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insannywestan · 4 years

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“Swallowing Courage” (Danny Wagner x Sam Kiszka ) CHAPTER TWO - I PROMISE THIS CHAPTER GOT DELETED SO I’M JUST REPOSTING IT (: CHAPTER 3 coming soon. - A loud knock at the door was the first thing Danny heard when he woke up the next morning. He slowly shifted around in the bed and felt the weight of another body close to his back. “So it was just a dream??” Danny thought to himself. He looked over at Sam and his back was completely turned away from him. Sam’s arms were close to his chest and his knees were closer to his stomach. Danny took this as, “Oh he didn’t want his legs or arms to touch me the whole night, so it must have been just a dream.” Danny sighed in relief. There was no way it could have actually happened, why would Sam ever offer to help Danny explore his sexuality? There is no way Sam would ever take a risk that could potentially ruin their lifelong friendship. There was another knock at Sam’s door, when there was no answer again the door swung open. Josh was standing there in the doorway holding a tall cup of coffee. “Can I have some of that? Please?” Danny asked sitting up in Sam’s bed. “Uh-hmm. What are you doing today? Just church or what?” Josh hummed, he passed his cup of coffee to Danny and climbed into the bed to sit down next to him. “Wait, it’s Sunday?! How did I forget! What time is it?” Danny raised his voice and this finally woke Sam up. “It’s 8:35 right now.” Josh said reaching his hand out and taking back his cup of coffee. “Ugh, I have to go. Like right now.” Danny had to quickly crawl over Sam’s legs and Josh’s body to get himself out of the bed. “Dude stop it!” Josh said slowly moving his arms up. “What??” Danny asked, once he looked back at him he could see a few drops of coffee running down Josh’s arm. His quick movements almost made Josh spill the coffee on himself, but he caught it quickly before it could make a real mess. “Yeah, seriously. Calm down. Church doesn’t start until like 10:00? Right?” Sam asked running his hands through his messy hair. “Yeah, but I have to be there at 9:00 every time to help set up!” Danny said grabbing his jean jacket and his boots he was wearing yesterday. Danny often played the drums in the worship band at his church on Wednesdays and Sundays, sometimes he would also sing when he needed to. He always went to church twice a week and was never late to any form of service. At Danny’s church he is one of the top volunteers and is a highly respected student leader in his youth group. He has been very involved in church since his childhood, it has always been a huge part of his life. “My mom and dad are gonna kill me. I don’t know if I’m gonna make it on time.” Danny heavily sighed quickly lacing up his boots.

“OH SHIT! That’s right. Speaking of mom and dad, we got to clean up this house before they get here.” Josh set his cup of coffee down and jumped up to run downstairs to the living room. The Kiszka parents and Ronnie had gone to a relative’s house last night because they wanted the boys to have the house to themselves for Danny’s birthday. “You do realize how fast I can drive right? I can get you there in twenty minutes tops.” Sam said standing and throwing on a hoodie. “Really you will??? Thank you Sam.” Danny sighed in relief this time, he knew if he drove himself then he would just end up following all the rules and would never speed past the posted limit. Sam followed most of the rules of the road, but he would still speed around left and right if he saw there were no cops around. Danny and Sam jogged down the stairs and saw Jake taking down some of the decorations. Josh grabbed the empty bottles and handed them to Sam. “Here you, smash these bottles outside on the concrete. Then sweep it up and throw all the glass at the bottom of the trash. Jake will cover it up by throwing the decorations and other trash on top of it. The glass won’t rip the trash bag, we double bagged it.” Josh always was the one who came up with ideas on how to cover up the evidence so their parents wouldn’t find out what they were up too. “Ah, I got to take Danny to church like right now.” Sam said grabbing the keys to the car that the twins shared. “Hurry up then! Come back right after you are done.” Jake shot him a glare while continuing to pick up trash. "I promise!!” Sam shouted as he ran out of the door with Danny.

