only to end up hooking up with Veronica in the alley I can't 💀💀💀💀 he is SUCH A MESS and I'm living for it

isn't he so stupid

those morally bankrupt things are only okay if HE does them, alright?

I honestly laughed when I wrote the line that was like 'you talk a big game jones but you're a dog like the rest of us' cause honestly???? true!

[darwinquark]

He wants to embed into her. He wants to make her swallow him. Wants to lodge in her throat the way she's been lodged in his for the past five years, making it hard to talk, to fucking breathe. | WBBS, chapter three is up!

[darwinquark]

Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961)

[darwinquark]

YES I'm so excited for insufferable anarchist Jughead and getting to see his lighter side! though I'm assuming we're still going to get quite a bit of angst along the way because you hate us

lmao yeah just a little angst

[darwinquark]

I don’t know why, but I can’t stop imagining that Veronica had a relationship with a man older than her, not a big age gap but it is something. I don’t know, maybe for an untreated electra complex. And maybe cause she felt she doesn’t capable to had relationships with a boys that had the same age. Like she had stilled tied to jug but she didn’t want admitted it and in the same time she really can’t ignored it. I don’t think what I write makes a logical sense. I’m sorry ahaha

and I’m sorry for my mistake, I hope the message is understandable. I hope also you have a beautiful weekend❤️

ooo, I can definitely see that! I haven't thought too much about her dating life outside of her not really sustaining anything serious with anyone because she's so career-focused, but that would probably check out. it's funny that you say that though because I always had it in my head that jughead has a thing with a much older woman in college, like a professor or some mentor equivalent.

probably for a similar reason!

[darwinquark]

"I want to hear you say it." It's an abrupt demand and she falters. "What?" "I want you to admit out loud that you never gave a shit about me," he presses on, drunk, impulsive, "that it was all just a distraction for you." "Don't be ridiculous, Jughead." His arms shoot up as she makes to turn away, boxing her against the brick wall. "Say it, Veronica." He's irrationally fixated on her mouth, on the choreography of it forming the words that had only ever been implied before. Needing to see them. Needing to hear them Coldly and without remorse.

read here: x

[darwinquark]

Pride & Prejudice (2005) dir. Joe Wright

[darwinquark]

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE (2005) dir. Joe Wright