deadreality404

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Imagine your GOAT's name being L..

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Unrealistic

I have a lot of reasons why I want to improve my art. But the most dumbest, the most unrealistic and Icarus soring into the sun like a suicidal moth level of audacious and foolish reason that I want to improve my drawing skills is because I want to be able to remake death note.

LIKE I SERIOUSLY FANTASISE ABOUT REANIMATING THIS SERIES MYSELF. BY. HAND.

Don't get me wrong. I think the original anime is FANTASTIC. For example the potato chip scene and a lot of other scenes in the show that I don't feel like naming right now. Tetsuro Araki (who I think is the one who directed a lot of death note, I think, I'm not completely sure if he was the only one or if there were others) did some really amazing things with the camera angle and sequence of shots and he must be applauded for his work cuz those scenes were FUN and a large reason for why I love this series a lot. (I watched the anime before I came in contact with the manga and I had already been spoiled for a lot of the series but scenes like those were part of what kept me watching the show anyway)

BUT! BUT! BUT!

Sometimes I'm watching the show and I'll pause and I'll see...

and the like. AND I KNOW THAT'S BECAUSE THAT JUST KIND OF HOW ANIME WAS BACK THEN. Animation wasn't that advanced and the animators had to cut corners where ever they could. And this isn't the greatest example I could use but you knowwww

But what if that wasn't the case. What if some crazy dude worked on the animation instead of people with actual lives.

And what if that crazy dude was ME. What if I went insane and did this? Would I be committing a crime?

I think I'd certainly be wasting my time but I'd be proud of myself for it!

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Light Yagami Suffering

Woke up with the taste of blood in my mouth. Now I wanna read about Light Yagami getting tortured.

T.W:

Descriptions of TORTURE under the cut. Not necessarily explicit but NOT something I'd consider SFW so proceed with caution.

Just imagine it. Light tied up in a chair. Frantic. Struggling. Light panicking and feeling humiliated. Imagine him twisting and tying himself into knots inside his head so that his current helplessness doesn’t conflict with his god complex. Light threatening, demanding. ‘Don’t you know who I am? I’m the son of the chief of police. You won’t get away with this!’ Light getting water boarded. Light thrashing. Light getting his nails ripped out. Light biting back screams. Light gasping and panting and when his control finally slips – whimpering like a beaten dog. Light trying to negotiate. ‘If you let me go I won’t tell anyone. I promise damn it! I swear it! I won’t say a god damn word! What do you want from me?!’ Light’s composer finally breaking. Tears pooling in his eyes seconds before he first starts to sob. Light’s pride shattering, him begging. ‘Stop! Stop! Please…’

Then finally, when Light reaches his lowest, L appearing before him. Gently carding his fingers through Light’s damp hair. ‘It’s okay Light-kun. It’s okay.’ Light feeling relived. Thinking that it’s finally over. Then his brilliant mind puts the pieces together.

L is alone. Light is still tied up. The one doing this to him never revealed themselves. The glee on L’s face….

‘You…’ Light doesn’t want to believe it.

‘Does Light-kun have any idea how pretty he looks when he cries?’

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Curiosity

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Light and Misa

On the topic of Light and Misa's relationship after L dies.

A part of me finds it funny how the two people in the entire cast of death note who would be the least likely to admit that they are miserable with their lives come to live together.

It's sad, yes, but it's also funny in the way sad things are sometimes.

Like you have Light, who is miserable because he has doomed himself to a life of boredom once again after killing L. Except this time it's worse because now he knows what it's like to not be in ennui. Now he knows what it's like to have someone that thinks on the same wavelength as him and to face off against them and he will never be able to experience that high ever again because the one who gave him that high is dead. L's grave has been dug - his body buried. He will never ever wake up again to play another game with Light.

On the other hand you have Misa who has not only sacrificed what is like 75% of her life (not that I think that she actually wanted that long of a life) but also the one being since her parents died that loved her dearly. Rem is dead and she has been sacrificed by Misa for the love of a man that is incapable of loving her. She spends her time desperately trying to find traces of love in her life with Light but she can't find them no matter how hard she tries and self-delusion can only take her so far. As a solution she tries to seduce Light which - do I even have to explain how poorly that works? Plus Misa's misogyny internal or otherwise and her self-destructive tendency to recklessly destroy her platonic relationships with others makes it hard for me to imagine her having a deep relationship with anyone in her life. So once again in her life, Misa is alone and loveless which is probably something she considers to be a fate worse than death.

But will these two part way and try to find joy in their lives?

No. No they will not.

They will just keep lying to themselves and pretending that they are fine even when the bright pink dungeon of hopelessness that they call an apartment is on metaphorical fire.

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Soichiro Yagami

Randomly throughout the week I will remember that Soichiro Yagami died before Light was exposed as Kira and I am hit with an absurd amount of relief that this fictional character died before his equally fictional son was exposed as the mass murderer they were trying to catch.

Like I already find the second half of death note difficult to watch because L is dead, Light is acting like a widow searching for traces of her dead husband everywhere and Light and Misa's home life just looks so absolutely miserable that I feel sick just thinking about it.

I don't think I would be able to handle Soichiro's reaction to the confirmation that Light is Kira on top of all of this.

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at my father’s funeral. a light yagami poem.

