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Stormlight Archive review of all 5 books + 2 novellas (Brandon Sanderson)

i dont know how to start this

i got a pran, a pran of cingles

stormlight archive fuckin sucks and im going to try to explain why

actually, a small disclaimer. an interesting thing i learned about brandon was that in 2019 he visited shitrael as he was invited to some ‘con. now, one could argue, for example, he didnt know what shitrael was doing to Palestine. unfortunately, i also learned that his fans had protested and told him not to go, to which brandon responded with something along the lines of “i dont believe in boycotting” or “boycotting doesnt work” or some shit. “Another lesser-known issue is Sanderson’s visit to Israel in 2019 as a guest of honor for the science fiction and fantasy convention, ICon. In an interview with The Jerusalem Post, Sanderson expressed that the invitation was one that some asked him to declined stating, “My general inclination is I don’t generally boycott no matter what. I don’t think it’s an effective way to cause social change. I think there are other and better ways. So I didn’t agree with these requests.”” from expertbooksmuggler. now, i literally had to google if brandon is american. he is, he was born in nebraska in like 1970s or something. one of the most famous boycotts of all time in this country is the Rosa Parks Bus Boycott. which worked. to claim boycotting doesnt work is profoundly stupid thing to say. so either brandon is horrifically ignorant and doesnt know of the hundreds of boycotts that have worked and are working today, or he supports shitrael. i cant buy that he just doesnt know. all of this is to say, i no longer wish to support this author for this reason and also multiple reasons of genuinely problematic things i found in these books. its also to let you know that i know, and i can let you know.

this review is not very well organised at all. so if you thought youd read the review until i said “ok spoilers for oathbringer” then stop, dont do that. im going to be spoiling all 5 books plus novellas all over the place during this review, this is only suitable to read if you dont care for spoilers or have already read the books.

SOME MATH: Those last two hundred or so pages are usually great, but I have to ask myself if the rest of the book can stand on equal footing. if only the end of a book is the good part, why should i read any of it? im not going to play a game for 50 hours because "it gets good at max level" or some shit, it should be good IMMEDIATELY. same goes for books. if someone recommends me a 1k page book and says "it gets good at 800 pages in" im not reading that shit. this the entirety of StAr reading experience. i did a little bit of fucked up math. lets claim the average reading speed 200 words per minute, 400 words on the page. 3-4 mins on a page. average time spent on reading a day, 15-20m. 4500 words a day. 320,000 words in 800 pages. 71 days or 1700 hours. math is probably wrong, but you get the point..

FILLER: lets be real, the way of kings is just a giant prologue... 1k pages of set up. id argue someone could start the series at words of radiance and treat way of kings as a .5 prequel and theyd be completely fine tbh. theres an insane amount of filler in these books, considering if they were edited by someone with a brain, theyd still be 500-700+ page books. length of book =/ epic... compare to lotr: its considered the greatest epic fantasy of all time (i think) and tolkien achieved that in... about 1500 pages. or the hobbit, which is barely 300 pages..

filler is a horrible problem in these books, as ive already noted. now i cant remember when this particular interlude happened, but its not a spoiler anyway lol. either in radiance or oathbringer, we get a random pov from some herdazian man who is about to get executed and the judge or wtv gives him the option to get beheaded or get "the hog" while oiled up. the hog turns out to be some giant sea creature or something. the interlude chapter ends. it never comes up again... at first i thought lopen, being herdazian, would make some sort of joke about the hog and we'd be like ahh i saw that. but no. and its like, are you fucking serious? this book is 1k pages long and we still get this random ass filler? ??? im so confused..

for a bunch of 1k+ books with filler, why the fuck are we missing giant, pivotal moments that we shouldve seen? for example: in oathbringer, jasnah just. coming back. people thought she was dead for months, and we dont get any scenes with her reuniting with her family and shallan???? what lol??? when her death is revealed by shallan to navani and dalinar, navani mopes for a bit, then forgors when shallan almost dies (doesnt unfortunately) but her death goes strangely unmentioned for the rest of the book... elhokar literally started a war over the murder of his father, yet when his sister is murdered he doesnt give a shit? what?

in rhythm, I kept wondering how many more chapters filled with science experiments I could endure before I would officially give up. theres no way anybody , even die hard fans, give enough of a shit about the science of this world to read multiple page long chapters that go on and on about the fucking fabrials. like, its great that you have this information as a writer of fantasy. however, WE DONT NEED ALL THE FUCKIN DETAILS!!!! if I wanted to read about this many god damn experiments I would have majored in a fucking science. the only good part of those chapters were raboniel, and of course the manipulative navani kills her, giving me another reason to hate her..

taravangian: why yes, do please tell me again (for the 100th time!) that Tara is dumb/smart depending on the day. you did not make this point very clear in the previous novel, so do please repeat it every other sentence when it is a Tara chapter. every. single. time. this is actually a little bit of this telling not showing thing that happens a lot in these books. couldve just SHOWN us he was stupid or smart that day with his tests or thoughts or whatever but nah you had to just tell us directly

adolin: in wind and truth, I cannot figure out why every single Adolin chapter has to rehash his feelings towards his father. We heard about them 30 pages ago, we don't need it again, I have memory. the worst part of this book is just how little of a real story is present. For each of the ten "days" very little actually happens. Adolin, for instance, starts the book making a forlorn last stand at a fortress. by day eight, 900 pages later, he's still there doing the same thing. Kaladin starts off on an epic fetch quest, in which he visits about a dozen essentially identical locations (including recursive versions in flashbacks) with no sense of unravelling mystery or significance. by the end of the book, he's still doing the same thing.

for a book with 1.3k pages, there is insane amount of filler, "balanced" by completely ignoring massive events that happen in the book. kaladin finally getting his bridge four tattoo: like one sentence. taln waking up and fighting his way through multiple fused to defend people and dying: literally off screen. fuck even dalinars death is off screen. and i really wouldve loved to see him die. he didnt burn alive like he deserved to but I DESERVED TO WATCH HIM FUCKING DIE!!! also: shallans mom being chana, oh who cares i didnt either... gavinor being 20 years older, nobody cares about that, he kinda just disappears at the end. youd think he’d be hanging around dalinars body and people would be like who the fuck is this guy but nah and last, the issues of how the 10 day format caused the plot to be static and stall for 1k pages lol. first 100-200 pages, ok, last 100-200 pages, ok, inbetween? why am i still here.... just to suffer...

