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[grimoirevol2]

Eyeless.

Well... this news is a bit saddening to some of you, but we’re putting off updating the Grimoire for a bit. At the moment, the odds of the Grimoire reaching the sight of a celestial, let alone the sight of another human, well... they’re not exactly ideal.

But that’s not quite why we’re halting. Not altogether, anyway.

We misinterpreted some things on the internet. What people value more than information is safety. Peace of mind. Relevancy. At the moment our second volume of the Grimoire appears none of the three: in fact, it may be putting people across the globe in more danger.

The Grimoire started off fun. It was a new avenue for the Agency. We like to talk to people, we like to protect them, and we like to discuss openly.

But, lately, we’ve learned just how dangerous that can be.

Our current focus, the anonymous informant known as “Guardia”, has been doing just that. By disseminating information about hazardous topics, they are actively throwing people into dangerous areas, by guiding them to monsters, or spreading the activities of covens, or transporting people to other planes of existence.

We are effectively doing the same thing through the Grimoire, and we do not want that. We need to rethink our efforts.

Thus, all of us: ALL of the cryptic allies of the Agency are placing a state of artefact lockdown. It’s too dangerous to continue as is.

We’ll be taking a few weeks to reset and find a better way of using the Grimoire.

In the mean time, we lock the Grimoire, Volume 2, away for further events.

In the mean-time... please share this Grimoire. We must find another celestial. We believe there are at least three dozen on Earth other than us. They will not have put themselves out there in the open.

But we believe they’re there.

So if you are a celestial, let us know.

Thank you, all of you. If we never open this online chapter of our lives again, just... thanks.

-

“Six” The Devil

“Seven” The Angel

Sally Darling and the Church of St. Cherry

Jarrett Loon and the Wolf Valley Police Department

Rebecca, Pearl, and Dania Curlew of the Great Camp Guild

Mayor Muttley Dog and the People of Wolf Valley, NY

“Alert” and Their Crew at Sarah Sanctuary

Harriet Kolva and Ark №53 of the Red Nail

Kahríton “Do-Tell” Kyle Nashvill

and “Notarius” of the Agency

[grimoirevol2]

Lesson 4: Magic.

This is Seven talking. Howdy. (Jeez, it’s been a long week.)

The Grimoire’s inbox has been fairly dusty, although we’ve still been busy behind the scenes working on investigating this Guardia fellow. So far nothing has come up that we’d like to disclose just yet (and it might be a while, given as how they’re probably reading this blog  right now). But we’re going to talk a little about something they’re seemingly already knowledgable about.

That’s right, we’re wasting their time by teaching you things about magic!

Our lesson today concerns the basics of magic. We’ll eventually go deeper into specific kinds of magic, but for now, you have to start somewhere.

Magic, as so eloquently put by Merriam-Webster, is “an extraordinary power or influence seemingly from a supernatural source”. It allows one to perform miraculous things, such as talk to dead bodies, light your hair on fire, or make your household appliances different colors.

I’m being coy, of course. Magic is incredibly useful once you have some effects down, and learning has given us a pastime for the past… 45 years… ish?

As we described in the past, everything that can think freely for itself is carried by invisible “strings” of fate. To quote myself: “In this metaphor, the strings are each of the forces of the world by which we move, or in a celestial’s case, are driven to duty.”

Now, just like any particle in the multiverse, each of those invisible, untouchable strings have an impulse and a direction when you move them. Collectively, the impulses and directions of your strings make up your “priorities”. I’m not using that word in the “I have to go buy eggs and milk later” context. The “priorities” you form with your strings define your limits, physically. It’s why you don’t accidentally rip your arm off every time you open a door. Your “priorities” prevent you from doing so. In a way, you could even think of it psychologically. When we’re all in our right minds, we usually don’t think that killing anyone is a good idea. That’s your priorities talking, in a metaphysical way.

Objects form their own priorities, although these are more driven by the laws of physics and nature because they aren’t living. Think of it like a video game’s status conditions. Anything in the freezer has the “frozen” priority. Anything in a fire has the “hot” priority.

Now say one were to force anything in the world to create a new “priority”. That’s magic, at the basest level. The priorities of a cup sitting on a shelf can be appended to to include “aggressive to intruders”, and BAM! You have a bunch of porcelain shards in a thief’s eyes.

