my-kaylah

[my-kaylah]

this is the one that gets me 😭

The stuggles of being a writer.

A shame that I have to actually finish my book before I get to read it. I enjoy writing it just as much but I am looking forward to finishing my first book and getting to read through it, even if I do know what's going to happen.

[my-kaylah]

oop this is an interesting one 👀

the demon that cursed you with infertility and the fey that you promised your firstborn are having a legal battle.

[my-kaylah]

"How do you write such realistic dialogue-" I TALK TO MYSELF. I TALK TO MYSELF AND I PRETEND I AM THE ONE SAYING THE LINE. LIKE SANITY IS SLOWLY SLIPPING FROM BETWEEN MY FINGERS WITH EVERY MEASLY WORD THEY TYPE OUT. THAT IS HOW.

[my-kaylah]

i’ve been on a creative roll

[my-kaylah]

I think about this a lot, so I want to let people in on a little thing I do: I give the story to the world. You could make it a story prompt! I personally tell my friends and hope they bring something similar to life (and then use that to motivate me to start my own story. Works a whopping third of the time)!

I am someone who is big on integrity. This extends to all areas in my life, especially my writing world—even when I was committed to school. I would sometimes say I “write” papers for people… in reality, it was me helping them write it. I would send resources and research leads; I would sit with them on a Google Doc; a lot of them times I would offer suggestions or straight up edit the entire paper! If I am your friend, I would be doing such a disservice doing the work for you because in the end… what was truly accomplished beyond academic dishonesty??

In turn, the creative field I hold to a much stricter standard. Theft is inexcusable. There is no need to steal creativity when… you can simply use it to inspire you. Some of my favorite pieces I’ve personally made have been inspired while consuming someone else’s content.

When those annoying “how to write better!!!” blogs tell you to read as the first or last thing on their list… they’re not wrong. I consume so much more content than I create; most of my creator friends do too if I think about it. There are periods where—instead of writing—I’m reading a WIP, commenting on the story, talking to the artist (this is how I make friends, I really just be wanting to talk to the person behind the art because the two are inseparable).

Creating without consuming would be counter productive. If you’re familiar with the concept of the ecochamber—this is how they’re made. Think of that little input-output chart they kept tryna teach us in math. With no creative input… are you really going to enjoy the creative process and what you produce from it?

And it doesn’t even have to be reading! You can watch youtube channels; lurk through reddit subs; read twitter threads; content is whatever you consume on a daily basis. It’s the things you choose to engage with.

[my-kaylah]

(i meant to reblog this to my other account oops)

Okay but the way i’m about to be on FP… AND THEY HAVE AN APP NOW?!!! Oh yeah we bringing this bad boy back to life (in my world)

[my-kaylah]

Okay but the way i’m about to be on FP… AND THEY HAVE AN APP NOW?!!! Oh yeah we bringing this bad boy back to life (in my world)

[my-kaylah]

okay because like?? was there even really a plot… I’d would settle for a point if there was one—but if you like it, I love it

it just be like that I guess

[my-kaylah]

me with calculus. never took a calc class, not even pre-cal [and i have no intentions of continuing my “formal” education oops]

don’t get me started on my GRAMMAR (and lack of syntax and general semantics and)?!

[my-kaylah]

If you see/enjoy it? Thanks for giving it a read, Dear Reader

I write for myself, the little word goblin in my head, and my three tumblr followers

[my-kaylah]

I think life is at its best when you've got enough free time at your leisure to just have random shit happen to you, because you had the time to pause and look around you, and stop to see what this is all about if and when something does seem odd.

The midsummer holiday is this weekend, so I needed to go get all my friends their birthday presents. As it was a nice day and we needed to have our daily walk anyhow, me and my boyfriend decided to head to the shops on foot. The way there was uneventful, but halfway on our way home, we noticed a cyclist crossing the road with a little dog running at the bike's heel, and remarked to each other what an irresponsible way that is to keep a dog - not even on a leash!

