jo1308 - Tumblr blog

[jo1308]

One day you'll look into my lifeless eyes and realize much too late that it wasn't my time.

[jo1308]

Dear parents,

I'm sorry I hurt u even when your not sorry u hurt me.

I'm sorry I yelled at u even though that's all u do.

I'm sorry for ignoring you, and for getting anxious when you're around.

I'm sorry that i seem heartless for hiding the tears u caused.

I'm sorry for being here but how is that my fault?

I didn't chose to be alive but I'm choosing to give up, not today or tomorrow I don't know when but not yet.

I want my happy life back where I wasn't filled with a burning pain u helped cause.

I want to start all over and do everything I've always dreamed of.

But we can't start over can we? We've burned the bridge between us and anger and resentment filled that gap.

How I wish we could put it all behind us so I could be exactly how u want be to be. I don't care how much I have to change, I'd change everything about myself if it meant you would love me more.

Sincerely,

Your daughter who will always love u even when u hurt me without realizing

[jo1308]

“I had no idea what I wanted, only that I wanted something, which is the worst kind of wanting.”

— David Levithan; Love Is The Higher Law

[jo1308]

Life is cruel...

Death is freedom.

[jo1308]

And all

Of a sudden I felt

Really tired.

Like the world has drained

Me for everything

That I had.

-via

[jo1308]

It's hard to turn the page when you know someone won't be in the next chapter...

But the story must go on

- Thomas Wilder

[jo1308]

I need to cut myself, I don't think I can survive another minute if I don't.

[jo1308]

"why are you so skinny?"seems less offensive than "why are you so fat?"

[jo1308]

So.

Many.

Fucking.

Lies.

[jo1308]

What's the point of living if you can't make jokes about dying?

[jo1308]

It's scary how I detach myself from people, because I can love you to death and never speak to you again.

[jo1308]

You asked why I did this

And I told you I didn't know,

But that wasn't the truth.

I needed to feel the pain u caused leave my body,

The anger and sadness leave my body like I imagine death would.

[jo1308]

I hope that someday

When I'm gone,

Someone,

Somewhere,

Picks my soul up

Off these pages

And thinks,

"I would've loved her."

- stoole lyons

[jo1308]

Isn't it funny how

Day by day

Nothing changes

But when you look back

Everything is different

-C.S Lewis

[jo1308]

Waking up every morning crying until you can’t breathe because you made it to another day

[jo1308]

Everyone is happy and laughing and completely unaware that I might not be here in a few days.

[jo1308]

"it hurts.

It's hurts a lot,

But I'll keep it to myself so it doesn't hurt anyone else."

-dying-ohso-soon