hueningsloverr

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ sk8ergirl !

pairing: huening kai x idol!reader  summary:  when huening kai was young, he had these on-and-off relationships. during one off the ‘offs’, he met you. years later, you're famous and he’s stuck unhappy in a relationship that was more out of convenience then love. count: 0.9k  extra: hey... so im like not dead..

“gyu please come with me to this concert” taehyun, pleaded with the brunette, who just shrugged.

“i’ve never heard of the artist- plus jjun and i are going to have a dance rehearsal soon. just invite soobin, i’m sure he will go with you.” he responded, eyes not leaving the tablet in front of him, studying the choreography.

“soobin’s busy this weekend! i don’t want to have to ask kai, not while he’s going through relationship turmoil.” the younger of the two whined.

“ask kai what?” huening asked, appearing in the common space out from his room, staring down at taehyun with the same expression as always.

“oh! kai- hi, uh, i just have tickets to a concert this weekend but no one to go with..”

“what artist? it may be one hiyyih likes if you’d like to go with her.”

“(y/n)! she’s actually from the same area you are maybe you kn-“

kai froze. ignoring everything else taeyhun said he quickly left to go to his room.

it didn’t take a fool to put the pieces together, and the question rang out in his head. were you a musician now? you followed your dreams after moving away.. you really did it. 

he wanted to know more, he needed to know more. but he couldn’t call in his sisters to learn more, if he asked hiyyih or lea then he ran the risk of the group knowing.

despite taehyun’s mockery, huening did know how to work a computer, and how to search up things online. he may have spent most of his time playing video games, but he knew how to do things on his own. as kai researched you now, he realised you had an album named after him. well, maybe not him exactly, but ‘HHKK.’ seemed a bit too close to the “huening ‘hyuka’ kamal kai” you used to date.

scrolling through the list of 20 songs, he noticed it was a breakup album, full of hate and feelings of betrayal. 

looking at the first song, kai was shocked. “‘circles ft. pierce the veil’?” he asked out loud. pierce was a big band in america, he knew that much. he had heard beomgyu talking of them to taehyun before. the lyrics felt more like a love song, yet kai could read into the tone, how you always reffered to you and him as ‘running’, trying to escape something. escape her.

the next track, ‘girlfriend ft. avril lavigne’. kai didn’t even have to look at the lyrics to know what it was about- it was a diss to her. once again, you were angry. you had every right to be angry, though kai couldn’t even begin to understand why you blamed her. kai was the one who left you, she never forced him. he was the bad guy, not her.

as he kept reading the tracks, he realized more and more how he had hurt you. songs featuring paramore, my chemical romance, the used, alanis morissette, and fall out boy. alanis morissette. you used to rave about her album ‘jagged little pill’ to him when you were laying in his bed, bodies as close as could be.

the main track, ‘sk8ergirl’, was what really did it for him. what story were you telling? you were happy with someone else? or was it from the point of view of 17 year old you? a boy and a girl, extremely obvious about how they were in love but never ended up together. the boy was a bitch, basically. and so the girl went on and fell in love with a rockstar. were you calling kai a bitch, and boosting your own ego like that? or was it a swapped gender roles, to make it less obvious? he couldn’t tell.

no matter what the song was written about, kai had hurt you. and you took it out in the only way you knew how; music. kai joined theatre to gain her attention, you wrote songs about him to let off some steam; maybe even gain his attention. but no matter how much steam you let off, he was still with her, and you were still alone, with that red and black fender squire stratocaster you had so proudly shown kai when you were seniors, the one you put together yourself. the red grain pick guard was your favourite feature of the whole guitar, kai remembering so clearly how you ranted on and on.

‘no no- most strats are one basic colour for this area here, the pick guard. this is a grain! it has a cool pattern!’ you had told him, smiling widely as you pointed out the features on your guitar. ‘i want to get a bass that’s the exact opposite! red grain body, black pick guard. wouldn’t that be so cool? you should learn bass, i mean you already know basically every instrument. then we could play together! i’m writing up this song right now, think i’m gonna call it “i’m with you”, the bass part is pretty simple!’

‘i’m with you’. fourth track. a love song. you had kept it in the album? you had published a song so clearly written about kai? he could still remember you softly humming the melody, still not fully having worked out the lyrics. it was about being alone - something like standing on a bridge, no one looking for you - when someone comes to your rescue and saves you from that darkness. 

“you still released it, even though you’re alone.” kai hummed to himself, continuing to search you up. 

single. never married. no kids. doesn’t party much. still goes out skating constantly. said in an interview you were ‘still caught in the whirlwind romance of high school’. caught in the ‘betrayal of it all’.

you really were the sk8ergirl, weren’t you?

authors note : so hey, im not dead. thats crazy right? i hate how this is writ0but i felt like posting so!!!! uhm, yeah. anywho..

©2025 — all rights reserved to hueningsloverr , please do not plagiarize or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ carbon copy !

pairing: non-idol! huening kai x reader summary: although you loved huening kai, he loved someone else. count: 1.2k extra: perhaps i'm setting this up to be tyun x reader... who knows

it’s hard to feel good about yourself when the boy of your dreams is staring at your carbon copy. 

a girl who looks just like you, with a few changes. her hair was a singular shade different, and she was barely three inches taller. she shared your smile, and went as far as having your style, yet she was the one with him. it was impossible to compete - it was just so unfair that she was everything you wished to be but never dared to attempt.

he was able to find someone who looks like you - another version. a doppelgänger. it was like you were living in a dream, so close yet it wasn’t you.

she’s perfect in every way, the kind of girl who could never be anything other than effortlessly beautiful. sun-hee, that’s her name, though you don’t even need to know it to know her - she’s always around. always with him. with kai.

and there she is, sitting next to him, her head resting on his shoulder, as if they were made to fit together. she’s everything you aren’t, and yet, she’s the one who gets to be with him. the one who gets to live the dream.

you stand at the edge of the bleachers, hands shoved into the pockets of your hoodie, watching them from a distance. kai, your secret crush for as long as you can remember, laughs at something sun-hee says, his eyes crinkling at the corners. your heart does this painful twist - half envy, half longing - because it’s not you making him laugh. it’s never you.

you’ve known for a while now that you’ll never be the one he notices. you’re not the kind of girl who can just be seen, the kind of girl who can stand out without trying. you don’t have sun-hee’s flawless beauty or the ability to speak in a room full of people without freezing. you’re just… you. and that’s not enough. not for him.

“hey, you okay?”

the voice startles you, and you look up to find taehyun standing beside you, his brown eyes soft with concern. he’s your best friend, the one who’s always been there. the one who doesn’t know about your crush on kai - at least, you don’t think he does.

