diam-etrical

[diam-etrical]

Sorry this is not related to aruani or your fics. sorry.

I am not sure if you are a person I should go to, but I need to get this off my chest with someone. I started writing a fanfic in a ship that I love and pour my heart into. I started writing and then sometime after an author with the majority of the readers in the ship writes a story very similar to mine. There's not a lot of fics. So ours is the only two of the same concept. I was new to and I didn't start with an audience. It feels so defeating and frustrating that someone that already has an audience started a story similar to mine a few months after I started mine.

Yes I know I know. "write for yourself". But this has been upsetting me for months. ESPECIALLY when people rec their fic to me when they know I'm a writing my fic. Im sorry I went to you because I know youre not involved.

Don’t apologize. You struggled through long days and gave up sleep for it. You let parts of yourself bleed into the prose. You carved it out of your heart.

I'm not here to tell you to write for yourself. We don't. Not really. We write to understand ourselves first and foremost because what do we do after that? Hope that it will resonate with someone else.

Given it's a small fandom, you can't help but calibrate around similar ideas at similar points in time and wonder if it's anything to do with you personally. It's natural. But it's a common pitstop in every artist’s journey, if only to remind ourselves we're not as original as we would like to be, nor are we the first to combine such concepts.

The truth is anon, I've been struggling with this for a very long time.

I don't want to pretend like it's a problem I've overcome. It's a hill I've gone down on, only to realize there's more. You can't fully shake that feeling away because our craft is so close to our ego and our ego has a few things to say about its place in the world.

As an artist, the idea we're not saying anything original is mortifying. And of course, it can feel even more defeating when the same idea is amplified by someone else with better reception, like that kid who repeats your jokes louder in class. What could be worse?

But anon, I do know what's worse. When the resentment colors how I see the world. When it colors the way I interact with fellow fans who love the same ship I do with the same intensity.

Given it's a small fandom, I can't help but think how overjoyed the people might be to find two fics of the same concept. Can't help but think how wonderful it is that in spite of everything, you're STILL doing an act of creation that becomes even more important in the context of AI, something that is diluting what it means to create.

Original concepts aren't what draws people. Whether repeated, similar, or derivative, it's your voice, your interests, and your ability to draw meaning from your own experiences as well put it on paper that makes your work all the more important.

So, no, anon, don't write for yourself. Write for the future version of yourself that will be grateful you still kept writing in spite of it all.

[diam-etrical]

Finished it! yes connie is the shield

[diam-etrical]

just watched the thunderbolts*

[diam-etrical]

Warrior

[diam-etrical]

two separate interests of mine consolidated today: it was when I watched The Last of Us part 2 and then listened to the AOT JR central audio drama, specifically the brief exchange between Levi and Annie.

I wonder if anybody would be interested in a story about reluctant ex-soldier Levi, who must journey beyond the walls protecting Annie Leonhart, a 13-year-old girl said to be the last Titan shifter.

[diam-etrical]

For AruAniWeek 2025, Day 3: Historical AU

I was listening to the The Great Gatsby musical so maybe that's why I ended up with this.

Based on this leyendecker piece (so not obsessed with this guy)

[diam-etrical]

master v machine

Relationship: Armin Arlert/Annie Leonhart Tags: lovers to enemies, alternate universe - historical, betrayal, sad ending Word count: 10.4K

-O-

Synopsis: When chess grandmaster Annie Leonhart agrees to an unconventional tournament, she’s faced with her greatest adversary yet: a supercomputer, built by a programmer with more moves up his sleeve than she will ever be prepared for.

-O-

Told in a series of games and conversations that take place the night before.

For AruAni Week 2025, Day 6 Prompts: Lovers to enemies, Betrayal, Crushed like a bug on the ground

read on aO3

[diam-etrical]

thought about hijacked!armin the other day

(the aruani hunger games au is still ongoing i promise)

[diam-etrical]

what are the busy ambassadors doing for valentines day?

[diam-etrical]

armin's thoughts on mr leonhart

[diam-etrical]

you may kiss the...groom?

[diam-etrical]

Hello, Jam!

I hope you're doing fine, and I just wanted to thank you for your wonderful works, both in writing and arts! I love your incredible style a lot, and I'm so glad to see your stunning creations again!

I wish you all the best <3

hi anna! it's been an overwhelming past six months and i feel so embarassed getting back to everyone who has left me messages and has not heard back in so long.

i'm getting to them one at a time. thank you for being patient with me, it's why i just can't leave up and leave, not when it's what allowed me to draw and write again after so years of being in a creative slump.

i'm sure you feel the same way about aruani too, anna! the way they somehow just bring out some of the most stunning artworks i've seen. thank you for being part of this fandom <3

[diam-etrical]

aruartdeco

[diam-etrical]

Hi Jam, you're like my Taylor Swift of Ao3, your writing is beautiful and so poetic!

