fainthedcherry - Tumblr blog

[fainthedcherry]

HAPPY TURTLE TUESDAYYY TMNT FANDOMMM!!!! I have a treat for y'all artists who love to make TMNT OCs!!! If you love the 2012 era, you're gonna love this one too!!!

A FREE TO USE TMNT DARK HORIZONS FLASH GAME CHARACTER SELECT TEMPLATE, MADE FROM THE ACTUAL GAME SPRITES!!! (Scroll below for the Google Drive of the files, credits first to the artist though sorry! :D)

(ft also the fancy animation particles for when you get to this menu, for those who wanna add it too! (( the GIF is the raw version, without the effect settings/scripts added in Flash tho.)))

PLEASE KEEP IN MIND!! I DID NOT CREATE THESE ASSETS, NOR HAVE I DRAWN THEM

(I am an artist posting this, who has replicated the game's art as a fan, so I want to disclose clearly, that these are NOT MY WORKS HERE.)

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE give all the credit to the SENIOR ART DIRECTOR working on this Flash game, Damian Aliberti and his team of artists from Quadramma (I could not find sources online that confirm who are said artists unfortunately, so I can only credit the art-director for now)!!!

He even made a page about this project, for his portfolio! Check it out, it's AWESOME!! (CLICK MEE / TAP MEEE)

^I didn't know they planned to bring this to mobile, so you can predict that I'm happy, that this game is still seemingly loved by the Italian studio that made it seemingly. x) (I can only assume they're Italian, due to the file-names, don't quote me on this though, barely any info exists on this Flash game as you can predict LOL)

GOOD NOW THAT YOU HOPEFULLY READ WHO MADE THE PRETTY ART: CLICK ME OR TAP ME FOR THE GOOGLE DRIVEE (drive provides the GIF, a PSD, SAI2, PNG and MDP file!! [the joys of owning several art programs, making this much more accessible to people :v])

btw, also like..Maybe not use this for commercial/profit purposes though, that'd be profiting off resources you didn't make, and that are copyrighted. I don't think that's legal. :"v

NO CREDIT REQUIRED. COMPLETELY F2U. I did not after all make the assets, nor will claim so. :V as I mentioned, I extracted these from the actual game, which is why these are all so crisp and nice looking, instead of me using a snipping tool like 2 yrs ago for my fun challenge of recreating the game's artstyle LOL

I do NOT claim these assets or the art I've extracted as my own, this is all purely from the game, and very obviously, these are I guess, owned by Nickelodeon, so I ask you ofc do not...Do some legally questionable things w/ this stuff sdfklsd, pls behave fans, I'd rather not get reported for something I didn't do for providing this to the internet. xD

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Whilst credit would be nice, and linking back to this would be even nicer for other fans who might just like me,, wanna replicate this cool game's aesthetic sdfskldglk, it's optional, completely LOL. It did only take like 2 hrs to piece this stuff together, to look like a real screenshot thank god. xD

FEEL FREE TO SHOW ME IF YOU ALSO DRAW IN THE GAME'S STYLE OR WANNA BANTER ABOUT TMNT OCS OROROR YKNOW USED THE THING AND WANT ME TO SEE ITTTT I GLADLY STARE AT TMNT POSTS NO MATTER WHAT ERAAAAA~

I JUST WANT PEOPLE TO APPRECIATE THIS GAME'S ARTSTYLE NGL. THAT'S ALL I WANT. And if more ppl also would wanna draw in it it'd make me so happy. I am like...The most acoustic TMNT fan out there man, I have the weirdest wishes in mind xD

Hope anyone wants this orrr like needs it orr dreamt of doing this too orrrr just never thought about doing it, but now that a free template is out there, someone might also wanna do it!! I love whenever like- fandom templates and stuff is made. I plan to maybe make this a Toyhou.se code too, since I do have the raw files of the games and could try to see if I can replicate the animations and stuff and make it non-premium and premium!