“yeah,” you mumble, turning your attention back to the game. “i’m fine.”

he doesn’t buy it. “you don’t look fine,” taehyun says, sitting down next to you on the bleacher, his presence calm and easy.

you sigh, the weight of it all pressing in on you. you try to focus on the game, but your eyes betray you, slipping back to kai and sun-hee. they’re laughing again, his arm casually draped over her shoulders. the way he looks at her - it’s like she’s the only person in the world.

“i just don’t get it,” you admit, the words slipping out before you can stop them. “why her? why is she the one with him?”

taehyun follows your gaze, glancing briefly at the pair on the field before looking back at you. “what do you mean?”

you gesture vaguely at sun-hee. “she’s perfect. everything i’m not. she’s beautiful, and funny, and confident. i can’t even talk to him without stumbling over my words. it’s like she was made for him. she’s everything i wish i could be.”

taehyun looks at you for a long moment, like he’s trying to figure something out. then, slowly, he shakes his head. “you’ve got it all wrong.”

you frown, not understanding. “what do you mean?”

“she’s not perfect,” he says quietly. “no one is. you’re just... comparing yourself to a version of her that doesn’t even exist. you’re looking at her from the outside, seeing what she wants you to see. but you don’t know her. not really.”

your chest tightens as you absorb his words. “that’s easy for you to say. you’re not the one sitting here watching him laugh with her. you don’t know how it feels to be invisible.”

“i do know,” he insists. “i know exactly how it feels to be ignored, to feel like no one sees you. nut that’s not what’s going on here.”

you turn toward him, confusion written across your face. “what do you mean?”

“look, sun-hee might seem like the kind of girl who would catch his attention, but you don’t know what kai is looking for. you don’t know what he sees in her. you just think you know. and maybe - maybe you’re selling yourself short.”

you shake your head, feeling a bitterness rise in your throat. “that’s the problem, tyun. i’m not enough. i’m not beautiful enough, i’m not confident enough, and i sure as hell don’t fit into his world the way she does. you’ve seen how he looks at her. he doesn’t even know i exist.”

taehyun doesn’t say anything at first. instead, he sits there, quiet, letting your words hang between you like a heavy cloud. finally, he speaks, his voice soft but certain.

“maybe he doesn’t see you the way he sees her right now,” he says. “but that doesn’t mean he won’t. it doesn’t mean you’re invisible. and it definitely doesn’t mean you’re not enough. you’re enough just as you are. and if he can’t see that, then it’s not your problem. it’s his.”

his words land, but you can’t quite wrap your head around them. you’ve spent so long thinking that maybe if you could be like sun-hee - if you could just be a little more of what kai wanted - then maybe he’d notice you. but taehyun is right. maybe you’ve been looking at everything all wrong. maybe you are the one who needs to stop doubting yourself, who needs to see your worth, whether kai sees it or not.

the game continues, but you’re no longer paying attention. instead, you’re thinking about what taehyun said, the weight of it settling into your chest. maybe you don’t need to be someone else. maybe being yourself - being the person you’ve always been - is enough. maybe that’s the version of you kai needs to see.

later that night, you’re lying in bed, scrolling through your phone as the world around you fades. you see a new post from kai: a picture of him and sun-hee, smiling wide at some restaurant, their arms around each other like they’re part of the same world. his caption reads: “my best friend and the one who makes me feel like i can do anything. Love you, sunnie.”

your heart aches as you stare at the screen, your thumb hovering over the post. it’s not just the image, but the reality behind it - the certainty that they belong together in a way that you can’t touch. for a moment, you want to put the phone down, to bury the hurt. but then something else happens. you pause.

maybe it won’t happen today. maybe it won’t even happen this year. but one day, someone will look at you the way kai looks at sun-hee. one day, someone will see you for everything you are, just as you are. and that someone will love you because of it.

you take a deep breath, set your phone down on your desk, and close your eyes. 

tomorrow’s another day. and maybe, just maybe, you’re starting to believe that you’re worth more than just a carbon copy of someone else.

authors note : so literally no guy i've liked in the past two years has liked me back and they've all gone off and gotten girlfriends that look just like me

©2025 — all rights reserved to hueningsloverr , please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ 5 years !

pairing: huening kai x reader summary: huening kai had been your best friend for five years, and sometimes he was a little bit more than that word count: 1.2k extra: happy five years to my ult!! my boo!! hue i love u <3 apart of my anniversary series! (even though its nearly a year late...)

five years was a long time. it seemed like an eternity. yet in the blink of an eye, five years had passed. five tireless, long, years. five of the best years of your life. five years you would never trade for anything.

it was weird to think that you met huening kai in 2014. it made sense, but it felt off. a decade of friendship. not many people could boast that.

naturally, you were there for him when he auditioned for big hit, and you were there when he was accepted. you were there as often as you could be during his trainee days. and you were there, front row, for his debut.

his best friend.

and sometimes more than that.

'beomgyu made a joke about how everyone else has had their first kiss. all of the other boys, besides me.' he pouted, looking down sadly at his plushie. you knew it was a scheme. he just wanted to see what you would do. would you comfort him? or would you laugh? it was just a test. yet you couldn't help but hope that he wanted you to change that fact.

'well, beomgyu likes to joke around. you know that.' you sighed, leaning your head on his shoulder. wasteland baby by hozier was playing faintly in the background. the moment felt perfect.

beomgyu could no longer poke at kai anymore about not having his first kiss after that.

sometimes you were less than a best friend, too.

'kai you can't keep doing this! look at you! you're falling asleep during lunch. you're tired.' you shouted, lip quivering as he paced around his room. the choreographer had sent him back to his dorm. exhaustion. soobin called you the moment kai left. you were there waiting for him.

'i'm fine.' he grumbled, practically falling into his bed.

'you're not. you're not fine! soobin told me himself.'

pain flashed across his face at that. he had been betrayed by his leader. 'soobin doesn't know what he's talking about.'

you scoffed, eyeing him. 'if you're going to be difficult like this, i'm just going to leave.'

'good. i don't want you here if you're not going to believe me!'

you both ended up crying that day.

he had his off days, and so did you. but in the end, you always found your way back to him, and him to you.

the years had changed things between the two of you. you'd seen each other grow, both in talent and as people. there had been moments of pure joy—like when he’d call you late at night after a successful performance, his voice crackling with excitement as he recounted every detail of the show, his happiness contagious. but there had also been times when you both barely recognized each other through the stress and pressure of life in the public eye.

there were arguments, misunderstandings, and sometimes weeks of silence. but never long enough to forget each other. 

never long enough to let go.

the moment you realized things had shifted, though, was when he looked at you that night, his dark eyes soft in the dim light of his dorm room.