I hope you're well and I hope life isn't stressing you out too much.

I have a quick question....

IS ARMIN GETTING HIJACKED IN AWINATIG???

I was reading your introduction the other day and when explaining AWINATIG you said you're writing it because you just wanna see hijacked Armin... So yeah, now I'm scared 😃

you're so sweet, beloved!

i know it's been months (i'm so so sorry) but people like you being so patient is what keeps me coming back here.

now, on to serious business, is Armin getting hijacked?

Well, it's no secret I've always wanted to expand on that famous table scene where he looks absolutely deranged. It has kept me up in late hours, even during work, thinking of all sorts of things he would say if he were to get hijacked. Armin's words can comfort people but they could also just as easily cut and flog when he's at his worst.

Imagining him saying horrendous things he would never say to Annie haunts me at night. Imagining him recovering like Peeta equally destroys me.

You're right to be scared. I am too.

[diam-etrical]

OMG hey!!!

I love your fanfics and your propaganda Everlark as Aruani, Annie and Armin as Katniss and Peeta is something powerful.

thanks for following me, I really admire your fanfics

oh man, when that propaganda started in april 2021 i never thought i'd see an AOT movie AND a Hunger Games prequel drop on the same month. These softboy x hardenedgirl pairings are so so close to my heart.

Thank you so so much for these kind words and thank you as well for following me!

[diam-etrical]

as much as i love eremika i can’t imagine them in a hunger games au, or at least as a main character! i hate to say it but eren has some gale tendencies, but they��re very different still, and mikasa i really only imagine her as a tribute that wins because they underestimate her.

armin is very peeta coded through and through and annie probably reminds me the most of katniss, they’re very everlark coded to me. (especially because annie would throw armin into the wall like katniss does lol)

[diam-etrical]

I was reading @diam-etrical's inspired by The Hunger Games AU (which by the way is amazing and you should go read it if you haven't already) and had some thoughts on Peeta and Armin as mirror characters, mostly in terms of what this comparison brings to Armin's characterization (since I obsess over aot at the moment), which I decided to share with y'all.

So Armin is and isn't Peeta Mellark. They're both highly intelligent, skilled orators and perceptive. They have the ability to read people and to sway them in their favor. Also, especially in comparison to their more self-centered love interests, they both have a strong sense of morality.

However Peeta's thesis in the beginning of THG (which follows him throughout the story and shapes his character arc) is the line "If I'm going to die, I want to still be me," which is fundamentally antithetical to Armin's maxim "someone who can't sacrifice anything, can't change anything" (in the context of Erwin losing his own humanity for the greater good). What's more, Peeta's story proves Armin's philosophy wrong. Peeta very clearly defines the outcome of the games by his commitment to his beliefs and principles, by preserving what makes him human and when that is lost (in mockingjay), we as readers but also katniss as a character in the story, mourn this side of him and understand it to be a loss too great.

The thing is though, Armin's story also kind of proves him wrong (to a degree). On one hand, Armin is incapable of letting go of Eren and the image of him he remembers from his childhood: the strong, brave Eren who fought for justice. Ultimately, this inability to accept that Eren has changed is what clouds his judgment concerning Eren's motivation until it's too late. On the other hand, Armin ends up disagreeing with Eren that the Rumbling was for the better (I'm disregarding the "thank you for becoming a mass murderer" line because I interpret it to be for Eren's benefit--meaning that Armin was trying to comfort his best friend at that point). His last actions in the story are about him being opposed to Eren who deemed  the outside world worthy of sacrificing for the greater good of the Paradisians. Therefore, even Armin himself by the conclusion of the story is not willing to sacrifice everything.

And yet, Armin is not entirely wrong. Armin makes great sacrifices to achieve peace and to do the right thing. He is willing to risk his life, his friend's lives, the chance to be with the woman he loves, Eren (both in the sense of Eren's life and in the sense of Armin's idea of Eren). Armin is even willing to besmirch his own reputation (in his eyes) by naming himself Eren's killer; it is a burden he's willing to bear for Mikasa, but also to pacify the Marleyans. These sacrifices are crucial in order to prevent perpetual conflict.

In the end, Armin's quote is more about compromising than about giving up your humanity and empathy.

So the main takeaway from paralleling these to characters, at least for me, is that there are things that are worth sacrificing (toxic beliefs, your personal comfort, an oppressive status quo) and things worth preserving (ideals, life, love). Violence may be necessary to enact change, but in order to maintain the positive impact you created, you need to be able to drop your weapons and find common ground.