(Maybe I should make fandom codes more often in general tho at the topic of that, did it before for Terraria and helped out w/ a Monster High code, to give it a mobile compatible version LMAO)

If anyone or me figures out the artists behind the sprites, I'd gladly show them too, bc GORGEOUS GAME MAN!!!! THEY DESERVE ANY PRAISE THEY GET FOR THE ART AND THE GAME ITSELF ANSAHSHAJS, here I go again I swear, I'm done yapping now. I should participate in internet olympics when it comes to writing essays in every post I ever made. xD

[fainthedcherry]

When I was a child in 2013, visiting Nickelodeon's site and finding a treasure-trove of Spongebob, Winx and TMNT flash games was like magic to me. BUT MAN. The TMNT flash games are one of the best ever to me I've played in my life. (on an aesthetic stand-point! Turtle Tactics and Dark Horizons are so awesome man, legendary flash games to me.)

Since I am utterly autistic about 4 green alien turtles and their rat dad...Here we are again. With me posting OC cringe 2016 me would've killed myself over :V (cry about it 11 yo/ me, afraid of cringe culture back then, it's DEAD NOW)

Gonna sneak-post my redo of that ancient drawing I did of Alex 2 years ago, for the base-post : D

2 years ago, I used flashpoint to replay it for the first time in years and I remember crying of glee LOL (I still play Dark Horizons and turtle tactis to this day btw). I played Dark Horizons and Turtle Tactics and also TMNT: Throw Back (NO I DID NOT NAME THIS LIKE A MEME THIS IS ITS NAME. I STILL BURST INTO LAUGHTER LIKE A CHILD OVER THE NAME AGING POORLY DUE TO INTERNET LINGO)

Those 2 flash games are just so...Technically advanced?? For its time?? LIKE A FULLY FLEDGED 3D FLASH GAME WITH UNITY ENGINE BASIS? DAMN. And then Dark Horizons? CHEF'S KISS I LOVE THAT GAME SO MUCH. AESTHETICALLY AND THE COMBAT FEELS RLLY NICE TO ME IMO, AND JUST...Everything about THAT flash game, god TIMELESS CLASSIC I COULD YAP ON FOR HOURS ABOUT THIS NO JOKE.

I am enthralled by the designs and art of Dark Horizons, it's why I made this drawing. The game just..Speaks to me on so many levels. IT'S JUST SO PLEASING TO SEE ALL THE ARTWORK I EXTRACTED. As far to my knowledge- it never got released, so I might make a post of just a few favourites I liked from the game. :D

I just wonder if I can post those in the first place, it's after all, not my artwork, from a flash game, and TMNT, so yeah, legal IP and stuff. I unfortunately don't know who the artist if of the flash games, but if I can find that out via googling or digging for credits in the game or the files, I'll see if I can credit them, so that posting will be fairly accredited!!

OH YEAH RIGHT ALSO QUICK BANTER ABT ART SORRY I AM VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT THOSE FLASH GAMES AS YOU CAN TELL,,,

I studied the in-game sprites for a good few hours back then, and did my best to replicate it to the best of my abilities!! I think Mushu maybe could've been done better looking back at it, but I think it was the best that I could do back then. :D Plus, I remember being really happy, excited and proud of this piece, as it reflected something, my childhood self always wanted: For Alex to like.."fake" being an official character LOL. I had sooo many dreams where Alex was hanging out with the turtles and Ninjago and throwing in Power Rangers for good measure, just...Everything I liked as a child, I somehow connected in my dreams via either "OH YEAH THE RAINBOW FAIRY!" or "OH YEAH SUDDENLY PORTAL AND MY MARY-SUES JUST BRAVE IT WHILST THE OFFICIAL CHARACTERS DRAMATICALLY TELL THEM NOT TO GO"

^I had vivid and....Creative dreams as a child to say the least, sometimes even Darth Vader and Eggman appeared as the bad guys, despite TMNT and Power Rangers and Ninjago w/ the snakes and lord Garmadon or however you spell him (I never checked + I'm German so ofc his name might be different in english)- I- do I have to go on about the dreams I FULLY remember I had, as a 6-9 yo/, until I told myself at 10 how embarassing my dreams are and stopped doing so? I DIGRESS. I..Need to be more professional in these, instead of such pure fandom trash oml, I feel bad for whoever actually has to read through my blatant autistic interests as a child and thinking "wtf is he on about" dfgklfdg

ANYWAY NEKST POST IS THE BASE. I SWEAR. SORRY I LOVE RAMBLING

[fainthedcherry]

This one is just me at my sister's 😭

Bothering the beast

[fainthedcherry]

SOOO I went "SCREW IT POSTING THIS DOODLE BC I FELT LIKE IT"... AFTER LIKE...YEARS OF NOT DOING A SPONTANEOUS DOODLE UPLOAD WOW,,

Alex + Mushu (OCs) ft. the 4 official 2012 torts!!!

