minibinnie2 - Tumblr blog

[minibinnie2]

Well guess what.. im not allowed to do hard labor for the time being because i have two issues with my spine and one may need me to do surgery to fix 😭 that also told me i may need to QUIT MY JOB. I WORK IN DOGGY DAYCARE I LOVE ALL MY DOGS. Im so sad rn :( they said its too much labor and im not suppose to squat often as well as avoid lifting heavy things 😵‍💫

[minibinnie2]

Im back happy new year! Alot happened at the end of the year (car crash, sickness, and family stuff) so i neglected my account and my body but i know this year i will be skinnier and happier!

[minibinnie2]

My weight is still the same but my collar bones feel really defined today so im super happy about that! I touched them and was shocked by how prominent and strong they felt

[minibinnie2]

Gained 5 pounds so i purged and im going to start a fast 👍🏻 i refuse to let myself go

[minibinnie2]

imagine that one day, where you look at the scale and cry.

not from sadness, but from happiness.

when you finally reach your ugw.

[minibinnie2]

[minibinnie2]

I hate admit it but I’ve been in a plateau for a few months now and ive slowly gone insane over it 🥲 I always end up eating the second i drop any weight i keep staying around 177-172 and i want to cry 🥲 instead though im going to start a new fast and workout more 💪🏻 if anyone has any tips please feel free to tell me!!

[minibinnie2]

Im so tired. Im so fucking tired of this body. I need the change but i keep self sabotaging myself. If i keep doing this im going to end up at my highest weight again. I cant do that, yet the self harm side of me likes to make me suffer. I don’t eat so i can feel the pain and hunger then eat when i accomplish a goal so i can just suffer more mentally.

[minibinnie2]

Officially lost 40 pounds :D alot more to go

[minibinnie2]

Losing some weight again finally :D i was so tired of being stuck at 190-193 i was going crazy 🥲 i started purging again and smoking to suppress my appetite. (I use to smoke anyways)

[minibinnie2]

im so tired of not losing weight, or simply maintaining. i wanna drop a shocking amount of weight and be skinnier than i've ever been in my life. i will get there. i refuse to accept anything less. ive wanted this for too long to give up now

[minibinnie2]

Ate at 1,500 cals for 2 days and my weight finally dropped again :)

[minibinnie2]

Why am i gaining i havent eaten over 1,000 calories in over a week 🧍🏼‍♀️ frustrating

[minibinnie2]

do it for yourself, my sweet. i know it's hard to stay on track, but don't waste the progress you've had. think of how happy you were every time you saw the results of your hard work. you're tired of hating yourself, aren't you? start doing the work now, even if you have to force yourself to get up, and your future self will thank you.

[minibinnie2]

It’s scary how easy it is to lose your progress

[minibinnie2]

Ive lost this weight before and i feel like shit knowing that i could of been skinny if i just stuck to it. My lw ever was still fucking fat but at least its better than being obese. My lowest was 165 and i thought i was so fat then… i mean i was but compared to now i just want to go back to that weight 🥲

[minibinnie2]

Meanspo for myself

You know what? Fuck you. You keep saying you want to try, you want to be better, but you cannot be bothered to make an effort. You hypocrite.

And the excuses- oh! Please. No, yeah, sure, "I'm only eating because I'm with other people", and "I'm only eating because I don't want them to find out I'm sick"- don't make me laugh. They'll NEVER worry about you being sick when you look more obese than underweight.

And be honest with yourself, you love it. You love stuffing your face with grease and garbage and chemicals. You say you don't. You do. You might love to pretend you're one of those ethereally sick people whose skin is made of paper and guts are thin as yarn, who don't need food and can only handle small nibbles of fruit, but in reality you're a worse pig than most "normal" people.

You try to control yourself. You can't.

You try to cut out food. You can't.

You try to be skinny. Well, you can't.

Just accept it. You will always be a pathetic, useless, unworthy, fat, gross animal, and any attempt to become more than that will inevitably fail.

So sure. Eat some more, little pig, it's not like you were trying to improve, anyway.