“you've been here for everything, haven't you?" his voice was quiet, almost distant. he had a habit of looking away when he spoke about his fears, but there was something about the way he said it this time, something raw and unspoken.

you nodded, not trusting yourself to speak. there was a lump in your throat. you knew exactly what he meant.

“i don’t think i could’ve done any of this without you," he added, his voice more serious now. it was rare for him to be so open, but in this moment, it felt like a door had opened. maybe it had always been there, but neither of you had walked through it.

you didn’t know if it was because of the weight of the years between you, or because of how much you’d both been through, but the confession lingered in the air, heavy and unspoken.

“i’ve always been here,” you whispered, your voice betraying you. you could feel your heart beating a little too fast.

a small, knowing smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “i know.”

there was nothing left to say in that moment. there was no need for words, really. you both had been waiting for the right moment, and maybe you both already knew that now was that time.

it was late when he leaned in, his forehead resting against yours, his breath mingling with yours in the cool air of his apartment.

“you’ve always been my best friend," he murmured softly, so quietly that you almost missed it. “and i think i’ve always wanted you to be something more."

the realization hit you like a wave crashing over the shore. the feelings you had tried to ignore, the small gestures that meant so much, the way he always seemed to find you in the room, even if you hadn’t said a word. all of it, suddenly, made sense. It wasn’t something either of you had planned—it had just been there, between you, all along.

you reached up, your hand grazing his cheek, and he looked at you, as if waiting for something. maybe it was permission, or maybe it was just the understanding that this was the moment. either way, you didn’t hesitate.

before either of you could overthink it, your lips met, and time seemed to stand still. no more words, no more confusion. just a kiss—a quiet confirmation that the years of friendship had always been leading to this.

the days that followed felt like a new chapter. your friendship remained at the core of it all, but now there was this quiet understanding, a deeper connection between you.

you both moved slowly, unsure of how to navigate this new space, but it didn’t matter. 

every laugh, every glance, every quiet moment shared was enough.

kai still had his busy schedule, his rehearsals, and performances. and you still had your life outside of his world, the world you had always lived in. but now, when the chaos of life got too much, you were there for each other in ways you hadn’t been before. 

you were his refuge, and he was yours.

one afternoon, five years after you had first met, you were sitting on the couch, wrapped up in blankets, binge-watching a show. his head was resting on your shoulder, your fingers lightly tracing his hand as the room filled with quiet laughter.

it wasn’t perfect, but it was real. and in that moment, you wouldn’t have traded it for anything.

“i’m glad you’re still here," he said, his voice thick with contentment. “i think i’ve been in love with you for a while now."

you smiled softly, your heart full. “me too, hyuka. me too.”

it was simple, but it was enough. because sometimes the best love stories are the ones that take their time. 

and you and kai had all the time in the world.

you didn’t know what the future held, but for the first time in a long while, it didn’t matter. you had each other. and that was more than enough. and so, five years of friendship had blossomed into something more.

a/n: i'm back...! i had surgery about two months ago and as i lounged in bed i realized i never finished this :((( so i'm sorry its like 9 months late to the rest of my series!!! ill be starting a valentines day series maybe?

©2025 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

hi pookies! it's been a while, i'm sorry :(

this school year has been a lot even though i went back three weeks ago, and before that i got some really hard news over the summer.

i've got some really bad constant pain throughout my body, which makes it really hard to do a lot of things i enjoy. it's also really draining, so when i do have free time, i'm way too tired to even write.

over the summer, i had a consult about a surgery that would alleviate this pain - and i got the news that if i went through with this surgery, it could be really hard to do certain things pertaining to having children, which was tough to hear. i've spent most of the summer, at the ripe age of 17, deciding if it was worth it or not.

i had to decide if i'd rather wait another decade or two, until after i've had children (if i even do) to have this surgery, or to have it in the next few months. of course, it isn't a hundred percent guarantee that issues will arise, but they might.

i decided i want the surgery.

i wrote a lot about that, and maybe if i'm able to think about it without crying, i'll post it.

until then, i don't have anything to post writing-related, i'm sorry

hopefully soon i'll be back into writing

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ 60 months !

pairing: taehyun x reader summary: a close-knit relationship with taehyun is something to be earned, and you seemed to have done just that. word count: 1.1k extra: have we all gotten over txt world tour? I HAVENT !! go terry fuck it up!! apart of my anniversary series that i accidentally never finished!

taehyun was unlike anyone you had ever met before - and that was saying something considering you knew many people. he was more reserved than others, yet at the same time he was so outgoing.

his duality was what drew you to him initially - how could one person have so many different personalities? then you found out he was an idol, and it made a decent amount of sense. it was apart of his job to act one way on camera and another for the different concepts. when he was off camera he was able to be himself.

what drew taehyun to you was the fact that you studied his behavior; every time he did something that seemed out of line for how he acted that day, you payed great attention to it. it was almost as if you took mental notes on how he acted so you could draw out a map of behavior.

but you’d never fully be able to uncover every last detail about the boy, and he’d never fully know everything about you either.

it was a fact that both of you had come to terms with early on in your friendship, and though at times you seemed displeased by it, you largely accepted the fact.

still, there were moments when you felt an unspoken understanding between the two of you, like you could read each other's thoughts without needing words. taehyun had a way of looking at you, his eyes soft yet probing, as if he were trying to see the depths of your soul. in those moments, the walls he built around himself seemed to crumble, even if just for a second.

as your friendship grew, so did your curiosity. you found yourself wanting to know more about the person behind the stage persona, the real taehyun who laughed at silly jokes and pondered over the mysteries of life.

and he, in turn, seemed equally intrigued by you. your quiet confidence, the way you seemed to observe the world with a discerning eye, fascinated him.

there were late-night conversations that spanned hours, where you shared your dreams, fears, and everything in between. it was during these times that you felt the closest to him, and you cherished these moments more than anything. yet, despite the bond you shared, there was always a part of him that remained elusive, just out of reach.

one evening, after a particularly grueling day of rehearsals, taehyun invited you to the rooftop of the building. the city lights sparkled below, and the night air was cool against your skin. he leaned against the railing, gazing out into the distance.

"you know," he began, his voice barely above a whisper, "sometimes i wonder if anyone truly knows me. not the idol, but the real me."

you turned to him, searching his face for any hint of emotion. "i think people see different parts of you," you said gently. "and maybe that's enough. maybe we're not meant to be fully understood by anyone."

he nodded, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "maybe you're right. but hey, i'm glad i at least have you. you seem to see me in ways others don't."

your heart swelled at his words. it wasn't a grand declaration, but it was enough.

in that moment, you knew that the connection you shared with him was special, even if there were parts of him that remained a mystery.

as the night wore on, you stood there together, comfortable in the silence, knowing that some things were better left unsaid. and that was okay. because sometimes, the beauty of a relationship lies in its complexities, and the unspoken understanding that comes with it.

days turned into weeks, and weeks into months. your bond with taehyun only deepened. you became his confidant, the person he turned to when the pressures of fame became too much. you listened without judgment, offering him a safe space to express his worries and fears.

one evening, after a long day of interviews and photoshoots, taehyun showed up at your door, looking more exhausted than you had ever seen him. without a word, you let him in and led him to the couch. he collapsed onto it, letting out a deep sigh.

