dearscarlet-blog - Tumblr blog

[dearscarlet-blog]

I’m spending the whole weekend with my mom because I need to feel centered and come back to earth and her energy and love always makes me feel whole again.

[dearscarlet-blog]

Dear Scarlet, Our BFF Sabrie is in town and we had a slumber party with face masks, manicures, all our favorite snacks, and the pee wee movie. There was an entire summer when the three of us shared a bed. Her family took us in when we had nothing. There’s a bond here that will never ever leave. 

My bby girls

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ROUND 3 IS LIVE NOW

Launching tomorrow night!

www.babewear.bigcartel.com

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Dear Scarlet, At the end of your school play you took it upon yourself to ask your teacher if you could personally wish Bobby a happy birthday because it landed on the same day.

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You got jokes

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Dear Scarlet, Recently you’ve been really into roller derby after reading the graphic novel Roller Girl. We even took you to a bout two weeks ago. Stay tough, my girl.

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Scarlet Payne for @babe-wear MY HEART. 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕 When I asked why she was a babe she said, “because I’m super proud of my life.” 💞

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Vampire bat

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People have been saying “She’s almost as big as you are!” our entire life together. But it totally throws me off guard to see photos like this one where I’m faced with the fact that that’s becoming an actual reality. We’ve done a lot of growing together, this one and I. We don’t have the dynamic I always imagined I would possess as a mother. I’m not mother goose. I’m not soft spoken and calm. There’s also a sisterhood here. She’s witnessed me grow into myself, which means she’s been there for some very weak moments. I feel like I have to live up to this caricature of myself, and it’s a lot of pressure when people are constantly telling you what a good mom you are. It’s hard to not question yourself nonstop. I don’t think I’m a bad mom, and I don’t think I’m the mom that a lot of you think that I am. But I am her mom, and I do think I’m the mom she needs. One day in the not so distant future, she will be my size, my age. And I hope that she isn’t disappointed by me. She’s the only one I’m really out here trying to show up for. She’s the only voice in the room.

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8 years later

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Scar’s teacher just said this on fb and I lost it. 😭

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Bobby’s family party. Oreo Star Wars ice cream cake and presents. We’ve celebrated so many birthdays in this tiny crowded kitchen.

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when you have your stepdad wrapped so hard around your finger he holds your feet up for you so you can read comics at brunch

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You’re very into graphic novels and drawing little anime type animals right now. When did you grow up?

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Dear Scarlet, My strong beautiful girl. Our relationship has shifted and evolved in so many different ways over the years, especially over the last year as you’ve grown leaps and bounds mentally. I’m never going to stop living my life for you, whether it dictates my geographical location or not. You’ve saved me in so many different ways. Leading by example for your benefit has made me into a woman I never would have been without you. Maybe you say I made you, but you made me too. Thank you. I love you. Way way more than you know.

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Friendly reminder that once Scarlet asked me to break up with a dude because he pronounced "quinoa" the wrong way and she still brings it up monthly. EVEN THOUGH I DID BREAK UP WITH HIM AND IT WAS OVER 2 YEARS AGO. And when he was packing she screamed, "DON'T FORGET YOUR GUITARS!" from the next room.