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Right now, I could wish I had that recorder. It's not that big, and it's easy to take with you. Right now, it's raining, and I would love to record that sound. I think I will record lots of sounds with that recorder. Maybe even my cat. She doesn't meow that much, but she's got these sounds she makes.
But most of all, I want to sing little songs I just create there and then. I am not going for any Adele or Whitney Houston. That's not the singer I am. I always loved to record. Let's hope that recorder is easy to use.
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I feel like being creative. I feel bubbly inside, and I want to make music, I want to write, I want to paint with bright colours. This is a bit new to me to feel this way.
I have tried to get that digital recorder to work, but it's a bit complicated, and I have problems reading the manual. Well, maybe it's not so complicated, really, but with multiple track options and this and that... I just want to press record and start recording, so after some frustration with this, I now ordered a new recorder. Eh... I don't know if that was a good idea at all, really. And on this recorder, you can easily listen to your recordings because it has got a built-in speaker. I have missed that. But I really have nothing to record, not really. It's been years since I played the guitar that much and I haven't been singing either. I am so rusty when it comes to music. I was never that good. I always lacked courage and motivation to take it far. It's a pity really because I have a talent when it comes to music but you need more than just a talent.
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Words, endless words. Why not a kiss? Be close, just hug. No talking, just holding, sitting close together. All these non-verbal things speak louder than a thousand words.
Well, it's just another Friday night alone with my cat...
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Think none of me
as you leave
I know you are leaving
I can tell by the way the wind blows
it has been blowing for a while
I really don't care
I can't say I feel that much about anything
but I could wish I knew how you once loved me
or if you ever did
I am impossible and all over the place
I don't blame you for leaving
I don't know what I want
My feelings are hidden
I trample the mud
I trample the water
I get wet
and I don't care
I really don't care
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My friend and her boyfriend have been in London. :-) And they also went to Oxford.
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This home office job that I have as a software tester is very unpredictable. This year, it has been slow. In June I think I only worked for 2 hours the whole month. And now in July I have soon 40 hours with work. That's not near a full job at all, but I am pleased it has been so much better this month. The last couple of days have been intense, and I see that I have missed being really busy at work. Yeah, in those 40 hours I have also studied software testing curriculum. I get paid to study. Such luxury.
And I so dig this home office job. I work all hours of the day, sometimes late at night and sometimes Saturdays too. I like the freedom it gives but I could wish there were more hours. It has been slow this year. I, of course, also spend time at the library and help out there, but I don't get paid there, and I must say it is more motivating to get paid when you do a job. But there might be a paid job at the library as well... but it's a bit unclear when and if. I can only wait and see.
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I went to church today. They had a concert there. It was nice, just a short concert for free. They have had these concerts now during summer. Today, it was music with the organ and trumpet. I thought the organ player said before they started that one of the keywords for the concert was cheerfulness, but they played one sad tune after the other. It was Bach and some other dudes, and it all was in minor and I started looking for the coffin, thinking I must have mistaken the concert for a funeral. But the last piece they played was a real cheerful tune then, so they went out with a bang. But it was nice and this was the last concert this summer.
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And for those who are dying to know, NO, I don't sleep naked.
Was that all you wanted to know?
Was that all I was? A naked body in bed?
I could wish you could see me crying just about now. It's not a laughing matter.
Loneliness here I come. Have a drink with me!
Here's to nothing! Cheers!
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Can you appreciate beautiful art if it was created by someone evil?
I would like to answer no, but I think you can dislike the artist but still like his or her work. Their work is their work, and then how they are as people is a different matter. Well, that's what I think, anyway.
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Into the woods again, but this time we were 4 people. I don't think I want to go for walks there on my own, but it sure was a great place. I must come there more and explore. Lots of paths you could follow. We are celebrating my sister's birthday and all is going well. We have giggled so much.
My sister's husband has this app on his phone where he can use AI to create songs, and he made some songs about the birthday, and it caused a lot of laughter around the table. But it is horror to know that there will be AI bands and music on the radio and in the charts.
Soon, we will have tuna fish salad for dinner, and we already ate some cake and ice cream. I made a blueberry cake. It was very delicious, if I may say so myself. :-) Easy cake to make, and it tastes so good. It looks a bit off, but don't let that fool you.
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Today's scripture card
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Lola dances in the night
She is such a sight
Sometimes she tells me stories
where she leaves nothing out
She loves that blue-eyed, handsome cowboy
and she makes me want to be that man
all the things she would do to me
it will make a poor girl weep
Lola in the sun
Lola in the shade
She can make you smile
even on a rainy day
Make sure you treat her right
when you visit her lovely country
Make sure you hold her tight
and kiss her for me
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Strange days, for sure. I just got myself a wife. It's such a fun thing that's happening to me. :-) I just have to announce it to the world. No, I am not into women, really, but I have a wife here in tumblr land. I guess we have an open marriage where we can entertain men in our imaginative separate bedrooms.
I sometimes think I would rather share a house with a woman than a man. Nothing sexual between us then, but just share a house.
So now my darling Lola. It's out. We got married in a fever. Hotter than a pepper sprout. LOL I don't think any of us are into marriage but hey... she is my wife. And I couldn't be more happy.
She showers me with kindness and care. She is hot and I sometimes feel like the moon, cooling it all down. She makes me want to be the best that I can and she makes me see that I am good enough just the way I am. But she makes me want to go the extra mile... just because that's what love does to you.
Cheers to love and kindness!
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Everything is wrong today. I just made a tuna fish salad, and I didn't quite get the seasoning right. I guess my sister can help me a bit with that, then. I am preparing for a birthday celebration, and my mood is below the floor. I just want to scream and shout. I think I might be a bit depressed, actually, and that sucks big time.
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I can let you go
I need to let you go
but I will look for you
among the trees
I will ask the wind about you
I will look for you
in the music
I will ask the ocean about you
when the moon rises
I will whisper your name
maybe you can hear me calling?
If not, it’s alright
It’s all alright, you know
You just fly away
and I sit here watching
how your wings create
all those vibrant waves
all those lovely waves
across the universe
You just fly away
like a bird
like a song
like an echo from the mountain top
Create circles in the sand
I will count the stars for you
I will keep a seat for you
next to mine
Go now, just go
don’t look back
travel light
guard your heart
let love find you
let the sun guide you
I will pray for you
wish you well
go now, just go
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I think I must have misunderstood a great deal... I don't quite know what's going on. I find a meaning where there is none, and then I miss a meaning where there is one. I withdraw into my bubble and it's a bit strange I am not homeless.
Who is looking after me? It should be myself, but I left the steering wheel a while back. I just didn't want to be a part of whatever I was in, and I just dropped the ball. I was depressed then. Nothing made sense. But you must not quit... that's not the way to go. And the way back is so long and hard.
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