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[jewish-jonathansims]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Welcome to the Hellmouth, S01E01

My 2024 Buffy the Vampire Slayer rewatch starts NOW!

Before I jump in, here’s some quick housekeeping:

I’ll endeavour to do this on a weekly basis; watching an episode on Saturday night and writing up a post on Sunday.

I’m not going to worry about spoilers. This show was as good as it was because of how interconnected the themes and storylines were, so if something in season one reminds me of something in season seven, I’m going to mention it.

This is the first time I’ve watched this show (probably) since high school, and it’s almost certainly the first time I’ve watched it from start to finish. It’s actually rather dizzying in this age of eight episode shows that get cancelled after two seasons to consider there are one hundred and forty-four episodes of Buffy that span seven years.

Obviously I am not unaware of Joss Whedon’s mistreatment of others on the set of Buffy, and where it seems relevant I’ll bring it up. But I also don’t think it’s fair to the rest of the cast and crew to throw the entire show under the bus because of one person, especially when it had such a huge (positive) impact on so many lives.

For the record, my favourite ships are Willow/Oz, Giles/Jenny and Spike/Drusilla. My purpose in pointing this out is to make clear that I don’t watch this show to see what true love looks like, but to watch a close-knit band of social misfits fight the forces of evil together. To me, the heart of this show is the friendship between Buffy, Xander, Willow and Giles. The show is always at its strongest when it’s focusing on the four of them, and most of the love stories just don’t interest me that much.

Once season three is over, I’ll start alternating between Buffy and Angel episodes.

Okay, let’s get to it.

First of all, I was not prepared for how dated everything looks and sounds. Naturally my most recent memories of Buffy are watching the later seasons, when there’s cellphones and internet access and fashion choices that wouldn’t seem out of place today – but season one looks like a different era entirely.

There are some references that have dated amusingly (Cordelia and Buffy bond over their shared appreciation for James Spader), some that I didn’t get at all (who’s John Tesh? What’s Debarge?) and a few synthesized musical cues that are straight out of the nineties.

I had forgotten that the Cold Open involves Julie Benz as Darla, and that show-defining twist when it turns out that she’s the vampire and not her predatory date. Ah, Red Shirt #1 played by Carmine Giovinazzo – you have the distinction of being this show’s first victim. I salute you.

Also, it’s amusing to think that we had no idea just how important Darla would end up being to the franchise’s lore. She’s just a standard vampire minion at this early stage, though I do like the fact that she was presumably cast to look a bit like Buffy.

And of course, it all starts at good old Sunnydale High.

Our first glimpse of Buffy Summers begins with her in the middle of a nightmare, which... girl, get used to this plot device. This one is a bit more muddled than her later dreams, made up of a bunch of clips that’ll be used in later episodes that culminate in the Master, the season’s Big Bad.

I had to smile at the sight of those yellow school buses pulling up at the front of Sunnydale High. Buffy may not arrive at school in one of these things, but seven years later, she’s sure as hell going to leave in one.

Joyce – and later on, Angel – are both perfect examples of Characterization Marches On regarding the fact the writers’ room hasn’t quite settled on their personalities yet. In Joyce’s case, she comes across as a lot more flaky than in later appearances.

Oh, and here’s Xander, riding in on a skateboard that we’ll never see him use again across the entire run of the series. I get that he’s a very contentious character in the annals of the show, and though I’m certainly not going to let him off the hook for his occasional (frequent?) shitty behaviour, I also think I’m fonder of him than the average fan.

Honestly, I think Joss Whedon doomed him a little when he stated that Xander was the character most based on him in high school. Suddenly all his entitled, chauvinist behaviour was re-evaluated through the lens of knowing that Whedon was a pretty awful person – but I hope we can all agree that even at his worst, Xander is a MUCH better human being than Whedon.

We’ll see how we go.