"rough day?" you asked softly, sitting down beside him.

he nodded, closing his eyes. "you have no idea. sometimes it feels like i'm being pulled in a thousand different directions, and i can't keep up."

you placed a hand on his shoulder, offering him a comforting squeeze. "you're doing amazing, tyun. it's okay to feel overwhelmed. just remember to take care of yourself too."

he opened his eyes and looked at you, a hint of gratitude in his gaze. "thank you. i seriously don't know what I'd do without you."

you smiled, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. "i'm always here for you."

in that moment, you realized just how much taehyun meant to you. he wasn't just a friend; he was someone you cared about deeply, someone you wanted to see happy and thriving. and you knew he felt the same about you.

as time went on, your relationship with him continued to evolve. you attended his concerts, cheering him on from the crowd. you celebrated his successes and comforted him during his lows. and through it all, your bond only grew stronger.

one rainy afternoon, taehyun invited you to his favorite café, a cozy little place tucked away from the bustling city streets. the sound of raindrops tapping against the window created a soothing backdrop as you sipped your coffee.

"i've been thinking a lot lately," taehyun said, breaking the comfortable silence. "about life, about us."

you looked up from your cup, curiosity piqued. "what about us?"

he took a deep breath, his expression serious. "i know we've always said that we can't fully know everything about each other, and i've come to terms with that. but i also think… maybe that's what makes our relationship so special. we keep discovering new things about each other, and it keeps things interesting."

you nodded, understanding where he was coming from. "i know what you mean - it's like we're on this journey, together, and there's always something new."

a small smile played on his lips. "exactly. and i wouldn't want it any other way. "i've been at this for sixty months, you know?" he added, pausing slightly while he tried to formulate the proper words. "and until you i've never met someone who wasn't one of the boys that could even somewhat understand me."

in that moment, you felt a profound sense of contentment. you realized it didn't matter if you knew every last thing about taehyun, simply knowing him in the slightest was enough.

"well, here's to me making sixty months of progress in just a few months." you grinned, raising your coffee cup in a joking manner.

"here's to you - to us."

a/n: finally returning to this series after like 4 months whoopsies

©2024 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

soft hyuka braces first kiss first everything thought.. both of you are normal average people non-idol au.

hueningkai was already your friend before becoming your boyfriend, though, that didn't mean he wasn't shy when initiating physical contact at first, timidly asking you 'can i hold your hand?' and 'can i kiss you on your cheek?' with that cute awkward smile and soft voice of his

it wasn't a surprise, considering it was the first time his feelings got reciprocated.

(⁠っ⁠˘⁠з⁠(⁠˘⁠⌣⁠˘⁠ ⁠)

watching tv shows was something you found boring to do, nothing picked your interest and it just wasn't what you liked to do

with hueningkai, they suddenly felt entertaining to watch, loud laugh and high-pitched voice telling you how good the joke was, oh you absolutely adored him.

a loud laugh erupted from hueningkai as he heard the joke 'what do you call a fight between two celebrities? starwars!', "seriously, how do you find this funny?" you said, jokingly looking at him with a mean face but then giggling along with him.

"what do you mean how?! you just don't get it." hueningkai pouts but he inmediately drops the act "yn".

"yes?" you look at him, waiting for an answer but, "i— uh i.." he takes a deep breath.

"i— i wanted to ask if its okay.. if.. can we kiss?" kai scratches his neck, he can feel the way his ears heat up at the way you're completely silent. "like.. here, on my lips".

"yeah?" "yeah."

you nod timidly, feeling your cheeks heating up, why is the room so suddenly hot?

he scoots closer to you, hesistantly taking your hands in his so he could put them on both sides of his face.

staring at eachother's eyes, noses brushing.. kai couldn't help but cringe, letting out a squeaky laugh while hiding himself on your shoulder

"c'mon kai!" you whine, messing with his hair "im sorry! i'll get serious. really!"

once again you both are in your positions, kai closes his eyes and closes the gap himself, earning a surprised squeak from you

the kiss didn't last long as kai got shy.

he breaks the kiss and hugs you tightly, hidding his burning face on your neck

"i love you."

[hueningsloverr]

Hi hi rhia!! How’re you?

hi hi!! i’ve been good :3 (busy but good) hbu my lovely mootie?

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ love !

pairing: huening kai x reader summary: you spent a while thinking love isn't real until someone makes you reconsider word count: 0.5k tw: allusions to sa (never fully mentioned simply hinted at) extra: i'm back (how longs it been?)

love wasn't real - at least not according to you in january of your freshman year of high school. you had just broken up with your boyfriend, your first boyfriend. it wasn't working out, and the stress of school and trying to maintain a healthy relationship was getting to you.

he didn't take it well.

he was able to prove love wasn't a real thing because overnight the love he harbored for you turned to hate, and suddenly all your friends had you marked as public enemy number one.

love wasn't any realer two months later when the only boy - only person - you had been able to trust locked you in a closet. whoever came up with the name 'seven minutes in heaven' clearly had the wrong idea about which part of the afterlife that game originated from.

but then huening kai came along. he was different, something you noticed from the start. at first it was subtle, the way he smiled, listened, and understood everything. then it was how treated people with genuine kindness, and the way he was able to make everyone feel seen.

it took time for you to let your guard down. in your eyes, why would kai be any different? but he was patient, far too patient for a teenage boy. he didn't push or pry, he simple existed. when you struggled with your homework, he was there to help. when you felt overwhelmed by the whispers and the gossip, he was there to distract you with stories and jokes. when you felt like you couldn’t trust anyone, he was there, proving trust wasn’t something that needed to be earned, but something that could be given freely.

the first time you realized you might actually care for him was on a rainy afternoon in april. you were soaked and miserable, and he showed up with an umbrella and your favorite hot drink, having somehow known exactly where you’d be.

as he walked you home, you felt something shift inside you. it wasn’t sudden, like a bolt of lightning. it was slow, like the blooming of a flower after the frost fades.

with kai, love didn’t feel like the cliche battlefield. it felt like coming home.

it was in the quiet moments, the shared laughter, the understanding looks. it was in the way he respected your boundaries, never pushing for more than you were willing to give. it was in the way he supported your dreams, encouraged your passions, celebrated your victories, and comforted you in your defeats.