I've been in turtle-fever as you can tell,,, I finished this last week actually!!! I was doodling Marco and Niraj this week instead. BUT ALAS...HAVE A POST!!! HOLY CRAP GUYS I'M NOT DEAD AND I'M POSTING FREQUENTLY THIS MONTH!! AND ACTUALLY EXPRESSING MY INTEREST IN FANDOMS FOR ONCE AGAIN!! I might post something TMNT related Tuesday again!! ;D

No srsly why tf is it so hard for me to draw official characters instead of only drawing OCs, it's a curse for me sefklsdlkg

JUST AN IDEA I HAD TO DRAW THIS...NOTHING REALLY SUPER COMPLEX CAME TO MIND. Instead, I accidentally made the doodle w/ Raph 3-VP perspective, had to fix a bunch of lines, gave up on others. THIS WAS DRAWN WO/ A RULER AND YOU CAN TELL. SO DON'T MIND CRAPPY PERSPECTIVE INCONSISTENCY. I swear I can actually draw perspectives like a professional, I just choose to spend as little time as possible on paper. I hate drawing traditionally on paper, but I still force myself to stay in-practice, bc I get more organic ideas through that way. References are more of a digital-art thing for me...AAaaa dsrgrgkloj

I'm REALLY proud of Mikey here!!! My fav boi looks rlly good here,,, 😭

This is only like the 3rd time I've ever drawn these boys in my life!! I think this is a not bad start toward my cringe-embracing era. xD

Hope you don't mind me adding tags of the boys!! I just,,, am so happy I'll be able to!!!!!!!!!! JUST. JUST FINALLY I'VE DRAWN THEM IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY I FINALLY DARED TAKE THE STEP

Also adding TMNT OC tags,, hope you don't mind, I'm not trying to shill I swear, I just really like tagging my art honestly. 😭

[fainthedcherry]

I...May or may not have been binging TMNT whilst working on projects. And uh. I got too many caps to count out of this

And...I may or may not have cut out Mikey in 5 mins to put him in any meme I want. (Done in PS and sized up x2 on the right, removed the blurryness via "sharp edges" filter, sorry I'm not a native English speaker, but that's approx what it was from German LOL)

In other words..No credit needed, this is from an official 2012 TMNT EP (S2, EP where Slash debuts don't know it's english name AUGH) ENJOY!!! GO HAM!!! FEEL FREE TO SHARE ME YOUR MEMES IF YOU DO MAKE ONE!!!

(I just hope somebody else laughed their arses off when they saw it as a modern watcher, bc I sure did LMAO)

Oh yeah, if you do see this as a TMNT fan, I'm primarily an artist and draw TMNT to the side, w/ my OC. Nothing more. BUT. I might start drawing proper fanart in the future :)

[fainthedcherry]

Just a tiny post as a thank you lately, to the people who've been seeing my posts! I am seriously surprised, that so many people have liked my drawings :D

I know it doesn't look the best, as ofc, I took 20 mins, so I can get back to working on my OTAs and comms and stuff dfgkjdfkglö, but I still felt like, I should acknowledge the kindness I've been getting from you all!!

I appreciate every single interaction I get. To me, it's such a huge step, to have been noticed by some new users outside my circles. A massive thank you, to anyone who checks me out. And not to forget, thank you so much for sticking around, to those, who've known me prior to joining Tumblr! You're the best, for believing in me, to a point you'd even follow me on other platforms. <3

Your interactions let me know, that my posts ARE actually wanted on this site, and that I can continue to build up my portfolio here instead, somewhere, where I'm comfortable now. :D

With that, I continue working on my owed art though!!! My unfinished pieces can't wait forever, plus ofc, it can also be posted, the sooner I finish haha. I hope to post monthly hopefully, like I used to on my DA!!! x)