` About fifteen minutes later they had arrived. Sam dramatically swerved into the church parking lot and parked right up front where everyone could see them through the untinted car windows. “You didn’t have to pull in all crazy like that.” Danny said slowly taking off his seatbelt. “You wanted to be on time. Right?” Sam scoffed. “That is true.” Danny smiled despite feeling slightly embarrassed because of the few old people frowning in their direction. The older people always showed up earlier and the younger people with families show up right on time. “Thank you for driving me over here, I really appreciate it. Do you want to ditch the twins and come to church with me?” Danny asked. "No problem, and you know what I say every time you invite me to church Daniel. No. Oh, and by the way, take it easy in there when you drum today. Last night I noticed you need to take better care of your hands’ dude. You’re going to ruin them before you have a shot at becoming a successful drummer.” Sam said looking down at Danny’s blistered hands that were sitting in his lap. He never ”took it easy” because he had no other coping mechanisms except drumming. “Oh.” Danny said. He thought it was weird that Sam randomly started talking about his hands, especially since he had a dream last about them holding hands. Then suddenly Danny felt a tidal wave of anxiety fire through his brain, travel down his spine, and then into his lower body. Why would he start talking about his hands? Unless it really happened. “So, what do you want to try later?” Sam asked curiously. “What do you mean?” Danny asked calmly. “You know, like what do you want to do next? With me?” Sam asked, directly looking into Danny’s eyes. ”Oh wow.” Danny took a deep breath. INHALE. IGNORE EXHALE CONTINUE. His thoughts were shouting at him to calm down, but he still could not stop his body from panicking. Danny’s hand began to tremble. He could not believe this was happening to him. Danny was filled with instant regret, guilt, and shame. He wanted to run away and never look at Sam again. He wished he could take back holding Sam’s hand. At the same time, he couldn’t deny how good it felt to hold hands with a guy, with Sam for the first time. ”Can we talk about this after church?” Danny looked over at Sam, hoping that he would agree. He didn’t even want to go to church anymore, he merely wanted to be alone. ”What’s wrong with you?” Sam asked. ”You’re shaking right now.” ”I’m just cold. And I don’t feel good. At. All.” Danny said trying his best to stop shaking. He was thankful that it was December so he could use the weather as an excuse. ”Oh, It’s because you need a hoodie underneath that jean jacket. I got another one in the back, no worries.” Sam said unbuckling his seatbelt and getting out of the car. Sam remembered that he held Danny’s hand that night. He was not that drunk by that hour. Danny was absolutely panicking over it, but Sam appeared to be unfazed by what happened the night before. ”Want me to go to church with you?” Sam asked once he came back from the trunk with an extra hoodie. Danny could not believe his ears. He considered the thought maybe last night when he blew out the candles it had transported him into some parallel universe. Sam was not freaked out at all. Sam wanted to be there for Danny while he could see that he was clearly panicking and wasn’t actually cold. He already had Danny figured out, Sam has been there for many panic attacks before this one, and he never left him alone during one. Sam was willing to sacrifice his morning and afternoon to make sure Danny was okay.

”You don’t have too. Jake and Josh will get mad at you later if you don’t go back home now.” Danny replied as he took off his jean jacket to put on Sam’s hoodie, then layered it by putting his own jacket back on as Sam told him to do. ”I want to.” Sam said.” Besides they will get over it if they get mad oh well.” ”Really, thank you.” Danny said looking at Sam with this newfound admiration. ”Of course, like I said yesterday, I would do anything for you.” Sam shrugged. ”Oh and if you want to after church we can hang out and talk about whatever you want.” Danny looked up stared at Sam for a long time. There was so much he wanted to say to him, but he did not know where to start. There were no words to describe how grateful he was to have Sam as his best friend. Danny wanted to give him Sam a really long hug, but he couldn’t bring himself to actually do it.

”Okay that sounds good.” Danny smiled. He didn’t hug him, but they finally got out of the car and walked into the church together.

After the service, they decided to walk down a trail behind Danny’s house. This was the usual spot where they went to rant or talk about people at school, their families, or whatever was going on in their life.

”So. When did you start liking guys?” Sam asked kicking a rock in front of him. There was a brief moment of silence. Danny was unsure how to answer the question. His mind had deeply suppressed the idea of liking guys a long time ago. In the past, whenever he began to feel a certain way about a guy, Danny would always tell himself that it was wrong to think that way.