love with kai wasn’t about grand gestures or dramatic declarations. it was about consistency, about showing up day after day, about choosing each other even when it wasn’t easy.

trust, respect, and genuine affection.

it was about friendship that blossomed into something more, something deeper.

and for the first time, you realized maybe love was real.

maybe it was just a matter of finding the right person to share it with. and maybe, just maybe, that person was kai.

a/n: completely based off of my high school experience and the love i wish to one day find

©2024 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

hi pookies !! it's been so long, and while i'm definitely not back yet, i've finished with school for the year and i'm writing again ! i start work in two weeks, but i do plan on coming back !! a lot's gone down in the past few months and i can't wait to tell you all about it :3

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ 261 weeks !

pairing: beomgyu x reader summary: love was scary, but loving beomgyu wasn't word count: 1.0k extra: happy five years to the king of mullets!! the birthday boy! apart of my anniversary series!

all it took was one glance to fall in love with beomgyu. your friends always joked about love at first sight, and it was hard to call yourself a believer of such nonsense. but then you met beomgyu. and it all made sense.

the two of you were like magnets, north and south, drawn together by some invisible force.

it was strange - you were never really sure what love was. sure, your parents were in love - but at times it felt like they weren’t. you didn't know what love looked like, or how it sounded. what it felt like. you'd never in your life felt the butterflies fluttering around your stomach, or the serenity love supposedly brings. then you met him. it was not butterflies, or serenity - it was complete chaos. your stomach was not filled with butterflies, but rather shards of glass and knots. it was odd. love wasn't supposed to feel like that, or so you thought. your stomach twisted in ways you didn't know were possible, and you felt light headed every time you even looked at him.

it was nothing like past crushes, or even relationships. in the past, you decided to always mentally breakup with a person before actually breaking up. it took you a minimum of two months, and then in your mind you were no longer together. you could kiss, and hold hands but it never feels like anything.

you figured thats why you were destined to be alone.

it doesn’t matter how long you could date someone, or how much you might like them - in your mind you have to break up.

and eventually you do.

thats what was so scary about liking beomgyu - the 'what if'. what if you stopped liking him, all of the sudden. what if you woke up one day with completely different feelings.

but, as days turned into weeks, your whirlwind of emotions surrounding beomgyu only seemed to intensify. despite any beginning fears, you somehow found themself seemingly drawn deeper into his orbit, unable to resist the magnetic pull of his presence. and before you knew it, he was asking you out on a date, and you were agreeing.

"i've got a date!" you hummed excitedly to your friend over the phone, watching as she smiled softly. it was hard not to smile when you spoke about beomgyu; it seemed to be unrequited love for the longest time, and now you had a chance.

"finally got asked out?" she teased, and you had half a mind to hang up on her then and there. but you laughed, nodding.

"popped the question last night when we were hanging out! we're going out to some restaurant he says is the best around on friday." you grinned, looking over at the calendar on your desk. "it's gonna be official soon. gonna go on the calendar." you added, staring at the empty date. you had his birthday circled, and his debut date, but that friday was left completely clean. if all went well, every year it would be marked with an anniversary. if.

you sprung up from your place on your bed, your phone thrown haphazardly somewhere near the end, and grabbed the closest marker you could. pink. in some literary way that would be considered ironic. you quickly marked down 'date w/ beomgyu @ 5:30' before moving back towards your bed.

now it was official. all that was left was for the date to go well.

which, naturally, it did. and time seemed to soar by after that. you made it through the 'three month rule', and the 'honeymoon phase'. survived any 'icks' - all the stupid modern slang for falling out of love. something about beomgyu made it impossible to fall out of love. it was as if he cast a spell on you, though you couldn't complain.

everything about beomgyu was loveable - even on days when his energy was lower than usual. you adored that fact about him; sometimes he had days where he just wasn't fully at a hundred, and that made him human. it was nice to know he still knew how to be human, even with his busy schedule.

he still found ways to make time for you, whether that was with face time calls or occasionally skipping practice. you adored him for all his attempts to be present in both your life and your relationship. he truly was arguably the closest someone could get to being the perfect boyfriend.

the closer you got to your five year anniversary, the more time he spent at your apartment. the other four boys were constantly hanging around the dormitory, and it was hard to find peace living with four other grown men. so, he resorted to spending a large sum of his free time with you - wandering around your part of town, visiting your favourite places, eating at your favourite restaurants. there was something so intimate, so domestic about it all. beomgyu was able to see an entirely different side to you, and vice versa. sides that had never fully been shown because there had been no reason to. living with someone is far different from simply knowing them.

beomgyu was able to see how much time meant to you, especially time well spent. he smiled seeing your large chalk calendar in the kitchen, where each month you erased and re-wrote to include the current things going on in your class. from nights out with friends to days spent entirely for yourself, it was all there. but there was a smaller calendar, hidden away in your room, long since forgotten.

it was old, with dust building up on its edges. it was a calendar from 2019 filled with different scenery around the world, though you only made it three months through the year.

"hey, babe?" he called out, staring blankly at the calendar hung up above your desk. it was years old, still stuck in march of 2019. scribbled messily on it were the words 'beomgyu' and 'date' - the rest was indecipherable. but he wasn't a fool, he recognised that very day. it was the day of your first date, the same day he asked you to be his girlfriend. you really never changed your calendar after that?

"i think your calendar is off by like-" he paused momentarily to do the math, "261 weeks."

a/n: grrr gyu birthday!!!!!! i luv u gyu :3 this took me way too long tbh

©2024 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ 1,862 days !

pairing: yeonjun x reader summary: being able to love yeonjun, and the road that lead you to him word count: 1.3k extra: happy five years to our oldest member!! 4th gen it boy yeonjun!! apart of my anniversary series!

yeonjun was like a breath of fresh air, a saving grace. moving to korea at eighteen was rough, but running into the boy on the streets suddenly made it all worth it. you had bumped into him early in the spring - you were still bundled up in a jacket wandering aimlessly around seoul. instead of finding your friend at the coffee shop she had promised to wait for you in, you quite literally ran into yeonjun.

'excuse me, can you help me?' you pleaded through broken korean, and he laughed slightly, understanding the gist of what you were asking him.

needless to say, he gave you directions, even walked you to the shop and sat down with you after you realised your friend had set out on her own to find you. he even went a step above the rest and walked you back to your apartment after learning just how new to the area you were.

the rest was (basically) history. all it took was one day for him to ask you out, and those dates quickly turned into weekends tucked away from the rest of the world hiding out in your apartment. your roommate was rarely home - she worked odd hours and had her own girlfriend to visit.

before you knew it, five months by yeonjun's side became five years.