Again, I need to think about, whether I start posting character concepts and rambling about their stories and connections and whatnot...Hopefully I'll make up my mind about that. xD

SPEAKING OF!!! Since managing multiple accs on Tumblr seems MUCH easier, I plan to possibly revive, what was supposed to be my photography acc on DA (until not long after AI art was announced and I gave it up just because of THAT). I take quite a few pics to this day, of animals and flowers I see! I had such cute and good pics lately, I honestly had an itch to post those on my art acc here, but then I had this better idea, of making 2 seperate blogs for it. xD

[fainthedcherry]

7.3.24 there was a deadline for a DTIYS my IRL friend, kobra_the_artist , hosted back around February!! I had like...3 days to finish the sketch I started back in February. It's...A pain being late to EVERYTHING with a deadline, but at least deadlines help me push finish a drawing, I otherwise would let rot in my WIP folder for almost a year (hell, some sketches are like 3 years old that are rotting in there now, that I'm self-aware about, yet still keep forgetting. ._." )

I don'ttt have too much to say on this one? Since it was a DTIYS, I recommend checking out the insta post simply, I'm not about to take my friend's artwork and cross-post it to somewhere else, I feel, that'd be scummy to do. :T SO LINK TO THE OG CONTEST POST! HUZZAH! plusssss, I think I yapped enough on my own insta post. :v

I just rlly wanted to draw Kobra, as I love her sona's design. I adore demon-anything, can u blame me LMAO. I need excuses to draw ppl's OCs willingly and gladly more. It's so hard to motivate myself to draw something at all for people anymore AUUUUGH

Somehow I won 1st place??? Don't ask em HOW, as I found other people's entries much better than mine ngl, butttt I'll never understand, that my art is actually enjoyed by some people anyway, ngl. Even years later, I still sometimes feel, like I don't deserve to call myself an artist LMFAO

I also added a little funne below, we both wanted to draw for fun, once we were in a call just rambling and stuff. On the right, has been drawn by Kobra!! (You can open the green, first link above, to her insta itself! She doesn't have Tumblr. No one in my friend group does, but I love Tumblr tbh. :"))

You should try ceramic pans. They are the best flavour. /lh

ANOTHER POST THERE IS! WHERE ART IS! I might post character concept-refs next. I'm running out of "good-looking things" to post, that won't make me look like a total amateur from the 2010s DA era. I've only uploaded these in my scraps on DA back then, so maybe you'll get weekly posts, as I draw concept refs basically weekly, to keep my chara-base up to date for comms and art exchange!

I wanna do a DTIYS myself some day!! But maybe in 4 years, where I dream of having paid off all my art-debt finally I've been working so hard to pay off on lately...

[fainthedcherry]

ALSO; Here's ANOTHER piece I forgot to post, but was really excited to post. Yeeeah it doesn't get better with my inconsistency and forgetfulness, I know, it's only getting worse haha.

THIS IS A COMMISSION THIS TIME, for my friend Hollowed-Hartlocke on DA and TH!!

Owloette and this outdated, redesigned version of Hoodude belongs to Hollowed-Hartlocke design wise,

Chiri belongs to me (she's in the BG by request of Hart)

Vanilly Hoodude Voodoo belongs to Mattel, and so does Heath Burns (to the right of the drawing.) ((The outfit is not official, I made a random outfit design to fit thematically))

Thank you SO SO much for believing in me, being so patient for me for so many years now!! I am so happy, that you were the first person, to actually pay me in IRL money, what an honour, that my friend is so nice to me man. 🥺💖

Yes, a commission! In this modern day, can you believe it? I've yet to finish 2 more comms, I hope to finish them this year, honest to god. It's so hard to get a grip on some responsibilities, as I gotta figure stuff out appointment-wise with my driver's exams, psychologist-stuff abt my diagnosis still, and ofc, deal with the fact, that I gotta babysit my coworkers (not exaggerating, I keep being bugged on my weekends about my coworkers over some random annoying stuff they didn't wanna do under the normal work-week), and continue to study for tests and finish a presentation until next week.

