my-mind-is-afk-rn

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Sitting here drinking an energy drink I mixed myself, listening to Frédéric Chopin's Nocturn in E-Flat Major, Op. 9, No. 2, thinking about life and stuff

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That's some big talk for someone who just got his ass beat

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Hell yeah

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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Ok but why was Zinzolin so much harder to beat than the actual gym leader, he had two cryogonals on his team 😭

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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Man I love this battle theme sm

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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That's a sick line for just a grunt to be saying it

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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Oh. There's been a terrorism.

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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Bloody hell it's herobrine

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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..........how the hell did I just beat him first try

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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Thank you Drayden for switching out Arctruro for me when he was on low HP so I could continue listening to this banger theme

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

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LAST POKEMON!!!

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

[my-mind-is-afk-rn]

Fighting Drayden yippee (I'm finally making progress after like a year 💀)(but I caught two new pokemon!)

[my-mind-is-afk-rn]

Funnist thing was, I had been going back and forth for so long like "oh maybe I'm autistic, maybe I'm not autistic" and I could explain almost if not all of my symptoms by blaming them on something else I had, and my latest decision (that I did post about previously) was that I most likely wasn't autistic because I can understand people just fine, and I know intuitively how people think and how to respond to them in social situations and things like that, which I was so confident meant I was not autistic

And then so I'm watching Dungeon Meshi with all my 3 autistic siblings (I know 💀) and we're laughing together like "oh laios is autistic, oh kabru is autistic but like opposite of laios' autism where he knows everything about how people work because he's studied them and stuff, and kabru is mad cause he can't understand how laios thinks" and (hold on I'm getting there)

Several months later I have a big argument with my brother, and he's upset and I had mostly calmed down, and he's a really stubborn person (like most of my family members) and after the argument is "over" I think to myself how frustrating it is to interact with him when he's emotional like that because, and these are the exact words I thought, "it's not a disorder, it's just his personality, and I don't know what to do!"

And that was the moment that everything just kind of clicked, like. Oh. Oh I only understand people through my special interest in psychology.. I don't.. intuitively understand how to interact with people, I... I actually studied it. And I just intuitively understand psychology.

I'm not the type of autistic that's clueless in social situations, I'm the type of autistic that gets really fucking mad when they don't understand exactly how someone thinks and spends way too much time and effort studying them until they understand them enough to be satisfied. I'm literally Kabru.

Hey guys great news I finally figured out if I'm actually autistic or not (the answer is I probably am)(i am not diagnosed though)

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Hey guys great news I finally figured out if I'm actually autistic or not (the answer is I probably am)(i am not diagnosed though)

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Btw it may have been unclear, when I said "phase" I meant like, horse girl phase, cat phase, I'm my parent's favorite phase, not like the actual alter or system was a phase

Man thinking about old alters is kinda weird cause I'm sitting here like "oh I wonder what [x] would think of where I am now" and then I'm like. Oh wait, that's me. That's not some mystical spirit that was just in my life for 8 years of my childhood, that was a phase of mine that I had back in elementary/middle school, except I was having like 40 of them at once and they were all different, and now that we're fused together again, I remember every path of this life like it was the original, but at the same time I remember interactinf with... each other.. and..... now I just have like 40x the memories except I don't and.. uh... anyway what *would* [x] think of me now, well honestly i have NO idea because their life "ended" before I got a grasp of our sense of self... and that was the whole point of doing that..... and I keep forgetting that I was just... Like That for so long. Anyone get what I'm saying? (I need sleep)

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Man thinking about old alters is kinda weird cause I'm sitting here like "oh I wonder what [x] would think of where I am now" and then I'm like. Oh wait, that's me. That's not some mystical spirit that was just in my life for 8 years of my childhood, that was a phase of mine that I had back in elementary/middle school, except I was having like 40 of them at once and they were all different, and now that we're fused together again, I remember every path of this life like it was the original, but at the same time I remember interactinf with... each other.. and..... now I just have like 40x the memories except I don't and.. uh... anyway what *would* [x] think of me now, well honestly i have NO idea because their life "ended" before I got a grasp of our sense of self... and that was the whole point of doing that..... and I keep forgetting that I was just... Like That for so long. Anyone get what I'm saying? (I need sleep)