The limits of “priorities” also limit magic. So, you can’t change a human’s condition to “sick” or “blind” with magic, because that conflicts with other priorities that say “they’re perfectly healthy” and “their eyeballs work fine”. “Conflicting priorities” like those described above are the major thing preventing all mages from basically taking over the world governments.

And, that’s also why you can’t just weave a string of words at a school bully and have them leave you alone. You have to CHUCK A FIREBALL at them to fix that problem.

Now that you understand the limits of magic, we’ll leave you with one more bit of broader information.

Magic requires five things, which the Magi International Board (MIB) describes as the C.O.R.G.I. system. Named for the dog, of course, because Welsh magicians bred the first corgis as a joke gift back in 1100 AD. Not even kidding. Why else do you think they shed everywhere?

Circumstance: Generally defined as the number of coincidental occurrences, allowing a spell to be stronger without any extra energy. For example, syncing time, syncing date, repeating words incidentally, or the effects of previously cast spells.

Object: The target of a spell. By casting a spell you want to influence the “priorities” of a thing. Keep in mind this is only where the spontaneous creation of priorities will occur, not how the spell will continue to be used by the caster. For an fireball, for example, you have to target “the air above your hand”. The target then determines the necessary energy reserve.

Reserve: Some amount of energy, or a separate source of energy, which will be used to fully achieve the goal of a spell. This is another MAJOR bit of difficulty, and why a lot of civvies never get into magic. You need a lot of power to reliably control an effect.

Goal: The goal of a spell’s effects. Fairly simple. How do you want to alter the target’s priorities?

Intention: The amount of force put behind the spell. Abstractly, this is “how much you mean it”. This is different from the power of a spell, and is more determined by your willpower and the spell’s variability. 

Once you establish how you’re going to get all of those things, you also should have a spellbook on hand. Spell pages are written by master wizards and witches who have attempted a particular effect so many times that they can essentially write dissertations on the proper usage and “thought process” required to safely create an effect. Think of it like reading a book on philosophy, although once you’re done you could probably use the book’s teachings to safely create a temporary mini-sun.

That’s about it. I went on a little long there, didn’t I? Eh, magic is a little passion of ours at the Agency. It’s a lot easier for me and Six since the R in C.O.R.G.I. doesn’t tend to stop us from casting most minor effects, thanks to our aura. So we like to experiment with what we can pull off without bringing in our actual proper celestial powers.

Hey, maybe auras will be next week’s lesson? Who knows?

See you all around. Stay safe. - ⑦

[grimoirevol2]

Lesson 3.1: Myth.

Hey again, everybody. How are you all doing? Oh, a devastating hurricane is making a beeline for the East Coast? Not that well, considering? Well, good luck with that! Don’t die! Stay saaaafe!

I figured that it was learning time once again after we were out on the 4th and were taken over the week prior. So, what better lesson to start us back up than to explain the planar structure of the world?

As I’ve said, the world is based on a structure of planes, basically meaning each of the “spheres” that make up the world are specific layers of existence that coexist with one another. The myth that created each of these planes is told widely among magicians and celestials, but there’s no harm in informing you all, too!

First, we’ll start with the plane you all know and love: the World of the Living, or more traditionally referred to by celestials as Mund (moon’d). Although perhaps you don’t want me to tell you how your world works, since scientists know a lot about all that. How about I tell you something you probably don’t know?

This plane is the start of everything. In the time before time, before a Big Bang, it was occupied by only one thing: the “First Star”, which never aged and never wilt, for it knew no concept of time. This unending object was comprised of a single, infinitessimal force, but when it became split when time was introduced to Mund, it learned the concept of an “end”. Think of it how a song will never progress or end if it is slowed to 0 BPM. But when a song is at even 1 BPM, it can play through and have an end. Celestials believe that time was introduced to the First Star as a result of some other world, beyond our reach, managed to touch the Star in some way. But we’ll never know for sure, given that this single-plane began to expand… and fast.

The First Star’s end, aka the Big Bang, set everything, inside Mund and out, into motion. Of note was that its unending brightness and energy at the advent of the Big Bang became the concept of an “eternal memory” or “eternal light”, a force beyond description which was effected naught by time. When this eternal light was shining out into the void of the newborn Mund, it broke through the barriers of time on that plane and, like breaking through a window, exploded outward. This “explosion”, first off, created a “crater”, just outside of Mund.

