lapinou

[lapinou]

Fantasia (1940) - The Nutcracker Suite

[lapinou]

do you have favorite LPS?

Chewability scale: Shorthair Cats (any)— 10 Hermit Crab (any)— 9.5 Beta Fish (any)— 7.5

Chewability wise, the shorthair cats. Aesthetic wise, #99 white rabbit. I love them so much.

[lapinou]

Please, ignore any videos or posts that come across your page that attempt to convince you that suicide is a reasonable option. I do not care what sob story this person will tell you in attempt to convince you that is a reasonable option: it is NOT. You are better off STAYING ALIVE, even when living feels unwelcoming.

Do not give your life up just because somebody else wants you to. These people do not care for the disabled, mentally ill, suffering, and many other communities. Do NOT listen to anybody who believes they have ANY authority over your life; they do not. You deserve to keep fighting, even when it feels at its most difficult.

No matter how horrific and unwelcoming living may feel, it will get easier and easier overtime. Little by little, bit by bit. Life may take its time to get better but it is worth fighting to stay alive and seeing the positive outcome waiting for you in the future— one you would never get to witness if you were gone.

You are needed in this world, even if you may not feel that way. There is always going to be a place for specifically YOU in this world, even when you think otherwise. Your worth is NOT defined by any of the struggles and/or hardships that impact your life. You do not have to do ANYTHING to prove yourself as worthy. You simply existing is enough. That, I promise.

[lapinou]

Having been neglected to such an extreme severity throughout my entire life… it leaves me frustrated very often with a need to ramble my feelings out.

I remember still being a child and viewing what people were saying about familial neglect. At the time, I didn’t realize that I faced neglect so severe that any neglect less severe seemed “normal” to me.

Thinking about what I was forced to live makes me sick. It makes me want to rip my skin off, it makes me want to SCREAM UNTIL THE THOUGHTS STOP HURTING TO REMEMBER.

They RUINED my first kiss, they RUINED my virginity, THEY DARE MADE ME IMPURE THEN FORCED ME TO REPENT. FORCED ME TO APOLOGIZE TO THEM. I ATE INSECTS BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME IT WAS NORMAL. I SLEPT WITH INSECTS BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME IT WAS NORMAL. I NEVER LEARNED TO BATHE OR BRUSH MY TEETH UNTIL I WAS AN ADULT BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME IT WAS NORMAL. YOU MADE ME FEAR MEDICINE. YOU MADE ME FEAR MEDICAL HELP. YOU MADE ME FEAR BEING TOUCHED. I HATE THEM I HATE THEM ALL SO FUCKING MUCH FUCK I HATE THEM I REALLY HATE THEM I HOPE THEY ALL BURN BURN AND ROT BURN AND ROT BURN AND ROT BURN AND ROT THEY TORTURED ME THEY FUCKING TORTURED ME AND GOT AWAY WITH IT FUCKKKFUCKFUCK

DO NOT COME TO THIS POST ACTING LIKE YOU RELATE TO ME YOU FUCKING CANNOT RELATETO ME IM TIRED OF YOUR LIESSS YOUR BULLSHIT LIES TO COMFORT ME. THIS IS ABOUT CULT ABUSE AND MORE YOU CANT COMPREHEND YOU FUCKK YOUNUST WANT TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER YOU CANT NOBODY CAN NOBODY CAN HELP ME LOL

[lapinou]

me and who

[lapinou]

I found some of my LPS from my childhood recently… I had so much more but I suppose they were lost with time.

[lapinou]

ACRYLIC PAINT ON LAYERED ACRYLIC PLATES

Full videos: 🐟 🌸 🐟

[lapinou]

Are you alright?

Hello, I assure you that my dear is quite alright.

If you happened to see any post he made earlier, I deeply apologize. He has not had the best of days and he has been very mentally distraught.

He experiences severe psychosis and delusions, especially around nighttime or during stressful situations. This might result in a genuine belief that he is being watched, followed, blackmailed, attacked, and such. Everything is well, he was merely not in a good place.

Thank you for your concern.

[lapinou]

🧸 🌼💐 TEDDY BEARS 💐🌼🧸

Cornflower 🌼 Forget-Me-Not 🌼 Violet

Wild Rose 🧸 Sunflower 🧸 Alpine Rose

Butterfly Orchid 🌷 Water Lily 🌷 Wild Tulip

German Camomile 💐 Little Hazelnut 💐 Little Snow Drop

Little Flower Bears with: Daisy 🌻 Clover 🌻 Wild-Rose

[lapinou]

👻 🦇 🌼

All of them have very different aesthetics and personalities despite being siblings.

👻 🦇 🌼

[lapinou]

This is not even slightly funny… but when I think about how two twins lured me, when I was a child, into their locked bedroom with the promise of cotton candy and other sweets to inappropriately preform a ritual on me it makes me laugh. Did they know I absorbed my own twin. Did they feel it. Did they know.

[lapinou]

your aesthetic is very dainty and delicate, it's pleasant to look at

-🌼🌹

Thank you, I appreciate it.

[lapinou]

日本画を描くメイキング＆作業音 Process and Sound of Painting Orchids with Nihonga Paints

Full video: 🌺

[lapinou]

While I want to thank you for all you continue to do for me, I feel a stronger need to bow my head and beg for your forgiveness.

I know— you do not believe it is necessary to hear my apologies, but… I want to still offer them to you.

I had been ungrateful for so long. I purposefully turned away and covered my eyes and ears whenever you offered your assistance to me. I was selfish. I thought I would be alright— alone. Alone felt safe… because it felt safe to deny the care and positive emotions that you held for me. It was much easier to believe that you hate me or want to use me— I now see that you do not.

Thank you for not leaving me alone. For not abandoning me even when I lost my temper and tried to hurt your feelings. For the second, third, and fourth chances. For taking care of me.

Thank you for everything. You kept me safe.

[lapinou]

🍰 Angel Food Cake

🍫 Summer S'mores

🍑 Peaches n' Cream

Full videos: 🍓 🍓

[lapinou]

🍋 Frozen Lavender Lemonade 🍉 Watermelon Sugar 🧁 Raspberry Macaron

Full videos: 🍓 🍓

[lapinou]

Alice in Wonderland (1951) dir. by Clyde Geronimi, Wilfred Jackson, and Hamilton Luske.