^As you can tell, it's a bit stressful lately, which is why I had difficulty drawing at home, getting out of bed, to add with cramps post-work, hip- and knee pain in my bones, migraines. it all stacks up, and it doesn't help, that I lately had a spike in my ADHD seemingly acting up again. Been unable to concentrate, been getting overwhelmed, been having some EXTREME time-blindness. It's a bit hard with life lately. :")

It probably makes sense, why I was absent for a good bit. I ache a lot physically, and mentally lately and just. A. LIFE. I DO NOT LIKE IT. BUT MUST SURVIVE IT.

I again, tried something different with the lighting here, being a more direct-light source! I tried to make the lights look harsher, and I think this isn't too bad! Again, in hindsight of 2024, months later, shoulda proooobs made the shading sharper in appearance, still looks too soft, for direct-light hitting this floppy fellow. And also, added a drop-shadow for Heath near the lighting. Dear god, I wish I wouldn't make so many mistakes aaaa.

But oh well, that's what passage of time is, growing up, sucking up mistakes, trying to rid of your perfectionism.

[fainthedcherry]

YET ANOTHER OTA for my friend Hollowed-Hartlocke, I planned to post OH SO GOD DAMN LONG AGO MAN. This OTA was finished in December 2023!!

Kieran belongs to my bestie Hollowed-Hartlocke on DA and TH !!!

This drawing is still also in my old style!! If only I wasn't reworking it so much, I'd probably be drawing anything but sketches lately. It takes time after all, to sit down and start my projects properly again, in a new style. It isn't exactly new-new..But I changed a lot about the way I approach finishing a piece, is the thing. It takes more layers and more different brushes now, and once I get comfortable with my new schedule, it should work MUCH faster, faster than ever!!!

I experimented with low-lighting here, or rather- well, harsher-lighting, to be specific. I know, I tend to make my light sources very natural and mostly from the side, so I always try to shake it up and try something new. Oh yeah, also I was tasked to create a room for him, so I did!! Very modern, luxurious and blue-themed, were the keywords for me. (The overlays make the room look much more blue tho)

As a fun fact to this piece, I created a 2ND BACKGROUND FOR THE BACKGROUND!! That was also something fun to do! But I did ofc, add rain bc I wanted this piece to be moody and just. Chill. : ]

To me, summer nights, with that wet rain-smell and having the perfect drink beside you, whilst you just...Stare off and watch nature do its thing is just. So mesmerizing to me, so I did want to capture it in this piece. I think that's all I can say to this, beside, that I LOVE Kieran's design. I asked, if I could draw em to Hart LMAO

Tho in 2024 hindsight, I SHOULDA added a bit more harsher shadow on the blanket, it lacks some dimension, I admit LOL. But 'tis the way of improving, months later.

[fainthedcherry]

OTA's I finished, back in September AND November 2023!!

BOTH ARE FOR MY BSF HOLLOWED-HARTLOCKE !!!

Lalune (non-chib piece), Lockelyn (timeskipped) belong to Hollowed-Hartlocke (on DA and TH)!!!

Rien and the extinct owl familiar belongs to Fritz012400 (inactive, BUT has a DA) !!!

Did the chib OTA to pay off a TH signup code forrr someone? I forgor who sdflkjsdg (I have Toyhou.se premium now so I thank god don't need to mooch anymore from my friend /lh)

ANYWAY the like- technical stuff I always want to mention aside, DRAWINGS. DRAWINGS I SPENT A BUNCHA TIME ON B4 WORKPLACE REAPED MY FREE TIME ENTIRELY FOR A GOOD WHILE. Ever since like..February? Or March I think? I've started developing a rhythm and a schedule, knowing how much I can draw, what projects I can afford to start to try to finish around the weekend, so yeahhh, slowly getting a grip on my now perma-busy life, instead of temp-busy!!

I unfortunately started having so little time to spare, that without appointing to talk to me, I had to drop talking to A LOT of people, who simply never message me, but I HAVE TO. Some day, I'll have to purge my discord friend list again. I already did twice, but I still have so many people I never talk to, nor talk to me. Like..I need to clean up my act, and finally make sure, I only keep people around, who actually matter to me or want to spend time with me.