ROMANCE: brandon, i believe has said he hates writing romance and it shows... im gone say it: if navani was a man, you would hate her. IF NAVANI WAS A MAN YOUD HATE HER!!! she literally coerces dalinar into getting with her like 3 times, he constantly saying no every single time, practically begging her to leave him alone until he finally gives in and gets with her. how do yall like her? if their roles were swapped, you would fucking hate dalinar for constantly harassing navani, but since the woman did it, i guess its fine.. the hypocrisy is fucking crazy

the fucking betrothal... apparently this is a unpopular opinion, but frankly i dont give a fuck if your book takes place in a fantasy world with 0 concept of pedophilia*... as the author, you have the choice to make your characters ages the way they are... why the fuck is shallan 17 and adolin 25 grown ass man? if this was real world, hes be in jail bruh. and its supposed to be romantic... his CONTINUED SEXISM!!! which shallan literally notices but AGAIN is not mentioned or confronted. wtf? note its like when i read a classic from 1800s and its racist as fuck and i go i dont like this book its racist as fuck then every fucker and his mother come to tell me noooo its from the 1800s it was ok to be racist then. ok? i dont give a fuck racism is bad now it was bad then.. i dont care whats normal for the time lol. im going to dislike it, and again, as a fantasy writer, you literally have the option to age up or down your characters, there was no need for this straight up fucking pedophilia. idk if im reaching, but i seriously feel like a lot of authors write fantasy like theyre writing historical fiction. youre writing fantasy... youve created your own religions, cultures etc just for them to have the exact same problems we have/had in medieval times. sexism? (including child marriage apparently, with the girl kaladin had a crush on get married at 14/15 to a man who had to be 45+ and nobody gives a shit. also the thing brandon did where she ended up actually liking/loving him is kinda fuckin weird. girl no shes a fucking victim of pedophilia, forced marriage and hell, stockholm syndrome too apparently. we not doing this fuckin noooo she actually ended up loving him uwu) racism? slavery? you betcha, for everyone even. like girl write fantasy. yk what the real fantasy would be? 0 prejudice. world fuckin peace. i mean cmon get creative here..

again: terrible romance. i mildly rooted for shallan and kal to get together, because they are at least closer in age... but frankly she shouldve stayed single. this is another problem in the series that seems to come up, why it seems all main female characters are, really, FORCED to get into relationships with men, (for example jasnah and wit getting together for no reason at all). maybe i am reaching here but it just seems weird, especially considering that all the relationships suck such massive unwashed cock. NOT TO MENTION... despite shallan spending more time in oathbringer thinking about kaladin and how hot he is, (we spend time in adolin and shallan pov, they hardly think about each other??) somehow she and adolin "love" each other after 3 months of meeting. Why? Why The Fuck? not to mention AGAIN adolins BLATANT SEXISM at the end where he says "ill let him have you", shallan repeats it like she couldnt believe he said that, then adolin is like "dont make this harder :(((" then shallan goes on an unbelieveable speech about how she loves and wants to fuck adolin. wow. turns out sexism works when you use it on a 17 year old girl who has no self worth to fall back on. TAKE NOTES GUYS!!!! no wonder he DOESNT FUCKING GROW!!

rlain and renarin: while rlain and renarins relationship is great to see in a sanderson book, its not well written at all. It’s partially the fault of the fact that Sanderson didn’t know what to do with Renarin’s character, partially the fault of the fact that Sanderson has positioned Rlain as The Token Parshendi. rlain and renarin get so little screen time that when they get together i dont believe it... we’ve SEEN them interact like 3 times so we never see any sort of friendship grow at all. so i couldnt give less of a fuck about their relationship because i dont know or care about these fucking people. yay gay written by a mormon i guess guys look hes not homophobic... this literally wouldve been fixed by giving renarin or rlain or both a fucking pov in earlier books but nah. "im worried to write gay characters because im scared to mess it up" heres a hint sanderson. WRITE THEM AS PEOPLE WHO HAPPEN TO BE GAY!!!! Finally, I’ve been uncomfortable with how Sanderson handles Rlain’s character since the Bridge Four days. His role here feels very similar to that of the Listeners in the context of the war. He experiences xenophobia throughout the series, and that’s never really been addressed.