Interesting that Willow’s history with Xander is established well before she meets Buffy. Not surprising, since they’ve known each other since early childhood, but interesting. Buffy is the protagonist, but Xander/Willow’s relationship with each other takes precedence when it comes to introducing the gang’s dynamics.

And hey, it’s Eric Balfour as Jesse! Oh man, they really dropped the ball on this character, didn’t they. It’s the one aspect of this two-part premiere that really doesn’t work... but I’ll get to that in good time.

Principle Flutie! Something else I’d totally forgotten; I honestly thought this show started with Snyder.

Also, that initial on his desk plaque is B. Does that mean his name is actually Bob (which is what he tells Buffy to call him)? Not Robert? Weird.

Buffy and Xander’s meetcute involves him helping her pick up some of the spilled contents of her bag, and accidentally saying: “can I have you?” instead of “can I help you?” Oof. Yeah, that’s not an auspicious start.

Buffy meets Cordelia before she meets Willow, and Cordelia comes across as surprisingly nice when she shares her textbook with Buffy and invites her into Sunnydale's popular clique. Then of course, the second relatively big twist of the episode occurs: Cordelia reverts into absolute bitchiness when they come across Willow at the drinking fountain.

Willow scarpers and Buffy looks deeply uncomfortable. There’s a nice subtext across this episode that suggests Buffy was once just like Cordelia, only for her calling to make her more sympathetic to social “losers” like Xander and Willow.

Cordelia also describes the Bronze as being in “the bad part of town”. Huh? I’m going to chalk that one down to more Early Instalment Weirdness, since I don’t think it ever comes up again. (Later Sunnydale is described as a “one Starbucks town”, which is also funny since it’s later revealed to contain a zoo, a shopping mall, several lakes and parks, a military base, and a university).

Buffy enters the library for the first time, and the first thing she sees is a newspaper with an article titled “local boys still missing” outlined in red. The plurality of “boys” means that this isn’t referring to Darla’s kill, which probably only happened the night before anyway. Instead, it’s an indication that there are ongoing problems of a supernatural nature in Sunnydale.

And here’s Giles! The most interesting thing about this interaction is that Giles has clearly been waiting for Buffy. As in, he knows that the Slayer is scheduled to appear in Sunnydale, and that she’s going to be enrolled in its local high school. As Willow says later on, he’s also a newcomer, having only recently taken the position of school librarian.

The show never goes into any more detail than this, but I have so many questions. Clearly Buffy was under surveillance from the Watchers Council, who knew she was coming and made sure Giles had a cover story and a position to fill at Sunnydale High so that he could more easily sidle himself into her life, but a part of me wonders they pulled similar strings for Joyce to get her that job at the art gallery in order to bring Buffy to Sunnydale in the first place.

Evidence for this is that Giles already knows it’s a hotbed for supernatural activity in his discussions with her, though I suppose his dialogue suggests it’s more fate (or the Powers That Be?) rather than the Watchers Council that had a hand in Buffy’s arrival at the Hellmouth (“there’s a reason you’re here and a reason why it’s now”). Still, it’s an interesting theory to ponder, and I always felt it was a shame that the show never delved too deeply into Buffy’s life after she became a Slayer but before she moved to Sunnydale.

(Though I suppose that had to do with the spectre of the 1992 Buffy movie, who’s relationship with this show is a bit tenuous. But now I’m getting off-track).

Buffy flees from Giles and strikes up a conversation with Willow instead. Willow’s eagerness and earnestness is very cute, and though she probably has the most profound development of any other character on this show, I’ll always miss this early dorky version of her.

In describing the library, Buffy says it gives her “the wiggins”. HAH! Remember that word? Remember how it didn’t exist anywhere except this show? Remember how it was essentially Whedon’s attempt to make fetch happen? Aw, man. What a delightful throwback.

On hearing that a body has been found stuffed in a locker, Buffy naturally cannot help but investigate – though I suppose we can chalk it down just as much to her wanting confirmation on whether or not vampires are in town than to any personal sense of responsibility.

