daydreamcinemas - Tumblr blog

[daydreamcinemas]

Untitled words by yours truly..

This poem has sat in my notes for months now, I’m just glad it’s out now.

Enjoy🌹

-Dillon

[daydreamcinemas]

You know, it’s pretty amazing what you can accomplish in one day of calling out “sick” from work. Here’s a collection of photos & moments Me, Myself & I captured on a much needed personal day..

Enjoy(:

-Dillon

[daydreamcinemas]

This day originally wasn’t too interesting as far as Jakob & I had agenda wise. I hopped in his car & We drove around endlessly all afternoon throughout numerous business centers in Irvine & other local areas to find some new street spots we could skate, but only to waste gas driving through uneventful & lame parking lots & some tightly secured parking structures. Lake Forest used to have plenty of abundent spots to skate, & while theres a handful of random spots availble to still sesh, nothing seems satisfactory enough as most legendary spots have been renovated or knobbed.. It’s lame.

But, after wandering around aimlessly, we ended up just having a good ol’ fashioned school sesh at one of our local elementary schools we used to fuck around at back in middle school. Small fences make for easy hopping & with decent blacktop & skateable lunchtables, it’s all you really need besides your board of course. Throw in a couple of joints & add some feral playground balls & the inner child within can’t help but make out a good time. For such a casual & chill session, I managed to film some awesome lines for Jakob & take some pretty solid photos which always makes for a solid day. It’s always the little things that add up..

-Dillon

[daydreamcinemas]

Touch the Copper Pot of water, & it boils.

Flick the tip of a cigarette, it lights.

Take a drag..

Pinch the candle’s wick & watch it ignite,

Mmm.. Spiced Cider enchants the air.

A back hand’s braise to a branches bundle &

The Pyro’s flames dance with desire,

Feelings flickering, embers whisper.

As if the Sun sat before me in a scarlet dress

Your beauty burns red & my gaze glows solar.

Have a sip of my iced coffee please..

I’d prefer it hot.

On the contrary, please do more of

Everything else & inbetween,

I am a moth to your flame.

** Sidenote: These particular words came together after remembering a specific scene from Billy Madison, “Soooo HOT, want to touch the Hiney.. AAHHRRROOOOO!!”. I guess I really liked the idea of describing someone so damn attractive, “Hot”, & how I could literally make them a literal purveyor of heat. I don’t know, it sounded sexy & fun & this is what I got from that..**

-Dillon

[daydreamcinemas]

To the Lone Wolf behind the counter of Grab-N-Go, thank you for staying open endlessly, day after day, specifically a night of a holiday like this. Hardly anyone else on the road, the city is quiet & gathered comfortably amongst their families as the rain trickles down into the night. It’s weird thinking I was here at 10 on the dot when I took this, just me, pump #6, & a vacant lot accompanied by complete silence. Bright lights & mirrors of water paint the asphalt. Rainy nights make for the best for photos. To think I was only here because my gas light came on right as I left my sister’s place, & with only $8 in my pocket I knew it’d still put something in my tank to putt me around to work & back, luckily this place has the cheapest gas around so the two gallons I managed to squeeze into my tank are my flammable holy water until my first check finally comes next week. So, to the Lone Wolf running the show at Grab-N-Go, I hope you had an eventful day with your family, wether or not you celebrate such a holiday or not, & I appreciate your inconveniently convenient hours of operation. I know I already mentioned to you at the register as I left but, Happy Thanksgiving.

“A little bit of somethin’ is always better than nothin” -Harriet Tubman

^ **Okay I know she never actually said that, but it’s fun & funny to misquote people throughout history, try it sometime.**

-Dillon



[daydreamcinemas]

This day.. oh yeah, an experience I’ll be grateful for indefinetly. Aesthetic Pleasure & Eyelid Movies. Art History & a Vacant Sofa, thoughtful words & stars sharing the night sky above. Silence & admiration sat back to back & togetherness was the root of our foundation. It was all new to me, more foreign than the centuries worth of European Artwork that adorned J. Paul Getty’s walls. I am heavily grateful & oh so certain of my luck in finding gems in strange moments in my life. It’s a pretty cool super power If you ask me. I have many more a word I can paint in the air about this specific Saturday, an entire Daydream Cinema if you will, but I’ll leave the rest to unfold for myself. I’m glad & most grateful I had this this day with you, this is a moment. This is art. This is my appreciation.