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LawLight

This song reminds me soooooo much of LawLight. Like in an Au where L falls first and just his Kira kink showing through. Like he knows he should be focusing on solving the Kira case and he is, he has his suspect right in front of him, he's just collecting evidence. And to collect evidence he just has to seduce Light away from his 'girlfriend'. L just has to drive Light up the flipping wall.

Like don't worry Yagami-Kun my intentions towards your son are entirely pure and professional.

And Light would hate it and only hate it because L is annoying and no he doesn't enjoy it, he's not having the time of his life, you're crazy.

Light absolutely won't get petty, vicious revenge on L if L ever tries to stop and no he is not teasing L back and encouraging him to continue in his own utterly convoluted Light way that only L understands, you're an idiot if that's what you think.

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Does anyone else stop themselves from continuing to consume a piece of media, not because they dislike it or because they don't enjoy the series anymore but simply because they know that the next episodes or chapters are going to absolutely destroy them emotionally so much so that you won't be able to function?

Like I need to be productive. I have a life I need to live and responsibilities to fulfil right now and I can't go into a catatonic state without destroying everything I've been working towards for what is like three years of my life.

So instead I'm postponing continuing the series and instead plan on watching it afterwards when I'm free.

It kind of feels similar to noting down in my calendar when I'm allowed to have my next emotional spiral. However in doing so I have been spoiled so muchhhh.

(SPOLIERS FOR ALIEN STAGE BELOW)

I haven't watched whatever new alien stage content that's come out after Round 7 and I've already been spoiled about Huyna dying to save Luka and how Mizi isn't as sweet or naïve as we were led to believe and that she knew Till liked herrrrrr.

I purposefully avoided the Alien Stage fandom! I wasn't even reading Alien Stage fics on Ao3 because I knew that I would see spoilers about the series but I still got SPOILED

Now I'm sad.

I should have just shut down my internet and gone full hermit mode.

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Again, Ouroboros. Again, again, again—

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you can only regain your memories by touching/regaining ownership of the specific death note that you gave up, not any other ones (which is why misa doesn't get her memories back when rem reveals herself in the bathroom)

without ownership, touching the death note will still get you your memories back but only for the span of time you are in contact with it

you can only regain your memory up to 6 times per death note, after which the memories will not come back

CONCLUSION: If L had just bapped Light over the head with the Death Note in the helicopter six times,

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in the back of my father’s car. a light yagami poem

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How fucking annoying is it when you feel so restless with creative energy but you can’t decide what to do with it and when you finally try to create something it comes out shit so you just give up and sit there being all creatively annoyed and jittery.

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writing mood™️

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you guys are so fucking stupidddd omg "rapists and pedophiles should be chemically castrated, this is a good thing" quick tell me about historical precedents of this idea and who or what ideology they are connected to......... 🤔

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I adore all the AUs where Shen Yuan is a shixiong or about Binghe’s age but you know what the fandom is missing? Shidi Shen Yuan!

There are some stories where Shen Yuan is younger and Shen Jiu’s son, but I’m talking about a regular disciple Shen Yuan admitted to Qing Jing peak after Luo Binghe.

I just need tiny child Shen Yuan using the full force of his spite to feud with the strategist Peak Lord… only to actually win most of the time!

How could Shen Yuan possibly win against a paranoid sect strategist you might ask?

First, he could take full advantage of Shen Qingqiu’s complete disinterest in him, and his own disinterest in impressing Shen Qingqiu, to run rampant for quite a while before Shen Qingqiu catches on. He would seem to be just some stupid precocious child.

Second, I firmly believe Shen Yuan’s wifebeam, when directed at adults, could be an effective parentbeam. He could use all the little tidbits he has memorized about the other peak lords, the Qing Jing hall masters, the servants, and his fellow disciples, along with his genuine kindness and helpfulness (and a lack of Shen Qingqiu sabotage…at least to start with) to endear himself to a great many of them!

Third, he has the advantage of an adult’s brain in his child body, along with all sorts of knowledge nobody would reasonably suspect a child his age to have. Just because Shen Yuan has a giant blind spot regarding romantic intent and his importance to others, doesn’t mean he isn’t incredibly clever in many other ways, and fully capable of using the full force of that cleverness on Binghe’s behalf!

Fourth, Shen Qingqiu would have literally no clue what the kid was actually after. All that work just to make the life of Shen Qingqiu’s least favorite student a little bit better? Shen Qingqiu would never see it coming, and what is that if not the greatest weakness of all?

I just really want Shen Qingqiu, the man who starts feuds with children —including trying to murder one particular kid— to find out that his arch enemy is actually some other kid that he completely ignored. And the kid is winning via the secret tactics of “being nice” and “having no real ulterior motives (beyond the ‘being nice’ thing)”.

Also, Luo Binghe being protective of his little shidi who is somehow constantly getting himself in situations™. (It’s not Shen Yuan’s fault distraction is often his best ‘stop bullying Binghe’ technique).

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fake relationship but its a king and his concubine that was once an amazing soldier but he couldn’t go up the ranks for whatever reason so the king was like listen. hear me out. you can be my strategy dude. u just gotta be okay w walking around shirtless a lot. and soldier dude is like man that’s an UPSIDE and yknow they end up falling in love