megabadbunny

[megabadbunny]

One of the other issues I have with 'men are happier/better when they embrace femininity, being feminine is freeing for everyone' is that the standards for what count as feminine to begin with are so entrenched in misogyny and toxic masculinity that we fail to realise that some of what we deem 'feminine' is just...average things everyone can experience that has nothing to do with gender (feeling emotions, enjoying soft physical touch like cuddling) or could have nothing to do with gender if society loosened up and thought logically for a moment (wearing certain colours).

Like, the bar is just so fucking low tbh.

We have the evidence that allows us to track when pink was for boys, high heels were originally made for men, men used to wear make up with bright frilly clothing and act in certain ways that would have them labelled as effeminate (derogatory) nowadays. Sidenote: Obviously not in every culture, I'm speaking from a white Western experience.

And that's my gripe.

In a misogyny led society, things are deemed feminine as a way to denounce their worth. If women start to do something that men do or previously did and they cannot be forced to stop doing that (because forcing them to stop doing 'man things' is the first go to for misogynists) then either it is abandoned as 'for women' until people forget men were a part of it or it was previously gender neutral, or a special 'feminine' version of it is created to make it acceptable to share (see: trousers).

Men that then try to take part in that thing in some way are bullied for it and either have their gender questioned until dysphoria (because even cis people get gender dysphoria) makes them stop and hide their natural inclinations/likes or they get labelled as some Other in terms of their gender (it wasn't so long ago that being a gay man was seen as basically another gender aside from man or woman) or a term that is more than partially derogatory is created to describe such 'unusual' behaviour from a man (e.g. metrosexual).

When the actual truth is...all humans have emotions. All humans should be able to freely express them. Working together to share chores and earning money and raising children creates better stronger relationships. Physical touch is pleasant, even if sex isn't involved. Colours are just colours, fabrics are just fabrics, nothing about your biology dictates liking certain clothes or media genres or anything like that. Grooming yourself even to a certain extreme is fine, it's okay to want to look good and smell nice. Our body language should not be policed into 'male' and 'female' and neither should our language, knowledge, hobbies and interests.

It's not that 'men are more free when feminine, because femininity is freeing', it's that things we've been taught are 'only for women' or 'inherently feminine' aren't and what men are then officially 'allowed' restricts them tighter and tighter as time goes on.

See for example, the happiness of a trans man or gnc woman/butch lesbian. When masculinity is experienced on purpose in a way that is fully chosen and therefore expressed as desired it creates the same euphoric feelings as those embracing 'feminine' things after being told for years that they can/should not. Because expressing ourselves as we feel most natural is what is actually freeing.

[megabadbunny]

Angel 🦇: S05E02 "Just Rewards"

"I'm his date."

[megabadbunny]

The other night husband and I were watching a documentary about the yeti where they were doing DNA analysis of samples of supposed yeti fur, and every one of them came back as bears.

Anyway, the next night we watched a thing about some pig man who is supposed to live in Vermont. People said it had claws and a pig nose but walked upright like a man. Now, I happen to know that sideshows used to shave bears and present them as pig men. So every piece of evidence they gave of this monster sounds to me like a bear with mange.

So now the running joke in our house is that everything is bears. Aliens? Bears. Loch Ness monster? Bear. Every cryptozoological mystery is just a very crafty bear.

Bears. They’re everywhere. Be wary. Anyone or anything could be a bear.

[megabadbunny]

i hate it when i cant even write a poem about something because its too obvious. like in the airbnb i was at i guess it used to be a kids room cause you could see the imprint of one little glow in the dark star that had been missed and painted over in landlord white. like that's a poem already what's the point

[megabadbunny]

the worst part about ocd and ocd-like tendencies is that you think hyper-analyzing your thoughts and constantly psychoanalyzing yourself will fix you but that's actually part of the disorder. it's the disorder. disordering.

[megabadbunny]

googling shit like "why do i feel bad after hanging out with my friends" and all of the answers are either "you need better friends" (i don't; my friends are wonderful) or "your social battery is drained, you need to rest and regain your energy levels" (i don't; i've got tons of energy, it's just manifesting as over-the-top neurotic mania). why is this even happening. it's like some stupid toll i have to pay as a punishment for enjoying myself too much

[megabadbunny]

i love you green. i love you forests. i love you smell of damp earth. i love you feeling before the storm breaks. i love you moss. i love you rivers. i love you streams. i love you thunderstorms. i love you sunlight shining through leaves.

[megabadbunny]

when you cook for everyone and they tell you how much they like the food

[megabadbunny]

BLACK PANTHER 2017, dir. Ryan Coogler

[megabadbunny]

like an old-fashioned song

read this on ao3 here!

The problem is this: after everyone’s hugged and eaten and congratulated, after they’ve had the medal ceremony, after the base is finally quiet... Leia still has to go to bed.

The unease starts as she pulls aside General Dodonna to figure out berths for Han and Chewie, for Luke and the droids. “They’re heroes of the Rebellion,” she says. “They deserve better than the communal bunks.”

“Very well, your highness,” says Dodonna, although he doesn’t look happy about it. “I can’t promise they’ll be very good. But we have two last rooms out on the outskirts, up in the trees.”

Leia cracks a smile. “That’ll entertain Luke. Did you know, he’s really from Tatooine?"

“That explains the accent.”

“And the general wide-eyed amazement at everything, yeah,” Leia mutters, and clears her throat. “If those are the last two rooms, I guess there’s not a third one left for me? I was hoping for at least a private sonic...”