"all i'm saying," you began, your boyfriend humming mindlessly on the couch as he half watched tv, half played on his phone. "is we should go out for our anniversary."

yeonjun nodded absentmindedly, your words not truly sinking in. "yeah, yeah." he mumbled, eyes glued to his phone. kai had got him hooked on some two player game, and now the duo were both constantly on their phones, fighting monsters or something.

"it's too bad taehyun asked me out too." you giggled, leaning over the couch to watch his reaction.

nothing.

"i mean, is it bad i said yes? we don't technically have plans, so it's not a big deal."

he didn't even acknowledge your presence.

"but i felt bad, because i had to turn down wooyoung, and dino, and changbin - yeonjun could you at least blink to let me know you're not some zombie?" you groaned, moving around the sofa to sit next to him.

now it was his turn to laugh and he wrapped his arm around you, his phone discarded next to him. "i was listening," he teased, eyes glistening with mischief as he smiled, clearly proud of himself. "i just wanted to see how ridiculous you'd get."

you chose to ignore his statement, moving past the ordeal. it was sort of childish. "so, dinner? tomorrow night?" you posed, moving to sit on your knees. it was almost as if you were ready to beg. anniversaries meant a lot to you - especially as this one marked five years since moving to korea.

it was hard, leaving your life behind. but, you had to. and things had worked out. really well.

"i've got practice. why don't we go out tonight? today marks five years of us meeting." he offered, frowning when he noticed just how disappointed you were.

"yeah, sure." you smiled, pushing yourself up off the couch. "i was hoping you'd be able to get off work tomorrow, but i get it. i promise i do."

he nodded, sighing. "have you talked to your parents recently?" the question caught you off guard - no matter how good or bad of a relationship you had with your parents, calling them rarely crossed your mind. when was the last time you spoke to either of them?

"no," you huffed, though more out of annoyance with yourself than with him. if you were to call them, they would chew you out for ghosting them. but life was busy, and the time difference did not help. "they weren't the biggest fans of me moving out here, you know."

his eyebrows furrowed as his head tilted slightly to the side, "they weren't? but - when i met them a bit back, they seemed so happy for you."

you tried to suppress the growing grin on your face at the idea. "my parents were so far from happy for me, jjunie. they just didn't want to upset either of us."

he nodded slowly, letting the information seep in. "well, that's too bad. i hoped to talk to them. but i guess i could see how they probably weren't the biggest fans of their eighteen year old deciding to just move out and into a foreign city."

"why would you want to talk to my parents?" you snorted, the idea so completely absurd it didn't even seem real. "didn't you say something along the lines of, 'i'm sorry you're related.' when you met them?"

he shrugged, clearly unable to form the proper sentence. you took his silence as a cue to leave and get ready for dinner. by the time you were done he'd probably have made a reservation somewhere, or called some sort of favour in. perks of being famous.

and of course, by the time you emerged from your bedroom, grabbing a hold of your wallet from your dresser, yeonjun himself was already waiting for you by the door, holding your shoes in his hands.

"took you long enough." he smiled, though you could see the faint spread of pink across his cheeks. he was never good at hiding the fact that he was blushing. over the years he had learn't you were simply too good at spotting it, and accepted the fact that you thought it was cute.

"so where are we going out tonight, mr. choi?" you grinned, slipping your shoes on and interlocking your arm with his as you made your way out the front door. sometimes having a first floor apartment was a blessing.

"it's a surprise." was all he said, and you understood that his words truly meant surprise. as in, he was not going to be telling you. but still, you quickly recognised the change of scenery. something about it was familiar.

you were close to your first apartment - the one you lived in when you met yeonjun. you could see the park you spent many afternoons together in. and up in the distance you could faintly see the coffee shop you went to when you first met yeonjun.

and it all made sense.

"coffee for dinner? don't you have practice tomorrow?" you questioned, nudging his shoulder with your own.

he nodded, taking a moment to look at you.

it felt like his breath had been knocked straight out of him.

you were everything to him.

"you know what?" he smiled, pausing.

"hm?" you hummed, stopping just a few feet in front of him. "what is it?"

"i've been in love with you for five years." you felt your heart stop in your chest. "i've spent these last five years doing what i love, while getting to be with the person i love. you don't know how crazily lucky i feel just waking up next to you."

he began to lower himself to the ground.

now it was your turn to have the breath knocked out of you. "jjunie?"

"it would be a lie to say these past five years have been easy, but hey, i love you. so they've all been worth it." he was pulling something out of his pocket.

a ring.

he didn't even need to ask the question for you to begin to tear up (i would.), your answer already so clear to him. "you don't need to even say yes, just let me know i'll be able to love you for et-"

"yes." you smiled, rushing quickly to pull him into a hug. "i've been in love with you since i met you, jjunie. and i plan on loving you for the rest of my life. the past 1,862 days have meant the world to me."

"not like anyones counting or anything." he teased, placing a soft kiss on your forehead.

yeah, moving to korea at eighteen was worth it.

a/n: i've never??? written??? a marriage??? proposal???? ive never???? witnessed???? true love????

©2024 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ 48,300 hours !

pairing: soobin x reader summary: being soobins best friend usually came with a lot of benefits, until a certain point. it also apparently came with a lot of communication issues word count: 1.2k warnings: drunk soobin 💀 (friendly reminder the drinking age in korea is 19! this is not underage drinking!) extra: happy five years to our fearless leader!! moa's love you soob!! apart of my anniversary series!

you met soobin when you were both 18. he was scouted by big hit - by you coincidentally. you were the one who realised the number he put on his form was wrong; it was you who tracked him down.

you were utterly mesmerised by the boy. it was hard not to be. he was everything you were told to look for in an up-and-coming idol.

everything about him screamed 'idol', from his dancing to his smile. and he had the voice on an angel (or so you giggled to your friends late at night over the phone). he was the perfect fit for the new boy ground big hit was interested in putting together.

the only issue was he refused to work unless you worked with him. and so, you got promoted, and gained a new best friend.

years later, and soobin still bragged to everyone he met about you. about how if it wasn't for you, he wouldn't even be an idol.

'i'm serious! she's the one who tracked me down! she's my guardian angel!' he giggled drunkly one night to his friends over the table. their recent comeback - eternity - had gone better than anticipated, and so the leader called for a celebration. kai was passed out on the couch (from exhaustion. not drinking. we don't support underage drinking here!!!)

