from-brooke

[from-brooke]

You broke us, like slicing a pill in half.

One part shattered, broken into pieces,

Like you left me.

The other, untouched and whole,

As if its division never existed.

[from-brooke]

Today I went through something shit. Absolutely senseless.

Friend are supposed to make you feel better. They are supposed to make things easier for you. If they are the cause of your stresses, then what’s even the point.

I’m not a kid. I know how to handle things and I need to do them in my own way, in my own time. I HATE, HATE people who feel like they’re entitled or people who make you feel like since they’re nice to you, you have to return the favour. I can’t stand it.

And as it that’s not enough, WHY THE FUCK IS SHE POSSESSIVE??????????????

[from-brooke]

You robbed me so much of myself than I had already lost. Do I give you the benefit of the doubt? That whatever you did, and however you did was for my own good. But if so, why did it hurt, if not more, than equally as much when everyone else who you had tried protecting me from left. Why did it feel so uneasy, so weird, and so disappointing? Why did I feel the same chains of anxiety wrapping themselves around my heart once more? Why did I feel so empty, so lost, utterly without direction? I guess I'll never learn. I need people to be in my life, but you couldn't be it, even after you promised me a billion times that you will be. I did not ask for that hope, I did not even ask for that helping hand you clasped around mine while I was drowning in. You offered it to me, you came to me. So why do I blame myself for this process one more time? You were my go to, my friend, my light, you were my thread.

And you robbed me of it. One last time.

[from-brooke]

I can't really blame my mother for what had happened, can I? I mean, if you look at it from her perspective, I left her alone in her time of need. She is not talking to me because I was rude and I chose someone else over her. But does it justify it? Does her oblivion suffice how I should and shouldn't be?

I understand why she did what she did, but she could have reached out. She's a mother. I thought that was synonymous to tenderness and affection... Guess I was wrong..

[from-brooke]

Brooke Davis Quotes

[from-brooke]

I know energy can neither be created nor destroyed;

But how do you explain killing me?

[from-brooke]

Healing is not linear

[from-brooke]

When I was a little girl, I used to think seeking therapy was just for the rich. I used to think of it as a "lifestyle" that was only taken on by people with snobbish attitudes, frowny faces and money at their fingertips. For me, it seemed like a luxury that was left only for the elite class to be adopted because they have "more problems."

At 23, I understand why I used to think so, and why it is important for me, and everyone else to see a therapist. I understand that there are so many issues that we carry unresolved from our childhood and into our adult life. Issues, that are seemingly little, 'part of our daily routine,' or dissed somewhere as we are growing up. Logic, denial and neglect often result in temporary bliss. Long term consequences come after the trial period is over, which is often when one is clueless. It is times like these that make me realize there are some problems too far gone for us to handle on our own.

And that's when I knew that therapy was never a luxury. It has always been a necessity. For everyone, but only availed by the fortunate ones.

[from-brooke]

Maybe stringing words is not for me, but why is it that I only find comfort in creating obnoxiously long sentences that announce the death of my emotions? Why is it that everytime I pick up a pen, I feel a little more alive, a little more hopeful that maybe, just maybe, afterlife isn't here just yet?

[from-brooke]

It's very easy for people to assume that you're fine when you are able to mask the feelings well. But just because you have mastered the art of deception, doesn't mean you are truly okay. Especially when it comes to people. They always hurt you, I think at this point everyone has accepted it. One way or the other, every single person in your life is going to hurt you somehow. But that doesn't make it any easier. Regardless of the relationship you have with that person, you will want to get closer, seek validation, expect and want love. There's no denying it. And when that person leaves, it shatters you. It breaks you to your core. Especially when you are letting go. But letting go of the person doesn't mean letting go of everything else that came along. That's what haunts you. What is left behind. The sad part is, there is nothing you can do about it. And even sadder is the fact that even though everyone knows, no one understands it.

[from-brooke]

Snapchat memories is like poison.

[from-brooke]

Fucking fuck

[from-brooke]

[from-brooke]

[from-brooke]

[from-brooke]

What exactly am I here for? And why exactly is my existence such a problem? Like you know I'm trying so hard to ignore everything that I'm hearing, buy it doesn't get easier. Listening to it everyday doesn't make it any easier. It kills me and aches me to hear the kind of words and terms she is using for me. And who the hell even is she to label me or tell me what I should and shouldn't be doing. She keeps ranting to me about how many time she welcomed me when I needed to have a home, but really she doesn't know shit. For real. How the hunger and indigestion affected me, she doesn't know.

Sub ko apni apni takleef dikhti hai, kisi ko samne walay ki kahani sun k dard nahi hota, khaas torr pe apkay apne. Kisi ko has aur ehsaan jata k achayi ya naiki nahi ki jaati.

[from-brooke]

My grandmami always told me to live for others. "No man compares to that who lives for others," she says. I have seen everyone in my family take her advice very seriously, living, surviving, tolerating, suffering, for the sake of others. However, when I sit down with her, even for a while, I know she has a hole in her heart. An emptiness, something that cannot be filled. I have tried asking her if she has lived her life the way she wanted, then why she is still grieving. I have tried asking this question from many in my family, but none of them have been able to answer. And I can't help but wonder, what if, the entire formula is wrong? What if there is nothing that comes out of vicarious living other than pain and hurt? Because if that is all we're getting, why not try living for ourselves and hurt different?