But then the little dog halted at the sight of us, and the cyclist went on without even noticing that the dog was left behind. That's when we put together that the dog wasn't even with this guy, but all on its own, wagging its tail and looking right to us. A little cream-coloured poodle, with an apricot colour patch along its spine. A well-groomed, healthy and happy-looking puppy with a collar round its neck - it didn't look lost or scared at all, but like it was having an excellent time, playing unleashed and unsupervised in traffic.

We tried to lure the pup to us, with little success, but since it was clearly not scared of strangers, I figured it's best not to spook it by suddenly grabbing it unless I was 100% sure it wouldn't get away. And as I approached the dog, it ran off back the way it came, up a road on a hill, glancing behind itself as dogs do when they want you to follow, and it halted on the top of the hill.

But by the time we got to the spot where the dog had been, it had disappeared somewhere in the greenery shading the road. So instead of playing cotton-eye-joe - where did you come from, where did you go? - we decided to stop and ask someone nearby where the dog might have come from, to let the owners know that it had been spotted around here. We picked the first house to the left. There was a man building something at the end of the yard, and I was the one who addressed him there.

"Uh, sir? Mister?"

"Huh?"

"Do you happen to know who around here might have a little cream-coloured poodle?"

"Uh, we do?"

"Well it was running down the road in traffic just now. Came back this way, though."

"God fucking damn it."

So the man called his wife who came out with a leash, and the two explained that this isn't the first time the sweet little bastrd had managed to escape - as a matter of fact he had currently been building a proper kennel on their yard, to have something more escape proof than their garden fence. The dog showed up again as the owners called, but didn't want to be caught. Eventually it wandered close enough to me to be snatched by the collar - and even then didn't seem scared to be seized by a stranger, only disappointed that Unsupervised Unleashed Happy Fun Time was over.

The owners thanked us profusedly, and the man went back inside to fetch something, handing us an ice cold bottle of sparkling wine for us for our troubles. Which is now in our fridge. And I guess the next quest is figuring out what we're going to do with that, since neither of us drinks alcohol.

[my-kaylah]

𝙱𝚞𝚛𝚍𝚎𝚗 𝚘𝚏 𝙰𝚕𝚙𝚑𝚊𝚜

The Prologue

At one point, The Unite Pack of Weres was a strong network of different communities, shunned by The Supertypical community that drove them from society.

There are many species that made up the Were Union, but one subset in particular was persecuted relentlessly by Them.

The aerial Were species were more secluded, and historically nested far away from the Supertypical, building nestled communities in places where They couldn’t build their colonies. Those of an aquatic varieties had similar habits.

Canine species—specially the Werewolves—were accessible targets. So intertwine are their histories, there are species of Werewolves whose shifting evolved to coincided with the Lunar cycle. They were able to assimilate and (semi)-safely integrate into Supertypical Nations.

There are so many who have such rich and diverse culture, but our story follows a particular subset of the Werewolf community that was too far removed to ever assimilate, but was more like the ones they hated more than they realized.

This is the story of the Alpha Tribe.

And I just killed my Alpha husband.

[my-kaylah]

I’ve done this and it’s lead to wonderful essays, poems, and concepts that I use throughout my other creative projects!

Going to try out a new writing tactic, see where it takes me. I’ve been struggling to write because I can’t set aside enough time to be confident in finishing a scene so I’m just going to… not do that. Giving myself permission to write bits and pieces at a time, let’s see how that goes!

[my-kaylah]

this dialogue is everything i didn’t know i needed

“God, Charlotte.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. His pacing continued erratically. “You make it hard. Sometimes … you make it hard to be your husband.”

[Protolith Chapter 11] "Know that I love you through and through. You live in my thoughts, in my dreams, and in my nightmares. I think perhaps you are in my very bones. I am forever yours." — Not her husband

[Protolith Chapter 14]

[my-kaylah]

to my Dear Reader,

I want to take a second to have a genuine moment with you, as a person, but through my art.

So many have this idea that writing is something you have to do alone. I don’t agree with that. I’ve never written alone. Even if/when I do the act itself in solitude; I always chatted with people, I was surrounded by friends and family; my art reflects how I feel at any given moment. When I read things I wrote 15+ years ago, I can remember the impactful moments and interactions that really helped shape that era. So when I’m around my support system and I feel good? I make art. When I’m stuck in my head, self-isolating from that support system?? Art is how I reach out and ask for help [and as you know me, that’ll make more sense].