'soobin! seriously you need to stop telling everyone this. all i did was reach out to you.' you groaned, hiding your face in your hands so the other boys wouldn't see the embarrassment creeping up on you. 'you tell this story every time you get even slightly tipsy!'

yeonjun snickered, leaning over and whispering something in beomgyu's ear. the two boys laughed in their seats, the younger of the duo clutching his stomach as he leant against taehyun.

you never learnt what yeonjun said to beomgyu that night, but it never truly seemed important. at least until soobin started staying out later, and claiming that he was just too busy to hang out anymore.

you suspected he was meeting someone - he wasn't bad looking, and he was nice. it wouldn't shock you that he was seeing someone. but it still hurt. that was the shocking part. the hurt.

you had no reason to be hurt, not really. soobin had every right to date whoever he pleased. no matter how much you detested him it. you also detested whoever out there got to see him in ways you never would - the in love side.

it's not like you were in love with your best friend. you just cared. a lot. that's all there was to your relationship - at least up until he showed up drunk outside your apartment door, barely able to support himself.

'soobin?' you whisper-shouted, eyes wide as you stared him down. what the hell was he thinking?

'yeonjun wouldn't pick up his phone when i called him.' he pouted, a downcast look spread across his face.

you sighed, opening your door slightly, motioning for him to come in. he half stumbled half fell through your entry way, and in some alternate universe your heart would've swelled at the fact that out of everyone, he chose to come to you. yet all you felt was pity.

'get into a nasty break up?' you mused, hooking your arm under his shoulder to help support him. it was no help that he was a towering six foot one.

he laughed at your words, shaking his head as you lead him towards your couch. 'i'm not dating anyone, silly.' he poked, and you could feel his body shake from laughing too hard. you simply nodded at his words, setting him down gently.

'so why're you here? just felt like stopping by?'

'i'm in love with you.'

you paused, your back towards him.

it was just a cruel joke.

he was drunk.

'you're wasted, soobin.' you huffed, grabbing him some spare blankets and a pillow. the other four boys were probably all passed out, and even if they were awake, asking them to make the forty-five minute drive at nearly two in the morning was just cruel.

he never responded. by the time you gathered your thoughts enough to face him and turned back around, he was passed out. you tucked him in, much like a mother would to a young child, and left him in your living room. come morning, he was gone. all that he left was a stack of neatly folded blankets and an excruciatingly long hand-written letter detailing the embarrassment he felt.

you never brought up that night to him. never spoke of his words. you had half the mind to just blame the alcohol. but a part of you hoped there was some piece of him that truly meant his words. but you would never say anything that could possibly jeopardise your job and your relationship with your best friend. so, your buried your feelings and continued on working side by side the tall boy.

at least, not until you were reaching the five year mark of soobin calling you his guardian angel.

"so, wanna go out?" he grinned, leaning over the kitchen counter. you had invited all the boys over, along with a few other friends, to celebrate their upcoming comeback and their five year debut anniversary. "for dinner maybe? we've known each other so long, we have so much to celebrate!"

you stuttered in your movements, his wording catching you off guard. "go out?" you confirmed, eyebrows furrowing as you continued to grab glasses from the cabinet. "your wording is always odd, choi." you teased, turning around to face him.

his face was flushed pink, though he quickly turned away. "you just like making fun of me." he whined, rolling his eyes slightly. "but it's whatever. it's why i love you."

he said those words so casually you felt like you were seconds away from organ failure. it was whiplash. a weird dream. maybe the end of the world?

"what?" you sputtered, eyes wide.

your panic clearly set something off inside of him, for soon his expression matched yours. "what do you mean 'what?'" he gasped, and suddenly it felt as if the two of you spoke entirely different languages. "why are you acting like this is news?"

you shook your head, willing yourself to wake up from the fever dream you were experiencing. "because it is?"

he laughed slightly, though it was not as if something was funny. it was a painful, confused laugh. "i told you i loved you years ago!"

your face fell in that instant. he had meant it?

"you told me you loved me back! i thought-" he paused, mortified. "i thought that meant we were… you know? oh my god! i just assumed you were too embarrassed to talk about it - i never thought that you weren't aware."

now it was your turn to laugh. it was cliché. miscommunication at the finest. "i've loved you for five years soobin." you smiled, moving across the counter to place a hand on his cheek. he was smiling like a mad man.

"you don't even understand how badly i've wanted you to tell me that." he spoke as if a weight had been lifted off his chest, as if he could finally breathe properly again. "i've been in love with you for an exhausting 48,300 hours. you know how tiring it is to love someone for every second of the day?"

a/n: decided to take a crack at the classic 'you didn't know i've been in love with you? we've been dating in my head for like, forever' trope!!

©2024 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ txt anniversary series !

soobin - 43,800 hours

yeonjun - 1,826 days

beomgyu - 261 weeks

taehyun - 60 months

huening kai - 5 years

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ persephone !

pairing: soobin x fem!reader summary: pomegranates and persephone. that's what soobin had come to learn. word count: 0.5k

most of your past lovers chose to call you tasteful names, crude insults surrounding the general theme of you being a monster. but you were no monster. you were just a woman.

in a way you were like a pomegranate- it was obvious when someone didn’t love you properly. all your past lovers left with red stained hands and disappointment etched across their face.

that’s why soobin was so special - he was able to get you to open up without forcing you so aggressively that you snapped. he didn't force you to suddenly bare yourself to him, he was slow, moving at your pace instead of his.

soobin was nothing like your past lovers. he was the exact opposite. he took the time to memorise you; to him nothing was 'too insignificant'. he remembered your favourite artists, colours, songs, and even time of day. everything mattered to him. and that is what made him matter so much to you. he knew of your affinity for greek mythology, and though most found it unsettling, he found it intruging.

'persephone and hades?' he queried, his head cocked to the side as his eyebrows furrowed. where had he heard those names before? he tried his best to pay attention in classes.

'they were believed by the greeks to be the king and queen of the underworld! there's a lot of retellings of their story, but in most of them...'

he watched in awe as you rambled on and on, eyes filled with nothing more than adoration. so what if you were a geek? a nerd? you were cute.

'but a common theme is that persephone ate the seeds of a pomegranate, meaning she was forced to stay in the underworld forever. but hades worked a deal out with her mom, demeter. that's why we have seasons!' you grinned like a small child showing a finger-painting to their parent. and soobin felt a sense of pride grow within him.

'we have seasons because... hades and persephone are in love?' he laughed slightly, his head not fully wrapped around the idea.