GENUINELY PROBLEMATIC THINGS:

In this book, Shallan says, "Slavery was a mercy for the lower classes." The darkeyes. Sanderson goes out of his way to highlight the different schools of thought, as though he is setting up for a rebellion.(which never happens) But Shallan is so accepting of slavery that it rubs me wrongly. Her nickname for Kaladin throughout the book is "bridgeboy," (as with adolin) which is a reference to his role as a slave. Why is a main character sympathetic to enslaving darkeyes? idk if im reaching, but if i was kaladin, i would not want to be reminded of the part of my life where i literally considered suicide as an escape. not only “bridgeman” - bridge BOY. even more disrespectful as fuck. reminding him of slavery, and also demeaning the fuck out of him, for no reason. adolin starts calling him that out of racism i guess, all because kaladin took control of a situation where adolin was an emotional bitch and couldnt get anything done. be grateful, dickhead. he saved your child killing father... (at the very least, stop calling him bridgeboy..)

when moash gets shard plate and then Kaladin becoming a full Surgebinder they both have their eyes lighten. At face value, it appears brandon is giving credence to the misguided class system. but guess what? by the end of these books, THIS DOESNT FUCKIN MATTER!!!! nobody cares!!! do you have any idea the implications of this??? its like if in this world there was some legit honest to god proof of white superiority, what the fuck would happen? it would be fucking chaos. itd probably be WAR!!! but these people just dont care, that there seems to be legit validity to light eyes being better

also .. man writing women syndrome galore lol. really none of the women in this series are likeable and written badly... just,, this quote from jasnah: “used a fetching face to make men do as you wish is no different from a man using muscle to force a woman to his will” im sorry... in what world is jasnah saying that? nobody with a brain should be saying that and we've already established that jasnah is very big brain lol. i think shallans entire character is men writing women, which is probably why people dislike her so much. and then manipulative navani

the racism/classism dropped plotline was the worst blow. you start the series off with the main focus being a slave who fights against an oppressive system. can you imagine just two books later you have him fully assimilated INTO the very system that enslaved him and he doesn’t even care? you’d imagine with the parshmen gone, darkeye oppression and slavery would be expanded greatly but Kaladin just doesn’t really care and neither does the narrative.

stormlight healing disabilies: why.. why is this a thing?? and nobody ever talks about it.. yeah sure its a society where they dont care about people with disabilities, but idk i was hoping for some commentary on this? maybe the people in question thinking, "hmm.. stormlight healed my seizures. was i not worthy of being a knight radiant with seizures and having to wear glasses?" (as much as having to wear glasses is a disability, its never explained how badly renarin actually needed his glasses, and when he suddenly stops wearing them, NEITHER HIS FATHER OR HIS BROTHER gives a shit and never asks about it.) its very strange. yk whats sad, when renarin was revealed to have seizures, i thought oh cool, ive only read one other book with a chara with seizures. oh neverfuckingmind its healed. i remember someone saying that it was cool renarin wore glasses. well thats healed too lmao. in wind and truth dabbid is followed around by a windspren before kaladin leaves. the guy near kaladin is like yeah dabbids had that for a while he hasnt noticed. then proceeds to say "you think itll fix his problem?" what is this trying to insinuate? he has a speech impediment, thats the only “problem” he has. and why was he singled out with rlain at the beginning to not be a squire anyway? because of the battle shock? or because he slurs? and wtf does that mean? it never goes anywhere and it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. like constantly this shit that seems like everybody has to be healed by stormlight their disabilities and everybody agrees is really disturbing. people are like omg rysn!!! disabled rep waaaowoow like girl did you read the other fucking books? and shes such a background side character that doesnt even matter in the first 5 books that i dont understand what the fucks to be praised anyway…

dalinar, love him not being able to handle his war crimes, but i love even more manipulative navani ENABLING his alcohol addiction is insane LMFAO can we get a wife of the year award? she has the audacity to think "why are men allowed to be sad and drink and i have to do all the work" ???? what the fuck are you talking about? YOURE GIVING HIM THE ALCOHOL TO GET DRUNK ON!!! WHAT!?!?!?!? this bitches audacity fucking pisses be off the whole book. my blood pressure rises and i get dizzy with hate. i never liked her. i hope she dies horribly (unfortunately, i guess ill never know. at least she went into a coma, people can get a break from her manipulations.) on that note, gavilar was a piece of shit, but when he calls her out for marrying him for the power and wealth she has the audacity to get mad at him? wahhh my husband doesnt love and respect me wahhh you literally married him for power and then married his brother who is just as bad or arguably worse… for the power and wealth again. i like how it tried to tell me otherwise in rhythm where navani thinks to herself she doesnt want power or wealth and yet married gavinor. so did you marry him because you loved him? because you didnt… (also the part where she considers herself a good wife and mother. my pubic hairs are a better mother. fuck you mean)

dalinar: why do people suck dalinars cock so much, calling him a holy man when hes murdered children via fire and his wife and abused/neglected his own children.(granted this part nobody knows or can accept) if HES holy am i God? i mean seriously, even in this shitty society where they glorify murder, how the fuck are they okay with the burning of a city, the direct murder of children and his wife which btw he had zero remorse for? perhaps he left the remorselessness out of his little book, but in the real thing he couldnt have gave less of a shit... he just felt ah damn gavilar is going to beat my ass for this :\ also the end of part one of rhythm where hes "lamenting" on those murdered children that horns navani up so much they fuck? holy shit that child killer cock must go crazy. that power hungry vagina must be hungry. holy shit. if i fucked for power i would at least not be so god damn obvious or having a lack of morals. if the guy i was fucking for power was revealed to be a child murderer and wife killer i would be like dam that power dont taste that good no more

in rhythm of war, the sibling constantly dislikes navani for imprisoning spren to be used in fabrials. navani says that the other spren have said that the fabrial spren are mindless and therefore it is fine to use them in fabrials. thats weird. that is also the exact same argument they used for the slaveform parshmen, that they were mindless and therefore it is ok to use them as slaves...(this goes nowhere)

while the prejudice against people with differently coloured eyes is a mildly interesting concept, it kinda crashes when it seems the only people with eyes considered "dark" are brown only, and then i did some bare minimum googling and according to the top page first answer, 20-30% of caucasians have brown eyes, 70-80% of Black people have brown eyes, 80-90% of Asians have brown eyes, and 60-80% of Hispanic/Latino have brown eyes. (give or take in accuracy) why do i bring this up? because i remember distinctly that renarin in oathbringer was described as having "sapphire eyes". sapphires are almost always extremely dark blue, with some exceptions, (and also pink sapphires exist apparently). but he is considered light eyed, so do dark green and dark blue not count as DARK eyes? if only brown eyes are considered dark eyes, it kinda just falls back on racism toward brown and Black people again