For the Rien/Locky piece, I wanted to reference that painting of Aphrodite, it's just...Such a lovely painting. I love Michelangelo anything, or hell, anything greek-mythos too (which is probably why I got back into reading Percy Jackson lately YIPPEEE, live, laugh, love Grover /lh)! Hope you at least enjoy the silly ref. : >

I tried a diff FOV in the drawing, along with a lower perspective on the Lalune piece. I LOVE clown-ANYTHING. The moment I learned about TADC it motivated me to finish this, I think. I've seen the trailer somewhere back in 2023, which motivated me to finish this again! I did my best, to create a porcelain texture on her qt lil face!!!

*the Lalune piece is still done in my old artstyle. I haven't made fullbody piece with my new artstyle YET. Keyword is yet. I've progressed to halfbodies so far.

[fainthedcherry]

Haven't posted these 2 lil bbys anywhere yet, I think!! Soo let me post something, to try to get back into the habit. I don't think it's a secret, that I hate social media and mostlyyyy do not like posting on it, plus it's hard for me to keep up with algorithms. I wanna be my own artist, without algos, to determine, whether people see my stuff or not. I guess it's an advantage, starting so small again. On some days, I was embarrassed to post stuff, on others I wanted to be seen by everyone under the sun. So let me just...Post something for the sake of myself.

(This drawing is almost a year old again, fresh posts will be rare from someone like me with low energy btw, to new people visiting my page by some sheer stroke of luck)

I made this back when like...I freshly changed my chibi style again, to something I'm more happy with.

I love drawing Chloe and Leo together but....I still yearn the day, where Finn and Marco overtake via "most images" category on TH. I just can't stand to see Chloe is my most-drawn character. I do NOT want to accept that fact. I want C.I.Ta or my boys to stay on top. I don't even LIKE Chloe that much, which I think, bothers me to the core, that she has so many drawings to begin with. My fault ofc, that she's so easy to draw as well. But that begs the question, why I keep putting my more detailed charas along with someone like her together sdfgkjsdg.

One thing I might need to get rid of btw, is my bad tendencies to CONSTANTLY write long descs. Like idk. Does anyone read these? Should I just..Stop adding these? Even though I love rambling? Does it stop people from looking at my art? You can let me know, if you want. I spend 1-2 hrs just...Putting down my process and my thoughts about a drawing down here. But I'm not sure, if people want that. Yes, it's my blog and all, but I try to keep it more professional and high-key here, unlike my Insta, which is just...My garbage dump basically, 0 fricks given.

Anyway, I'll see if I can schedule a posts for a bit, so that I don't just drop off the face-of-the-earth again. Between all the death that surrounded me and just overall, the many migraines I had last week, I am ever so mildly concerned, about my own wellbeing not getting any better, yknow? Also btw, I am a bit rusty with tagging things, so expect me to possibly get tags wrong again, but as mentioned in a previous post, how tf do you tag something properly anyway. There's no rules to tags, just basic human decency, to add the right ones and not be a scumbag bot-advertiser LMAO

[fainthedcherry]

Sigh. just like last year, it's another year full of death and tragedy. Rest in peace, to my maternal grandmother now. Mom is gone for now, and I worry. I hope she'll do well in Kazakhstan, with her family. I feel utterly broken down. I feel like I'm mentally on my last legs again. I think it'll take even longer to get back into spirits, of really posting anything at all. Social media is so hard to handle, for someone like me, who barely has any energy to be social.

I hope for this constant tragedy to end. I'd like to feel OK again lately. Sorry for the accidental venty-sounding post, I feel, I should just update you all on why I haven't posted much. I'm stuck in a massive mental rut.

[fainthedcherry]

Truer words have never been spoken by the fish. You must hear these relatable, profound news RIGHT THIS INSTANT

my neck hurts AND I'm gay

[fainthedcherry]

Happy Valentine's Day. I planned this animation for the 14th. So here it is. I'll probs spend a week or 2 off social medias now again, when it's personal reasons like talking to people or commenting on art again. I just. Don't feel feel well and ready, to talk to people yet.

Sorry that this is so bad, I just had to join a trend for once. It was too funny, not to, at the time when I started working on this. Unfortunate timing, of real life events, is what made me stop working on this. So sorry that this looks like such a mess, haha. I work a lot in colours, when animating + I'm new to using Opentoonz. I only took a 1hr detour, to learn how keying works. I can do it now, but...It's still wonky, as you can tell in the vid.

