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I still cannot believe that I visited Kutna Hora and Rattay and Malesov and even met Jim and Michael at the KCD fan meeting... it feels so surreal

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Sorry you didn't stay home, are you?

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sam sleeps better in the cellar

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The Devil's Pack 2.0

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He cares so much about his well being...

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young Erik

Bonus 🔞 under cut

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Hello my lovelies,

Just an update about Hansry Kingdom. Tumblr has not got back to me, so I’m going to assume the community is sadly dead. 😔

But fear not! A sweetheart called @darkness-follows created Hansry Kingdom 2.0 like a boss and was sweet enough to ask me to admin again. So please, to the old lovely members, do join the new group!

It should hopefully feel like the same lovely, warm place!

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Thanks to the r/okbuddyfortuna sub on reddit for those masterpieces

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Do you ever think about how Hans probably acted a lot like a brat because that was the only time Hanush gave him any attention, and he figured negative attention is better than no attention?

Until along comes Henry who a) doesn't put up with his bratty tendencies and b) is probably one of the first people to give him genuine positive attention since (more than likely) Hans' parents died.

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Mods: Henry and Hans Edits

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Recently saw where someone had made an “I’m stuff” meme with Henry, Katherine and Zizka which got me thinking about Hansry ones with how I think various other characters would respond. I hope y’all laugh as much at these as I have 😂

Jadder would fully support (RIP 🪦 Adder)

Bonus Sam/John

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What happened to the Hansry kingdom community here on tumblr? Was it deleted ? I cannot find it or access it, like it's gone completely

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veni, vidi, v píči

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redraw of this beautiful screenshot that has been on my mind for days 😵‍💫

- screenshot by @/aernd66 on x.

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Hey, hansry fandom. Let me attempt to upsell some of you creators on alternative ways gay couples explore physical intimacy, then some reasons why anal penetration might not be the end-all, be-all form of lovemaking to incorporate into a NSFW scenario.

To start. Frotting (+frottage) is rubbing cocks, or a cock against a different part of their partner’s of the body, for stimulation. This is the go-to technique for many gays who find the experience to be more emotional and less uncomfortable or tedious than penetrative sex.  In terms of lovemaking, it’s extremely versatile: it can be slow and intimate, rushed and desperate, or rough and carnal. For example, for two new lovers who have recently connected due to their close bond and not necessarily physical attraction, frotting allows for face-to-face positioning. This enables eye contact and kissing to help incite the arousal that stems from their emotional connection. Conversely, suppose you’re writing a scene of a noble and a commoner who are just frantic with raw need for each other during their honeymoon phase, or are ducking into a room in a quiet part of a castle but have to be quick about it. In that case, bending a lover over a table and rutting over his hole from behind can bring pleasure to both without the preparation or pain that comes with fucking. The anus itself is pretty sensitive, and even if a guy doesn't like getting mounted, the friction over his hole can feel good. Frotting can also be used to show appreciation for other parts of the body one’s partner finds alluring: chest, hips, face, ass, and abdominal frottage are common choices. Intercrural sex is a term for frottage that typically means between the thighs specifically. Frotting, like most forms of intercourse, benefits from lubrication so the pressure and friction can be better enjoyed, but isn’t always needed. 

Handjobs can serve in almost every scenario, from casual encounters to impassioned lovemaking. The hand is an incredibly sensitive and adept tool for feeling - and delivering - physical responses in the body of another. Hands also have a lot of character that can convey the essence of the person. The rough callouses and burn scars earned throughout a youth spent working with the blistering heat of a forge and dangerous tools of the blacksmith’s trade are going to result in a very different touch than that which comes from a pair of hands that had proper leather gloves for protection as a young knight drilled in the art of combat and bowmanship. Palms sliding over skin to explore the planes of the body, following the curves and flexing of worked muscles, and curious fingers carding through a lover’s hair to trace nails over the sensitive scalp, or invade a private, personal space that a man’s lover will only allow him to experience are just some of the romantic expressions that can occur before even touching his dick. If the couple is very sexually active - say, perhaps needing to accommodate an exceptionally horny lordling - handies can be a solution for multiple encounters in a day, or if the time/place isn’t convenient for something more involved.     

(And this is where we remember that, as Christians living in medieval Bohemia, Hans and Henry almost certainly wouldn’t have been circumcised. For some reason, North American-based fandom gets really weird about foreskin?? Anyway.)

Mutual masturbation is infrequently seen in fanworks because it’s misunderstood as not being as romantic or involved as physical touch between partners. Not so. In this scenario, the lovers stimulate themselves in tandem with each other. This approach definitely has its appeals and uses since it allows men to have greater control over their own sexual experience. It’s helpful if one or both partners are anxious or unsure about how to touch another man and need to “ease into things”. There are many anecdotes of men discovering their same-sex attraction by watching them masturbate, then taking the next step of gratifying themselves in proximity to other men to develop their understanding of their orientation. So, for two knights raised in a deeply religious culture that is hostile towards homosexuality to the point of execution and condemning the eternal soul over it, masturbating in the presence of one another could be a middle ground they use while overcoming their learned fear of that social violation. Masturbating in the presence of a lover can also be a pragmatic solution if a partner is oversensitive or easily overstimulated. Some guys’ dicks demand a very delicate or particular touch or they go soft fast (sidenote: this also applies to the balls, to the point where being touched there can kill the man’s arousal outright). By masturbating, a man can control how he’s touched to keep it enjoyable or prevent himself from finishing too quickly. The arousal can be shared with a partner who becomes turned on by watching his lover in pleasure just from thinking about him, and in turn, he can offer words and moans of love/lust to tip the other over.  

