lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

disqualification propaganda

How is it cishet media?

Clue: the final line of the movie is “I’m going home to sleep with my wife!” spoken by either a gay guy pretending to be straight to his boss or a straight guy pretending to be gay and then coming out as straight at the end. everyone else is definitely supposed to be cishet even though I say otherwise.

LB: evil gay vampires getting in the way of a cishet lovestory

How is it lgbt?

Clue: SUPER CAMPY!!!!! and Tim Curry and Lesley Ann Warren were there bisexualizing it. The outfits and acting in the movie went hard.

LB: those vampires were gay and trans why else did they wear leather when it was so hot out. they got a single ear piercing which was the way back then to signal other gay people you were gay (they did it on the other ear not the gay ear but I know what was happening)

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

How is it cishet media?

VP: Cishet romance good vs evil plot AND the main character is a priest. The movie I’m talking about is The Velocipastor (2018) of course

LB: evil gay vampires getting in the way of a cishet lovestory

How is it lgbt?

VP: It’s camp to me. The only sex scene is a montage of the main characters (a sex worker and titular velocipastor) bonding over the course of the movie. MAJOR FLASH WARNING but you can find it here https://youtu.be/Wp9hcCFEgOw . It’s a low budget film (some of the FX is literally just text on a screen telling you what’s there) where you can tell everyone involved is having fun with it and it’s one of my favorite things ever. I’ve heard white gay people on tumblr love subverting christian imagery soooo there’s that too

LB: those vampires were gay and trans why else did they wear leather when it was so hot out. they got a single ear piercing which was the way back then to signal other gay people you were gay (they did it on the other ear not the gay ear but I know what was happening)

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

Pink Flamingos is on Archive.org download it and make all your friends and family watch it

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

@servingcuntdracula

ok we'll dual poll this

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

How is it cishet media?

VP: Cishet romance good vs evil plot AND the main character is a priest. The movie I’m talking about is The Velocipastor (2018) of course

LB: evil gay vampires getting in the way of a cishet lovestory

How is it lgbt?

VP: It’s camp to me. The only sex scene is a montage of the main characters (a sex worker and titular velocipastor) bonding over the course of the movie. MAJOR FLASH WARNING but you can find it here https://youtu.be/Wp9hcCFEgOw . It’s a low budget film (some of the FX is literally just text on a screen telling you what’s there) where you can tell everyone involved is having fun with it and it’s one of my favorite things ever. I’ve heard white gay people on tumblr love subverting christian imagery soooo there’s that too

LB: those vampires were gay and trans why else did they wear leather when it was so hot out. they got a single ear piercing which was the way back then to signal other gay people you were gay (they did it on the other ear not the gay ear but I know what was happening)

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

How is it cishet media?

VP: Cishet romance good vs evil plot AND the main character is a priest. The movie I’m talking about is The Velocipastor (2018) of course

LB: evil gay vampires getting in the way of a cishet lovestory

How is it lgbt?

VP: It’s camp to me. The only sex scene is a montage of the main characters (a sex worker and titular velocipastor) bonding over the course of the movie. MAJOR FLASH WARNING but you can find it here https://youtu.be/Wp9hcCFEgOw . It’s a low budget film (some of the FX is literally just text on a screen telling you what’s there) where you can tell everyone involved is having fun with it and it’s one of my favorite things ever. I’ve heard white gay people on tumblr love subverting christian imagery soooo there’s that too

LB: those vampires were gay and trans why else did they wear leather when it was so hot out. they got a single ear piercing which was the way back then to signal other gay people you were gay (they did it on the other ear not the gay ear but I know what was happening)

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

How is it cishet media?

TWoO: The characters are cishet

Clue: the final line of the movie is “I’m going home to sleep with my wife!” spoken by either a gay guy pretending to be straight to his boss or a straight guy pretending to be gay and then coming out as straight at the end. everyone else is definitely supposed to be cishet even though I say otherwise.

How is it lgbt?

TWoO: “A friend of dorothy” was LGBT slang for a gay man. I always liked how it sounded.

Clue: SUPER CAMPY!!!!! and Tim Curry and Lesley Ann Warren were there bisexualizing it. The outfits and acting in the movie went hard.

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

How is it cishet media?

Fargo: Protagonist is a pregnant lady with a normal man husband and a normal man job. antagonist is a man with a wife and son. so much nucelar family, booooringgggg (my favourite movie of all time)

Clue: the final line of the movie is “I’m going home to sleep with my wife!” spoken by either a gay guy pretending to be straight to his boss or a straight guy pretending to be gay and then coming out as straight at the end. everyone else is definitely supposed to be cishet even though I say otherwise.

How is it lgbt?

Fargo: Twinky boy (steve buscemi) in a turtleneck kind of loosely calls his big buff crime partner (peter stormare) or at least says the word “daddy” WAY too much and in very close proximity to BLOOD and MURDER. also he stares at him the entire time they’re hooking up with two girls its so funny they didnt even try to hide it. they fucking hate each other and its insane and i love them and it ends in murder with a big fucking axe and a woodchipper, there is nothing queerer than whatever the hell was going on there

Clue: SUPER CAMPY!!!!! and Tim Curry and Lesley Ann Warren were there bisexualizing it. The outfits and acting in the movie went hard.

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

lol the main lead actors for each movie are father and son irl. well you know the drill

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

How is it cishet media?