Our first glimpse of her super strength comes when she busts through the locked door into the changing room, and she gives a weary “oh great” on seeing the bitemarks in the victim’s neck.

But then of course, she follows this up by sharing her discovery with Giles, who is quick to point out that she’s doing something about it. I have a soft spot for heroes who simply cannot walk away from danger and/or a situation that needs their intervention, regardless of how loudly they grumble about it.

Turns out Xander has heard their entire conversation about vampires and Watchers and Slayers from behind the stacks... which is an elegant not-coincidence since it was established earlier in the episode (in his conversation with Willow) that he was going to the library for a trigonometry book.

Giles is still jabbering about how Sunnydale is a centre of mystical energy that attracts all kinds of supernatural beings, and Buffy’s skepticism naturally gives way to a panning shot of an underground cave where a formidable-looking vampire is intoning “the Sleeper will wake” over a pool of blood.

As villains go, the Master is obviously not particularly inspired, especially since he spends most of this season as a quintessential Orcus on His Throne, but it was also way too early in the game to have a complex or personal Big Bad. You can’t come out the gate with a Glory or an Angelus, and I think he serves his purpose just fine as a Nosferatu-esque spectre that a sixteen-year-old girl would understandably be intimidated by.

Ditto Luke as the show’s Starter Villain: a physical threat to Buffy without being all that interesting.

On Buffy’s way to the Bronze we get our first Angel sighting, and much like Joyce, his characterization is a bit off. He’s way too smarmy and negging, but also... kind of upbeat? It’s amusing to reflect that the writers room knew very little about him at this point, including the fact that he was a vampire (making his “I don’t bite” comment deeply ironic) so it’s lucky that they never filmed any of his scenes in daylight before the truth comes out six episodes later.

In any case, his role in this episode is to namedrop things like “the Mouth of Hell” and “the Harvest” (which Giles will start researching as soon as Buffy passes them on to him) and give Buffy the silver crucifix which... becomes important at some stage? I remember the claddagh ring in season three, but have no recollection of this necklace.

Also intriguing is this dialogue between them: Angel – “I’m a friend.” Buffy – “Maybe I don’t want a friend.” Angel – “I didn’t say I was yours.”

I mean, I know it’s just meaningless banter, but Buffy assumes the “friend” he’s talking about is Giles, who soon confirms that he’s never met him before. So was Angel actually referring to The Powers That Be? Whistler, maybe? Again, I know that this was just filler dialogue with no established context, but I’d be interested to see if it fits in with season two’s flashbacks where he’s introduced to Buffy from a distance.

There’s a very sweet interaction between Buffy and Willow at the Bronze, in which the former gives the latter some advice (“seize the day, because tomorrow you might be dead”) and assures her she’s coming back – despite Willow’s expectation that she won’t – when she spots Giles on an overhead balcony.

The staging of the scene between her and Giles is a bit sus – did he really have to stand behind her and lean over her like that? – but at his insistence she spots a vampire in the crowd, though not because of her preternatural senses, but because of his dated fashion sense. And uh-oh, he’s chatting up Willow, who is unfortunately taking Buffy’s “seize the day” advice.

A throwaway line from Cordelia down on the dance floor is telling: apparently her mother never gets out of bed. Our resident Alpha Bitch clearly doesn’t have a great home life.

Poor Jesse gets the brush-off from Cordelia and runs straight into Darla instead. The reveal is wonderfully corny, in which she swivels around in her hanging basket chair with a smile that wouldn’t melt butter.

We’re heading into the third act cliff-hanger now: Willow is being ushered through a graveyard by her vampiric date, Jesse is clearly also in danger, the Master has risen and sent out his minions to bring him fresh blood, and Xander’s skepticism over Buffy’s Slayer status quickly turns to concern when he learns that Willow is in trouble.