Even when I went through a phase of my life where I wasn’t “writing” I was always being creative or an active audience member. So if I wasn’t writing, I was listening to music or playing instruments; practicing calligraphy; reading books; watching new shows and movies. Content is art, and the internet is so integral to this new budding society [and a big part of my personality].

So they—being the many, the few, the minority, or even just you— may be asking… Why are you even doing this? If you even get this far enough to question me about that, you get a point [you might just be the point]. You inspire a part of me to share! It’s not to prove a point, it’s because you ask such good questions. That inspires ideas in me.

I am turning 25 in July and I’m in a unique generational position; I grew up online—again, a big part of my personality—but I’m a student at heart, with the soul of an artist, and the makings of what is most likely undiagnosed-slash-unmedicated adhd … I feel like I had a point in there somewhere, but I digress.

I believe that, culturally, we’re moving past the academic restraints and restrictions that have stifled creativity. I don’t subscribe to “academic” and “proper” grammar because it’s boring… Both to read and to write. At this point it actively excludes brilliant artists who—on average—don’t have access to the same resources or even quality of material [I might be projecting, whatever. I get told my grammar is horrible all the time… but did you have fun reading it???? Exactly].

On paper, it doesn’t seem like I have the “qualities” and “capabilities” to be hired on. One might argue, I don’t have the experience. By whose standards? Since I could hold a pen long, I have written whatever half-thought-out-not-very-original-thought I had based on whatever new concept I encountered. Soon, those concepts became the influences and a part of my writing style. In a way, reading was a way to safely explore the world, and writing was how I processed what I learned. It would later be the tool I used to express myself to the world.

I started telling stories before I could write… or even speak properly, some aspects won’t change [read: I will never stop talking tbh]. I always give the concrete age 7 as a point of reference for how long I’ve been writing. I always had someone to tell a story to; I'm now the oldest of about 8 kids [give or take a parent or two]. I’ve always written for an audience, even if the audience was myself.

I’ve lived the life of a “trendsetter” for my family, siblings, friends, and generally I’ve always been a source of inspiration for strangers who meet me, too. I naturally network and have a support system of artists from all over the world, from different artistic eras of my life, who deserve a platform to showcase how brilliant they truly are. And all I do is talk too much.

I will be taking the world by storm, and have had 25 years of essentially being a genuine artist as my experience. That’s hard to capture on a resume. Imagine what I can do with you guys, as a 25 year old with 18+ years of living artistically and naturally inspiring others to do so. I may not have the “real life experience” you’re looking for, but wouldn’t you rather mold generational talent into a disciplined force of humanity?

When you meet me? You’ll invest in me. How could you not when, after our initial conversation when you’re already thinking about the ways you could utilize my talent…

You’d be creating art like you’ve never had before… and the only thing you have to do differently? You will create art more purposefully, and will want to hold yourself accountable to doing things with and of quality. I won’t tell you what to do, and I will never take creative licenses away from you; but I can lead and guide through example. If this little essay doesn’t show you that I’m everything you didn’t realize you wanted, and everything you instinctually need. What you describe as a “job”, I do already in my daily life for myself and my friends. Difference is? I just don’t have the platform I need to have the impact I want… yet.

Again, you might not know me (yet), but my ability to connect with people is ingenious. If you make it this far in my baby cover letter… you might just agree. You might just find yourself wanting to take a gamble on me. And if not? That’s okay, cause someone will. And when we meet down the line, I can’t promise not to tell the story of how you guys fumbled me… but what was that about digressing?

[Fun fact: I write one of these specifically catered to each job I have enough faith to want. I believe we could do some groundbreaking work, and revolutionize the industry if you add me to your team. Wait until you get me in person and hear my ideas!]

Honestly, if you ever take anything from what I write/say/do: take away whatever emotions I make you feel when you connect with me and my art. Run with it. It might truly be a reflection of how I feel about you. How you interact with my art is honestly more telling than anything else [how anyone treats “amateur” art that isn’t seen as “classically/traditionally trained in the arts]. Tried and tested theory, worked all my life 10/10 works. The more genuinely you interact with my art, you interact with me. I'm enough of a walking paradox to admit it and be human about it. I don’t have the mastery of my arts yet, but at least I’m learning to exercise and stretching those muscles [read: rights].