This crater became known as the plane we call Leyland: the plane known as Transit by celestials. This plane exists patently outside of the rules of “reality”. It knows a loose concept of time, which is constantly in flux and risks self-contradiction. But it knows no reality unless thought is given to it. There must be “reality enforcers”, even today. This is why Transit and the beings which came to reside there are deeply tied to the mystical, for the plane was created by the intense and once-infinite light and energy of the First Star.

At some point, the light faded in Transit, the explosion which broke time finally reaching an end. At two distinct points, through enantiodromia (which I’ll save for a later lesson), the force of light and time combined faded significantly in a big way. One represented the “eternal progression” (the universal expansion or progression), and one reprented the “eternal stagnation” (the unchanging laws of reality and the inevitable end). At each of those points, the Highest and Lowest points in the multiverse were established, and from those points, the intense energies sprouted new universes. These points were inextricably linked back to Mund’s shadow, cast in all directions by the burnt out First Star.

The shadow became the realm of Purgatory (or more generically, Death), which linked to the “life and death” of the First Star, became the resting place of all things which had found no way to go on. At the same time, at the Highest point in the multiverse, the plane Aetherial was made, and at the Lowest point, the plane Nitherward. This disparity between Highest and Lowest created the concept of goodness and badness, which became linked to the survival and failing of endeavors and processes across the multiverse. In essence, this force became what we call Absolutia -- absolute fate, one way or another, of every little outcome in the planes formed directly by the light of the First Star: the “planes after death”.

Oh, and these planes would later take on names according to the scripture of the deceased soul (or would remain generic if they believed in no higher being): in Christian tradition, for example, Aetherial became Heaven, and Nitherward, Hell.

The First Star’s light eventually faded in both planes, but the light had taken on some form to survive as long as it could, raging against time (and the dying of the light, too, I suppose). If Absolutia would give everything a fate, enantiodromia would result in a being without a set fate. These were the first immortam, beings which use Mund, their original homeplane, as a source of power to maintain themselves near infinitely. If they could not, they would cease to exist.

These immortam, which go unnamed aside from the simple title “Gears of the Universe”, eventually (over hundreds of millions of years) created the first celestials -- the original stars -- through their limited influence on gravity drawing particles together across the universe. This was all fated as soon as Aetherial and Nitherward were formed, due to Absolutia.

Once living beings gained sight and thoughts and minds, religion spread, and with it, more immortal beings emerged, slinking forward from the blinding light of Aetherial or the overwhelming darkness of Nitherward. These immortal beings would create their own celestials, adapt and split into other beings over time, and spread their influence. To maintain the multiverse, celestials who failed to follow their duty would be dispatched not only to Mund, but to Purgatory as well, creating psychopomps which would properly guide the alarmingly rapidly increasing populations across the multiverse to Aetherial or Nitherward.

That, in essence, is the roots of this world. Everything else is… well, one of three things. Science, Transit mysticism, or deific magic. We’ll… uhm… get to all of that, in due time.

Well, I hope this was elucidating, kiddos! And hey! Don’t be afraid to ask us whatever you please! We won’t bite. - ⑥

[grimoirevol2]

Carn.

Yes, we’re finally back. It’s us. To stay, this time. (As long as we can.)

This is Seven. We’re glad to be home, so we’re going to compile everything we learned about the figures who broke into this blog temporarily using a spell. This Grimoire entry will constitute our moratorium on Carn for now. The arc is “over”, I guess you might say.

Please, don’t forget to ask us questions if you’re curious about anything we’ve mentioned here. In addition, please consider joining our Discord if anything urgent goes down and we cannot report on it here.

It’s going to be a long post. I think its our longest yet at 2200 words or so. We’ll add a break after this introduction so that the Grimoire doesn’t get overwhelmingly long.

The backstory.

Elcarn Jin (el-cahrn jyne) was an elf who had been recorded as arriving on this plane (constituting XPA09) using the ley line ‘Iagon Maenour’, apparently in 2015, along with several other naufragé beings constituting his “troupe”. This included ‘Yikes’, a pharye with an intense love for artistry, and ‘Fold’, a female dullahan seeking penitence for sin. Carn later confessed that there were 4 other companions, but they have either left him (leaving their mention unnecessary) or were disintegrated by Carn’s own hand. He claims his time in Leyland was long, boring, and terribly droll, not worth telling.