They all converge in a graveyard crypt, and – bless her – Buffy is bantering right off the bat. It’s actually a pretty good tactic, as the vampires are caught off-guard by her confidence. Though... shouldn’t Darla clock the fact that she’s a Slayer? We learn later that she’s familiar with the concept, though this is obviously another case of not having figured out the character’s background at this early stage.

A point in Xander’s favour: Buffy tells him to “go” and instead he enters the crypt to help Jesse and Willow. You have to admit, that’s classic Xander.

And we end with Xander/Willow/Jesse being threatened by more vampires outside, as Luke lowers himself onto Buffy after he’s thrown her into an open tomb. To be continued...

Miscellaneous Observations:

Do we ever get an explanation for the force field that’s keeping the Master trapped underground? It’s obviously magic, so who put it in place?

How did Angel know about the Harvest? Who sent him? I know the answers are still to come, but the question is deliberately left dangling in this episode.

Giles mentions incubus and succubus in his litany of monsters that are attracted to Sunnydale, but I think they’re the only two creatures that never actually appear in the show.

I love the little glimpses of non-main characters going about their business in Sunnydale, namely Aphrodesia and Aura gossiping about Buffy before the dead guy falls out of the latter’s locker. I wonder if those girls made it to Graduation Day...

Watching this episode, the most eye-opening character is Cordelia, who has quite the epic journey ahead of her. It’s almost funny to see her in a role that requires her to be little more than Buffy’s antagonist and foil – essentially what Buffy would have been without her calling. I’m taking a moment to think about where all these characters end up, and it’s pretty dizzying.

Giles gives the famous Slayer mantra: “Into every generation a Slayer is born: one girl in all the world, a Chosen One. She alone will wield the strength and skill to fight the vampires, demons, and forces of darkness; to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their number. She is the Slayer.” This is repeated in the show’s very final episode, and not only forms the crux of Buffy’s entire identity crisis, but also serves as the inspiration for her solution to it. Damn, I love this show.

But who the heck is the guy who speaks these lines in the opening introduction?? It’s later taken over by Anthony Stewart Head, but in season one at least we get a completely unfamiliar narrator.

As excited as I am to embark on this rewatch, I know that after the third season the show loses its centre a bit as the main trio form relationships that are ostensibly more important than the one they have with each other. I love these early seasons because their friendship is clearly the focus of the show – the thing not only protecting them against the forces of evil, but getting them through the hell that is high school.

The show loses its lustre when it loses sight of their bond, but I have three whole seasons to enjoy before that happens. Let’s do this.

Best Line: Cordelia (after Buffy has accidentally slammed her against a wall, thinking she’s a vampire): “Excuse me, I have to call EVERYONE I have EVER met, RIGHT NOW.”

Best Scene: The climatic fight in the crypt, not for the fight itself, but for the shock on Xander and Willow’s faces as the world (and their lives) irrevocably change.

Best Subversion: Obviously when the vulnerable and demure little blonde in the Cold Open reveals herself to be the real danger in the room.

[jewish-jonathansims]

this might get me canceled in the year 2024 but i have to say it: Maggie Walsh was a milf (also clearly not straight) and it's really sad that she was evil and tried to kill Buffy and her friends (but in an annoying way, not in a fun way! if it had been in a fun way, she would've been forgiven and we as a society would be talking more about how hot she was, honestly *shrugs*)

[jewish-jonathansims]

Round 3 Match 7

100 I Guess You Had To Be There vs. 045 Blood Bag

Propaganda under the cut!

