generaldumbness - Tumblr blog

[generaldumbness]

My partner told me last night that I bring a Gomez Addams energy to our relationship, and I think that's the kindest thing I've ever heard from a lover ever.

[generaldumbness]

Since like I never post anything and no one views follows me here anyway... I'm over my food poisoning and currently stoned off my ass. I'm going to be with my wife and 2 girlfriends this week. (Individually. Get yer head out the gutter.) I'm having people I never expected asking for my time, and I'm down 7 lbs.

If you think I'm bragging, fuck you. I totally am. I've been on a 48 year losing streak and right now it's pretty goddamn good to be me.

[generaldumbness]

[generaldumbness]

I only have one word for people who look at me like some kind of sex object:

Hi.

[generaldumbness]

Being the introverted hopeless romantic with a high sex drive is a curse

[generaldumbness]

Are you being shelved?

What is it to be shelved? When a partner disappears from your dynamic for days/weeks at a time, and returns to pick it back up when it is convenient to them, you are being shelved.

What will happen to me if I am being shelved?

When someone builds strong trust and expectations with you, and then suddenly vanishes and treats you in a careless offhand way, your psyche reels, and struggles to come to terms with the dissonance between the love and dynamic you were promised, and the reality that you have become someone’s D/s booty call. I find the answer the psyche comes up with is, “I am not worthy of more than I am getting.”, and a gradual degradation of your personal value starts to take place. If you don’t have a lot of personal value to begin with, you are especially susceptible to being shelved. Without a partner to celebrate and engage you in your role, you will come to believe you must be a bad sub/dom. It’s the only explanation your brain has for the disappearances. “If I was a good dom/sub, they would be invested in me.”, is common psychology among people who get shelved.

How will it end?

You will be ghosted. To be ghosted is to have a partner disappear on you entirely, and never come back. Being ghosted often is the last nail in the coffin of someone’s personal value. It is devastating to have someone who convinced you that they would love and care for you abandon you. Yes I know they will ghost you. That’s how the script always ends. People tire of games, and like to move on to play with new ones. If you are a thing that can be shelved to someone, you are a thing can and will be forgotten eventually. I guarantee it.

The Irony…

People who shelve and ghost have a fundamental problem with how they view other people. Shelving is abusive. Shelving is red flag behavior for toxic narcissism and misogyny. People who shelve are ugly and broken, but suffer very little as they pick up and put down people and relationships.

It’s the victims who suffer. Having just one of these experiences can cause you damage and trauma. Having just one of these experiences can cause you to question yourself and your role for years to come. Don’t put up with being shelved. You are the only one who will suffer if you do.

[generaldumbness]

[generaldumbness]

I feel confident enough to post these now. A collection of all the existing posters after some edits from the other post that got 13k notes! These are full size/quality. Go nuts.

You may use them for wallpapers, tabletop campaigns, whatever. Consider tipping me or buying a print or sticker on ko-fi here! If you do use them, let me know what for, or send pictures!

[generaldumbness]

When you wonder why no one interacts with your posts, and then you realize half your followers are porn bots and the other are blogs that haven't updated for 5 years.

[generaldumbness]

Ok, hear me out. Romance novels in the style of choose your own adventure.

[generaldumbness]

French trans woman Marie-Pierre Pruvot, known by her stage name Bambi

Female Mimics magazine 1965

[generaldumbness]

so so tired of people acting like it's taboo/embarrassing/shameful to be attracted to a fat person

i am fat and complete strangers have accused people i've dated of being chubby chasers, fat fetishists, or have just generally made rude comments about there being a size difference in the relationship

if you find a fat person attractive you really do not need to preface it with a "hear me out" or "this is so embarrassing, but" in fact. don't do that with anybody. please do not contribute to this weird attitude surrounding fatness and fat bodies

[generaldumbness]

Honey I'm really sorry but while you were out I found a nest of WASPs in the back garden and as I was going in to get chemicals to deal with it I accidentally left the door open and a WASP got into the house and now he's flying around calling our air friar a romanist while the air friar yells at him about heresy

[generaldumbness]

hello, i hope you’re well!

do you think that the studios’s refusals to acknowledge the sag-aftra and wga strikes will lead to protests in the french way?

You mean with tongues?

[generaldumbness]

#So the cat's on ICQ?

Sound on

[generaldumbness]

I spent so long being a sad lonely teenager that I find it hard to believe people actually want to have sex with me