ddreammcatcher

[ddreammcatcher]

I’m so tired. Everything’s exhausting. I hardly enjoy my hobbies anymore. It feels like no one cares. What’s the point? What’s the point of staying? Im so fucking tired of everything.

[ddreammcatcher]

eveeyones got it wrong your mid 20s arent for going to the club or partying or picking up new crafts. your 20s are for discovering how much more autistic you are than you thought you were in high school

[ddreammcatcher]

[ddreammcatcher]

[ddreammcatcher]

I didn’t think I’d make it to 18 and now I’m 25. So many emotions. I have a job a love, more financial stability than I’ve ever had, and my mental illness is under control. I’m proud of myself.

[ddreammcatcher]

I made it. Three years with no self harm. Idk how to feel. The anniversary is hard. It’s bringing things up. So much has changed since then. I’m so proud of myself. I’ve grown and changed so much.

[ddreammcatcher]

[ddreammcatcher]

he does, I completely agree

(+ I hc that Spencer stress-knits sad sweaters)

[ddreammcatcher]

I don't think fic writers know how much they matter

Do you know how many times you distracted me when I was hurt or lonely? Do you know how many times a line or a scene from fanfic marked me so much that I remembered years later, even though I can’t recall my own phone number? 

Even if the fic isn’t perfect or popular or multi-chaptered… Sometimes there’s just one sentence that changed me.

You, miles and miles away, changed me.

[ddreammcatcher]

100 good questions to ask your friends at 4:02 am when you can’t sleep (can also function as an asks list)

Are you bothered by your cosmic insignificance?

Do you mourn for a place or person you’ve never known?

Do you really think there is somebody for everybody?

Do you place any value in gender roles?

Do you have to be related to be family?

Are your platonic relationships just as valuable as romantic or family ones?

Are you in love? Do you want to be?

Do you think you can put love into categories (family, platonic, romantic, etc.) or is it just one general sensation?

Would you be happy with a life without romance? 

Are you always going to be a little in love with somebody?

Would you change your appearance if you could?

Do you have the feeling you’ve lost something you might have had in another life - whether it be a person, a place, a world, a language, etc.?

Do you believe in reincarnation?

Would you want to be reincarnated?

Do you think you’re special, or just another person amongst billions? Can you be both?

Do theoretical ethical debates have any value? Is it important people discuss ethical dilemmas, e.g. the trolley problem?

Did you have imaginary friends? Do you still have them?

Are you religious? Do you think your religion is ‘correct’?

If you aren’t religious, do you wish you were? Why?

Do you want a grand adventure?

Do you have somebody, whether it be a friend or stranger, who you think you could have loved if the circumstances were different?

How long does it take you to fall in love with somebody?Is the sensation of ‘falling in love’ or ‘being in love’ better?

Is love about convenience or something more? Can it be about both?

Do you think you really understand your gender and sexuality?

How fluid is your concept of gender and sexuality?

What’s the most life-changing choice you’ve made so far?

Are you afraid of growing old?

Would you want to live forever? How about for a billion years, a million, a millennium, a century?

Do you believe in some form of god/s?

Are your choices fated or of your own free will?

Do you have a hunch about how you’re going to die?

Do you believe in star signs?

How old do you have to be to be considered an adult?

Was your childhood happy?

What are you missing from your life?

Have you ever met someone who had a very similar personality to your own? Did you get along?

Do opposites attract?

Is your life what you expected it would be five years ago?

Do you know what you want out of life?

What makes a person ‘good’? Are you a ‘good person’?

What fundamentally matters do you?

Is freewill an illusion?

Do you create art? How do you define art?

How often do you lie? Is all lying inherently bad? Are you generally truthful?

Do you want to be remembered after your death? What for?

Is true world peace ever possible?

Do you have to suffer to truly understand the human condition? What is the human condition? How can you really experience it?

Are you free? Will you ever be? Can anyone be truly free?