100 I Guess You Had To Be There

Well, um, you see...I just think it's funny because....well, this one time me and my dog

silly goofy statement givers

045 Blood Bag

Scientist sucks so much mosquitoes ate him

i just think the premise of "EVIL mosquitos that suck ALL YOUR BLOOD instead of just a little" is funny. they sucked my man dry. naught but a puddle of flesh on the ground

[jewish-jonathansims]

Jon sims is a mint chocolate chip ice cream enjoyer

I never actually tried it myself so I can't say anything about the taste but the two people I know who like chocolate chip mint ice cream make me believe that this is a possibility

[jewish-jonathansims]

Reblog this if you want a tma headcannon in your inbox :)

[jewish-jonathansims]

the temptation to assign creepypastas their fear alignments

[jewish-jonathansims]

someone should draw this as daisy

[jewish-jonathansims]

I saw someone say that there aren't a lot eye centeric statements (especially not in the begging) and they thought it was Elies's doing with is definitely an interesting point I think it's because every statement is an eye statement

The eye compel people to keep writing a lot of people say that they didn't mean to write as must as they do, say that they just want an answer but they still keep writing. And the eye doesn't leave them after that.

It take over their dreams, every statement giver is an eye victim at the end of it

[jewish-jonathansims]

i think i summoned the whole tma fandom just because of my last post

[jewish-jonathansims]

The autism and Judaism are fighting over this one so hard

Tzeitel:

I love her wry sense of humour.

Orsinov:

She’s just an absolute doll <3

[jewish-jonathansims]

Me core

I get so defensive of the women in TMA like "she killed people" "She fed that guy to the distortion!!" "She was mean to Jon!" " She tried to kill Jon" "She set that guy's head on fire!!" "She set that house on fire!" Like, God forbid women have hobbies right??? God forbid women do anything!!!

[jewish-jonathansims]

Update 1:

I have gone through the smaller fandom because there are a lot of fanfiction out there so we have: the night agent, the hunting of hill house and spellslinger (good I love that series)

If you're the author of any fics mention I am not shaming you or making fun of you and you do you (I like the fics I read and those I don't are non of my business)

Don't take this to heart.

Unless what I'm talking about is the tagging thing the tagging thing is annoying and if you do it I would recommend fixing it for the sake of everybody.

I don't think trigger warnings are needed because the triggering stuff are trigger warning that's the point of the tagging thing

Also so far the percentage is 9 to 10 which is interesting

My notes are the smaller font

Let's start

The night agent-67 fics 9.5%

Canon is just a strong suggestion

Zoe | Peter Sutherland's Ex-Fiancée (The Night Agent). (this is mainly funny because of how specific they had to get)

Death at the end but it’s light (haven't read the fic, might just to let you know if the tag lied but it'll spoiler me so maybe later)

they were traumatized before the show, wanted to shine a tiny light on that, now theyre reallyyyy traumatized, from the show not from me, also wanted to shine a light on that

Slow To Update (tryin' to do my best), it ain't much but it's honest work

Some ruthlessness, Nice curtains and tea

The Haunting of Hill House- 337 9%

-so many fics are taged as the hunting of hill house when the only crossover is the settings, it's annoying it's not a crossover is AU-the hunting of hill house (and that was my leason on appropriate taging)

-might do a bonus round for how many insect there is because there's a lot(in presenteges)

basically steve tries to reconcile his entire past and the house eats it up... literally

Houses As Living Things (make sense in context, not really outside of it)

rat poison, thought i should tag that

I wrote this for me but you can read it too if you want

basically i have a lot of feelings about theo crain and here they are, by way of extreme teen angst!

Ghost Sex, The House Made them Do It.

Sex as a way not to talk about things, Glove Kink

relationships get repaired, ghosts get hunted

unreliable narrators give me a headache, but we love Jamie, or whatever her name is?

Smelly feet

I guess? Like there's no specific hurt but there's definitely comfort.

Gratuitous use of metaphors

Steven Crain/ Happiness

Ghost watches as someone fucks their body to resurrect them

Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Character Death ,Mental Health Issues, Child Death, It's a comedy I swear

but only sometimes for the comfort

Suicide, Drug Addiction, but hey Nell is really happy so focus on that

Why can't things ever go right for the Crains??? (A stupid house that's why)

wow this sounds really dark, matt pointing angrily: DON'T BOTHER LUKE

I'm packing this family full of love and support they deserve it, love and support

all aboard the sin train

i have a feeling they both try to be sarcastic smartasses but end up being all cute

steve: how will i ever be forgiven... i have done so much wrong..., luke: i'm actually not that mad i just-, steve: WHAT COULD I POSSIBLY DO TO WIN BACK YOUR RESPECT

this got surprisingly dark, I can't control my stories

vaguely Christmas-related, i guess i'm that guy posting a christmas fic on december 1st

Hospitals are much more practical than haunted houses

Remember That One Time You Walked in on Your Parents Having Sex?

