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LJY: If quizzes are quizzical...

JRL: Lan Jingyi you stop that right now.

LJY: [smirking] Then what are tests?

LSZ: *sighs* Jingyi, please, it’s 3am

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LJY: *flops dramatically onto the floor* I require the blood of a thousand snowmen

WWX, without looking up: *hands him a glass of water*

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WWX: You rehearse your phone calls?

NHS: Who the fuck doesn’t?

JC: I don’t.

NHS: I always knew you were a psychopath.

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LJY: If I cut off my leg and swing it at your head, am I hitting you or kicking you?

LSZ: Jingyi, please, it’s 3 am.

OZZ: You’ll probably end up mentally scarring me more than anything.

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Juniors Group Chat - The Typical Conversation

LJY: killing must feel good to god, too. he does it all the time, and are we not created in god’s image?

OZZ: Can we talk about my day?

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NHS: If the Wens kill us all, I'm going to get Da-ge’s ghost to teach my ghost how to play the tuba just so that I can annoy the hell out of your ghost.

WWX: I'll just team up with Jiang Cheng's ghost to kick your ghost's ass.

JC: My ghost won't associate with your ghost.

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LJY: I want a cat snake.

WWX: [sighing, turning to Sizhui] Translate, please.

LSZ: Jingyi would like a ferret.

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Jiang Cheng: Threats are my preferred mode of communication. 

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WWX: Hey, Lan Zhan, let’s bang!

LWJ: what

WWX: Let’s hang. Sorry bro, autocorrect sucks

LWJ:

LWJ: This is a verbal conversation.

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A-Qing: Is four a lot?

XXC: Depends on the context. 

XY: For example, candies? No. Murders? Also no.

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[in a fight]

WWX: Don’t worry, kids, I’ve got special powers.

JRL: Can you sustain stab wounds?

WWX: Of course!

Juniors: [excited] Really?

WWX: Yeah, I just die afterwards.

Juniors:

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XXC: This guy has been bothering me—

XY: Kill him.

XXC: No.

XY:

XY: I kill him for you?

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WWX: Hey, kid, how do you pronounce your name? Is it Lan Jingyi like Jingyí? Or Jingyì?

LJY: it’s Lan Jingyi like I’m on your last nerve and I’m slicing through it with a vegetable peeler.

WWX:

LSZ: It’s Lan Jingyí.

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For a moment I thought you were referring to that Tom Holland drag lip-synch battle and I could really see NHS getting into it, flowing robes and everything

Chen Qing Avengers

STARRING:

Lan Wangji as Captain America

Wei Wuxian as Iron Man

and

Nie Huaisang as Spider-Man

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LJY: [peels paint off the wall]

LJY: Wow I love the skin of this house

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LXC: Wangji, why are you naked?

LWJ: I don’t have any clothes.

LXC: *opens closet* Yes you do, you have shirts, pants, oh, hello Wei-gongzi, how are you? Robes, and your coat!

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OZZ: Senior Wei, how do you tell someone you like them?

WWX: Ah, wonderful question, Zizhen. Just follow these seven steps:

Acquire several dozen limes.

Go up to your crush and then drop all the limes.

Start picking them up, but keep dropping them in the process. The clumsier you are, the better.

Keep doing this until you get their attention.

Finally gather up the limes. Try looking a bit sheepish here.

Look them in the eye, and say, “Sorry, I’m bad at Pickup Limes.”

Marry them.

JRL: *scoffs* And that works?

WWX: Well Lan Zhan married me, didn’t he?