”I don’t think I like guys. I just know I have these thoughts that I can’t control. So I’m thinking maybe if I act on them, they might go away once I see how weird it is to actually ”get with” a guy in real life.” Danny answered. ”Oh. I don’t think that’s how it works.” Sam said. He stopped kicking he rock and looked up at Danny. ”But if that’s you think then, okay. I’ll still help you out, but what are you gonna do if you actually realize you like guys?” Danny did not want to consider the possibility that he was really gay or anything else besides straight. It was too much for him to handle. If he thought about it long enough, his brain might explode from the mind-blowing possibility that it could be true. ”I’m not gay.” Danny sighed. ”I just need a wake-up call, and you are gonna be it for me. I just need to do this, so I feel more sure of myself, so I can move on with my life. You can back out now if you want too. I know you already do a lot for me, so you don’t have to help me do this too. I can find some other guy to make out with and then I can get it over with.” Danny silently hoped that Sam was going to back out of it because maybe that would make things easier. If he kissed a guy that was a stranger it might be easier, because then he would not have to think about ruining a friendship.

At first, Sam just stared at Danny, then he looked over at a large rock off to the side of the trail. He walked off the trail and sat down on the rock. Sam leaned back a little and made himself comfortable. “Come here, Danny.” “Why?” Danny gulped starting to feel the nerves coming back. “Just come here. I have something to tell you.” Sam said. He hesitated, but he still slowly walked over to the rock to sit by Sam. “What is it?” Danny asked scooting closer to his friend. “Yesterday I wanted to tell you this, but I was pretty sure Josh and Jake were going to make fun of me and I didn’t want to hear it. I also thought you might make fun of me for even giving you the ring, so I just didn’t say anything extra to add on to it. Anyways, last night when I gave you that ring it was not just a symbol of our friendship, it was also a promise from me. It was a promise to be your best friend no matter what happens. I can say a whole list of things, but I promise to always be there. I promise to always hear you out. I promise to never judge you. I swear, I do.”

Danny was truly speechless now. “Can I hug you?” He asked. Sam and Danny did not hug very often. They felt like there was no need to hug unless they took a break from seeing each other for a while. Sometimes when Danny had panic attacks then they would hug during or after it happened. ”Yeah.” Sam said, he moved as close as he could to Danny and put his arms around his neck. Danny slid his arms around Sam’s waist and pulled him closer to his chest, practically pulling him into his lap. He began to tighten his grip, digging his fingers into Sam’s rib cage. Danny took a deep breath and let out a sigh. Sam tried to pull away from him, but Danny held him there and didn’t let him move.

