frametoday

[frametoday]

The Art of Helping People

Rule number one is never expecting them to reciprocate your help. Don't expect something in return. You help because you want to help, not to do transactions and you know that the people that you want to help want help from you. Be real, wise and authentic.

Rule number two never regrets that you helped someone. It's something that you can't control and always believe that you were helping them because you want to help. If you don't want to help them, then just say no.

Rule number three is to believe that YOLO (You Only Live Once) to help someone dearly for someone. The impact, you can have it later. Not instantly but you can have it in the afterlife. like, Pay It Forward movie, kind of.

Rule number four is, it's okay to ask for help. The first regret and the biggest wastes of time when we get older are not asking for help, alongside worrying too much about other people.

Rule number five, your time/money/things will not get wasted just for doing a favor or help someone. Sharing things with someone that we care or need for help does not make you poor in life, but instead, it creates something that bonds and you can cherish meaningful things in life, especially yours.

Before all those, sometimes people will do bad at you, so get your boundaries straight before everything else.

[frametoday]

A September Note

Usually I wrote down my thoughts on my birthday but this year I am writing this kinda bit late. Still okay. 

So, another year has passed while being a 30-ish probably is still the most captivating thing. Forever grateful that this year all my beloved one are healthy on this pandemic time however i worry much, but it doesn’t help me through my days. All I can do is doing a mindfulness stuff everyday. Trying to!

Enough pep talks, HOW ARE YOU RIFIE? WHAT CHANGED? 

Well, short version is I am in a good mood and stupendous. Lot of things happened in past year and I am trying to understand what it taught me. No, seriously. I’ve been in really joyful moment and in a really dark, dark version of myself. Great isn’t? It’s like a dark Bulbasour (Bulbasour is a Pokemon).

Long version? I have 3 major stories that changed my way of thinking. 

1. Keep your goals In front of you and feel the outcome.

Funny that you read this from the most procrastinator person. Hence I am sharing this with you. 

I get distracted much, I have dozens of projects that’s being abandoned and the worse part is I am easily bored. On this pandemic time, this things has to stop. I get it, my time is limited.

So I took a step back, thinking and writing down on what I want to achieve and cut it into smaller tasks. I set a goals that doesn’t make me stop and I read that everyday as a reminder, because no one will do it for you. I also deleted lots of projects and stick into just enough that I can handle. New shiny things makes me forget things that I need to accomplished. I feel really bad. 

So I set my outcomes. I begin with the end in mind. I imagine how my great feeling after I completed a tasks or projects. The awesomeness and that good mood. A feeling that you need to feel. Just projected that every morning and you feel you can conquer everything that day~! Distraction is a dust!

2. Re-learn and find a good habit.

I learned this the hard way, I’ve been into the sense of I want to do anything that long so I learned stuff that what I only want to know but forget how to do a proper way to learn. This is essential. Start from fundamental first and go further. A good habit to start new thing!

3. The way you communicate to people about what you want to happen, it matter.

It’s not a problem about how the person will reacted, it’s about human relationship.

Be ready to communicate kindly about what you want, more of that you involve someone to be on your plan, you are talking to a human that has feeling and emotion that we really don’t know how deep it is. I know sometimes you need to say it in a direct way cause that’s is the correct way to say it, probably you need to have add one more parameter. Probably more. 

So please, bear in mind for talking more decent way. I am so tired listening other’s people being hurt, feeling deeply wounded just because someone talk in a very hurtful way. It also hurt me as a friend that listening to the story! 

Life is short, what a shocker. Be kind because our strong words can be on their deep, deep heart. Just don’t break it like you don’t want them to break yours.

Alright. One more thing... Stick to your core values because if you get lost and let go something, you can get back to that. A win-win. Life is too short to feel like crap!

Have a great day~ September is always a good month to do a step back.

[frametoday]

At Home day 80.