LB: evil gay vampires getting in the way of a cishet lovestory

The Exorcist: A movie (sort-of) beloved by the Catholic Church that promotes traditional family values. Has a lot of homophobic language, and it was released around Christmas. Only one gay character and they only tell you through a flamboyant gesture. Screen writer and book author was homophobic enough to make petitions to “un-catholic” the catholic school featured in this film (they were reaching out to gay students and having pride so he wrote an angry letter to the bishop) and it shows. The Vatican once invited the director to come over specifically because of the exorcist :(((

How is it lgbt?

LB: those vampires were gay and trans why else did they wear leather when it was so hot out. they got a single ear piercing which was the way back then to signal other gay people you were gay (they did it on the other ear not the gay ear but I know what was happening)

Exorcist: Regan is sooo off-putting and a bad daughter. This is just what being queer and having several diseases is like minus the exorcism. Her voice gets deep while she acts rebellious and her mom rejects her. Damien Karras (the younger priest) also reads as so repressedly gay and in the closet in the original book, but the movie squeezes in a bit of that with a scene where Fr. Dyer lays Karras to bed, and they hold hands until Karras eventually recoils with so much pathetic pain. I KNOW what you are. (https://afieldinengland.tumblr.com/post/657429236105248768/they-were-in-love-here) Karras and Dyer are even closer in the book, and Dyer is his stereotypically effeminate “ride or die” gay best friend. He told him to leave the priesthood with him since the gays are doing it, meanwhile all the other local priests were panicking about gay priests. The movie is extremely quotable too and I find that camp. Also found “Mother what’s wrong with me?” and “That thing upstairs is not my daughter” to be sooo personal. I know it’s homophobic but it helped me come out more somehow because I don’t want to DIE like that. Saw some fun Regan MacNeil dragqueens, trans posts and non-binary comics (with regan and karras) awhile ago as well. In the 90s, a reviewer said that the movie was actually a priest’s homoerotic wet dream (and that’s why they wanted to kill pazuzu the “female element”) and it so threw off the director to the point that his biography, an analytical book on the exorcist by kermode, AND some articles will bring it up as a bizarre theory or serious analysis. Well I say the reviewer had a point, but with the wrong priest. Dyer is the only confirmed gay character who gets censored a lot, but I know what those two had. Big closeted catholic energy. That’s why Regan was so homophobic. She read Karras’ mind.

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

‼️🇵🇸🇮🇱🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 Palestine Action Scotland cuts Leonardo’s Edinburgh factory’s internet cables, disrupting the production of laser targeting systems for Israeli Jets

[Plain text: Palestine Action Scotland cuts Leonardo’s Edinburgh factory’s internet cables, disrupting the production of laser targeting systems for Israeli Jets ]

🔸 source: pal_action_scot and pal_action

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

i remember seeing someone say "these were old words for 'gay' that i thought were really cute" online and on the list was 'pansy' and 'fairy'. on one hand, i wish people knew that was derogatory, on the other hand im glad the memory seems distant enough now

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

The loser is either too queer to be a cishet movie or too cishet to be queer…

How is it cishet media?

TWoO: The characters are cishet

9t5: Everyone here cishet and the main women have or had a husband at some point.

How is it lgbt?

TWoO: "A friend of dorothy" was LGBT slang for a gay man. I always liked how it sounded.

9t5 Dolly Parton smokes a blunt with her girl best friends at a bar. And support each other in the workplace.

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

i forgot about this blog sorry

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

How is it cishet media?

Fargo: Protagonist is a pregnant lady with a normal man husband and a normal man job. antagonist is a man with a wife and son. so much nucelar family, booooringgggg (my favourite movie of all time)

The Bodyguard : cishet love story AND the titular character feels guilt for the fact conservative bitch Ronald Regan got shot.

How is it lgbt?

Fargo: Twinky boy (steve buscemi) in a turtleneck kind of loosely calls his big buff crime partner (peter stormare) or at least says the word “daddy” WAY too much and in very close proximity to BLOOD and MURDER. also he stares at him the entire time they’re hooking up with two girls its so funny they didnt even try to hide it. they fucking hate each other and its insane and i love them and it ends in murder with a big fucking axe and a woodchipper, there is nothing queerer than whatever the hell was going on there

The Bodyguard : listen to the soundtrack and watch the performances. especially queen of the night and i’ll always love you. tell me it didn’t contribute anything to the LGBT community and fashion. look at me. LOOK AT ME. also kevin cosner and whitney houston don’t even end up with each other in the end because of circumstances. we hate cishetero love in this house

Bodyguard Propaganda:

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

Happy birthday sodomites 😍

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

It’s pride month so everyone has to kneel and kiss my royal cock ring

[lgbt-cishet-movie-tournament]

How is it cishet media?

My Cousin Vinny: MY COUSIN VINNY straight marriage, bad lawyer dude who doesnt listen to his wife's advice until the very end - no queer coding at all. Set in Alabama. The inequalities of the legal system.

Clue: the final line of the movie is “I’m going home to sleep with my wife!” spoken by either a gay guy pretending to be straight to his boss or a straight guy pretending to be gay and then coming out as straight at the end. everyone else is definitely supposed to be cishet even though I say otherwise.

How is it lgbt?

My Cousin Vinny: Marisa Tomei as Mona Lisa Vito (enough said) but also she a car girlie 😋. Vinny and Mona Lisa are so t4t TO ME. Ralph Macchio is there. They're Italians in Alabama and identified as "outsiders" and looked down on because of that--very queer.

Clue: SUPER CAMPY!!!!! and Tim Curry and Lesley Ann Warren were there bisexualizing it. The outfits and acting in the movie went hard.