(For the record, ‘Iagon Maenour’ is our ley line.)

As an elf, Carn’s primary motivation appeared to be to carve out his own corner of the world. Elves are known to be very possessive people, so wherever Carn could sit down and find his own food meant everything was good… until it wasn’t anymore. See, because most naufragé were formed by sentient life energy, they do have a need for fulfillment, in any form. They need “progression”. Unlike celestials, they aren’t content with a duty where they just do the job forever, until they can no longer do it. They want more.

In 2017, Carn’s troupe began hunting elsewhere. He began expanding, searching inside his dominion for more tracts of land that he could use for his hunts. He searched south, following the ley line using the rivers of the area, and eventually came upon NY 3. Here, Carn learned that he and his troupe had to blend in better.

Eventually, he said, through trial and error and hitchhiking, in January of this year, they came upon Wolf Valley, staying at Grayskull Motel using an old converted ice-cream van, which Carn says they stole from a junkyard and restored to working order using spells. They had slipped into our town right under our noses, using their natural abilities to appear more human. They had been paying for everything using the same method they used to restore the van (even though the cash was faked, it would need close inspection to uncover its falsehood).

We didn’t catch their scent because it was around this time that we had been investigating the return of a particular clan of lycanthropes to the town, and on February 2, there was a particularly brutal battle in the Hotel Wolfen, that eventually spilled out onto the street where we achieved victory easier. Evidently, Carn saw us fighting that day, and although he knew he wanted this town for himself, knew the troupe couldn’t stay around our town without us noticing.

He backed off for a while. The troupe lived out of the van, traveling up and down NY 3, hunting when they had to and passing into Canada using magic when they had to. This is probably why in March we noticed that there was a Hell of a lot of disturbances on the ley line during that time, which we had attributed to Pearl Curlew (Rebecca’s daughter) attempting to control her magic. But obviously, that was only part of it.

In May, we traveled to Canada to investigate an unrelated invasion far north along the ley line. It was at this time that they discovered how they might teleport along the ley line. After we’d returned from Canada, we were told by a state trooper through the police that a vehicle, a restored ice-cream truck, had been abandoned at the nearby convenience stop for several days, and had been relocated to an impound lot downstate. Carn confessed this was almost immediately after they realized that they could teleport in such a manner, although spells of this sort are very taxing and result in exasperation for weeks on end.

The break-in.

In August, of course, I began this Grimoire after reminiscing about the one we’d lost. It was at this point that the troupe seemed to have remembered we existed. This is an unknown. We’ve had no idea how they came back across us, but it’s not like we were trying to hide.

On Tuesday, August 28th, as we were returning home that night on foot from a monthly Town Hall meeting, we noticed that the Church’s power was out. As we walked up, we realized that Sally, the keeper of the church, was nowhere to be found. It was very peculiar to us. In the quiet night, amidst the crickets, we suddenly heard a very loud BANG sound, almost like a gunshot, come from the back of the church. We dashed in and then upstairs. Sally was holding a large knife, probably from Six’s stuff, and upon seeing us she dropped it and collapsed in exhaustion.

She explained to us, after calming down, that several beings had broken into the church’s upper floors (the Agency), breaking the ward that Rebecca had placed on our window and dashing away with something black and rectangular. One quick search later, we realized Six’s fucking phone was gone. Of all the valuable things, they took that. I would’ve thought they were a human attacker by stealing something monetarily valuable, but Sally assured us that these things weren’t from how they appeared to her.

After Yikes’ last post, we searched our records for everything on Carn. We didn’t have anything for a name like that, although his actions (using subordinates, playing arbitrary games, condemning people who do not play his games correctly) were telltale signs of an elf on the warpath.

Since we were obviously hacked, I texted Rebecca to try and log in. When she couldn’t, I panicked. There was no way I was going to lose another Grimoire, let alone Six’s phone. She texted me back after my minor panic attack that they mentioned a warding spell, and their repeated use of the word “YOU” was emblematic of a spell’s maintenance.

After searching the woods for a bit by doing some flyovers, we deduced it’d probably be best for us to continue the search the next morning. That’s when the “gift” at midnight on the 29th was released.

They were recording Six’s phone playing a old-timey tune.