[daydreamcinemas]

[daydreamcinemas]

Great opener right? Yeah.. I know, it literally works in any social situation everytime. But anyways, fuck all that. Hi, hello & welcome to you. Yeah, You. Peering into a little rectangular glass window of cyberspace more likely than not, reading through these itty bitty words & taking in the atmosphere of this night shot n’ such. What you’re actually acknowledging & trying to understand probably is, “who made this?” & why? This photo, the colors, these words & fonts. I mean how stressful of thoughts those must sound right?! & what of it? All of this, Like.. Define the purpose of one instance where someone asked for all that you or I ever intend to post, create or think & why. It’s impossible, & yet.. we believe in this ideology so strongly. To be expected to present yourself in a manner specific to someone else’s Ideal Image of you, just to satisfy a personal opinion or belief of their own, whatever’s right or wrong or whatever’s “Cool”, But.. Why?!

We all want to be so much of one very specific thing.. Ourselves. You see, everything that induces passion, creativity & curiosity is what centers our gravity & maintains our inner balance. We are happy, indefinitely. But, everything else on the other hand, outside this center of gravity, carries with it a different kind of energy. Something that’s easy to tap into, but very hard to ignore. It’s relentless in that these thoughts & feelings always mingle their way around our cycle of free thoughts & feelings. These Judgements. A buncha “what if’s?” & “what will they all think?” Worry. Guilt. & worst of all, constant thoughts of “not deserving enough”. It’s Shitty. Like honestly, it’s probably one of the shittiest feelings ever besides heartbreak or gnarly diarrhea. not feeling like you can be yourself, open or expressive. I mean what is the purpose of being any other way. To feel comfortable? Wanted? Loved even?! How strange it all is when you take a step back & stumble on your ass a bit. Hurts a little don’t it?

Well, I myself used to think & operate most of my entire life to this degree as many people still do, Because I thought I had to. Really. I mean if you want to throw in that I had a rather confusing childhood in terms of always feeling I had to “choose between family” & figure out what I needed to do to please everyone & make everyone else happy, for it would eventually make me feel happy. That maybe, I’ll finally feel accepted, But.. that was a very false belief. For many reasons than one, I’ve always put myself in a position to serve others & provide. That’s a key word, Provide. I thought if I was to have any “real” purpose to those around me, It would be that I had to be producing or I needed to provide something to fulfill a need, someone else’s void.. never my own. School, work, my last relationship, I’m sure I can think of plenty of other instances but you get the idea. But the truth is, as much as I do enjoy being there for people & those closest to me, I’ve never felt I’d truly ever been there enough for Myself. Now, that’s honestly a rather sad but very true feeling I’ve literally just acknowledged within myself just now. Emotions, feelings, you really can’t fake this stuff. I started typing this out at about 8:40ish last night. It’s now 2:52 AM & I just waltzed downstairs to chug two glasses of water. I feel amazing now. Also early AM hours tend to brew some hot tea up in my mind. *& I don’t mean gossip really, well inner gossip I guess, But back to more of me, myself & I, Yes?* Most of my life I’ve lived helping tell plenty of others stories & paint a contemporary image that is their lives. Abstract elements making up an intricate image while strong & consise colors & patterns structure a cement foundation of identity. You. You are literally art. & MY purpose is. Art.