bad rep with shallans personality disorder… now i dont have a lot i can say about this as i know next to nothing about personality disorders. however, one thing i can say, is that one “stereotype” of people with these disorders is they always have a personality/es that are violent and aggressive. and of course shallan has a violent personality that murdered ialai without her knowing. waaaoww…

why are victims forgiving their abusers? again, something i cant say too much on, but in oathbringer, dalinar claims he hears evi’s voice saying she forgives him. excuse the fuck out of me? she was verbally abused and therefore a victim of domestic abuse… why are we writing her forgiving him? especially after her noticing dalinar actively pretending renarin doesnt exist, and then you know, the part where he burned her alive ALONG WITH CHILDREN AND WOMEN??? on that note, in wind and truth, renarin has a fleeting thought that he has some “resentment” for his father, but doesnt expand on what. explain to me pls, the resentment. the neglect part? the part where he murdered your mother who was the only one in your family apparently to give a shit about you? do pray tell, what the resentment is for. this is never brought up again

Dalinar is as bad as the rapists in the army. in oathbringer, dalinar comes up to sadeas and there is a group of women who are 100% going to be given to soldiers for rape, as thats the only thing soldiers are good at in every reality apparently. i called dalinar a rapist, and someone said they dont think he was. ok. in brandons narrative, he isnt. realistically? yes. he is. but ok, but looks at this scene instead. as commander (i think he was… correct me if im wrong) (or at least a brother to the KING) he should be able to tell his soldiers to not be fucking horrible. He does not do this. when sadeas makes a remark about “looking forward to tonight”, dalinar doesnt even fucking blink. let me explain something to you guys. ill hold your hand. lets make a venn diagram. on the left side, there is a big circle, this circle is the normal people circle. on the right side, there is another big circle. this circle is the creatures who are rapists. these circles dont overlap/ there is another smaller circle. this circle is people who are silent, and do not speak up or stop things that are in their power to do so. where does this circle go? ill give you a hint. NOT IN THE NORMAL PEOPLE CIRCLE!!! you cannot be fucking neutral on shit like that. therefore, dalinar is just as bad as his rapist soldiers.

DEUS EX MACHINA GALORE: everything just conveniently good happens to the characters... in words of radiance, shallan: somehow manages to go into shadesmar just enough to set the ship on fire, survives drowning because of a FUCKING SANTHID which is NEVER EXPLAINED???? like, they know nothing about santhids. if we actually knew things about santhids, brandon could say they are like dolphins in which dolphins sometimes will randomly save a drowning person. deus ex machina? sure. believable? yes. a random nanthid which nobody knows anything about much less what they even look like? she should’ve died… and make the books slightly better! manages to persuade all those bandits or whatever into keeping her alive and they r just like aight. only one who tries to kill her is tyn who of course failed. also she becomes a master con artist so fuckin fast, especially considering how limited tyns lessons were.

kaladin: only thing i can remember is that god damn shardblade wound, which is literally supposed to be unrecoverable, but jk he drinks a healing potion from skyrim and it doesnt fuckin matter. i was like holy shit his fucking arm is fuckin gone what he gone do???? oh jk.

jasnah: somehow survives a fucking knife to the chest (can claim she used stormlight i guess), manages to teleport herself into shadesmar and proceeds to survive there for multiple months

also szeth: strangely brandon seems unable to kill characters in this series having jasnah survive impossibly bc why not, which is weird cause honestly if she died, i dont think anything fundamental wouldve changed about the books at all. shes a completely useless character… and also szeth gets approached by a fuckin god for some reason and hes like "ur cool here get resurrected like jesus. also you get an annoying sword”

dalinar randomly bonding with stormfather by just saying random words. i thought the whole point of becoming radiant was the spren in question had to really pick and choose who their knight would be and it would be about genuine intent and shit and they had to choose to possibly sacrifice themself and die but apparently u can just say some words accidentally as shown in dawnshard with lopen and the spren will go ah fuck we bonded now. not to mention, wind and truth completely just, abolished knights radiant so we go from, a spren picking a choosing and potentially sacrificing themselves all the way to... you dont even have to be bonded to have third and fourth ideals (which are apparently very difficult to achieve) swords and armour, all because adolin just talked to his fucking armour and sword sometimes. are you serious? so whats the point of radiants..probably think, oh what about their powers? well fuck what about them? truthwatcher? i dont even know what those fuckers do. elsecaller portals? who gives a shit, seems everyone can accidentally themselves into shadesmar anyway. windrunner and skybreakers seem the exact same fuckin radiant with flight... i cant even remember what the others are. they seriously seem obsolete..

no stakes: nobody can fucking die. not even a (important) minor character dies or takes a lasting injury. in oathbringer, adolin gets stabbed, and theres no way anybody worried he was going to die, no dalinar becomes god and miraculously frees them from shadesmar right where renarin is so he can heal adolin. coo. the stakes are rapidly decreasing to me in that way and reduces the fun of the action. when characters are constantly healing and battling off insurmountable odds without any failure I just lose interest. stormlight shouldve never been this powerful tbh that was a horrible decision, which couldve been solved by just not having it heal at all. or maybe keeping the cleric-like radiants (truthwatcher and edgedancer) be the healers of the group, and only they could heal other people and themselves, but nobody else can do that) good to know a character can just pause the game skyrim style and eat cheese and be fine lol

Shallan and Kaladin going through the same things they went through in the earlier books, again? Shallan has another deep dark secret? What did she do this time, drown her grandmother? Kaladin is depressed? sure do hope he snaps out of it before the big finale.. (hint, thats not how depression works… source: im depressed)