I quickly recognized that they were begging us to find the phone. After some deduction we followed a foot trail into the woods.

To make a long story short, we found the phone at around 12:35 AM, and the song “The Girl in the Little Green Hat” playing on repeat. It had to be telling us something. This was a very obviously a game by an elf who was trying to be very obvious.

The search.

We regained our energy through rest after that. Our investigation into these individuals began almost as soon as Rebecca put up that post warding the Grimoire in kind.

The most boring part of any investigation is interpreting every clue as fact and trying to draw a plan of attack to an enemy you can’t find. So I’ll cut to the chase.

The song was used to lead us to a particular glen in the forest. We knew they were spellcasters. They broke the ward without making a sound, something only a celestial using their aura or a naufragé using their mind could. Considering their motives and commonality, and Sally’s eyewitness account, we were quick to recognize the threat as a naufragé rather than a celestial.

The glen had something to do with everything going on, right? We went there and realized quite quickly it rested on the leyline, and nearby we found a number of memorabilia, undoubtedly from the thief’s escapades and travels, as well as a lot of convenience-store food (and associated receipts), from various points along Route 3 and Canada beyond it.

They were living in that glen for at few weeks before making an attack. And that’s when I remembered. After I answered the question about being okay on August 14th, and knowing that they could consume our full attention, it was likely at this point that the thieves began planning their return to Wolf Valley. After all, we’re their major roadblock, so it only makes sense to make themselves known in a very public attack towards us, so they could try and get us out of the way. And they can only be very publicly known by knowing as well that our guard was down at the very end of the month.

See, we weren’t super inclined to make this a high-priority case, because by our counts they hadn’t done anyone any harm, and we’d retrieved Six’s phone, seemingly the only thing they took. Before Rebecca made that post in the morning, we dropped by the police station and learned essentially that there were no other incidents that had occured that night.

But something about them striking the Grimoire rubbed me the wrong way. They wanted the attention of everyone. And considering they were willing to leave behind their camp and use magic, they were important.

We uncovered a teleport signature that led us on their tail to Canada. From there the story gets a lot less interesting, so we’ll cut forward to how we took them down.

In New Brunswick, we cut them off as they were trying to escape to the Atlantic Ocean. After reading our post when we were back in Wolf Valley, they surely were afraid of coming after us, so they decided to flee to the ocean and get back to their homeground eventually.

Naturally, that didn’t happen. We found them hiding out in Flatlands, a small one-road town about an hour from the ports to the sea. They were probably trying to shake us off their trail by being in such a small town with proximity to an escape route, but having three naufragé in one concentrated area kind of draws you straight to them.

The troupe.

The troupe was defeated quickly after that. So, this is the part where we explained who we eliminated and how.

‘Yikes’, the creature who spoke on Carn’s behalf, is a pharye (far-yeh) - an antiquated creature once mistaken for fairies, hence the name. Standing 2 feet tall and humanoid, a pharye has a knack for leadership and guile, especially among non-magic creatures, even though they come off as overly posh or bright. When a pharye bends the knee, it is usually only to service their own goals of survival, longevity, and eventual subjugation, like an apprentice attempting to overthrow their master. Pharyes have a strong sense of justice, but not a strong sense of good or ill. One might call them the ultimate “lawful neutral”. They give themselves overly poetic names that cannot be stated in most human language. Yikes was very typical of their kind, from what we saw of her. 

Yikes escaped our capture by diving into the Restigouche River, but, because of knowledge we have on pharyes, we expect she will reappear sooner rather than later. We’re keeping our collective eyes out.

‘Fold’ was a female dullahan, a vengeful spirit seeking penitence for some sin committed in life. A dullahan is an undead which was killed through beheading, escaping Purgatory by wandering aimlessly without their head. In the World of the Living, they regain their head until they achieve their goals, which are typically to discover the fate of their killer or atone for the sin that brought them to death. Like most undead, dullahans are versed in future-sight, although their fortunes tend towards whatever vision contains the most spectacle. As such, Fold was probably supposed to see us coming, hence them settling in Flatlands. However, she did not properly predict her own failure. Fold was banished in combat back to Purgatory.

‘Carn’ was an elf. We’ll tell you more on them (and their varied kind) for this month’s Monster File on September 19th. However, this post alone should tell you a great deal on who they are and their motives for doing so. Carn was bound with a spell to extract most of the information for this post, then banished to Leyland.