Angst with a Happy Ending, Happy ending being death

the one where i needed to write about luke because i fell in love with him

I need more fan stuff with the crain siblings because I love them and I've adopted all of them

Spellslinger- 7 fics 10%

hurt/comfort without the comfort I'll be honest with you

I need a direction so I am going to go through through as many fandoms I can in AO3 and write the most unhinged/funny tags I find.

I AM REMOVING FILTERS, I NEVER REMOVE FILTERS THEY ARE THE BEST THING TO BE INVENTED BUT IT'S FOR SCIENCE

BTW you might find that my fandoms are very inconsistent, that because they are, some are years old (pjo mainly being my first real fandom and it never really left) we also have a lot of crime shows, I watch those with my mom (especially the British once but not only) there is obviously TMA because TMA is just part of who I am for ever and always and will never leave, which spread into general horror. And there are cartoons. And very mainstream stuff , also there is stuff no one knows exist, I am not a consistent person when it comes to genre.

Did I mention I have a full time job as well as a few school deadlines and just a lot of shit going on?

This is going to consume me

BTW this is early 2000's to mid 2010's pjo fandom fault, wtf was going on back there??

[jewish-jonathansims]

I need a direction so I am going to go through through as many fandoms I can in AO3 and write the most unhinged/funny tags I find.

I AM REMOVING FILTERS, I NEVER REMOVE FILTERS THEY ARE THE BEST THING TO BE INVENTED BUT IT'S FOR SCIENCE

BTW you might find that my fandoms are very inconsistent, that because they are, some are years old (pjo mainly being my first real fandom and it never really left) we also have a lot of crime shows, I watch those with my mom (especially the British once but not only) there is obviously TMA because TMA is just part of who I am for ever and always and will never leave, which spread into general horror. And there are cartoons. And very mainstream stuff , also there is stuff no one knows exist, I am not a consistent person when it comes to genre.

Did I mention I have a full time job as well as a few school deadlines and just a lot of shit going on?

This is going to consume me

BTW this is early 2000's to mid 2010's pjo fandom fault, wtf was going on back there??

[jewish-jonathansims]

We went to a concert together a few weeks ago, and I have to say that we still make fun of each other's music taste

The fact Jonathan actually got Will to like his music and admit it is so impressive because I have two little sister and they hate all of my music, they will like the song and say "that's bad music" and I'll literally see them listening to it on their own, because they have to pretend to not like stuff your siblings like.

Once both of them went through a one direction phase at the same time and in made fun of each other for it, you make fun of your siblings music it's a rule.

[jewish-jonathansims]

This post was made in the disappointment of one of my favorites artists making his English debut, which was so bad that I refuse to relisten to it, even while making a detailed list of my opinion of each one of his songs

Maybe in a while from now when I'll get over the disappointment, don't think it will happen soon but let's see

If you want to translate your songs think about the culture context you didn't notice, also think about how differently stuff sound to the average English listener not to you

[jewish-jonathansims]

Malls

Thinking about branching out on the cursed objects we leave at people's houses - gotta update with the times - does anyone have a good reccomendation on where to find good stock?

[jewish-jonathansims]

Season one Jon is so funny

"Not because of Mr. Hodge’s experience, although I’m sure it was very upsetting. If it was true, of course"

"Still, that’s not really what concerns me either, though obviously it’s a tragic loss of life, etcetera, etcetera"

These lines crack me up every time what do you mean etcetera etcetera someone died my guy