”Can we hug longer?” Danny asked when Sam tried to move away again. ”Yeah. If you stop crushing me.” Sam winced. Danny looked down and realized how much pressure he was using in this hug ”Oh I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you!” Danny gasped starting to move away from Sam. ”It’s okay. Come back.” Sam said grabbing Danny’s shirt and pulling him in closer to his face. Now they were nose to nose, making direct eye contact. Sam took a deep breath and he placed one hand on Danny’s face. Danny thought that maybe he should back up and move away, but that never happened. There was no way could blink or look away either, Sam had never been this close to his face before. Sam leaned in and Danny had no time to mentally prepare for what happened next. Sam gave him the most gentle kiss on one side of his cheek. He was positive that it was going to end there, but it didn’t. Sam leaned in more and put both his hands on Danny’s face, then he kissed the other side of his cheek. His lips moved up to the middle of Danny’s forehead then he kissed down the bridge of his nose. Sam paused once he reached Danny’s mouth. Tilting his head, he hovered over Danny’s lips, once he moved a little closer it made their lips lightly touch for a moment. Danny was tingling all over. ”Wait.” Danny said putting his hand on Sam’s chest. ”What?” Sam asked impatiently. ”Promise we will still be friends after this?” ”I promise.” Sam said quickly moving one hand to the back of Danny’s head. Once he moved his head forward, Sam finally got the chance to put his lips on Danny’s mouth. Sam let their closed lips stay pressed together for a moment, but not for too long. Then he grabbed Danny’s hair and tugged it just enough to make him gasp. Sam’s plan to deepen the kiss had worked, he pulled on his hair more, and now Danny’s jaw was slightly opened. That gave Sam the chance to lean forward and to slowly work his tongue into Danny’s mouth. Sam could tell that Danny was hesitant about this next move. Every time Danny would try to back up, Sam would pull him in closer. Eventually, Danny stopped trying to fight it, he put his hands on Sam’s back and started to move them up and down Sam’s spine. After he did this he could feel a shift and then more pressure on his lips. ”Mmm.” Sam lightly moaned into his mouth and started using more tongue. Danny’s hands were sending chills down his spine. Once Sam made that sound and Danny felt himself getting more heated by the second. Sam kept both of his hands underneath Danny’s hair so he could protect his head from hitting the rock when he rolled them over. Now they were laying on top of this uncomfortable rock kissing back and forth. Sam was on top of him with one knee on both sides of his waist, he tried his best to not to let their lips disconnect for more than a few seconds. Danny’s desire to keep kissing Sam only grew stronger, even though he could feel all of the uneven ridges of the rock digging into his back. Then suddenly Sam stopped kissing him. He abruptly pulled away and looked at Danny with a wide smile. “So. How was that kiss?” ”I uh, did not think it would feel like that. Better than I thought I guess? Also, that was way more than one kiss.” Danny said breathing heavily. ”Yeah and all those kisses are not for free.” Sam said sitting up and moving off of Danny’s body. Then he climbed off the rock and looked back up at Danny a smile. ”Oh okay, what do you want?” Danny asked. ”Let see. I. Want.” Sam began to cross his arms and look to the side. Danny waited in anticipation as Sam took his sweet time thinking about what he wanted.

”Weed, alcohol, my favorite snacks, and a few new records.” Sam requested. ”Oh okay.” Danny blushed. He thought that Sam was gonna say something sexual, but he wrong. ”Do you think you like guys now or what?” ”I don’t know, maybe you should come over later?” ”Danny!! Dude. You just can’t get enough of me huh!?” Sam teased. ”Shut up Sam.” Danny said feeling the sudden urge to cover his face with his hands. ”But will you? Come over later?”

”You know I will.”

- END OF CHAPTER 2. There is gonna be a lot more writing coming up later, so be prepared.

#T H I S S S S S SSSJFLSJAHSPAJWGWO #THIS STORY IS SO GOOD #if you want some fucking sanny content... it is HERE #say thank you to rose for her amazing creativity and bravery publishing it if yoy read this please!#ita so awesime #fanfic #kissing #fluff #sanny #in sanmy we stan

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insannywestan · 4 years

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YOOOO AMAZING NEW CONTENT!!!

“ Swallowing Courage “

( DANNY WAGNER X SAM KISZKA)

CHAPTER ONE - THE BIRTHDAY BOY Authors Note: This first chapter is dedicated to @imacrowcawcaw because they are just amazing 🥁🤍. Sam and Danny are in their senior year of high school in this story, and well, you’ll see where it goes.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR DANNY.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOOUU.”

The three Kiszka boys sang loudly for their best friend, but Josh’s voice overpowered his siblings of course.

“Thank you guys.” Danny smiled, he paused and closed his eyes for a moment then blew out the candles. The cake was red velvet with white frosting. In the middle there was a drum kit drawn on with red and gold frosting, the edges of the cake were outlined with little hand drawn music notes.

The three boys clapped and cheered, then Jake and Josh went into the kitchen to get plates and forks.

“Wow dude. You didn’t wash the dishes?” Jake sighed once they reached the sink.

”Hey you were supposed to do them today, not me.” Josh shrugged his shoulders and grabbed the sponge next to the soap.

”Yeah, but I went to pick up the decorations. You should have known to do them before we started Danny’s party.” Jake complained as he put away the clean dishes to make room for the newly washed ones.

The twins continued arguing, and Sam reached over the table to grab the bottle of Jack Daniels. He already had a multiple shots before this but felt like he could handle more.