And dear reader, duh you! The one who always gets to the end (or even reads the entire thing for extra brownie points)… you know the rest lol

[my-kaylah]

The Alpha’s Hierarchy

[Prologue]

I invite you to a world, not dissimilar from the one you currently inhabit. There are people who exist, but if you’re confused by what I’m talking about—you might be one of Them.

In this world (while made up of so many cultures and their subcultures) people can be categorized in one of two ways; the Nueronatural and the Supertypicals. You can get into the politics and semantics all you want, but there are a few things that remain constant in this world: If you are one of us? They’ll hunt you.

In their world, we don’t exist… we’re just a “fantasy” to them. They’ll speak in parables, and rewrite history to reimagine themselves as humane, just, and moral people all while demonizing our cultures, reducing us to fictions. They slaughter our young, enslave our strongest and tempt the weakest among our ranks.

First Quarter

When you think about it, I was fortunate to be born in a Nueronatural society that fostered my relationship to my roots. Even more privileged was I to be borne well, bred better, and what many Nueronatural communities would consider an Alpha of my species. And not to brag, but when I access my roots, and the form that could be mistaken for a Supertypical reverts to its natural state of being.

That’s right, I’m her. The Alpha Female. Which actually means something in the Werewolf tribes and nations. Not only that, I am an Alpha Female of the Tribe Alpha; shepherded by Adelulf (12th of his name, and eldest brother of the Ninth Generation of the Eldest Family of Tribe Alpha).

There are only few Alpha Females of my generation, but none as deserving as I—that’s not to say I’m better than my peers, I am just the heiress of a legacy that bears respect. My family isn’t of the Eldest Family Dynasty, but have long standings as the third pack to join the Alpha Tribe. My original father left his she-sire’s pack. He escaped his mother tribe, daring to go against the matriarchy to lead his family to grandeur.

The makings of Alpha Tribes are unique in that we are one of the only Werewolf tribes that is lead by the patriarchs. Where most tribes are traditionally lead by “Alpha” females—who wouldn’t even be considered Omega by our standards—Alpha Tribe was the first to diverge from the status quo.

Through these Shepherds, our tribes strength flourish, and many packs joined us. Soon, other tribes followed suit; though even their “Alphas” couldn’t even compare to our Beta men. In fact, our tribe’s hierarchy doesn’t allow our men to demean themselves. What our Beta men lack in intelligence they more than make up in strength and integrity.

I don’t interact much with men of the Beta variety. They do better with women of lower status�� the loud, crass, masculine women who would rather debase themselves with internalized misandry. Women with no respect for their fathers, brothers; these are the type of women who birth and breed omegas. Their sons are either smart enough to leave to humbler pastures or be eaten by the tribe (metaphorically, of course, we’re not cannibals).

I don’t have to worry about my sons—any of my litters. They will be noble stock. For the first time in Alpha Tribe, the Behemoth Pack will be marrying into the Eldest Family.

I am set to be First Mate of Adolwalf, third of his name, and youngest brother of the Tenth Generation of the Eldest Family of the Alpha Tribe. If I came into heat sooner, I probably could have snagged the third brother, maybe even the first. But honestly being anything but the First Mate is bellow my station It’s preferably I’m the only person he’ll want to mate, but an Alpha man is still a man, my sire loves to say.

I am so excited! We get married durning the next New Moon and we’ve just entered the First Quarter—so soon! My she-sire always told me that writing is a good way to let it all out so I can maintain my composure. Honestly, she may have been onto something.

I don’t usually have so much to say, but I felt like I deserved a proper introduction. My name is Merela, eldest (and only) daughter of the Third Eldest Family of Alpha Tribe.

I’m going to be an Alpha’s Wife. Could you think of a higher honor?

[my-kaylah]

never mind apparently my post never queued so i will just… rewrite it

any advice for FINDING MY QUEUE ON THIS CURSED FRUIT PHONE