Do you hold yourself to higher standards than you hold others?

What do you expect from a friend or partner?

What question could you ask to find out the most about a person?

Do you justify all your beliefs or have you just inherited/absorbed some?

Which beliefs do you have that is most likely to be wrong?

Can human really understand the complete nature of the universe, space and time?

Is a conscious what makes someone a person?

What do you think about artificial intelligence?

Do you thinks humans are obsessed with escapism (books, video games, movies, etc.)? Are you looking for an escape? Do you think that’s a bad thing?

Are we eventually going to ‘run out’ of new combinations for music, art, language, etc.? Is there a limit to human creativity?

What do you think the next era of music will be like?

What do you think the next era of fashion will be like?

Do we live in tumultuous times, or do they just seem so strange because we’re living in them?

Would you want to meet a clone of yourself? Would you like them?

How confident are you, really?

How consistent is your perception of time?

What age should people be allowed to vote? Should children and teenagers be allowed to vote?

How do you feel about the idea ‘an eye for an eye’?

What’s the worse thing a person can be?

How do you feel about monogamy?

Can you be in love with someone and still fall in love with someone else?

What’s the tragedy of your life?

Would your life make a good play?

Should people be prosecuted for crimes that weren’t considered crimes at the time?

Would you fight for your country? Do you feel a sense of loyalty to your nation?

Do you believe in gender equality in every aspect?

Do we have a moral obligation to care for others? To what extent?

Do you crave approval and/or praise?

Is there comedy in all tragedy and tragedy in all comedy?

Are you ever going to be satisfied?

When you are sad, do you listen to music that conveys your emotions or music that makes you happy?

Is your music organised by mood or sensation or do you just listen to everything at any time?

Would you marry a friend if they needed you to (e.g. for citizenship)?

Are you a deep person?

Given the chance to live your life on Mars, with no hope of returning to Earth but with the promise of scientific discovery and glory, would you take it?

Are you who people think you are?

Do you think you would be happier if you had been born a different gender, sexuality, race, ethnicity, nationality or religion?

What’s your toxic trait? Are you trying to improve yourself and fix it?

Do you anger easily?

Are you a jealous person?

If you lost all your memories, would you have the same personality?

Given the chance to reset your life (with none of the knowledge you currently have), would you take it?

Is hate as strong as love? Who do you hate?

Do you speak multiple languages? Which do you dream in? What language would you want to learn?

Do you draw meaning from your dreams, or do you disregard them?

How would you describe yourself when you love? Do you love forcefully, unconditionally, gently, quietly, desperately?

Is unrequited love real love?

Is your perception of yourself similar or the same to how others perceive you?

Are you overly analytical?

Do you ever feel that you are really a terrible person, and only act good out of societal or some other obligation?

Do you believe in magic? Are you superstitious?

What belief do you have that isn’t logically grounded, but you still firmly believe in?

[ddreammcatcher]

oh u have a gender? how quaint

[ddreammcatcher]

@positiveseed

INSTAGRAM

[ddreammcatcher]

[ddreammcatcher]

Anger can be an advantageous emotion but being mean is just useless and exhausting

[ddreammcatcher]

@cmbingo

Criminal minds bingo 2021

Board

BAU Corporations  part 1  part 2

Olden times JJxArron, DerekxEmily

Spin the bottle JJxElle

Performance time Spencer reid

[ddreammcatcher]

Performance  time

This fills my bull pen square for @cmbingo 

I’m excited for tonight. Spencer is coming to see my band perform. He hasn’t been to any of my shows yet. The two of us met six months ago. Savannah, my cousin, dragged me to a night at the bar with her boyfriend's team. I spent the first part of the night not really talking to anyone. They tried to include me in the conversation, but I felt awkward and out of place until Spencer started talking to me. Within minutes, I had relaxed and was joining the conversation. At the end of the night, we exchanged phone numbers. I didn’t expect it to go anywhere, but I’m so lucky that it did.