”If you both hurry up THEN we can have clean plates to eat this cake on. Right??” Sam shouted towards the kitchen, then after a few seconds he heard the water running and his brother’s voices softening.

Sam laughed and turned his head back towards Danny.

”Soo, what did you wish for Daniel?” Sam said before chasing his shot with cup of Pepsi.

”Ha. Not telling you.” Danny said.

”What! Just say it. I know you believe in a lot of superstitious shit or whatever, but come on telling me won’t ruin your wish.”

“Uh, yeah it will. The whole point is to keep it to yourself, so I’m not telling you.”

”Please? For me?” Sam laughed and tilted his head slightly to the left, then smiled with his teeth.

Usually his friend smiled with his lips closed, so when Sam randomly decided to smile with his teeth Danny was caught off guard. Whenever Sam directly smiled at Danny, for any reason, it always made him feel way too warm on the inside. This was odd to him, because it would come out of nowhere without warning. Most of the time when this warm feeling happened he would take a deep inhale, ignored the feeling, exhale, and then continue on with his conversation.

Inhale

Ignore

Exhale

Continue . . .

“I don't know, maybe I'll tell you later. If I feel like it." Danny sighed while looking down at his cake. He already knew that he was not going to have the balls to tell Sam his wish, or the hidden meaning behind the wish. Even if Danny did tell him, he knew that Sam could never fully understand it. Danny felt more alone than ever, even on a day like this where his friends are doing nothing but celebrating his life.

"Why do you sound sad??" Sam asked sounding confused yet concerned.

"I'm not sad." Danny denied. "You guys actually made me really happy today."

"Yeah, you did look happy today, but right now you sound like you're sad. Did something happen or what?" Sam asked throwing his arm around the back of Danny’s chair.

"Trust me, I'm fine." Danny answered, growing more annoyed with his questions.

"You obviously aren't, so you might as well tell me what's wrong. I mean ya already tell me everything else." Sam insisted.

"Stop pushing me to tell you. Can you just move on from it?"

After Danny said that, Sam made a dramatic gasp and moved his chair closer to his friend. "Ouch, the birthday boy is a grouchy boy today."

"Why don't you back off and just drop it?" Danny snapped at Sam without even thinking about it. The teasing started to make him feel frustrated. Danny also felt like his friend was leaning in way too close to his face, and he desparetely needed him to back off before that warm feeling came to attack him again.

The combination of the many shots and Danny's attitude got Sam super pissed off. He worked all day to make sure this party was perfect for his best friend, so he felt that Danny had no right speaking to him like this after all that work he did.

"Fine. I’ll back off, I guess. You know, just because it's your birthday does not mean you have the right to be an asshole to me." Sam said standing up, still holding a shot of fireball that he never took. "I fucking spent foreverrrr decorating the house and making this cake FOR YOU. D-Didn’t even let Jake or Josh help me bake, because I wanted to say I made it for YOU. On top of that, I got you a nice gift too. Dick."

After his rant was over, Sam turned his back and starting stumbling out of the dining room and into the living room. He forgot he was holding the shot and started spilling it on the floor on the way to the couch.

"What's are you guys fighting about??” Jake shouted over sounds of running water and dishes stacking together.

"Uh, it’s nothing! Wait, let me help you, okay? I'm sorry." Danny said standing up and quickly moving behind Sam, in case he fell or tripped over something.

Sam immediately stopped moving and started staring into the space in front of him. He put his hand on his chest and his other hand the wall next to him.

”Oh shit.” He said moving the hand from his chest to cover his mouth.

After seeing that, Danny ran to open the sliding door and Sam ran up behind him. He quickly moved out of the way and gently held Sam’s hair back so he could lean over throw up outside the house.

“Ahh gross, we were all just about to eat the cake.” Josh said coming back with clean dishes.

”Shit. Are you okay?” Jake asked following behind Josh.

“Mmm. Hmm. Yup. Ugh I’m okay.” Sam said wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “I’m sorry Danny. I didn’t mean to get this drunk tonight, but I feel way way better now.”