Day 80. Lots of habits have changed. I found the changes are for the better. I believe so. I still believe so. My daily commute time is gone now. I trade that with working on my 'indie maker’ skills. Still struggling on work on details but I will get there. It’s just a matter of hours of experience. I also do lots of chores, So how I split the time between work and managing distraction at home?

Start early is the key. 

If I am late to start on my daily routines, then I will be late on working my business as usual or ad-hoc things. I will be working on the bed for half-day or even doing calls there, which is really makes me tired, feeling really glued into my laptop. You’re gonna have a bad time I tell ya~! 

I am really enjoying my lunchtime, together with my daughter. Might this is the time that she will remember for a long time since I never eat at home.

At night, I still need to feel really good, because it’s ‘me’ time. I mean, really only my time. I want my own time at home for doing things that I loved!! And I stop doing things at 11pm and straight go to bed. Except for the weekend.

Just take your time. I am still on 'working at the office' mindset that needs to work 9 to 5 while on remote work, that's not how it works.

Rifie, what about your social life? 

My social life is still normal. Even though mostly the conversation based on text, I am still okay. What I am not okay is I miss the atmosphere while you’re talking with friends, either at the office, park, the outside, coffee shop, or while we’re having lunch or dinner. I am still 58% extrovert, don't worry. I did a podcast with friends, talking nonsense on my Instagram Stories or just text my friends and if they're replying back, it's a bonus lol.

Rifie, what about the overthinking?

Cmon, it’s day 80. I stop overthink since day 79. Nah! I am a very flexible person. If I overthinking something that means that I am sensing something that will have a chance it will be 100% real! 

Yeah, I am welcoming my new norm. The Abnorm.

[frametoday]

Adding my first podcast. Still stiff and nervous even though I am talking with friend @roysimangunsong 😄, Well it will get better! I am welcoming any feedbacks!

[frametoday]

Look Back, Don’t Stare.

Write more, you said. So much medium nowadays to put our thoughts. I haven’t shared many things with everyone and keep it everything for myself on my computer or my phone. Sometimes I got bored or I was thinking it wasn’t worth writing. Let it go, I said. 

2019 will end soon and we are gonna start a new year, 2020. For some reason, I keep thinking about what will I do in the next ten years. SRSLY RIFIE!? THIS IS SO NOT ME. I started to have a plan and writing down things that came across. I never think about my own time. Lesson learned time is the most valuable thing that I have now. 

If I can put on my own compilation album in a decade (2009-2019), I will call my album “Greatest Hits,, Those Were Fine Days” in my own words. Here’s my own song title list:

Mother and Wife

Photographs

A Strong Leap

You Are Always Loved

Home

Eight Letters, Three Words, One Meaning

Almost Dying Changes Nothing

Transactional

Edinburgh

Lil Lady

Faraway and Helpful

'After All That We've Been Through?'

1920 hours

S.F (Setbacks and Fears)

Unconditional

Dear Altruists...

Failure To Communicate

In The Zone

Flying To The Moon

A MARVelOus one.

All based on what I’ve been experienced in the last 10 years. Happy, sad, thoughtful, superficial, broken-hearted, greatest day, you name it. I wrote all the details on each title in my journal. 

Why I did that? 

I do believe that before you want to make a jump, a strong one, you need to step back, set your mark and getting ready and then JUMP successfully! and of course, KEEP GROWING and NEVER GOING BACK into whatever things that made you miserable!

As my case here, I need to look back on what I’ve been through before starting to create my rough plan. Kinda bit bullshit but I think this is important hahaha. 

Well, If you’re reading this and you know me... Here’s to the next ten years 🥂! 

Best,

Rifie~

Photo by Joshua Earle on Unsplash

[frametoday]

Free Writing #4 - On being Spontaneous

I get the point that human is a spontaneous creature. When they being thoughtful or just being you know, spontaneous. Can you spot the difference?

With time in your side, probably doing spontaneous thing it's not hard to do. Like myself.

Sometimes, people don't understand, giving time for someone rather than for them self. Occasionally. 

Like i told you, I have inner spontaneous.