Finally, there was another name which came up in our investigation. The name was ‘Guardia’. Carn thoroughly denied knowing anything of them, but they appear to be leaking information on magic and the other planes to the internet through backchannels and deleted posts. We have no idea where they are or who they are, but they’re somehow responsible for whatever the Hell’s going on. They were not present anywhere in the investigation, but their name was mentioned among the troupe’s things.

We’re looking into Guardia, whoever they are, for now.

Keep safe, everyone. - ⑦

[grimoirevol2]

Brief check-in.

Hello again, everyone. We’re back for today.

We’ll have an update ready for you on the investigation into Carn and his goons hopefully in a few days. We’re still hot on the trail of this investigation, although we’ve taken a day to relax a bit and plan through our next action.

With this day of downtime, we’ve created an official Discord server for investigators, following our attempted interviews of Oreb using the service. We’ll start posting there, so if you aren’t on Tumblr, I suggest referring there for new posts every once in a while. Our notary will be watching over the server while we do more thorough investigative work. We’ll be trying to keep you all in better know from this point onwards, although it seems more recently that we keep wrapping ourselves up in our work to a point where we can’t do anything online.

Regardless of how often we get sidetracked, we’ll try to take time today to answer more questions if you have any. Please send them this way.

We both love you all. And for our sakes, try to stay out of trouble. -  ⑦

[grimoirevol2]

Guard.

This is Rebecca Curlew, resident witch, mother, and police sergeant of Wolf Valley. Sorry to be the third non-investigator posting on this blog in recent history, but I come on their behalf to engage a bit of formalities, namely safe-guarding the blog against a fiasco like last night.

At the moment the investigators are off... emergency-investigating. This blog will be inactive in their absence (since they went further north, they don’t have any sort of cell service for the time being). But two of us on the force been entrusted with the passwords to their email and this blog in case of emergencies like this: myself, and Lieutenant Loon. Both of us have been friends to the investigators since we were kids.

We won’t be speaking much in their absence since communication will be sparse between us. But they said they were chasing what looked to me like a three-day lead. If it takes longer, don’t panic. They’re handling it.

Just to give you all a brief catchup: last night at 8:08 PM, another entity broke in to this Grimoire. They changed passwords on both the email account and this account. They answered three questions sent to the blog and then logged out. They had scheduled another post, which went live at midnight. The entity called themselves “Yikes”, and their master “Carn”.

Then at 8:08 AM this morning, the passwords of both accounts switched back. Their mentioning of a spell in one of their posts basically confirmed for me that I needed to find a ward. So I did. And that’s what I’ve been setting up around this particular post. Hopefully, if I do it right, it should block out any further posts or interference until I drop the ward when the investigators return. This is merely a preventative measure.

They also wanted to share that if you see this blog anywhere else, to look for users named “Guardia”. They suspect their lead is being tainted by some other user.

Oh! That’s my cue. 9:09 PM. Ta-ta. -  Ⓡ

(EDIT 8/31/18: They’ve returned to town. They’ve calmed down a bit and told me to drop the ward, even though they’re still looking into Carn. Consider the ward dropped. I’ve also tagged this post properly.)

[grimoirevol2]

https://drive.google.com/open?id=1qDKbdlQI_annW7RThT-xq55FHlSndT9m

THE POET’S PARTING TUNE, FOR NOW. WE MAY PLAY AGAIN ANOTHER NIGHT, PERHAPS.

DISREGARDS, ℭ

[grimoirevol2]

what's your name?

oh my!you caught me.i dont know how to answer this one with a straight face. the master says i cant say why exactly but he says trying to answer that might be real interesting on the eyess end. and i do love talking about myself.if you want to say my name, you kind of have to do that sound humans make when they suddenly realize that some tragedys just occurred but you dont know how to react because you didnt know or dont really actually care, and the description of the tragedy was just too gruesome not to give comment. or like, you see an owl with a mouse in its beak, and the mouse is kind of halfway dead already and kinda oozing down the front of the feathersso…. yikes can do for now. call me yikes.im sure the master will tell me a better name soon.

oh, and that was your last question. woops, sorry, games over. looks like thats all you get to learn about us for now. i hope you all had fun. at 8:08 AM eastern our spell will break and this account will return to your beloved celestials and ill be elsewhere. however ill try to post something extra at midnight since the master said i did a good job writing inside this fun opportunity. oh wait he just clarified, he meant you all did a good job not asking the correct questions. he says maybe if theres more of you you could ask things more correctly. oh, my. i blessed him for giving me this cool opportunity to break in and say hi. he said i needed to work on predicting the future. oof.oh he wants to say something hold on. ok this is the master.