Oral. Obviously. I won’t go into the merits of oral pleasure since fandom is well acquainted with the practice and concept, and it’s almost core to the gay experience. It's a labor of love, and it requires skill. That makes it a very attractive option if the goal is to spoil a partner and focus on his pleasure. Still, not everyone enjoys giving or receiving oral sex, and the fact is that sometimes couples aren’t physically suited for it. The recipient might have a hard time being stimulated enough to orgasm to oral even with a partner who’s really good at it, or a cock may be too big for a man to successfully suck off, or he has to use his hand too. Oral can be a concluding act, or it can be foreplay before finishing up by another means. In terms of delivery, it’s a method that doesn’t require much prep since saliva provides the lubrication and the tongue does the work. The musky scent of a man’s lover that is its most powerful beneath the hips can be attractive to him. That said, nobody cares to suck on an unwashed dick that’s been in the same pair of brais for the past week. For plots about two young bucks using an extended hunting trip as an excuse to get away from prying eyes for a while, some consideration should be made if they've been out in the woods for a few days.

So that brings us to the object of fandom’s fixation, which is good ol’ fashioned sodomy. And I’m not against depicting the act of men fucking, far from it. Big fan, actually. But fandom usually gets it wrong. Thanks to porn and raunchy TV, fucking guys got the same treatment as fucking women where there’s this collective misconception that if done “right”, all that’s needed is for the receiving partner to get plowed stupid, and then both will cum in unison in this blissful magical moment of physical and emotional harmony. It’s bullshit.

Just like women often can’t get off from being split by dick alone (and the urban myth implying that’s what happens for everyone having caused multitudes to feel shame or embarrassment for not being able to get off from unreciprocating partners), guys often don’t either. Women usually need their clit stimulated; guys often need more, too. For male or female bottoms, the same issues arise. A man’s lover might have a dick that’s too big and causes him pain. Look, smut writers, often there’s just no amount of lube or stretching prep or quiet murmurs of “Breathe. Relax, my love~” that will make a cock fit comfortably in a hole. And though it’s nothing to be ashamed about, sometimes the inserted cock is too short or narrow for a man to physically arouse his partner from penetration alone. Fact of life. There’s yet another component to male anatomy: dick shape and bend. The man’s prostate is located to the fore of his rectum. It’s the pressure and motion against the prostate that causes stimulation; if his partner’s dick is curved (which they often are, not everyone has perfectly shaped, big cocks), it may be in such a way that certain positions are more pleasurable to the recipient than others. Due to the downward bend of his partner’s a cock, a bottom might get stars behind his eyes for being railed from behind, but almost nothing from a missionary pose.

A commonly cited reason why gay men don’t care for or refuse to engage in anal isn’t because it causes pain, but because the motion of a mass passing through the rectum is biologically associated with taking a shit. The sensation of something moving in the ass is understandably awkward and unsexy to a lot of guys because it feels foremost like dropping a log, and any stimulation they might get from the dicking down isn’t worth the discomfort. Meanwhile, because the prostate isn’t some guaranteed g-spot button you just have to hit for perfect results, other dudes physically get nothing from the experience at all. Even a great fucking may just go nowhere for him. Now, there are plenty of dudes in this category who will still bottom for their partner regardless. The experience and feeling of his lover getting off to and inside of him can be a big turn-on, even if it’s not physically exciting for the bottom. So, he might spread cheeks for his lover as a service, then get finished off in a different way afterward. Or they may swap, and he fucks his partner back. Even if the bottom does find being fucked enjoyable, again, it’s very common that they don’t finish at the same time. A top may have to keep banging a fucked-out partner for a while after, or a bottom may need some extra attention to wrap up. Even so, it doesn’t make the lovemaking less special either way.

Finally, yes, anal requires some prep unless you're willing to gamble on 1) mild to severe rectal trauma and bleeding, and 2) actually shitting on your partner. Not a deal-killer for all couples who may be caught up in the thrill of the moment, hey, but generally speaking, most gays take precautions to minimize the likelihood of both. And bless, while there are some bottoms out there who can rawdog a freaking horse on nothing more than a hocked loogie for lube and Hail Mary, for most there’s a mental checklist for taking cock starting with whether or not he needs to go take a dump to clean himself out. This would then be followed by outward cleanliness (no bidets or toilet paper in 1302 Bohemia, remember), followed by lubrication, followed by insertion and repositioning. The idea of power bottom climbing astride his man to sit on his dick in one easy motion and ride him off into the sunset is a lot tougher to pull off in practice than it is in theory. And cocks slipping out of holes during the frantic breeding like rabbits, breaking the momentum and causing either amused chuckles or frustrated grunts? More common than anyone wants to admit. And the cum that goes in has to come out sooner or later. A big load will gradually leak out, and the feeling of anal seepage throughout the day isn’t on everybody’s kink list. Pulling out to finish spares a mess and discomfort.

Fucking can be hot, but there’s also an overprioritization on it fandom spaces as the most intimate form of sexual expression between a couple of men. There are so many ways for two guys to be physically romantic and fun and sexy with each other that aren’t somehow less meaningful or “real” than anal.  And if it has to be anal or nothing, okay! Godspeed, but please let go of this idea that it’s only worthwhile if it’s by-the-book and adheres to the notion that lovers should neatly finish in perfect time and then be done with each other; that neither man should need to ever trouble their partner for a little extra care or attention to fulfill his needs, like not blowing on queue means somebody screwed it up. Sex and love should be a shared experience, not a formulaic and identical one.

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