[frametoday]

Talk with people log #2

As you remembered, I wrote on my previous post that I want to meet people and gain new perspective. I did that! Well, sort of.

Two days ago I met with my friend, which a doctor, surgeon and internist. He’s already being a doctor for a decade and he was really keen to share to me about what are the problems that always there forever and there’s a lot of opportunities to solve it.  

He shared about the doctor apps that’s being ‘trending now’ is not exactly solving the problem for him as a doctor nor the patient itself. He said as a doctor still needs to visit and diagnose the patient. If there’s any solution that can help with that, he said he will be thankful for that!

We talked about anything related hospitals, insurance and even on how the solution can make a great business impact!

So much thing to notes down and yes, there’s a lot of opportunities!

[frametoday]

Thank you, OLX Indonesia

Last week was my last day in OLX Indonesia. For two years (give or take), I've been through a lot of situation that can always made me face the fear inside me! Know how to say NO, communicate well with everyone across continent, going deep into the product and always be shipping. It was a great year and I am thankful for that. Well, you can say 'memorable'.

Also i learned about business. I don’t have any major in business and since I’ve worked here, my business acumen side is growing and this was the real deal. So much. Best part is, there's so much room to grow, both professionally and personally. I am so lucky that i have someone as an example! 

That's all you need!

So, why am I leaving? 

In this past nine years, As an employee, I’ve been working, switching multiple companies and got carried away with all the chronicles inside it. That was really great feeling to be a part of something big and give your time and passions to your work. 

On the other hand, since I started my way to technology as a designer/developer at my own hands and love to create something from scratch, I want to create product that useful for people. Something that can solve problem and have value. As my role also was a product manager, i need that craftsmanship alive. Also, everyone is doing something interesting in this beloved capital city, that also a trigger me to start something new. 

Before I start to jump and dive, I want to take a step back to gain new perspective. For start, something that I afraid of is meeting with new people. I want to erase that fear. So i plan to meet new great people in a new place! Create a network, exploring all the opportunities and learn from them. For the time being, I spend my time reading, learning and still ramping up my coding skill. 

I will set my time until Q2 this year to make it happen!

Thank you for the ❤️ and support. 

Rifie

[frametoday]

Joy Of Missing Out. A feeling when we ignore what is happening in internet life. The opposite is FOMO. Fear of Missing Out.

Which one are you?

[frametoday]

Freewriting #3 A reframing

Reframing. Instead of reacting with nonsense, let say.. anger, why don’t we step back and do analyze what we were thinking about with positive traits and bring you get back on your feet again.

I am trying this routine if I feel disappointed and things aren’t going according what i want. 

[frametoday]

Freewriting #2 - Hotel Transylvania 2

Amazing thing happened when you’re really enjoying your moment. I accidentally watch Hotel Transylvania 2 at Netfix and suddenly this movie is the best movie in my life. Why?

Because I watched with my daughter without any distraction at all. I’ve never seen my daughter really enjoyed her time watching movie with me. With me only. No phones, nobody, just us.

It touched me deeply that live the moment with your little one without overthinking, it is the best part of your life. Craft it! Make it count!

Thank you Vampa (”Vampire Grandpa! It’s obvious!”) for creating a wonderful time for us. 

[frametoday]

Freewriting #1 - Begin with the End in Mind

When you looked back at your day, today only. March 11th, 2019 It was a day that made you smile at the end of day. At the end of your daily routine and spontaneously from nowhere, someone made me laugh so hard and you feel obsessed a bit.  Oh I got carried away with the emotion. I feel there’s so much affection for myself. Grateful.

The best part is, i had set this day to be an uplifting and warm day. I realised that you just need the end in mind to start your day. It changes your mood. It’s up to you on how you have the ending. I choose to be a positive today and it is safe for me to say,

 It was a good day today, Rifie!.

[frametoday]

Morning at the Terminal 3 Soekarno-Hatta International Aiport.