Danny let go of his hair and smiled in relief, because he knew that Sam was not mad at him anymore. Even when they weren’t drinking, they usually forgave each other pretty easily.

”It’s okay Sam, I’m sorry too. Let’s go eat the cake you made me.”

After eating they all began to feel full and tired, but the twin’s enthusiasm had not died down yet. For the twins the drinking had just begun. Sam wasn’t used to drinking and he was already sick, so he decided to stick with water for the rest of the night. Danny was beginning to feel a little bit buzzed, but he was too much of a control freak to let himself become fully drunk.

“Okay, Okay later. Another shot??” Jake offered reaching for the fireball.

”Oh no- no I’m cool, I’m alright. Sort of already starting to get drunk.” Danny insisted.

“You’re only 18 once!” Josh said coming back from the kitchen with plates and forks.

”Yeah.” Jake said following behind his twin. “You can’t turn in for the night yet.”

“No no, I don’t want to get wasted, I want to be able to remember this! Seriously, you guys didn’t have to do all of this.” Danny said looking down at his homemade cake and then he lifted his head up, glancing at the elaborate gold and black metallic decorations around the room.

“All this?? You didn’t open your gifts yet.” Sam jumped up and went to get his gift for Danny that was in his bedroom. He was far more collected and sober now after eating and drinking tons of water.

”Oh yeahh. Duh. Here you go. Happy birthday to our best fuckin’ friend on this whole planet!!” Jake slurred and handed over gift.

Jake got him these super nice over the ear headphones that he has been wanting for awhile. “YESS! Thank you Jake.”

Josh bought him a few colorful outfits that he thought would suit his friend.

“Wow I love the pattern on this shirt. I bet you wanted to keep it for yourself huh??” Danny laughed and gently kicking Josh’s foot under the table. Josh kicked his foot back harder in response. “You know I did! But I really wanted you to have it.” He grinned widely.

Danny looked over at Sam, and quickly that his friend was already staring at him beforehand. Sam smiled once they made eye contact and handed him a small green cube with a ribbon on the top of it.

”Happy birthday Danny. I’m not gonna drag this out, so I don’t sound too much like a crybaby. I just want to say that you have been my best friend forever, and you always will be. I hope everytime you see this gift you remember that.”

“Awe, thank you.” The warm feeling came back again after Sam said that, but once he opened the box it just hit him like an oncoming semi truck. It was a fucking ring. A black ceramic ring. Danny did not waste any time before he put in on his finger.

”I have the same one.” Sam said, and now Danny felt like he was going to throw up in his mouth out of nervousness. It made him excited, but also confused.

”What? Uh, Why?” Danny asked trying to make himself sound more curious than afraid.

“That’s how best friend jewlery works, stupid.” Sam laughed and shoved his shoulder. “I don’t like to wear rings though, so mine is on a necklace.” He reached down his shirt and pulled out a chain with the same black ring hanging on it.

”Thank you.” Danny said quietly. “Well?? Do you like it??” Sam asked eagerly.

”I love it.” He back answered with no hesitation.

It was 3:00 AM now, Jake fell asleep first.

”Get up.” Josh said shaking his brother’s shoulder.

”What?? Why??” Jake mumbled.

”You have to go to your own room, so Danny can sleep on the couch.” Josh said shaking him harder.

”He can sleep in your room. Or Sam’s room.” Jake mumbled again not moving an inch.

“Okay Danny. My room or Sam’s room?” Josh asked. Danny sighed. “Umm.”

He could pick Josh’s room and have no anxiety and no weird warm feeling. Or he could pick Sam’s room where there is a huge risk of feeling uncomfortable and overheated real quick.

“My room is bigger.” Sam said casually, before Danny had the chance to make a proper decision.

“Yeah you’re right. Well goodnight guys.” Josh said making his way to his own room.

Danny immediately crawled into Sam’s bed and pulled the covers over his face. Trying his best to start feeling tired and not feel so jittery and alert.

”Do you think you’re going to sleep without telling me your wish??” Sam asked sitting down on the outside of the blankets.

”I was hoping you would forget about it.”