Spencer texts me to say he let Derek drag him to see my band. I laugh. We’ve kept it on the down low for now. I haven’t even told Savannah about us. I know that if I did, she would tell Derek and he would tell the rest of the team. I text him back telling him I can’t wait to see him. He just got back from a case and I haven’t seen him in almost a week. I miss him when he’s gone, but I understand he won’t give up his job for anything. 

My band mate walks up to me. “What’s got you in such a good mood?” He asks with a smile. “My boyfriends coming tonight. He hasn’t heard us play yet.” I say excitedly. He chuckles. “How come I’ve never heard of him before?” He asks. I blush. “We wanted to keep it quiet so his team didn’t find out.” I say. “Well, I look forward to meeting him. I haven’t seen you this happy in a while.” He says. “Thanks.” 

My phone buzzes. Spencer and his team are here. I smile, ready to meet his team. We play our usual set. It goes well. I have butterflies the entire time, which I’m not used to. As we end the set, I catch Spencer’s eye. He has so much admiration in them. I have a smile on my face that I can’t get rid of. 

We head backstage. After ten minutes of starting to pack up, Savannah walks in. “Hey y/n, that was amazing like always.” She says with a smile. “Thanks Savannah. I saw you brought Derek and his team with.” I say as if I don’t care. She smiles and nods. “They want to meet you again.” She says. “Okay, I’ll be out in a little bit.” After she leaves, my band mate walks up to me and tells me that they can finish packing up and I can go see my boyfriend. 

I walk out towards Savannah. She gets up and leads me to the team. When I get there, she introduces me to the team. I take a seat between Spencer and Derek. Derek smiles at me and tells me he enjoyed the show. After 20 minutes of talking, I decide it’s time to let the team know about us. I text Spencer and ask if he’s ready. He replies yes. 

Derek decides that it’s time to make me uncomfortable. “So y/n, do you have a boyfriend?” Savannah hits him. “Derek, be nice” she says. “Actually I do.” I say. Even though we agreed to tell them, I’m not going to make it easy for Derek. Spencer is watching with a small smile. “Who is he?” Derek asks, being nosy. “It’s none of your business.” I say. “Fine. Whoever he is, he’s a lucky man.” Derek says. I just nod.

We go back to the conversation we were having about food and alcohol. In the next hour, I slowly move my chair closer to Spencer. No one seems to notice me do it, or if they do, they don’t say anything. It takes another half hour, but it gets to the point that I’m leaning against Spencer. He looks down and gives me a smile. I can see how happy he is. The moment between us is cut short. Derek, who had been only paying attention to Savannah the past half hour suddenly looks at us. The rest of the team has been talking among themselves.

Derek gives us a curious look. “Spencer, why are you letting her lean on you? You don’t like physical touch usually.” The entire team is now looking at us. I glance at Spencer, suddenly shy. Spencer looks at me and it helps me calm down. Savannah looks at me. “I didn’t think the two of you knew each other.” She said. 

I smile at her. “Yeah, he happens to be my boyfriend. Who wants a refill?” The whole team looks at me and Spencer. “It’s about time kid.” Derek says. They all smile at me. I’m so glad that we finally told them. They all congratulate me for finally getting Spencer to spend time with someone other than the team. “How did you meet? Rossi asks. “Savannah dragged me to one of your nights out. We talked a little bit then. We’ve been texting and seeing each other for a while now.” I say with a smile. Rossi buys us all drinks to celebrate Spencer getting a girlfriend.

