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Hogwarts circa 1975 had one hell of a love dodecahedron going on, let’s see…

Evan is in love with Barty, who was in love with Regulus, who is pining in secret for James, whose pining very loudly for Lily (Pandora and, sigh, Snape are also doing it, just a lot quieter), who in turn is crushing hard on Mary, who is both crushing on Marlene (who is in a heated enemies to lovers arc with Dorcas), and also casually dating Sirius, who is having a sexuality crisis and is having a very complicated will-they-or-won’t-they going on with Remus, who had a summer fling with Grant but is right now just very in love with Sirius and but will not admit it.

The students might not be having a good time, but the teachers were having a GREAT time with the amount of beats they were taking on who would end up with who (McGonagall is all beats off on Jily and WolfStar, Dumbledore officially doesn’t join but he has a soft spot for Jegulus because y’know, Grindledore, and somehow Flitwick ends up winning the most amount of galleons and no one is quite sure how he did it)

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Reblog if you're a slut for Regulus calling James Jamie

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reg would 100% try to break up with james cause like commitment issues and james wouldn’t even falter he’d just say like “thank you for the idea but im good im heading out to get some coffee you want your regular?”

No because this is exactly what I was thinking????? Regulus being self deprecating, a little shit. Adamant that James deserves better and he has to end it right now. And he's not even subtle about it, man's just full panicking. James knows it's coming.

"I'm breaking up with you"

"Nah, I'm alright. Don't really fancy breaking up today, I have too much going on. Did I tell you what happened to me last night? Oh my god, listen to this."

And he babbles on so much that Regulus completely forgets how the conversation started in the first place. But he's even more in love with James than before so it doesn't matter anyway.

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Sirius: aww look reggie is snogging someone! must be his boyfriend

Remus: shit

Sirius: what? what’s wrong?

Regulus: *pulls back so James is visible to everyone*

Sirius:

Sirius: is that James?

Remus:

Remus: would it help if I said no?

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*before Jegulus was a thing*

James: Regulus, darling-

Regulus: Listen Potter, I don't know if I want to tell you to fuck off, be friends with you, curse you, kill you, or kiss you

James: Can I pick which one?

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sirius “you know where to find me” black and james “and i know where to look” potter.

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Am I tripping or did the Tumblr font change on mobile?

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James at 3 am telling Remus about how much he loves Regulus: I mean like mate he could hit me with a bulger and I would thank him

Remus who just wants to go to sleep: yeah so would I

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remus lupin’s favorite things 

his whiskey neat 

coffee

black, in his bed at 3

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A random Slytherin guy: Hey handsome. Am I your type?

James: No

Slytherin: What's your type?

James: I have a boyfriend

Slytherin: So what's your type then

James: My boyfriend.

Slytherin: What does he look like?

James: He looks like my boyfriend.

Slytherin: What would you rate me out of ten?

James: I can't do that.

Slytherin: Can't rate me at all?

James: Can't rate you at all.

Slytherin: What would you rate your boyfriend out of ten?

James: He broke my scale because he's so gorgeous.

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Does anyone know that Reddit story that’s like “i thought I was straight but my roommate keeps kissing my forehead when he thinks I’m asleep and I want him to do it when I’m awake too” and then one time when the roommate does it he mumbles “one more please” and then when he wakes up from his nap the roommate is grinning ear to ear and they talk and start dating. The urge to write that. James naturally very affectionate, in love w reg and just cannot fight the urge to kiss his forehead every time he sees him taking a nap on the couch, sleep painting him all soft and angelic. And so reg just starts pretending to sleep all the time so James will kiss him. And when he gets caught it is so humiliating for him like he never shows his emotions let alone THIS meanwhile James is just fucking giddy, ecstatic, breaking out into the biggest grin every time he thinks of reg’s little “one more please,” so endeared. ok actually I have write this goodbye

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James: there’s no such thing as mistakes, just happy accidents

Regulus: will it be a happy accident when i punch you in the face

James:

James: yes…

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Sirius: come on reggie im just trying to help you find a girlfriend

Regulus: i don’t need your help

Sirius: come on reggie!!

Regulus: i’m gay sirius!

Sirius:

Sirius: okay well we can just get you a boyfriend

Regulus: i’m not interested

Sirius: i know a few boys who would interest you

Regulus: bloody hell!

Regulus: *leans over to kiss james*

Regulus: i’m perfectly fine

Sirius:

James:

Sirius: are you fucking kidding me?!

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Dorcas: I’m passing the phone to someone who’s addicted to dragon soup.

Marlene: I’m passing the phone to a ginger.

Lily:

Lily: I am passing the phone to someone who’s mean to everyone.

Regulus: first of all, that was a lie, second of all, I’m passing the phone to the person with the hugest glasses you have ever seen in your whole life ever.

James: I’m passing the phone to someone who’s really annoying in the morning because they have so much energy.

Mary: hello! I am passing the phone to the biggest undercover party animal!!

Remus: ...I am passing the phone to the person who’s mostly to go home early from a party because it’s past his bedtime.

Sirius:

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James (whispering): Maybe they didn’t see us-

Firenze (standing with a pack of angry centaurs): Come out and face us wizards! For your transgressions, a battle to the death will be fit!

Remus (hissing): I told you idiots that trying to ride a centaur was a stupid idea. Sirius, go fight them!

Sirius (scowling): Why me?

Remus: Because you’re British

Sirius:

Remus (angrily): Five of you colonized half the world, I’m sure you can handle some centaurs

Sirius (angrily): And what about you two?

Remus (stares in *Irish*)

James (scowls in *Indian*)

Sirius (sighing and walking to the centaurs): Well fuck. Tell my mother I hate her.

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What would Peter's Search history look like?

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Maybe someone already said this but marauders fame au with makeup artist! James and movie star! regulus hidden relationship

Director Remus! And actor Sirius

photographer Evan and Nepo baby model barty artist and muse

Author Lily and manager Mary friends to lover

influencer known for witchy content Sybil and influencer known for spiritual content Pandora

Like just imagine it so good just imagine it ahhh lol