”No I didn’t, so tell me it. Why did it make you get all cranky and defensive earlier?”

”It’s a really stupid wish.”

“I bet it’s not.” Sam was not backing down, so Danny just thought, well fuck it, he obviously wants to know.

”It was to um, have courage.” Danny said quietly.

“Wow, that is a stupid wish.” Sam said back immediately.

”Why do you think so?”

”Because you already have courage Danny.” Sam sighed.

“No I don’t, trust me.”

”Okay then, courage to do what??”

”Toexperimentwithaguyifiwantedtoo.” Danny spilled out without taking a pause between words. “What?? Say it slower than that!” Sam laughed.

”To experiment with. A guy. If I wanted too.” Danny said again but much slower.

“Holy shit.” Sam said with wide eyes that made Danny so much more nervous. “Well, you obviously want to, or else you wouldn’t have wished for the courage to do it.”

That made Danny really think again about his wish, he hated that Sam was right. He couldn’t help the frown that appeared on his face and the tears starting to form in his eyes.

“I’m just so lost right now.”

This made Sam’s heart hurt. He couldn’t believe how emotional Danny was getting over this, this has obviously been taking a toll on him and Sam had no idea this was going on inside his head. He carefully thought about his words before choosing to speak again.

”You know I would do anything for you? Like anything. ” Sam said putting his hand on Danny’s shoulder.

”Yeah I know that you would.” He sighed.

”Okay then, where do you want to start?” Sam asked standing up so he could pull the covers back.

”What!?” Danny almost choked on his own spit. He grabbed the covers and pulled them back towards his body to cover himself. He knew that Sam was openly bisexual, but he never thought Sam would ever think about touching him in a way that wasn’t platonic.

”Don’t make it more weird. Just tell me what you want to do, then we can do that, and move on from it okay? We wouldn’t have to talk about it again if you didn’t want to. Deal??” Sam asked putting a reassuring hand on Danny’s back. That made Danny feel a whole lot better, Sam was not pressuring him to do anything he didn’t want to do, and plus he was right. He trusted that they could just move on and not have to talk about it again, because they were close like that.

”Okay deal.” Danny managed to say after an long pause.

“So what do you want to do first? Kiss or what?” Sam asked casually, the tone of his voice showed that this was not a big deal for him at all.

”I feel like that’s moving too quick.” Danny said shuffling his hands together.

“Too quick??” Sam laughed loudly. “What then? Do you want to cuddle or hold hands first?” He was completely joking, but Danny took him seriously. “Even cuddling sounds like too much for us to start with. I’ve never held hands with a guys before, so um can we just, uh, hold hands for the rest of the night??” Danny asked knowing his face was burning and turning red.

“Alright then Daniel, that’s easy.” Sam said he stood up to turn off the lights and then finally started getting into the blankets. He reached over Danny waist, which almost made him jump, then he felt around and found Danny’s hand. At first Sam lightly placed his hand on top of his, then he squeezed his hand tightly, and that felt really good for Danny. The more pressure he used the less nervous he felt. Danny tried to go to sleep, but it was hard with Sam so close to him.

“Sam??”

”Yeah??”

”Thank you.” Danny whispered.

”You’re welcome.” Sam whispered back. He started playing around with Danny rough hands. He slowly traced his fingers over the ring that he gave Danny. Eventually he interlaced their hands together.

Danny felt warm all over, except this time he did not feel like running away from it. Danny squeezed Sam’s hand and sighed deeply closing his eyes. Danny was astonished by how comfortable he felt. He didn’t need to do whole “Inhale, Ignore, Exhale” exercise that he normally needed to do around Sam.

He actually wanted to be in this moment, and not ignore or escape it for one minute.

THAT’S THE END OF CH.1

Tell me if you love it or hate it. Roast me or praise me. I’ll accept either TBH. Also I’ve never wrote a full length fanfic before so... peace out ✌🏼

#im freaking out over this #my friend! my new friend who ships and writes sanny! i love you!!!#this is so damn cute and just UGHH #i picture it so well #fanfic #fluff #sannyyyy #in sanny we stan #sanny

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