I got nothing else to say, I just..Hope you find this OK enough, to consider this a post, worthy briefly disappearing for. I never usually post my animations in this...State of disarray, I guess. Typically they're fully shaded, linearted, you name it. So..This is kind of. Giving me anxiety to post. I never posted something so...Unfinished-looking before, in regards to animation.

[fainthedcherry]

I am so crushed right now. I got the news, that my childhood best friend has been found dead. I may've not seen her for years now, due to her moving, but mom said she saw her alive just last month. I don't know, whether what used to be my neighbour lied to my mom and my sister, but I hope this isn't some sick prank.

I don't know how to feel right now, but I feel incrediby unwell and shocked already. I definitely am not taking these news well. I don't know, whether it'll affect my capabilities to post. I planned to post something for valentine's, but I don't know if I can anymore. Forgive me, for having so much get inbetween my workload.

But I'm going through a lot since 2023, emotionally. I'll try to be tough for myself, but I doubt I'll hold through. I don't know, if I can genuinely get back into the mindset of working from this. I feel. So awful. It feels like a dark pit is sucking my entire energy out of me. I never expected to break into tears over such news.

Ruhe in Frieden, Emmy. Wir sind seitdem wir umgezogen sind wie unbekannte geworden, aber ich habe immer über dich nachgedacht nach meinem eigenen Umzug. Ich weiß, dass es sich wohl nicht lohnt sein Herz auszugießen über so etwas..Aber ich glaube ich sollte dennoch meine Erinnerungen an dich ehren. Wir haben uns nicht immer gut verstanden früher, aber die Erinnerungen und Fotos die wir gemacht haben, werden ewig bleiben. Ich hoffe Leute aus deinem Umkreis und deiner Familie geht es gut. Ich hätte niemals gedacht, dass dein Leben so früh schon genommen wurde von diesen Giften, die uns alle verführen zum ungutem. Ich hoffe dir wird es gut gehen, wo auch immer du jetzt sein magst.

[fainthedcherry]

PARAMORE RELEASED THEIR A24 TRIBUTE COVER TODAY. AND I GOT INSPIRED BY THE LYRICS AND THE VISUALIZER.

IMAGE CREDITS BC VERY OBVIOUSLY THIS IS AN EXPERIMENTAL PIC COLLAGE PIECE PRIMARILY BELOW DESC (I DID NOT TAKE THE COOL PICS OBV.)

OK GIANT CREDIT BLOCK GO (Freepik and pexels my beloved saved my entire college year lmao):

1 OCEAN WAVES

2 OCEAN WAVES AGAIN

3 YES A THIRD OCEAN WAVE

4 VERY COOL DROPLETS

5 FLAME. OO FIRE PRETTYYY /POS

6 BG I CHEATED YOU INTO BELIEVING IS RAIN

The drawing though is made by my acoustic arse /lh

THE LYRICS ARE TAKEN FROM THE VID I LINKED. HAYLEY'S VOICE MY BELOVED AND FOREVER DEAREST ENTIRE BAND /POSPOSPOS. I wanna sing like Hayley so badly, she is such an idol to me, when it comes to vocals and I wish to sing as expressive as her some day 🤧✨💖

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WHAT MORE CAN I SAY, OTHER THAN I'VE BEEN EXPERIMENTING WITH SHORT DRAWINGS, THAT TAKE UNDER A DAY TO COMPLETE TO FIGURE OUT SOME THINGS I WANNA DO AS AN ARTIST AND POSSIBLY COMMISSIONS. + These drawings genuinely kinda de-stress so it's been free therapy too, oops. I wanna do more of these vector-style drawings, that are just me taking lyrics and creating these fun collages, of things that inspire me or I like. It's a chill practice and lets my creativity actually do the work for once, instead of my usual need to outdo myself in every drawing and improve lmao. Improvement is cool and all, but dear god did I not realise how hard my need for perfection last year stress and strangle me tf out. I seriously need to re-evaluate the way I approach art as this massive, intimidating medium, when most artists literally draw for fun, and for me it's been like...A Sisyphean task.