Wit becomes an insufferable vehicle of exposition and deus ex machina. Wit in the last two books is completely unlike himself in the first 3 books. I understand the stakes have changed for him, but as was the case for so many other characters, his allure was completely abandoned because his unique voice was foregone. he’s never panicked or lost his composure, but in this book, it’s like he has never been composed in his life.

kaladin becoming a "therapist" felt extremely strange to me, for the entire book. there might have been much better ways to develop this aspect of his character, but straight up calling him a therapist, and then having him "cure" Szeth and his spren after a few days of conversation. i mean szeth literally after like day 4 is like, ok kaladin ur right... im going to kill myself instead :D and then two days later somehow is convinced that kaladin is right and actually hes not going to kill himself? ok.... And then curing Nale by literally playing a tune on a flute. it was so wildly far-fetched for me that I couldn't help but feel myself cringing. NOBODY - seriously, nobody - lives through the kinds of things that Szeth lived through and then finds healing and peace after a few days of therapy. Yet not only Szeth - a 7,000 year old Herald overcomes his mental obstacles just as quickly? buddy i havent even half the traumas of those two, had 2 years of therapy (searching for a new therapist :D ) and im still depressed AND im on anti depressants. i understand that it says multiple times that it takes time, but still that nale is able to snap out of his "fog" so quickly is insane. then ishar, well at least the flute playing didnt work on him, but saying an ideal did...somehow lol. despites szeth's 5th ideal not working, kaladin says the 5th ideal, blasts ishar back with a "burst of power" and when ishar wakes up hes like Holy Shit Im A Bad Person.

UNCATEGORISED: Elhokar: he is dead. his death had no effect on the story, nor the development of any of the characters. kaladin mopes for a bit, then his little depressive episode clears up after about (checks watch) 24 hours. he is almost practically forgotten about in the same chapter he is killed in. Navani cries for like a sentence when she hears the news, but swiftly moves on, he is never brought up again. no other characters brood over his death in a meaningful capacity, we don’t even get to see any kind of funeral rite for him.

There is a frustrating lack of gravitas in many scenes. Lift appears at the tailend of what was set to be one of the better chapters in oathbringer, when Dalinar first meets Odium, seemingly only to deflate any tension by making comments about his butt and how she dislikes old people. Szeth now has a sword that talks in the same particularly childish quippy way as Syl, who already talked in the same particularly childish quippy way as Shallan. its like a gd marvel movie, a moment cant go by without a stupid joke. please... shut... on that note, nightblood i believe is an insanely old consciousness, why is it so childish? i understand why syl was childish at the beginning, but she never grows, changes or matures in any way whatsoever as she gets her memories back

sadeas got killed by Adolin at the end of Words, nothing comes of it ever. there's a cursory investigation but when the copy-cat killings are revealed to be the work of one of the Unmade, it's forgotten until Dalinar wants to make Adolin king. so Adolin admits to killing Sedeas. and then nobody cares still. i was hoping for some real complications to rise from that. adolin had some guilt but it was barely a factor. also it never comes up again and nobody cares. aight. look, did sadeas deserve to die? yeah. but why does nobody care about finding the murderer? the copy cat killings had to be based on the original murder of sadeas, therefore, to everyones knowledge, the murderer is still at large. but its ok nobody cares ig

shadesmar: this is more of a personal opinion lol.. but shadesmar is so boring!! why are the spren just humans? its like reading a faery book and they are just hot humans. give me weird shit. i dont want humanoid beings with a strange "pattern" for a head. give me fuckin weird little imps and shit. nah not only do the spren take on human forms, they are just alethi most of the time. ?? its so boring.. for example, i was imagining the honourspren being like, translucent spriggans from skyrim. crypticspren incomprehensible shit. inkspren as some sort of squid sorta thing. like wtf get creative. youre writing a FANTASY PLEASE!!!!!!!!! why are they all humanoid im bored

im not convinced that renarin and adolin give a shit about each other. there are MULTIPLE instances where renarin is COMPLTELY forgotten and its like, brandon why the fuck did you even bother writing this character? way of kings, when adolin and dalinar come back from almost being fuckin massacred, renarin gives adolin the good ol clap on the shoulder. WHAT???? BUDDY YOUR BROTHER WAS ALMOST KILLED HUG HIM???? in rhythm, adolin is going to leave for shadesmar for who knows how long and who knows what dangers lie ahead. his shitty father talks to him and gives some speech and fucks off. renarin is NOT mentioned and nowhere to be found. why wouldnt he say goodbye to his brother hes supposed to care about? again, in wind and truth, adolin goes off to azir to fight again unknowable dangers and can possibly die as he isnt a radiant to heal himself. renarin is nowhere to be found and never says goodbye. in wind and truth or rhythm, dalinar is playing with gavinor and lamenting he didnt witness more of adolins childhood. renarin is NOT mentioned. this is a huge tell not show thing because i think its mentioned a few times how adolin cares about renarin and vice versa, but i dont see any god damn proof of this.