It’s literally what I live for, in every aspect concievable. Just as I described someone elses life story & image as a painting, that same way of thinking has projected itself into every notion & intention of my being. Observing, analyzing, collecting & examing all these patterns before our very eyes. Infact, Close your eyes for a brief moment will ya? Take a deep breath through your nose.. & exhale. Continue this breathing exercise ** I haven’t told you to open your eyes yet so read the rest telepathically or just smile & nod your head as if you did any of this** Now, take in everything that is right there for you in this moment, in that strange darkness where your eyes are closed & it’s almost pitch black but there’s like a red-orangeish kinda glow around your eye sockets still & you can sorta see those little membrane-ish things floating around in your eyeballs if you really focus enough.. yeah, don’t focus on that shit right now. Dive into the deep space of your mind, extract those imaginative thoughts, wring out the spectrum of colors submerged within your thought patterns. Playback the tapes to your favorite memories, kickback a bit & throw on some movies from your childhood. Using the map in your mind, visit that secret spot of yours, all the foreign countries & destinations you desire. Get inspired. Wear the clothes you’ve always wanted & design your lifestyle from within. & while you’re in there still, flip through the soundtracks of dreams you’ve stored away. Like a jukebox waiting to be played. You’ve selected & now patiently wait for it to kick on. It slides itself into a precisly placed turntable & a lever whirrs over the spinning disc & ever so gently, lowers its arm down. Like a surgeon making the first precise incision, the needle makes contact with the slighty trembling surface.. a soft scratch & a crackle break the silence, & your dream is awakened. Listen to it, feel it resonate with your soul.. Reach out to it. It’s yours & yours only, no one elses, nothing else in existence can ever harness this but you. Collect it. See it, envision & become. You got it? Beautiful. Now, open your eyes. I imagine that took much less than a minute or two to unfold, hopefully you remembered to breathe after those first couple steps, after all this isn’t “Simon Says” or anything. But moments like that, every last bit of it, That is my purpose of being. To live out these vivid dreams & illustrate what they mean to me, what they convey. It’s all aesthetic pleasure & esctacy. All merging into one costantly evolving, living, loving piece of art. These eyelid movies, these stories & images that exist nowhere else but the tide pools of our imagination. The roughest of seas, the vast plains of our mindfield, the alternate reality within. Using this source of infinite inspiration, I yearn to publish my first book soon, have an art exhibit at a gallery in the near future, travel & experience every place I can, all of the world’s nooks & crannies. I want to find someone who enjoys me for all that I am & reciprocate authentic love back at the same frequency. I want to help my friends & others with their dreams & aspirations, share their stories. I want to tell my own story. & to be honest, I believe this “blog”, may be my first time dipping my toes in this ocean. Unsettling & frightening yes, but for all of the right reasons. I’m inspired to finally live & be Myself in every aspect, to the fullest degree.

I just don’t care about the bad shit anymore, the “what if?” Or what anyone else thinks. I’m unconventional in every sense of my being. I seek out truth & compassion, you know.. genuine feelings, no bullshit, Transparency is my shade of grey, but I’ll be happy to display my full array of color. & sure, I’ll wait paitiently for all of the right things for me to blossom, but don’t doubt my ability to manifest what I truly want & believe I’ll make possible for myself.. you will be endlessly dissapointed. I guess you can look at this as an elaborate way of me saying that I’m starting a personal blog & I’m posting whatever the fuck I feel like & by sharing myself, I hope to inspire others to share & be more of who they really are. If you’ve managed to read along this far, do me a favor. Reach over your right shoulder & give yourself a pat on the back, you’re doing just fine. Now, being that I’ve spilled all these thoughts into words finally, I welcome you to my page whole heartedly. I’d love to hear your feedback, stories, anything that inspires you, your passions, whatever that drives you, please share it, & I’ll share myself. I look forward to hearing from any of you & thank you for any time you spent reading any bit of this & being interested in coming along this journey. You are deeply appreciated. Ugh, I have to to be up for work in less than 3 hours so if you’ll so kindly excuse me.. I’ve got some sleep to catch up on...

-Dillon

[daydreamcinemas]

Please visit this space later for more context. It is 12:55 AM & I am very, Very Stoned.. & tired. Incentive? I promise I’m a little bit interesting..

*btw I originally made this profile like 2 years ago & never told anyone & never even made a post on here. Ever. I have no idea what I’m doing & I’m okay with that*

Go to Bed.