“Why are we celebrating?” I ask Spencer. He chuckles. “They never thought that I would find anyone to date. I actually think they had a pool going.” I giggle. On cue, Hotch holds out his hand. Everyone grumbles and hands over money. “You couldn’t have waited another week?” Emily says annoyed. “When did this start?” I ask. “About a year ago. We went out one night without Spencer and Derek said that he would never find anyone. We decided to place a bet on how long it would take. I chose yesterday. Emily chose next Monday.” Hotch says. I laugh at their antics. I’m so happy to be his girlfriend. I love being around him. Meeting his team showed me how loved he is by them. I’m so glad that I’m in his life and he’s in mine

[ddreammcatcher]

Spin the bottle

This fills my JJ/Elle square for @cmbingo The team is in for an interesting night at Rossi’s.

It’s one of those nights that we are all hanging out at Rossi’s. We’ve all had a hard week and it’s nice to just relax. I glance across the room to Elle, who is my girlfriend. We agreed to keep it a secret for now. What I really want to do is go make out with her, but I can’t. She smiles at me, making me want her more.

Rossi walks into the room at that point. “I have alcohol.” He says. We all reach for it at the same time. After a couple of hours, we have all relaxed completely with help from the alcohol. “We should play spin the bottle.” I hear myself saying. “JJ, aren’t we a little old for that?” Spencer asks. 

I chuckle and mess with Spencer’s hair. “We are never too old for spin the bottle.” I say. After about ten minutes, everyone except Spencer has agreed to play. We sit in a circle on the floor. We are all talking excitedly to each other. “Quiet people.” I say hyped for the game to get started. “When it lands on you, you can choose truth, dare, or kiss. It’s up to you.” I say.

I spin it to start and it lands on Hotch. He says dare and we decide to blind fold him until it lands on him again. After that, it lands on Elle. She gets up and walks over to me. She tilts my head up and gives me a gentle kiss. Rossi and Derek whistle. I blush. 

We continue the game for a while. At some point, Elle decided to annoy me. Every time it landed on her, she kissed someone different. It’s starting to piss me off. I just want to kiss and make out with her and instead she's teasing me. It lands on me next. I choose kiss. I walk over to Elle and crash my lips on hers. It’s not a gentle kiss. It’s passionate and deep. When I finally pull away, everyone else is looking at us. I lean down and whisper in her ear “Mine.” 

I walk back over and sit down without saying a word. Both of us are still trying to catch our breaths. I’m not usually the possessive one, but right now I just want her for myself. She has a huge smile on her face. “JJ, what was that about?” Spence asks since he's the only one with a clear head. “She’s my girlfriend and it was annoying me that she was kissing other people.” Elle blushes when I say that. “JJ, we agreed to keep it a secret!” She says with a laugh. At that point, everyone is giggling. 

For the rest of the night, I sit next to Elle. I cuddle her and drop kisses on her lips at random times. None of us are sober enough to drive, so we all crash at Rossi’s for the night. I cuddle up to Elle and fall asleep quickly. 

The next morning, I wake up curled around a sleeping Elle. I get up to go find aspirin. I have a headache from last night. I walk into the kitchen to find Rossi, Hotch, and Spencer sitting at the table. “Good morning. Rossi, please tell me you have aspirin somewhere?” I say. He tosses me a bottle. “So JJ, how long have you been seeing Elle?” Spencer asks. “Fuck. Did I really kiss her possessively last night?” I’m screwed. “Yeah, you did.” Spencer says. Rossi laughs and Hotch looks surprised. “How much do you remember about last night Hotch?” “Um, not much after we decided to play truth or dare.” He says. I sigh.

Elle, Derek, and Penelope walk into the kitchen at that point. “Elle, Spencer and Rossi remember last night, but Hotch doesn’t. Sadly we have to tell them again.” I say sadly. She laughs. Derek and Penelope are both confused. “JJ and I are dating. She kinda made out with me last night during truth or dare.” Elle says. I blush and hide my head in my hands. “This is so embarrassing.” I mumble. Elle walks over, pulls my hands away, and kisses me. “I’m not embarrassed. It just means I can kiss you when I want.” I kiss her passionately, glad that I can kiss her whenever now.