the spiritual realm: in wind and truth, our next big disappointment was the Spiritual Realm. we were, again, led to believe that this realm is extremely dangerous: Wit and the gods were supposedly afraid of the Spiritual Realm because it was difficult to navigate, time was easy to lose, and you couldn’t know what to expect. it turned out, however, that the Spiritual Realm is just a mindscape-style place that was rather easy to navigate when you actually try for more than 2 seconds. the most difficult part of being in the Spiritual Realm is, apparently, confronting yourself/your history. we’re again in a situation where I feel like I’m supposed to be impressed or enraptured by the new setting and overlook how dreadfully boring the plot occurring there is. what a god can do in the spiritual realm is so confusing. what tara cant do: find radiants when their spren is hiding them. what he can do: recreate a fucking simulation of an entire city and its people

dalinar: he had one job and he fucked it up astronomically. and this is the most unforgivable part for me. when faced with Adult Gav, Dalinar proves he has learned nothing from his jouney of the past five books. he does not even TRY to save his grandson, or to reconcile with him. not even when adult Gav is frozen by Odiom, not even when he is visibly weeping because he knows he was deceived. Danilar doesn't even fucking try. No apologies, no "I love you's", no "we didn't know and if we had, we would have torn the whole Cosmere apart trying to find you's." The only options he sees are "Kill grandson" or "let grandson kill me." He doesn't even fucking try to find a third option. The Bondsmith doesn't even try to reinforce the most important bonds of all: those of his own damn family.* Had he been able to get through to Gav, and to in turn persuade Gav to surrender, he could have so easily won everything. *note of course this isnt surprising how shit he treats his entire family considering he hated, verbally abused and eventually murdered his wife, (who nobody forced him to marry btw) and also neglected his sons, and even when he got "better" he still had a clear favourite in adolin and continued to pretend renarin didnt exist because he had seizures i guess. the moment renarin revealed himself as truthwatcher, suddenly dalinar is like holy shit i forgot about this one. anyway, he decides to pass the entire problem on to the next generation. but not before making the absolutely batshit decision to abandon his oaths, allowing Odium to kill the Stormfather and assume true supervillain status. and, through the killing the Stormfather, he has also allowed the planet to be stripped of its most important resource, not just for the Radiants, but for the world economy. Dalinar has single-handedly undone centuries of societal progress. he makes the most self-centered decision he can possibly make, and fucks everyone else in the process. And all of Roshar is going to hail him as a hero for it. (see: wit going holy shit hes a genius just so people can continue to dick ride him is insane bruv) its literally like "wow! he made the situation worse 100x, kills himself and leaves it for the next generation! what a hero!” ????? in this world when old people leave shit for us younger generations ,we hate them usually..

other thoughts: this is more of a personal Hot take but I believe that the Cosmere with its characters and lore that connect brandons different stories works best when it's kept as a simple framing device. as his stories have expanded to includ more and more characters from different worlds, it feel like he loses focus on the important character of those stories. it also leads to a lot more bloat and is probably the reason that this is his longest book yet.

theres also a problem i noticed in this book especially of strange modern language being used a lot, making me think perhaps an editor does not exist..? (i cant remember if the previous books had this problem) examples: "literally" (i never saw that used before) "therapy/therapist" you can claim wit introduced them to this words but idk... "alcohol" instead of wine like previous books. randomly mentioned is "200 proof alcohol" huh? when the fuck they start doin that? lift using the word "hot" to say attractive, again, has never been used in this way before. kaladin randomly says "okay", nobody has ever said okay before. there can be something said for the word “awesome” being used (100% by lift) the way it is. the first version of awesome used was to indicate horror or fear, as opposed to our modern use to indicate amazement. lift uses this modern version, and compared with nobody else using the word awesome ever, its very jarring

in wind and truth, both sigzil and child killer break their oaths and kill their spren for some greater good (?) however, in the same book and literally the same day, szeth casually releases his spren from their bond and his spren does not go deadeyed and is perfectly fine. are you telling me this entire time the radiants couldve just "i release you from your oaths" and the spren wouldve been fine? nobody tried that ever? they just immediately jumped to, "i renounce my oaths" rather than a more kinder "i release you from your bond". granted, the radiants from 4k years ago didnt know the spren would go deadeyed, but i still dont understand why they never tried that out of curiosity. not to mention, renouncing your oaths required you to genuinely believe that. also, szeth easily releasing his spren from the bond and not killing him makes sigzil and dalinars decision more stupid

correct me if im wrong, but im pretty sure may aladar isnt among the women adolin was sexist to in the first few books, so as far as i can remember shes introduced in wind and truth. why the fuck is her name may, when we already have an established character whose nickname is maya??? no joke, i literally got confused multiple times on which may/a was talking.. you are writing a fantasy book and have 74 billion options for names and you pick one thats one letter off from an established character

writing in world swear words is all well and good but i dont understand what type of swear "storms" (and other storm words) is supposed to be when everybody and their mother will say it for anything and everything, so it makes me think its a "mild" swear word like crap or frick, but then there are times when it sounds more like a "fuck" like for example in rhythm of war and lirin is trying to stop kaladin from fighting and possibily getting his family killed , kaladin says "storm you" (which first of all, kinda cringe i aint even gone lie) which SOUNDS like a "fuck you" moment, but again, everybody uses "storm" for everything and everyone so i just dont understand what type of swear word it is. take it from someone who swears like a sailor- in books (and other media) i think swears should only be used when they could have a real impact. if "storm" etc was replaced with "fuck" and "shit" etc i imagine there might even be complaints about how, perhaps, immature the characters sound when they are swearing all the time. i think "storm" shouldve been used a LOT less than it was, because it was hard to tell what kind of emotion (?) the character had when they were using it, and again idk the severity of the word in the moment when it is used

why does mayalaran talk so modernly? the last time she was alive was 4 thousand years ago, she should be speaking the equivalent of ye olde english (hell, the language the people spoke 4k years ago was described as a whole different language) and people having a hard time understanding her and vise versa, but for some reason she speaks their modern common tongue extremely well, even calling adolin a slut at some point. where did she learn to speak their modern language? shes been practically unconscious for 4 thousand years with no one teaching her that. on that note, why does everyone in the visions speak again ,perfect modern common tongue? apparently with child killers bondsmith powers he can understand them, but this doesnt explain why in other POVs they also understand them perfectly

this is a little nitpick but the pursuer was written kinda shit. so youre telling me this guy has made a tradition in hunting down humans that killed him? ...so hes been killed by humans multiple times before enough for him to make it a tradition? it doesnt make him seem competent or scary at all if hes so easily killed… instead, it wouldve been better if kaladin was the first human that killed him, and it enraged him so much that he demanded to be the only one to kill him, thus turning him into the pursuer. otherwise, i feel like i can take on this guy with a kitchen knife lol

END: im going to end this essay by quoting a review i saw on storygraph (who then quoted it from reddit) which pretty much summarises the main problem with these books: "A book needs to be able to stand on its own, not just be a vehicle to provide context for previous novels and propel future novels."

