incorrecthighrollersquotes - Tumblr blog

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Trellimar: Elora, keep a look out.

Elora: Wait, why me look out, why not you guys?

Trellimar: Because if someone comes up here, the Tiefling and the Drow get taken to jail. You get taken to dinner.

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"My motto is 'Never give a child a one syllable name'. Because life has taught me that people with a one syllable name are generally dim.

Jiǔtóu Zhìjī Jīng, while looking pointedly at Cam Buckland

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Cam Buckland: Let's all have sex.

Trellimar Aleath: And I thought the end of the world couldn't get any worse.

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Reynard Ferehorn: That was so cool, the way you leaned on that guy. He told you everything, I mean, you totally cracked him.

Durmont Vigil: Well, seeing as he was the victim, they're normally pretty talkative.

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Cam Buckland: Okay buddy, here it is! You hide my clothes, I wear everything you own!

Trellimar Aleath: Oh my god! That is so not the opposite of taking someone's underwear!

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Fishing relaxes me. It's like yoga, except I still get to kill something.

Jiǔtóu Zhìjī Jīng

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Jiǔtóu Zhìjī Jīng: I want to be your assistant.

Korak: Really? You hate it here.

Jiǔtóu: So do you. I'll make sure you don't have to go to any council meetings. And if any of them comes to see you I'll scare them off.

Cam Buckland: Wait, Jiǔtóu, if you had to choose between these two bandannas-

Jiǔtóu: *Slams the door in Cam's face

Korak: You're hired.

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Every year I give Elora the same gift I give everyone; a crisp twenty quid. And every year she gets me something thoughtful and personal. It makes me furious.

Trellimar Aleath

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Cassandra Wyndale: Who wants to hang out in a blanket fort with grown men in tiny underoos?

Cam Buckland: Hello!

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I'll show you the tool that's most important to our survival. But fair warning. It's my penis.

Cam Buckland

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Just give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Wait- wait. I worry that what you heard was 'give me a lot of bacon and eggs.' What I said was; Give me ALL. The bacon and eggs. You have. Do you understand?

Cam Buckland to any poor waitress in Talis’Val

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You think you're good looking. But you're not. You're average. You're just an average looking guy with a big dick.

Trellimar Aleath to Cam Buckland

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I don't know what to do, my whole brain is crying!

Reynard Ferehorn

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Jiǔtóu Zhìjī Jīng: Being funny is Mr Buckland's 'thing'. Like Mr Ferehorn's thing is...

Reynard Ferehorn: ... Hunting? Crossbows? Being a good brother?!

Jiǔtóu: *Thinking* No...

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I would do anything for my friends, which I think is how everyone in the world feels. Which is why I finally understand war.

Jiǔtóu Zhìjī Jīng