#Source: Friends

[dailywhouffle]

[you-askedforthis]

Peeta: Can I squeeze your ass? Katniss: On TV? Peeta:... Katniss: Yeah!

[incorrect-maraudersaandco-quotes]

Sirius: [Walks in and puts a human skull on the table where James and Peter are sitting] Peter: Uhhh... Pads? Sirius: What? Peter: The skull? Sirius: Oh yeah, that's my uncle's. James: [lurches back] OH MY GOD!!! Sirius: No, it's not his, it belonged to him. He'd put it out every Christmas to remind us that even though it's the holidays, people still die. Sirius: Plus, you can put candy in it! Regulus: *Enters* Hey guys... Aww, the Christmas candy skull! You remembered!

[batfamgalore]

Tim: All right, check out this bad boy.

*opens big new computer*

Tim: Twelve megabytes of RAM, 500 megabyte hard drive. Built in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 BPS.

Steph: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?

Tim: Games and stuff.

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Regulus , about James: He’s just so attractive…

Remus: Really? James?

Regulus: Really?? My brother???

Remus: …Touché.

[fabuloustrash05]

Angel Dust, about Husk: He’s just so attractive…

Cherri: Really? The bar tender?

Angel Dust: Really?? Sir Pentious???

Cherri: …Touché.

[daddiesdrarryy]

James: Okay, you guys, there’s Reg. Watch. Just watch this

Regulus: *walking past*

James: See? Still pretending he’s not interested. Oh! He’s coming over. Just pretend like we don’t know him. We’ve forgotten who he is!

Regulus: Hey guys!

Remus: Hey Regulus!

Peter: Hello!

James: …

Sirius: Hey, Reggie. You know Prongs, my best friend? He’s nice. He’s not bad to look at, right?

James: Thanks, Pads

Regulus: Well, of course

Sirius: Do you want to go out on a date with him? You got my blessing!

James: Sirius!

Regulus: Sure. Is Sunday okay?

Sirius: Sunday’s perfect. He can’t wait

Regulus: On the date, I will be able to talk to him directly, right?

Sirius: Yeah

Regulus: All right, see you Sunday, Potter *leaves*

James: Okay. What the hell was that? You know what? Don’t answer me

James, giggling: I have a date with Reggie!

[incorrectbuddie118]

Buck: Good morning, lover.

Eddie: I've got to say after last night, I'm feeling a little weak in the knees.

Christopher, closing the fridge door: Here's an idea: When you walk into a room... Take a quick scan.

(x)

[fourdollarwords]

Made for Chapter 34 of @morningstarwrites' wonderful fic Of Saints and Sinners. Rosie and Husk both having found out about radioapple dating but being sworn to secrecy immediately made me think of his scene in Friends.

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Y/N, internally: Everything’s going to be fine. It’s just a crush.

Wanda: Hey, Y/N.

Y/N: I love you.

[chronic-hyperfixator]

Charles: Edwin, apologize to them.

Edwin: Fine, but I have to warn you, this might make me a better person and that is not the man you fell in love with.

[romanoffshouse]

Y/N: Date of birth?

Natasha: December 3rd, 1984.

Y/N: Age?

Natasha: Can't you figure that out based on my date of birth?

Y/N: ....I'm a superhero, Natasha, not a mathematician.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Nina: mmmm this cake is amazing

Wylan: oh my god, get a room

Nina: I would get a room with this cake. I think I could show this cake a good time

Jesper: If you had to what would you give up, food or sex?

Nina, immediately: Sex

Matthias: Seriously, answer faster

Nina: Oh I’m sorry, honey, when he said sex I wasn’t thinking about sex with you

Matthias: … It’s like giant hug

Wylan: Jes what about you, which would you give up: sex or food?

Jesper: Food

Wylan: Okay, how about sex or your guns?

Jesper: *look of pure horror*

Jesper: Oh my god, it’s like Sophie’s Choice

[incorrect-maraudersaandco-quotes]

James: Reg, apologise to them Regulus: Fine, but I have to warn you, this might make me a better person and that is not a man you felt in love with

[shyjusticewarrior]

Dick: I was really confused, and then I talked to these guys.

Barbara: Who, zero long-term relationships and Tim?

Jason: Hey!

Tim: She's right, you know.

Jason: Yeah, but still. Cheap shot.

Tim: *nods*

[incorrectuntamedmodaozushiquotes]

[Lecture Days] Lan Xichen, about Wei Wuxian: Why don’t you go talk to him? Lan Wangji, sarcastically: Oh. Yeah, sure. Lan Xichen: What? So you go tell him he’s cute, what’s the worst that could happen? Lan Wangji: He could hear me.