CARN

ok im back. the master said you all wanted a name, so thats his. fair enough. oho~we might play more games soon, friends. well see. it all depends on timing.well ok, good night humanity. your midnight present will be ready for you when the sun peeks its lazy eye over the mountains. sleep tight, YOU.

- 🦉or i guess im yikes now, i dunno.

[grimoirevol2]

what did you do with them?

oh. we havent touched them. we arent planning on touching them tonight anyway. really whats the fun in bothering them to take over their fake online magic book.theyre distracted with one of us, though. but its only a distraction. im a poet, not a fighter. if the master wanted to do something to them at this stage would invalidate the fun of this game. it wouldnt be a joke. this though. this is hilarious. although very worryingly temporary. pace yourselves, theyre going to need to wait a while to get back on and pitter-patter about oh, what on earths going on, who was this person who broke in, oh, oh. im being underdramatic. oh of course itll be much worse. should this next ask be phrased properly, you all will know much of what i am. should it not, should the game fail, well the master will need to reevaluate his investment in this case. id advise against that. the master is not easily calmed when his investments don’t return. don’t squander it, but for the moment, he likes all of YOU.- 🦉

[grimoirevol2]

do you want to kill them?

no. im scoffing at you for asking this. do you hear me scoffing. it is a delightful scoffing, oh. you should hear it.im sorry for being so above you. no, why would we even try. this is only a temporary game for me. the master saw an opportunity this night and asked me to play. if we struck at them, well that wouldnt be very fun would it. yes yes this is much more fun for the moment.after all this show im putting on is all for YOU.- 🦉

[grimoirevol2]

lesson 3. new curriculum.

sometimes lessons need reteaching.

but this one won’t need long.

oh? youve already noticed, havent you. i am not a numbered fool like the eyes. no, my friends, i pride myself on two things. my uniqueness and my wit.

what would you like to hear?

the next action depends on you.

three questions are a poets answer

before my games are through.

i return this account at 8:08 AM eastern time,

whether or not my prophecy’s come true.

hopefully you will have taken full advantage of my mind,

because that parts all on YOU.

- 🦉

[grimoirevol2]

Do you like dogs?

Yes, of course. All pets are great. I once heard that other malakhim or other celestials from other denominations sometimes take the form of dogs to fulfill their duty, and since then I’ve cursed myself for not following their example. Imagine me, but as a dog. Glorious.

Sally won’t let us keep one in the attic because she’s allergic, but dogs are great. There’s a group of husky owners in town, and the mayor’s one of them: they all go out for coffee every Sunday morning or so. The police keep a few for super-special investigations (when Lt. Loon isn’t on duty). Rebecca has a magic one named Jump, and her daughter, Pearl, has made a project of trying to keep it in their house (although failing adorably).

As a fun aside, sometimes we use revelation on the dogs in the K9 unit since they have better senses of smell and better sight in the dark (when we’re inclined to keep things dark) than us in our human form. 

…Wait a second. Wait one damn moment.

 Why the Hell are YOU asking? - ⑦

[grimoirevol2]

26?

We will not be speaking about the numerically named “entity” that we have not disclosed. Trust us, it’s safer that way. If you try and guess from here-on, you will not be answered. The only way you’ll know about them is if they talk about themselves on their own terms. The chances of that are slim — very fucking slim as of present. 

As we said, discussing them is dangerous to us and them. If they’re confident in their abilities to fight what comes after them, they’ll have the chance to speak up. - ⑦

[grimoirevol2]

heard from oreb recently?

No, thankfully. It’s been about a week. We’re still watching him very closely, but we’ve also put more cases in the real-world higher up. He’s in our sights but not in our crosshairs.

I wouldn’t worry too much about him, since he seems busy with planning. If you can put us in contact with someone who knows more about him that isn’t him, we’d appreciate it for the advancement of our understanding on him.

