letters-ill-never-write - Tumblr blog

[letters-ill-never-write]

Everyone asks me what it's like living with your significant other. They ask me if it's just like what they've dreamed of, dancing in the middle of the living room to your favorite song, making cupcakes together and getting into a mini food fight with frosting, taking intimate baths together, and each night you go to bed at the same time while you hold each other until you drift off to a peaceful sleep. It sounds perfect.

Here's the thing, living with him isn't perfect. We fight more than we used to, and about ridiculous things. We typically eat out or get food at work and bring it home. The one time we cooked together we got into an argument over who was washing dishes. The bathtub is tiny and has odd stains that I don't care to dwell on. Since my boyfriend is in school and I'm not he's usually up late doing homework and I go to bed before him because I have two jobs that start bright and early in the morning. We try to hold each other throughout the night but sometimes it's just uncomfortable to be held or hold someone for 8+ hours. Living with him isn't perfect, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I get to come home to his smiling face everyday. When I'm sick I always have someone to take care of me, and vice versa. When I do cook I get to hear him compliment me on my cooking skills (plus we finally agreed after that fight if I cook he cleans ;)) we get to have movie parties on weekends when we're off and we get to raise our ratties together. Living with your significant other will never be like what they show in the movies. It will never be perfect but we'll make it as perfect as we can.

I wrote this sitting next to you.

m.x.

[letters-ill-never-write]

I just want to be your peace. When your head lays on my chest, I want you to forget the world and all it’s problems. Escape in me and give me all your stress and worries, I’ll take it all for you just to see you smile without having to fake it.

Joe Brock (via perrfectly)

[letters-ill-never-write]

I always swore, I would never do long distance Too much effort, Too much time, Too much money. People told me: “It never works out.” “Someone will end up cheating.” “How can it be real when you never see him?” “You’ll end up getting hurt.” The truth is, I’ve never met anyone With a heart like yours A heart so similar to mine Someone who loves like I do. I’ve never had someone, Who I can tell everything to. I can talk for hours and never grow bored I can listen forever and still want more Completely barred souls. We wasted time with the others Hiding our feelings Breaking your heart I won’t wait any longer I’m ready now. I always swore, I would never do long distance Until you.

We’re gonna make it work. -m.x. (via moltensulfur)

[letters-ill-never-write]

"forever?" "sounds good to me"

[letters-ill-never-write]

tiny little kisses.

when i was first to wake i would gently place a tiny little kiss upon your face

i loved you most when you were dreaming of me

it must have been a monday

i felt you walking into the café your eyes, adjusting to the light reminiscent of my favorite sight

do you still dream of me?

i think you loved me most before i stopped writing poems before i lost myself and fell out of touch in the moment

i couldn’t focus on the present while distracted by the past i’ve come to regret it looking back

i’m sorry if i let it eat our love alive

there you were, on a monday freshly risen from your sleep

the first thought that came to me were all of the times i used to wake and gently place a kiss upon your face

such a tiny little thing to miss

i think i love you most whenever i’m writing poems

i find myself and fall in love with tiny little moments i never knew i’d miss

i never thought i’d have to keep a kiss from your cheek

i never thought you’d leave

but i just couldn’t see that half of the problem was me

it must have been a monday you waltzed in, wearing sun rays a flower in the garden, blooming just after eight in the morning

do you still dream of me?

i think you still love me maybe it’s just dormant but i can’t help you find it

eventually, you’ll realize that it’s all about timing and maybe it’ll be too late when the feeling arises

but i know one thing: it’s the tiny little moments that you’ll come to miss and the tiny little kisses that i used to give

maybe you’ll love me most when i stop writing for you

[letters-ill-never-write]

I can’t wait until I can roll over at 2 a.m to find your lips instead of a text.

(via ha-ze)

[letters-ill-never-write]

Half finished poetry. Unopened emails. Cancelled plans. An unmade bed. Panic attacks at 4am. Three cups of spilled coffee. Hands that constantly shake. Books that will never be finished, no matter what I convince myself. Friendships that either never last or I let consume me. Constant headaches. A lack of apathy. Too much apathy. A hunger for success, but no motivation to actually succeed. Refresh, refresh, refresh. A lack of warmth, in every sense. Unnecessary kindness towards those who will most definitely throw it back in my face but no desire to subdue or refrain from giving it.