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Even though tomorrow is Monday, I got dinner with the Mardiansyah on Sunday night 🤓 at Kota Kasablanca. I ate a bowl of rice lol this is the biggest portion of me eating rice in this past 2 months! lebay ah.

I met Sandy and Ayu while I am working at Plasa.com five years ago and they're becoming husband and wive probably 2 years ago.. hmm can't remember exactly but I didn't see any relationship while I worked at Plasa 😆 Talked about travels, plan to do some photo aggregation and our plans in this 3 months. They gave me a belated birthday present 🤓

[frametoday]

Day 2 in London. Tourist Style!

Day 2 in London yay! Where the jet lag still hanging! We woke up at 3am, felt fresh just like we want to work. I thought about it on why we feel fresh, probably it’s 9am in Jakarta time.

So, day 2. Of course we want to visit the clock! Big Ben and Buckingham Palace. 

We started the day at 8am, a clear day and chill weather to go out seriously! Since our neighbourhood was super quite and peaceful, we enjoyed our morning time while walking into station. I called it A Chillaxing Saturday Morning. Ahh.. fall already begin I supposed. 

You know, my first Yahoo! ID was waitingtofall means I wait the fall season to start on my life. The colors of the leaves fascinated me and see it begins to fall in to your feet, It’s beautiful. 

So Victoria Station it’s where all we began our trip for today. With help of Google Maps (thank you Google Maps! you just made our day easier) we can have a direction to go to Buckingham Palace, St. James Park and Big Ben in short time. 

But first, we need to have breakfast and coffee.

Since we fell in love with coconut latte at Pret a Manger (which become our favorite coffee shop in here, rather than Costa), we decided to have that again in this very morning. We bought that and tuna sandwich to take away. Bear in mind that the price that you dine-in and take away is different as 1 pound. It’s cheaper to take away rather than to eat in the place. Strange? yeah I still don’t understand. 

Warning : After this line, you will be see lots of my face and also my husband’s face on the photos. Pardon the narcissistic. You’ve been warned. :D

We took photos while we walked lol. 

Here we are at Buckingham Palace!

Yours truly photograph. Awesome as always, right? Ha ha ha.

We just sat down beneath the Victoria statue, drinking coconut latte and admiring the palace while we read about the history on the internet ha ha ha. You might called us poser but hey, we need to know the history about this place, right? 😁 

We also wondered on how Mr. Bean can disturb the palace guard on one of his episode. 

This place is so crowded, so please beware of your belongings!

To go to Big Ben, we must go via St.James Park. Famous park and also lovely that you can see swans, ducks or birds. I found squirrel that collecting acorn beneath the tree! St.James Park, as London has so many park, this one is one of the biggest park. Just take a walk through there, enjoy the view and disconnect from the world it's good enough. We sat on the bench and enjoying our tuna sandwich and the birds start to staring at us. 😁

Big Ben

Yet here we are!! There’s Big Ben for afar~ Do you noticed the grey steel surrounding the clock? Apparently, Big Ben is being renovate and guess what? No sound! no BONG! BONG! This clock still on silent mode until 4 years from now. So unlucky for both of us.

It’s a cloudy day but it’s still cool. Thames river well.. you’re cool too. The view was beautiful, just like in a Hollywood movie.

The Big Ben area also a crowded place too! Again, take care of your belongings! 

After we see the view of Thames River, Westminster, Golden Eye and Churcill statue, I was thinking, hey we’re on the most iconic things in the world! Must be good what to see inside. Well, actually you can go inside, just buy a ticket or buy a London Pass but we didn’t want to. We really want to enjoy the city by walking on this travel time. Ha Ha Ha.

Don’t forgot to mention the 10 Downing Street (Prime Minister’s lair), House Guard Palace even though we only see one guard with the horse. It’s kinda bit spooky to walk because it’s really quite area and the police was bringing guns. 

It’s near lunch time,  so we go to... Borough Market!! 

I’ve been following their Instagram account for a while and this market is a much visit if you like food like me ha ha ha. I’m curious to go there! So we took the tube to London Bridge station from Westminster station. 

