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I have to reblog for Stiddies

this was supposed to just be a lil shitpost sketch but you know i’m physically unable to leave things not fully rendered

anyway here’s bucky napping on the stiddies (steve’s tiddies) - another accidental collab with lovely @rillils 🩷

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I take this much perfection as a personal offence.

Bucky’s metal arm has touch sensors. They’ve just never been calibrated properly. The soldier learned only what was important to him on the field, the cold hard metal of a gun and how much pressure to use when pulling the trigger.

Steve notices this, as he helps Bucky settle in to his new life. He sees Bucky touching the soft flannel bedsheets first with his right hand, then with his left hand, brows knitted in deep concentration.

Uncertainly, Steve asks if he doesn’t like it, if it is too warm or too soft—

“Soft,” Bucky picks up the word from Steve’s ramble. He lowers his head and looks at the pastel sheets between his fingers, and repeats. “Soft.”

The cotton tee, the woollen cardigan, the denim pants, the mesh sneakers, he gently rubs each textile between his fingers with both hands. He does the same when in the kitchen, running his fingers lightly over the coarse heads of a cauliflower, the pockmarked rind of an orange, the sharp stalks of rosemary, the glossy skin of a plum.

His vocabulary recovers more with time, and whenever Steve asks how it feels, he can give a few extra words — firm, smooth, hard, sharp, rough. On the occasions he says the word soft, his whole expression relaxes and all the lines soften, and Steve wishes he could swathe the man with everything soft and fluffy just to keep it there.

They sit down to watch TV after dinner. lt’s their ritual. A time when they sit together silently — when Bucky gets used to being in the same physical space, without feeling the pressure to make conversation. It seems silly but Steve has seen the difference it has made, from Bucky wedging himself into the other end of the couch, to now relaxing next to him, their shoulders occasionally brushing as they reach for the crackers on the table.

This has been a particularly long day, Steve having just returned from a 3 day mission where he barely caught a wink. About ten minutes into the soothing documentary about red pandas, he is fast asleep. He wakes to something brushing against his hand, light and tremulous. Then something a little cooler and a lot harder does the same, and he realises what it is.

Bucky snatches his hands back when Steve opens his eyes. He says guiltily, “Sorry.”

Steve reaches out and rests his palm over Bucky’s metal fingers. “How does it feel?”

Bucky searches his face warily, and then he relaxes. Steve feels a light tickle as the small metal plates whir quietly under his hand.

“Soft,” Bucky answers. After a moment, he adds, “Warm.”

Steve threads his fingers through the metal ones, and holds the hand close. After a little while, he feels the metal fingers curl slowly until they rest, ever so gently, against the back of his hand.

“Tingly,” Bucky suddenly says, out of nowhere.

Steve smiles and answers, “Same.” He points to his chest, “Here.”

He can see the concern and confusion as Bucky glances a few times at his ribs.

One day, Bucky will understand what that means. Steve looks down at their linked fingers and runs his thumb along the metal plates, drawing a slight shiver from the man beside him.

This is a good start.

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Peter: I can't let Tony down! He's my father. er, mentor. He's my mentor.

Peter, muttering to himself: Mentor. Mentor, mentor, mentor

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aren’t we all glad that steve rogers didn’t become the hulk instead of captain america? that boy is always angry and ready for a fight even without the gamma rays

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Steve: I hope you have a plan for this mission.

Tony: Of course I do.

Steve: Okay, what is it?

Tony: …To come up with a plan.

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I read it as "I put spiders in his room while I was asleep." 😭

[Clint screaming]

Steve: What’s that?

Natasha, sipping her coffee casually: He stole my leftover pizza. I put spiders in his room while he was asleep.

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We'll never know.

Peter: Mr Stark, you look exhausted. When did you last sleep?

Tony: What day is it?

Peter: Monday

Tony: 6.

Peter: 6? 6 what?

Peter, watching Tony walk away: 6 WHAT?!

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Steve: Do you ever have the weird urge to kiss your friend? Like, not just a peck but…more?

Nat: No.

Clint: No.

Tony: No.

Bucky: All the time.

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What is "squeet'?

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Steve, after having a phone for less than a day: What’s Tumblr?

Peter, screeching: TURN IT OFF!

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Peter: Hey, dad?

Steve: …

Clint: …

Bucky: …

Tony: Is nobody else going to respond to him?

Clint: Why would any of us be “dad” to him? It’s obviously you.

Tony: Oh thank fuck, I thought I was being replaced.

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This is their whole relationship.

Clint, doing absolutely nothing: Hm…

Natasha: No. Absolutely not. Bad idea.

Clint: I didn’t even say anything yet!

Natasha: Don’t care. The answer is no.

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i choose to believe the avengers have a policy where their emergency contact can’t be another avenger or hero.

Leading to Steve having to uncomfortably ask Fury to be his, at the very start, because he didn’t have anyone else.

Tony decided (without asking) that JARVIS 1. isn’t an avenger 2. is a reasonable emergency contact

When Peter was asked for an emergency contact before Germany, he asked if they have to know he’s spider-man. A resounding Yes. He said Happy, because he didn’t really have anyone else who knew. Happy was not told about this until years later. (they wrote down Aunt May, with a note that they would simply have to inform her of the kids vigilantism)

A few years later, once Bucky was somewhat trusted enough to be considered a part of the team, an exception to the rule was made, so that Bucky and Steve could be each others contact. If they both went down, the call wouldn’t need to happen, anyways. There would be bigger issues.

Thor put down Loki. Protests that Loki would likely be the cause of the emergency fell in deaf ears.

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aren’t we all glad that steve rogers didn’t become the hulk instead of captain america? that boy is always angry and ready for a fight even without the gamma rays

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Natasha: I wasn’t that drunk last night at the party, right?

Bruce: You tried to colour my face with a highlighter because you said I was important

Natasha: But you are!

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Clint: If anyone ever tells you that you put too much parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them

Clint: You don't need that kind of negativity in your life

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Rhodey: All you guys talk about is top energy, bottom energy, big dick energy

Rhodey: Bitch, I've got no energy! I'm so tired!