#book #books #book review #bookblr #brandon sanderson #stormlight archive #stormlight archive review #rant review #the way of kings #words of radiance #oathbringer #rhythm of war #wind and truth #dawnshard #edgedancer

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imgunnagetyou · 5 months ago

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Words for Skin Tone | How to Describe Skin Color

We discussed the issues describing People of Color by means of food in Part I of this guide, which brought rise to even more questions, mostly along the lines of “So, if food’s not an option, what can I use?” Well, I was just getting to that!

This final portion focuses on describing skin tone, with photo and passage examples provided throughout. I hope to cover everything from the use of straight-forward description to the more creatively-inclined, keeping in mind the questions we’ve received on this topic.

Standard Description

Basic Colors

Pictured above: Black, Brown, Beige, White, Pink.

“She had brown skin.”

This is a perfectly fine description that, while not providing the most detail, works well and will never become cliché.

Describing characters’ skin as simply brown or beige works on its own, though it’s not particularly telling just from the range in brown alone.

Complex Colors

These are more rarely used words that actually “mean” their color. Some of these have multiple meanings, so you’ll want to look into those to determine what other associations a word might have.

Pictured above: Umber, Sepia, Ochre, Russet, Terra-cotta, Gold, Tawny, Taupe, Khaki, Fawn.

Complex colors work well alone, though often pair well with a basic color in regards to narrowing down shade/tone.

For example: Golden brown, russet brown, tawny beige…

As some of these are on the “rare” side, sliding in a definition of the word within the sentence itself may help readers who are unfamiliar with the term visualize the color without seeking a dictionary.

“He was tall and slim, his skin a russet, reddish-brown.”

Comparisons to familiar colors or visuals are also helpful:

“His skin was an ochre color, much like the mellow-brown light that bathed the forest.”

Modifiers

Modifiers, often adjectives, make partial changes to a word.The following words are descriptors in reference to skin tone.

Dark - Deep - Rich - Cool

Warm - Medium - Tan

Fair - Light - Pale

Rich Black, Dark brown, Warm beige, Pale pink…

If you’re looking to get more specific than “brown,” modifiers narrow down shade further.

Keep in mind that these modifiers are not exactly colors.

As an already brown-skinned person, I get tan from a lot of sun and resultingly become a darker, deeper brown. I turn a pale, more yellow-brown in the winter.

While best used in combination with a color, I suppose words like “tan” “fair” and “light” do work alone; just note that tan is less likely to be taken for “naturally tan” and much more likely a tanned White person.

Calling someone “dark” as description on its own is offensive to some and also ambiguous. (See: Describing Skin as Dark)

Undertones

Undertones are the colors beneath the skin, seeing as skin isn’t just one even color but has more subdued tones within the dominating palette.

pictured above: warm / earth undertones: yellow, golden, copper, olive, bronze, orange, orange-red, coral | cool / jewel undertones: pink, red, blue, blue-red, rose, magenta, sapphire, silver.

Mentioning the undertones within a character’s skin is an even more precise way to denote skin tone.

As shown, there’s a difference between say, brown skin with warm orange-red undertones (Kelly Rowland) and brown skin with cool, jewel undertones (Rutina Wesley).

“A dazzling smile revealed the bronze glow at her cheeks.”

“He always looked as if he’d ran a mile, a constant tinge of pink under his tawny skin.”

Standard Description Passage

“Farah’s skin, always fawn, had burned and freckled under the summer’s sun. Even at the cusp of autumn, an uneven tan clung to her skin like burrs. So unlike the smooth, red-brown ochre of her mother, which the sun had richened to a blessing.”

-From my story “Where Summer Ends” featured in Strange Little Girls

Here the state of skin also gives insight on character.

Note my use of “fawn” in regards to multiple meaning and association. While fawn is a color, it’s also a small, timid deer, which describes this very traumatized character of mine perfectly.

Though I use standard descriptions of skin tone more in my writing, at the same time I’m no stranger to creative descriptions, and do enjoy the occasional artsy detail of a character.

Creative Description

Whether compared to night-cast rivers or day’s first light…I actually enjoy seeing Characters of Colors dressed in artful detail.

I’ve read loads of descriptions in my day of white characters and their “smooth rose-tinged ivory skin”, while the PoC, if there, are reduced to something from a candy bowl or a Starbucks drink, so to actually read of PoC described in lavish detail can be somewhat of a treat.

Still, be mindful when you get creative with your character descriptions. Too many frills can become purple-prose-like, so do what feels right for your writing when and where. Not every character or scene warrants a creative description, either. Especially if they’re not even a secondary character.

Using a combination of color descriptions from standard to creative is probably a better method than straight creative. But again, do what’s good for your tale.

Natural Settings - Sky

Pictured above: Harvest Moon -Twilight, Fall/Autumn Leaves, Clay, Desert/Sahara, Sunlight - Sunrise - Sunset - Afterglow - Dawn- Day- Daybreak, Field - Prairie - Wheat, Mountain/Cliff, Beach/Sand/Straw/Hay.

Now before you run off to compare your heroine’s skin to the harvest moon or a cliff side, think about the associations to your words.

When I think cliff, I think of jagged, perilous, rough. I hear sand and picture grainy, yet smooth. Calm. mellow.