Oh, and feel free to contact him. Don’t hassle him, and he won’t hurt you. That seems to be the pattern, although I guess he just fucked with me because he felt like it. - ⑥

[grimoirevol2]

Is there any other entities with numarical names, such as 3 or 8?

We’ve created a new title page that contains information on all celestials we know of. 

There is another “entity” with a numerical name, but we’d rather not discuss them if it can be avoided. It’s a bit dangerous to talk about them. - ⑥

[grimoirevol2]

do angels really have burning wings and a thousand eyes etc?

Those are seraphim. I am malakhim. We are at the two ends of the angelological spectrum, technically speaking. 

The seraphim, or seraphs as normally named, are the highest echelon in the Christian God’s ranks. They are faceless, their heads and legs covered in yellow eyes, their horrific and awesome visages covered by four of their six wings. Through them, and through the First Sphere in general, God is made eternal.

The seraph’s primary power is known as “sanctification” and is the strongest of all of angelkin. (Remember how I said my power was “purification”?)

Through “sanctification” a seraph acts essentially as a power generator for God by making things holy under His graces. Seraphs are the closest to Him of any of us, and as long as any of them are active, He will always live. They are responsible for maintaining His divine providences (His lines of guidance wherever necessary) and ensuring He remains powerful. This includes overseeing the atonement of sins during life through administration of His holy flame.

In addition, through “sanctification”, they act like Supreme Court Justices, interpreting what is holy, what is not, throughout time. This is how God the “entity’ remains dynamic, just as the Supreme Court aids the United States Constitution in being dynamic. 

In terms of religious significance, other than the obvious mentions in Isaiah 6:1 and Revelations 4:8, it is also thought by angels that the angel recorded in Revelations 14:6, who is believed to be the Mormon prophet known as Moroni, was a seraphim as well (although in scripture it could be said that Moroni specifically lowered his rank to appear before man). 

To note is the association of a strong voice in an angel, which is uncommon amongst First Sphere angelkin (the most common that appear in Revelations and most scripture, really).

However, we (in our time here on Earth) have never seen a seraph travel to the World of the Living, and, in Heaven, it is believed that they cannot. This is the basis of a belief that seraphs cannot walk the World of the Living for they are basically too holy to do so. Any actions that significantly blur the lines between planes would be noticed, and would especially not be overlooked by the minions of Purgatory. 

Oh, and to clarify: As a malakhim, and thanks to my ordained duty, I was allowed to cross over freely. - ⑦

[grimoirevol2]

why talk to each other if yall are devils and angels? i thought they were xenophobic against each other

Xenophobic? There’s a hundred thousand varieties of human, but in the end you’re all humans, right? Celestials are the same way.

Hm. Humanity is probably a bad example. Let me rephrase.

Although there were huge battles in the extremely distant past, if the Christian God disallowed sinners, there would be little reason to follow him. By allowing sin, C.G. can make himself a force of “good” by absolving it. In fact, if sin didn’t exist, his whole shtick would probably collapse in on itself.

The Christian Devil, the Big Red Himself, made devils in His name as servants, demons as agents, and sinners as congregators. The Christian God made the angels as servants, saints as agents, and prophets as congregators.

In both cases, the duty of celestials is decided by Absolutia. We’re two sides of the same coin, both made for the progression of our respective higher powers. If either side disallowed the forces of the universe from our generation, if a war between Heaven and Hell broke out, all worlds would fall to chaos, because it’s our duty to keep the worlds ticking as normal. 

Put another way, the “normal state” of the world is one in which both Heaven and Hell don’t bother each other, and neither side bothers the World of the Living beyond overseeing it and preventing it from destroying itself. 

Celestials that might be called traitor to one side or the other are actually more accurately just expats. If an angel in Heaven turns bad, it’s their responsibility to get citizenship in Hell. If a devil in Hell decides torturing the damned just isn’t their thing anymore, they can file to get to Heaven. Really, that’s about how different we are.

The Malleus Maleficarum has a poetic but accurate way of putting it. Atrocity exists not because there are no Gods, but because intervention in other planes always results in shit hitting the fan in one way or another. That’s why there’s always books about it.

Neither is it valid to object that He therefore wishes evil to be; since He can prevent it but will not; for, as has been shown in the arguments for the truth, God cannot wish evil to be. He neither wishes nor does not wish it, but He permits it for the perfecting of the universe. 

- ⑥