'we have seasons because both hades and demeter wished to be by persephones side, but neither could leave their realm. so...'

he felt bad for constantly finding himself in a daze, but there was such an intoxicating way in which you spoke about mythology that made him feel like a teenage boy again.

it was that very same day soobin realised for himself how similar to a pomegranate you were. he thought it was silly, comparing his girlfriend to a fruit, but in his head it made sense.

you symbolised life to him, you were like regeneration - allowing him to become a new version of himself he was not even aware was possible. all the symbols of a pomegranate could be applied to you - the myths and the stories revolving around the reddish fruit. it was odd, yet also endearing.

hades and persephone - a story of love that probably never should have been, a story of love that seemed impossible.

to soobin, the rulers of the underworld were not so different from the two of you.

except, whilst he was just hades, you were both persephone and the pomegranate. and instead of persephone being stuck with hades, it was soobin who found himself stuck to you. all because of how desirable you were.

a/n: i know! i know! usually i don't really include specific genders in my writings... but i love pomegranates and what they stand for as a literary device and i wrote this while on vacation as i watched my dad tear into a pomegranate whilst my mom looked like she was holding a small child

©2024 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

if you have a taglist, could i be added? your beomgyu fic held so much emotion in such few words, and was such a nice read in general! i hope no pressure comes from this ask, and if so, please don't take it too harshly! (-///-) 🤍

hi !! unfortunately at this moment i dont have a tag list sorry (╥﹏╥) this accounts super all over the place currently oopsies if i do create one ill add you !!

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ infatuation !

pairing: beomgyu x non-idol!reader summary: love sucks. communication issues suck even more. word count: 0.3k extra: lil tw for talk of poor mental health!!

love was hard. key emphasis on was. beomgyu made love easy. easy until your brain got in the way.

limerence they called it. a stage of infatuation plagued by intrusive thoughts and actions. you never really loved him, your brain just wanted you to. and that fact was scary.

was anything you ever felt real, or was it all just a chemical imbalance in your brain? those thoughts were why you couldn’t stay - though you could never tell him that.

"i'm not in love with you anymore." you watched as his eyes grew wide and his face turned red.

"bullshit!" he snapped, though his voice teetered on the edge of tears. he swallowed hard, as if trying to ingest his emotions.

"why won't you just let me say this beomgyu!" you cried. now it was your turn to choke back tears. "let me break up with you. please."

he shook his head, dismissing your words as if they were meaningless.

"because this isn't you! if kai thought this would be a funny joke, it's not! and if it's fans that are pressuring you, fuck them!"

his voice was raised, and he had a similar expression to a startled cat. yet, he wasn't angry. he was hurt.

"it’s my head, gyu. something is wrong with me! i can't love you with that something going on."

"so you're just going to give up?" he spat, his eyes narrowing as his eyebrows furrowed. "you're going to run and hide from me instead of asking for help."

"don't." you pleaded, and that was all it took for him to walk away.

because while love was easy with beomgyu, emotions weren't. heat of the moment arguments lasted days, and all it took to break his heart was one wrong word. so while beomgyu made love easy, he made everything else harder.

©2024 - all rights reserved to hueningsloverr, please do not plagiarise or translate any of my work

[hueningsloverr]

౨ৎ only !

pairing: huening kai x reader summary: huening kai was a pure lover. and nothing can defeat true, pure, love. word count: 0.9k extra: inspired by leehi's 'onlyl'! apart of my valentines day series

huening kai was rarely one to fall in love, but when he fell, he fell hard. there was no stopping him once he had his heart set on someone. and that is what was so unfortunate about being in love with kai. he truly loved will all of him.

it made it that much easier to hurt him, even if it was unintended.

he took everything to his heart, which at times made situations a hundred times worse.

to love huening kai could only be described as to be able to love in the purest form. to love and to be loved as adam loved eve. to love someone so greatly it felt as if they were apart of you. made specifically to suit you. to love someone in such a way that they truly were the only thing in life that mattered in the end.

the only thing that made you believe in true, everlasting, love.

when kai first asked you out, he made you promise something. a pinky promise. at the time, it made you smile. it seemed so childish, so innocent. yet looking back, it was so full of love.

a secret only you two shared, sealed with a kiss to the knuckles.

"promise we'll always be together?" he had mumbled, staring up into the night sky.

not even monet would be able to do the colours justice. the moon smiling down at the earth, awaiting its attention.

"i promise." you mumbled back.

foolish teenagers.

promises were meant to be broken, yet kai could never bring himself to go against his word. and neither could you.

being with kai was refreshing - nothing had to be hidden, or compartmentalized. your feelings were out in the open, and kai finally felt comfortable enough to voice his thoughts whenever he felt like it.

the first time he uttered "i love you," was the day you'd consider to be the worst of your life. you were just so tired, and all you wanted to do as crawl into yourself and completely disappear. your day was just so busy, and all kai did was move aside in bed and pull you into him.

"i love you too, hyuka."

there was some invisible string that always drew you back to huening. his face was the only one you'd look for in a crowd. even in passing, a stranger would cause you to stop dead in your tracks if they even slightly resembled your love. beomgyu called you 'desperate', but you thought of it more as lovesick in the best ways possible.

not long after you began dating, you found yourself in the kitchen of his dormitory, the movie the four other boys watching no longer important. you were dancing slowly to the movies soundtrack, and it felt like a dream. a childish dream, one that your friends would call immature. but a dream is a dream, no matter how silly it may seem to others.

it was moments like those that made huening kai so easily to love. he was vulnerable and caring - the knight in shining armor. his love was so genuine it wouldn’t surprise you if hundreds of years from now, scholars analyzed it and taught about it in classrooms. there was something so pure about huening kai and the way he loved.

love like that only comes by once in a lifetime. both you and kai were aware of that. in kai’s eyes, someone like you was such an anomaly itself that he thanked all his lucky stars he was even allowed to know you. as selfish as it was, he wanted you all for himself. to have, and to hold, all the ideals expressed in vows. you were practically the only person to exist in his eyes, and all he could do was hope his loving was never too much.

pray that he was never too affectionate. never too insecure. never too much of anything.

you made huening kai believe in love.

and no matter what the voices in his head would say, kai was the definition of love to you. everything about the way he was crafted - a child of aphrodite. son of the goddess of love and beauty. hand sculpted from her own mind.

of course he blushed like a madman whenever you would make the comparison, but even yeonjun would giggle in agreement. hueningkai was so loved by all, it was surprising no one else had dated him for long periods of time, at least not until you.

at times, loving huening kai felt like romance out of one of the animes he'd watch. two characters who know next to nothing about love finding each other, and finding out what it means.

those were all the best things about being in love with huening kai. even if he loved with all of himself. even if he was hurt easily.

loving huening kai was not a reward, like some would think. and it was not an honor. nor was it a gift. it was something else entirely. at times it felt like a blessing, but love is not something that is earned in a contest. it is something grown. carefully coddled with loving hands, allowing it to bloom in its own time.

and while not all love was like that, that is exactly what it was like to love huening kai, and for huening kai to love you.

no matter how many times the two of you would fight, how many times you would storm out crying. no matter how many times it felt like your heart had been shredded to pieces, that invisible string would tug. and it would tug, and tug, and tug until you winded up in kai's arms again. because that is what love truly was.

and huening kai would forever and always be your only love.

a/n: ok this is my favorite thing i’ve ever written!!! the time crunch was crunching!!!!

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