Oh by the way, couple things about London are.. Not all station provide toilet. So you need a small tube map to inform you where is the nearest toilet. And please, bring your own water. Just because.

Since it’s a lunch time, the place is packed! Hmm.. or every time it’s packed? I don’t know fo sho but I was starving and need fooood.. Halal foood...~ So we find ourselves here, where every tent selling food. Either fruits, pastry or organic food. I couldn’t find oyster everywhere. I really want to eat that actually! 

There was also a pub, where everyone drink beer. They drink outside the pub, smoking and chat with their friends standing while the weather was pretty good. Cold a bit. 

No, we didn’t eat that sweet pies lol. We bought fruit instead. My husband is avid fan of fruits. So we tried a lots of fruit while in here. As for lunch, we found this pulled lamb stall and we were really interested to try that!! As you can see, there’s a lamb and rice! What could it be more perfect! So we ordered, for 8 pounds. large meal for us two.

You can eat anywhere and there’s no table by the way. Hahaha. In London so many supermarket and coffee shop selling ‘Food on The Go’. Like sandwich, bread that you can eat while you’re walking, but we’re Jakartans,  we need sometimes a proper way to eat lunch. But I don’t have major problem with eating. I once told my dad when I was teenager perhaps that human needs a capsule to eat and they can choose the flavor and while they’re eating that, human can have a full stomach.That was me, that time. 

And as for this lunch, still no dessert. 

Tower Bridge 

We were walking through to Tower Bridge, a strong and modern bridge. One of the iconic landmark in London. I loved how it looks!

We walked and talked a lot, doing P.D.A (lol not really) and enjoy the sunny weather once again on the area, see how many people jogging, eating ice cream, I turned off all notifications on my phone, no distraction, just enjoying the city life. It was good idea you know, turning off the notification. 

While we were walking, we saw probably three choppers fly above. Since the tube explosion we saw police everywhere and siren. My friend said that they’re increasing the security to critical. Well you got that right!

And I read the breaking news that they already caught the suspect.

What an awesome half day! So, for another half, we decided to go to Imperial War Museum.

You must go here if you want to know about World War. The histories were so detail and interactive. From torpedoes, Berlin Wall and the diorama on how many layers they need to go before they reached the wall (you need to survive and strive to go to the Wall), the Enigma machine and all about the war propaganda. The building has four floors while on the fourth floor is about Holocaust. I got goosebumps. No photos allowed. 

Finally an ice cream!

Well, we tired already but it was fun day, we spent the evening at Piccadilly, hanging out seeing people going here and there. For the dinner we chose Nando’s... You were our fav while in here. We ate on your restaurant three times and totally fond of the chicken. 

10pounds on half chicken and unlimited amount of sauce, surely this one was the answer for our dinner. Ha Ha Ha.

Long day in London. I am gonna write about Manchester and soon, Edinburgh, city that has a special place in our heart.

Thank you for reading

[frametoday]

UK day 1

Day one in London

Hi! We’re on London now and couldn’t be more excited to explore the city. I am gonna write anything that crossed in my mind, things that happened and some highlights from the day.

So just quick explanation about why we’re traveling to UK it’s actually a holiday for just two of us and it happened in September which is the month that I am having my birthday. You can say it’s a birthday trip but it’s more than just holiday, it’s the trip that we want to be closer to each other as a married couple, know each other more, a romantic gateway perhaps lol. Four years ago we went to Bali, Lombok and a small island called Meno (Gili Meno), you also can read the story in this blog.

So, here’s our story in London.

We arrived at London Gatwick airport, the 2nd largest airport in London at noon from Dubai International Airport. As we arrived, I checked my phone immediately (you know, I am doing this spontaneously of course) and my sister said on Whatsapp that there’s an explosion on London Tube. I checked Twitter and it’s true. Hope everyone is okay. Thank you for inexpensive XL Roaming package, I can online anytime! You know for doing Instagram Stories, see the Google Maps and other stuff. 

