fxxyrxsy

[fxxyrxsy]

You vanished, like a ghost,

haunting me, calling it grace,

for my patience, was too sharp,

for someone hiding behind,

"That is a different question."

[fxxyrxsy]

I paint in magenta, and luscious lavender,

in a forced attempt to, wash my crooked canvas,

but the colors seep through,

dripping onto their flat, righteous pristine floors.

[fxxyrxsy]

I’d rather stand this alone,

spine straight, with howling fire,

discomfort may transpire.

Let them call me difficult,

let them call me very strange,

not here for applause anyway.

I'm a blade against the grain,

this world, so unwelcoming,

I'll make my mark any day.

[fxxyrxsy]

They view you as fragile, too reliant,

too much, you're locked upon your own island,

but only because they cannot face you,

stitched within their own skin, are the hues.

They will once become what they so despise,

deep seas catch the blues, break into demise.

[fxxyrxsy]

Owning the right to be unhappy,

as the only truth left within,

the weight of existence,

a whisper I wear like skin.

[fxxyrxsy]

I'm the shadow in the hall,

a silence that answers nothing.

To be unseen is to be real,

and in that darkness,

I find myself.

[fxxyrxsy]

All I need is one,

love who notices my jagged edges,

and then doesn't flinch.

Someone who isn't afraid of the dark,

carried in my chest,

or the light I've hidden right beneath it.

[fxxyrxsy]

Perfection is a cage,

I am too wild to fit.

I'm the imperfection,

in questions unanswered.

The echo of a truth,

no one dares to speak book.

[fxxyrxsy]

Acceptance, very freeing,

for placement and nuance,

the quiet rebellion,

knowing who you really are,

liberation, in your heart.

[fxxyrxsy]

We all get a go,

at planting seeds in the soil

too rocky for roots.

with all of these broken tools.

[fxxyrxsy]

Once that last day comes,

will they still call you the exception at all?

Or will they finally just admit that,

The world they built,

wasn't meant for people, who feel at all?

[fxxyrxsy]

Fate isn't mine to claim,

I'm too flawed to wear that crown, so I act,

in wake of each step, shadows that are left,

get watered down, by my desire,

for death, is my name,

in vain, I remain.

[fxxyrxsy]

We will never be able to change pain,

nor the ones who contributed to it,

Be aware where they stand, not in your world.

In theirs, where their light is enough to burn,

without ever feeling any torment,

of being ripped, and dimmed from within.

[fxxyrxsy]

I'm greatly entertained, by my own pain.

They can't relate, their façade on display.

Once the flag is raised, pleading, too late,

the feel of black, seeps into their own skin,

the very taste of death, leaks from within.

[fxxyrxsy]

9457

Perhaps I don't see any merit,

Under the veil,

Now I'm a sceptic,

Knowledge won't hide in my eyes.

[fxxyrxsy]

I don't desire your pity or much love,

just a glance that says, you are real, my dear,

you are permitted to be and to feel,

I don't desire much, yet it's too much,

an ache to be seen, not having to bleed.

[fxxyrxsy]

I stare into the mirror, it stares back as my mother.

Static is spreading across, broken fragments surfacing.

Each one a scar from my mom, my mom's hands, my grandmother.

Each spike a whisper of choice, survival is in our blood,

All of those scars, salt and wear, I can't wipe clean with a cloth,

I can't fix broken glass staring at a past, with mere thoughts.