If I had to sum myself up (via lustful-energy)

[letters-ill-never-write]

I want to tell you that I’m falling in love with you. ‘Like’ was never the word to describe what I felt for you. I was enamored. I think I was in love with you on that very first day and since then I’ve found more reasons to love you and my heart has become more and more of you and now it’s all you. This thing in my chest– it’s got your name carved all over it and I never saw it happen. One day I woke up and I said to myself, “I’m in love with you and that’s it.” That is it. You and me? I want this. I want this painful, crazy, swirling thing and I want it with you. And not a lot of people can say that. You want to fight at 2 am over bills? I do. That’s real. That’s the real thing. You forgot to get milk? I’ll stop after my twelve hour day and pick it up and I’ll still kiss you when I walk in the door because you’re here and isn’t that everything? You are here and I love you and even if nothing else ever made sense– that does. I love you. That’s the beginning and end of it all.

-I probably won’t get the courage to say this to you. (via brizzlewritesthings)

[letters-ill-never-write]

Do you ever meet someone and you’re just like “wow, I want life with you. I want to take you on that first date that I will spend days planning. I want to take you on that second date that will still be just as nerve racking as the first. I want to share that first kiss with you that will stop my heart. I want to go on countless random adventures with you. I want to walk the streets at 3 a.m and talk about life with you. I want to lay in a field on a blanket with you, looking at the sky, and still think that it’s beauty doesn’t begin to compare to yours. I want to wake up in the middle of the night craving you and be able to turn over and have you right there. I want everything that life has to offer. The beautiful and good things and then scary and dark things. But I want it all with you.”

[letters-ill-never-write]

Date someone who is a home and an adventure all at once

@sexual-texts (via sexual-texts)

[letters-ill-never-write]

[letters-ill-never-write]

I’m okay for a few weeks and then all the sudden it’s like I forget she’s not a part of my life anymore. That I’ll never feel her lips against mine anymore. I’ll never feel the way she used to hug me and she would bury her head into me and I into her. I can’t seem to forget about the way she would hold my hand in the car and randomly grab it and kiss the back of it. Or how she would burst out singing in the car to 80s music. Or the way she would laugh and put her whole soul into it. I try to forget and I can’t. And it hurts and I want to stop thinking about her at 11:52 and then at 10:26 pm and again at 2:37 in the morning and as soon as i can form a thought in the morning it’s always her. But I don’t want it to be any one else but her. It was always supposed to be temporary “I promise you I’ll be back.” “You’re all that I want.” “I’m going to get you out of here one day.” What happened to all of those promises? She swore she never broke promises but I guess I’m an exception. She was good. Everything she did was good for me. She’s the one who I stopped cutting for. Because I couldn’t disappoint her again. I couldn’t do it. But I kept fucking up so much and I fucked up so so bad when I lost her. When I would get angry and tell her things I didn’t mean. And I regret it. And I can’t tell her any of this

I’m sorry.

-m.x.

[letters-ill-never-write]

I think that if we had met under the right circumstances, we would’ve been perfect for each other. But life doesn’t work that way, and I’m always a little too late.

-We could’ve written a love story for the ages.

-m.t.t.

(via mysilentconfessionstoyou)

[letters-ill-never-write]

fighting the urge to kiss you is like fighting the gravity that’s pulling us closer together

(via lovequohte)

[letters-ill-never-write]

She wraps her legs around your waist. She whispers in your ear. “Stay.” This is your cue to kiss her. Wrap your fingers in her hair; enclose them around her neck. Hard. Just hard enough to feel her pulse, the quiet beat beat beating.  She won’t always be this vulnerable, this open. Right now her trust is in the palm of your hand. This is your cue to pull her closer. Place a gentle thumb on her bottom lip and breathe. “Stay, stay, stay” she says. Tell her you will. Tell her: “okay.”

S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #200 (via blossomfully)

[letters-ill-never-write]

I looked and looked at her, and I knew, as clearly as I know that I will die, that I loved her more than anything I had ever seen or imagined on earth. She could fade and wither - I didn’t care. I would still go mad with tenderness at the mere sight of her face.

Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita (via thegoodvybe)

[letters-ill-never-write]

I’m going to love you. I’m going to love you in your weakest moments to your strongest ones. I’m going to love you when you’re happy and I’m going to still love you the most when you’re sad. Don’t you understand? I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. I want to love you, each and every piece of you. I want you with your imperfections as much as I want you for you. And I’m always going to want you, I’m always going to be here loving you with everything.

im here// (via tullipsink)