So consider your character and what you see fit to compare them to.

Also consider whose perspective you’re describing them from. Someone describing a person they revere or admire may have a more pleasant, loftier description than someone who can’t stand the person.

“Her face was like the fire-gold glow of dawn, lifting my gaze, drawing me in.”

“She had a sandy complexion, smooth and tawny.”

Even creative descriptions tend to draw help from your standard words.

Flowers

Pictured above: Calla lilies, Western Coneflower, Hazel Fay, Hibiscus, Freesia, Rose

It was a bit difficult to find flowers to my liking that didn’t have a 20 character name or wasn’t called something like “chocolate silk” so these are the finalists.

You’ll definitely want to avoid purple-prose here.

Also be aware of flowers that most might’ve never heard of. Roses are easy, as most know the look and coloring(s) of this plant. But Western coneflowers? Calla lilies? Maybe not so much.

“He entered the cottage in a huff, cheeks a blushing brown like the flowers Nana planted right under my window. Hazel Fay she called them, was it?”

Assorted Plants & Nature

Pictured above: Cattails, Seashell, Driftwood, Pinecone, Acorn, Amber

These ones are kinda odd. Perhaps because I’ve never seen these in comparison to skin tone, With the exception of amber.

At least they’re common enough that most may have an idea what you’re talking about at the mention of “pinecone."

I suggest reading out your sentences aloud to get a better feel of how it’ll sounds.

"Auburn hair swept past pointed ears, set around a face like an acorn both in shape and shade.”

I pictured some tree-dwelling being or person from a fantasy world in this example, which makes the comparison more appropriate.

I don’t suggest using a comparison just “cuz you can” but actually being thoughtful about what you’re comparing your character to and how it applies to your character and/or setting.

Wood

Pictured above: Mahogany, Walnut, Chestnut, Golden Oak, Ash

Wood can be an iffy description for skin tone. Not only due to several of them having “foody” terminology within their names, but again, associations.

Some people would prefer not to compare/be compared to wood at all, so get opinions, try it aloud, and make sure it’s appropriate to the character if you do use it.

“The old warlock’s skin was a deep shade of mahogany, his stare serious and firm as it held mine.”

Metals

Pictured above: Platinum, Copper, Brass, Gold, Bronze

Copper skin, brass-colored skin, golden skin…

I’ve even heard variations of these used before by comparison to an object of the same properties/coloring, such as penny for copper.

These also work well with modifiers.

“The dress of fine white silks popped against the deep bronze of her skin.”

Gemstones - Minerals

Pictured above: Onyx, Obsidian, Sard, Topaz, Carnelian, Smoky Quartz, Rutile, Pyrite, Citrine, Gypsum

These are trickier to use. As with some complex colors, the writer will have to get us to understand what most of these look like.

If you use these, or any more rare description, consider if it actually “fits” the book or scene.

Even if you’re able to get us to picture what “rutile” looks like, why are you using this description as opposed to something else? Have that answer for yourself.

“His skin reminded her of the topaz ring her father wore at his finger, a gleaming stone of brown, mellow facades.”

Physical Description

Physical character description can be more than skin tone.

Show us hair, eyes, noses, mouth, hands…body posture, body shape, skin texture… though not necessarily all of those nor at once.

Describing features also helps indicate race, especially if your character has some traits common within the race they are, such as afro hair to a Black character.

How comprehensive you decide to get is up to you. I wouldn’t overdo it and get specific to every mole and birthmark. Noting defining characteristics is good, though, like slightly spaced front teeth, curls that stay flopping in their face, hands freckled with sunspots…

General Tips

Indicate Race Early: I suggest indicators of race be made at the earliest convenience within the writing, with more hints threaded throughout here and there.

Get Creative On Your Own: Obviously, I couldn’t cover every proper color or comparison in which has been “approved” to use for your characters’ skin color, so it’s up to you to use discretion when seeking other ways and shades to describe skin tone.

Skin Color May Not Be Enough: Describing skin tone isn’t always enough to indicate someone’s ethnicity. As timeless cases with readers equating brown to “dark white” or something, more indicators of race may be needed.

Describe White characters and PoC Alike: You should describe the race and/or skin tone of your white characters just as you do your Characters of Color. If you don’t, you risk implying that White is the default human being and PoC are the “Other”).

PSA: Don’t use “Colored.” Based on some asks we’ve received using this word, I’d like to say that unless you or your character is a racist grandmama from the 1960s, do not call People of Color “colored” please.

Not Sure Where to Start? You really can’t go wrong using basic colors for your skin descriptions. It’s actually what many people prefer and works best for most writing. Personally, I tend to describe my characters using a combo of basic colors + modifiers, with mentions of undertones at times. I do like to veer into more creative descriptions on occasion.

Want some alternatives to “skin” or “skin color”? Try: Appearance, blend, blush, cast, coloring, complexion, flush, glow, hue, overtone, palette, pigmentation, rinse, shade, sheen, spectrum, tinge, tint, tone, undertone, value, wash.

Skin Tone Resources

List of Color Names

The Color Thesaurus

Skin Undertone & Color Matching

Tips and Words on Describing Skin

Photos: Undertones Described (Modifiers included)

Online Thesaurus (try colors, such as “red” & “brown”)

Don’t Call me Pastries: Creative Skin Tones w/ pics I

Writing & Description Guides

WWC Featured Description Posts

WWC Guide: Words to Describe Hair

Writing with Color: Description & Skin Color Tags

7 Offensive Mistakes Well-intentioned Writers Make

I tried to be as comprehensive as possible with this guide, but if you have a question regarding describing skin color that hasn’t been answered within part I or II of this guide, or have more questions after reading this post, feel free to ask!

~ Mod Colette

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