Dodonna furrows his brow. “Your father’s suite is available.”

Leia’s heart drops.

Is she a bad person to say she’d forgotten? Is it possible to imagine that she’d forgotten?

“...right,” she says, and shakes her head once. “Um. Right.”

“Do you know where it is?” asks Dodonna. Leia thinks he’s maybe trying to be helpful.

“No,” she says, faintly. “No, I-- I know where it is.” She blinks, hard, and curls her fingers into fists until all she can feel is her nails biting into her palms. “I’m fine, general, thank you. I think I’ll head there now, actually.” Her voice sounds like a stranger’s in her ears. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Good night, princess,” says the general, and Leia can’t bring herself to care about the look of concern on his face.

-

Leia can’t stop thinking about the census.

It was an absurd thought to have as Tarkin first threatened her, and it remains an absurd thought to fixate on. What does it matter how many bakers there are (were) on Alderaan, as counted six months ago? What does it matter, now that all 263,841 of them are dead?

As she fumbles her way through the long corridors of the Yavin base, she keeps remembering census statistics. Average number of pets per household. Number of retirees. Percentage of adopted children.

Something wet hits her hand. She stares at it for a moment, uncomprehending, and then realizes what must be happening. She hasn’t cried for days.

She spends long minutes hesitating outside the door to her father’s quarters, unsure if she’ll survive walking inside. Unsure if she wants to survive it. Wondering if maybe she can just lie down on his blue rug, surrounded by the scent of his hair products, and go to sleep forever.

But this isn’t her father’s office on Coruscant. The blue rug isn’t here and her father spent a total of maybe three days on Yavin IV. She pushes open the door and is greeted by the absolute barest essentials of an empty, half-furnished Rebellion bunk.

Somehow, that manages to feel like dying too.

Dreamlike, she stumbles inside and shuts the door. Opens a drawer, then another, then them all, one after the other, scouring the room to find anything -- any sign that he ever existed.

There’s a comb on the counter of the fresher. Several blank datapads stacked next to the bed. Caf, on the desk, his favorite brand. She finds the photo of her mother under the pillow and has to sit down heavily, blinking back more tears at the sight of her face. She never found out how he managed to get a frame for every place he ever spent the night. Now, she supposes, she doesn’t get to ask.

That’s the last coherent thought she has for a while.

At least, she thinks hysterically to herself, curled up half-fetal on the bed that her father never slept in -- at least there’s something for her to comb out her braids with in the morning.

-

She goes to find Luke the next morning. He’s sitting at the cafeteria, picking at his plate with one hand and leaning his head on the other.

“Hey, Luke,” she says, coming around to sit next to him. “How was your night?”

“Fine, I guess.”

“Really?”

“No,” he admits. “Couldn’t sleep. I’ve never slept away from home before.”

“Oh, god,” says Leia. “Yeah, of course. Sorry, I didn’t even--” She bites her lip. “Did you wake up dizzy? I did, the first night I was off-world.”

Luke huffs a laugh, wetly. “Yeah, I did. And when I woke up, there was only one sun.”

“Tatooine has more than one sun?”

“Two.”

“Wow,” says Leia, unsure what else she can say.

He takes a deep breath. “I’m never going to see those suns again.”

Leia reaches out, hesitates, draws her hand back. “You’ll go back.”

“My aunt and uncle are dead,” Luke says, with devastating certainty. “There’s nothing left for me.” He shakes his head. “I spent my whole time there wishing I could leave. Now I don’t think I’ll ever be able to return.”

Leia’s heart aches for him. She folds her hands together and says, “Tell me about them.”

Anything to stop thinking about how she’ll never go back, either.

[megabadbunny]

I still have thoughts about Cinta, but I'm not ready to discuss them with the greater SW discourse because y'all know how fans can be, yeah?

BUT I have found comfort in imagining Vel, widowed and sad on Yavin, and Kleya, the mother of the Rebellion who thought she was on a suicide run and survived, finding solace in each other.

From this:

To this:

They'll be married within a year.

[megabadbunny]

An age-old question aroaces get both from the outside and from personal doubts is “how can being aroace be about anything other than a lack? sure you have platonic bonds but allo people can have those too”

I used to compare this to how black and white photography has its own beauty you can appreciate on its own terms, but I’m feeling that less these days. It’s more like being able to see the stars without light pollution.

The stars are still there, but if you’re caught up in society’s amatonormativity and suffocating relationship structures you may never experience their full beauty. City lights have their own beauty, but they can choke out things you’re starved for beyond them.

(also fits with the whole “I’m not aromantic but I believe in their beliefs” thing I love seeing from people making an effort to understand)

[megabadbunny]

[megabadbunny]

From the OP: "If you sit at a desk or stare at your phone all day, this is for you. Here's how to undo the damage: - Banded Chin Tucks - Strengthen your neck flexors and fight forward head posture - Banded Pull-Aparts - Target your rotator cuff and improve shoulder stability - Banded Abduction - Activate the midline of your scapula for better posture - Lateral Deltoid Raises - Build shoulder stability and control - Banded Up-and-Overs – Boost scapular mobility and range of motion These simple banded drills will help you stand taller, move better, and feel stronger - even after hours at a desk."

Some of these are the same or similar to the exercises my physical therapist taught me.

[megabadbunny]

when i try to be autisticly helpful but i just come across as cold and apathetic

[megabadbunny]

Hello bisexual community

[megabadbunny]

Kill each other.