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If you enjoyed seeing this, I might make a sequel with C'est Comme Ca and w/ Marco in it instead and a red BG,, if I want to, I might turn these into a series, just like those aesthetic icon drawings I made of my 2 boys, started Lotta, and IMMEDIATELY lost that sketch due to my USB's death back in 2022 and lost all motivation for art due to that massive loss /neg

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Not sure what else to add here other than my thoughts that I already did!! Other than ofc, the usual, MASSIVE thank you to my friend Hollowed-Hartlocke for introducing me to Paramore back in 2019 <3

Think I'm done rambling now tho!! OH WAIT. I can add, that I had to actually pull out Adobe Illustrator just to add stretched text for aesthetic purposes. Then I got so impatient with the effects panel not showing me the usual layer-effects and me being too lazy to look up, whether InDesign was the one, that had the usual layer effects I use in an Adobe program or not. Btw still mooching off my college acc that shoulda been dead long ago but just isn't??? LMAO I'M STILL GONNA USE IT IF I CAN ALRIGHT.

OH YEAH BTW. This drawing took 3 hours. NO I'M NOT KIDDING. PEOPLE WOULD PROBABLY BE SHOCKED THAT SUCH A LAZY LOOKING PIECE TOOK SO LONG. BUT I GENUINELY AM RATHER SHOOK THAT I TOOK SUCH LITTLE TIME TO CREATE THIS. TBF I threw MOST proportion checks and canvas flips I do out the window, so there's a BIG chance I will hate this, if I flip the canvas xD ANYWAY I RAMBLED LONG ENOUGH I THINK NOW. JUST ENJOY EXPERIMENTAL ART

^Before-bed edit; Yeah his torso's a TAD too much leaning to the left, it's off-center to the rotation of his pelvis to be in fact, but maybe? I'll roll with this mistake. It kinda gives the piece its abstract nature..I kinda like the mistake?? This is the first time in my life I ever tolerated a mistake I did and now declare it on purpose and will probably build one into the next piece as well. Hell, maybe it'll yield an interesting result. Anyway, it's 12PM as I write this, and I have to get up at 4AM for my train soOooo, yeah, gotta sleep ASAP for school.

I have NO clue again what to 100% accurately tag this, so forgive me if the tags are wrong LMAO, I just will believe what I believe it has overlaps w/ within art-genre.

This piece kiiinda gives pop art??? So I'm gonna tag it as such as well, but but might be incorrect. If a pop-art enjoyer wants to correct me, PLEASE DO. I'm going off the definitions of pop-art I learned in high-school. So I could most def be wrong about me adding this tag in particular. How tf do people confidently tag their posts when I doubt almost every tag I add man. Tagging is the worst part of uploading art to me due to how hard it is to label art really, not meant to be in a genre. xD

Def adding Paramore tags tho bc I NEED to know more Paramore fans out there bc we feel like such a tiny community, when they're literally one of the most influential rock bands of the 2000s and 2010s imho AUGH

[fainthedcherry]

I'M SO EXCITED TO POST THISSSS ♥ I FINALLY FINISHED DABBLING W/ MY STYLE AROUND AGAIN!!!

And this time I'm CROSS-POSTING!! WAOW!!! Lemme copy paste the desc tho bc I wanna go eat bread bc ofc the German craves near-midnight bread slices sdflksdklg

I hate drawing lineart. SO I'M GETTING RID OF IT. Especially ever since AI art is a thing, have I really started valuing all the imperfections my art got. Because I know, that I put time and my soul into a piece. I guess AI is the reason, I probably even finally braved myself to just. Let loose, let the perfectionism go and try to just. Have fun.

AND OMG DID I INDEED HAVE FUN. This is the most fun drawing I've worked on thus far 😭😭😭

Usually, my perfectionism makes me frustrated and upsets me deeply, makes me drop drawings and projects, make me just..Hate my art.

I don't think my art is supposed to be clean. I think the messiness...Represents not only me, but my tastes, experiences as a person and the simple freedom I enjoy, of being a hobbyist artist. I'm kind of glad, I chose a job, where I don't actually draw. I think it was the right decisions for me.

This drawing was drawn in 4 hrs!! THAT IS SO FAST FOR SOMEONE LIKE ME /POS

Good changes are coming this year AAAAA,,,,,