Line on the immigration as seriously long. It took us a while to get the permit to enter the country. The officer only ask three questions. Number one “What are you doing in UK?” Number two “Have you ever been in UK?” And number three “How many days you will spend on UK?”. After we answer all question, he stamped and give us the passport. Whoa finally!

So, apparently Gatwick is a very busy airport. The train station in Gatwick was very crowded with people who line up for buying ticket. Either on the machine or by manual. Pretty much disaster lol. Since I already know that don’t use Gatwick Express to London because it’s bloody hell expensive, instead we use Thameslink to get into London, St. Pancras station to be exact. Well, more 30 minutes added but we think it’s okay to save money on this.

And when i want to buy the ticket, that machine rejected my credit card lol. So I am using cash. 19.20 pounds for just two tickets. So the route was Gatwick - London st.Pancras using Thameslink. So off we go to Platform 4 and wait the train. What should be note here : be aware of what the announcer tells which one is the right train for you. Because lots of train using the same platform.

The train was very comfortable. Huge window and you can put your luggage beside you because the seating area is spacious. So no worries about the luggage.

Arrived at St. Pancras station probably at 4pm, we took a stroll around the area and feel the weather (It was light rain!). It’s not that cold, actually.  The area itself I think it’s’ like business area, people walking around with suites and work bag. We found Google office too! 

Also we took our time to read the Tube map while enjoying delicious coconut latte. Yeap it's coconut! Best thing ever! 

Underground

So it is time for us to take the Tube to our AirBnB. Apparently, it is on Northern Line and we took the Tube on King's Cross. We buy the Oyster card and popup the card for 5 Pounds in a machine so we don’t need to buy any single ticket yay! And if you already spent 6 Pounds for traveling with the card, either with bus or tube, the fare will be stop at 6 pounds in that day so you can go anywhere free after 6 pounds! Awesome right! 

On an underground station, you need to go down down and down until you find your platform. Here, you can feel the rush of people catching up the train, the wind blows in to your face and you can hear the announcer give info about security alert. 

Finally the train has arrived, we entered the tube and boy it's really compact. Like a tube with a seat inside. With a dominant white, the interior train is filled with colorful seat and ads. Made the train more colorful. Smaller than Singapore subway. And the handrail is navy blue. Nice modern design 

While riding the tube, there are no signal and all commuter just reading a book or newspaper, listening to the music or doing crosswords! When you’re in the tube, you can see any faces of Londoners!

So we arrived at the Colliers Woods station and walk for 10minutes to our AirBnB. On 6:30pm, it's cloudy and yet cold. It was very quite neighborhood i tell ya. We were dragging our two big luggages, the sound of the wheel was the only noise around the neighborhood. We also saw a football field. The area 

We finally met the host, Alissa and Dan. So apparently, the host also sleep in the same home with the guest here. Different from AirBnB in Asia, if there’s a guest, the host will stay at another house. The room was very nice and comfortable, so stylish and feels like a hotel room!

After that we go straight to take a hot shower and sleep!

That's the day 1.

[frametoday]

Being in We The Fest is one of my favorite thing in my life! Never fails me. 

I went to WTF with my sister, a great companion because we share same taste of music. I love her everyday since we grew older. 

I wished I can go with my friends but often time they don’t like this kind of thing. That’s why I don’t have much friend to invite. 

Phoenix was amazing, It’s my second time watching them live and boy it felt really good. What a surprise I met with Branco and Thomas Hedlund! Star struck, I remembered him as a Jacob lol. Who the hell was Jacob?

I also met Togi, my long time high school friend, Also Rico, he’s the co-founder of Urbain, Inc, a clothing company. You know, I think it was my fault on my high school time, I didn’t have any close friend so It’s hard to pick who were my closest friend on high school. I met Sila by the way. Friend from college time. We were close and yeah we still keep contact. You can read about her in this blog, we met one time at St. Budi building last year perhaps. 

Well, lt was a great moment to stop everything that come cross into my mind,