nagaytoe

[nagaytoe]

THE S+E DRAWN WITH CROWES BLOOD?!

...i love it

I FINALLY FINISHED THIS, I hope yall like this 🥺💞

[nagaytoe]

*insert korn noises here*

[nagaytoe]

Can you do reader who barely eats/doesn't eat at all?

And btw I love your writing💯

Anorexia

Sol/Crowe x Reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Requests: Open

I'm finally back from hibernation, woohoo! I will try to work on all the requests i have still sitting around, before working on my other drafts! (no promises thoug, my adhd will do what my adhd wants to do lmao)

TWs, Tags: Display and mentions of eating disorders, depression, mental health problems in general

IF YOU STRUGGLE WITH MENTAL HEALTH, PLEASE SEEK HELP. PEOPLE CARE FOR YOU AND LOVE YOU.

-

Your hands grazed your hips and sides, all the way up to your ribs. You exhaled and shook your head lightly, tearing your gaze from the mirror in front of you. A stinging feeling of disgust spread through your chest. 

Disgust towards your body, disgust towards your weight, disgust towards you. 

Tears have long stopped welling up in your eyes at the sight of you, but the feeling you got when you do only got worse. 

The pair of baggy jeans you wore had to be secured with a belt, otherwise they would slip right back to the ground, though the hoodie was long enough to cover that detail. Looking at the time, you realized you needed to get going, so you picked up your backpack from the ground, took your keys and left. You did not pack lunch, you did not need lunch, you did not deserve to eat. 

Pigs did not deserve to eat.

The moment you stepped outside, a shiver tore through your body. It was 17 degrees outside, was it not? Why were you so cold then, despite long clothes? Wrapping your arms around yourself, you tried to nuzzle further into the soft fabric of your hoodie. Luckily, the walk to school wasn't too long, but it still felt like torture with how much you were freezing.

“[____]!”

A deep voice called out to you from behind. Turning around, you spot your friend, Crowe, walking towards you. “Good morning!”

You managed to give him a hint of a smile, though it was a shadow of what it once was.

“Hey there.”, You greeted once he fell in step beside you, “How are you doing?”

Crowe’s gaze wandered towards yours and he flashed another bright smile. “I’m doing great, what about you?”

You nodded curtly in response and forced out a ‘good’, as not to worry him. Last thing you needed was one of your best friends knowing about any of your issues.

The rest of the walk was him talking, as well as asking, about the weekend and classes today and you giving short answers.

“I'll see you in history class then?”

Crowe asked, once the two of you reached the entrance of your university.

You responded with a nod, “Sure.”

With that, you took off to your first class of the day, applied arts. Opening the door, you walked all the way to the back of the class, right next to the window. You hated sitting elsewhere, feeling like all eyes were on you, studying you, judging you. You felt way safer sitting out of sight. The only eyes on you were Sol’s, and occasionally, the one’s of the teacher.

Resting your head on your fist, you turned your head to stare out the window, where you spotted two birds sitting on a tree branch. It almost looked like they were bickering. Mentally, you chuckled to yourself, but physically, your expression remained unchanged. 

One of the birds took off and flew away, the other one soon followed. That’s when you heard your name being called for the second time today. 

“Hey, [____], how are you doing?”

You turned your head to the side and spotted Sol sitting down on his seat, placing his messenger bag next to him on the floor.

Why the hell was everyone asking how you were doing? It was none of their goddamn business.

“I’m fine. What about you?”

He eyed you with suspicion, was your tone too harsh perhaps? 

Get a grip already.

“Fine as well. How was your weekend?”

You gave him the same, short answers you already gave Crowe. It was almost routine at this point. The same meaningless answers to the same meaningless questions.

Sol seemed to be wary of your behaviour, like he knew something was off, despite your best efforts to try and hide it.

‘Don’t you dare play psychiatrist.’, you thought to yourself.

You loved him dearly, you really did, but you need not burden him with your problems.

“Do you wanna spend lunch break with me and Hyugo on the rooftop?”

No way.

“Oh, I’m already occupied otherwise…”

He raised an eyebrow at your response. “With..?”

You gulped and quickly tried to think of an adequate response.

“Homework. The less to do at home, the better.”

He clicked his tongue and inhaled, almost as if trying to compose himself.

“You can do homework on the rooftop with us. No need to do it on your own somewhere on the school grounds.”

You hesitated, thinking of another way out of this predicament. You could not spend lunch with them, you just could not.

Before you could say anything, he quickly added, “I would really like you to spend the break with us. Please, [____].”

Sighing, you reluctantly nodded in agreement, to which he responded with a soft smile.

Just in that moment, the teacher entered and begun with the lesson.

-

You thought of every possible excuse to not spend lunch break with Sol and Hyugo, but could not come up with a plausible one that would not make them more any more worried than they already were. It was not like you did not want to spend time with them, you just could not let them know about your eating habits. 

Well, if you could even call it that. Was eating nothing even considered an eating habit? Not that it mattered, it was not any of their business, but knowing them, they wouldn’t let it rest once they found out. Especially Sol.

With a deep inhale, you pushed open the door to the rooftop, the sunlight blinding you momentarily. You found Sol and Hyugo sitting there already, their attention immediately turned towards you at the sound of the door closing. No one was allowed up here, naturally all of you were at least a little nervous about being caught.

“[____], good to see you!”

Hyugo greeted you with a bright smile.

What was he always smiling so much for?

“Great that you’re here, Sunny was already whining to me about how much he missed you.” 

Hyugo teased, nudging his best friend with his elbow.

The taller one of the duo rolled his eyes and bit out a response, “Shut it.” 

You sat down next to Sol and placed your backpack on your lap, rummaging through it to work on the homework you know did not exist. 

“What have you got for lunch, [____]?”

Freezing at Hyugo’s question, your mind worked at full capacity to come up with an immediate response.

“I already ate.”

Hyugo tilted his head to the side with furrowed brows.

“Break just started, how could you have already eaten something?”

For a second you considered jumping over the railing. That was the most stupid response you could have come up with.

Shrugging, your forced a smile and brushed off the topic, “It was a small snack. Not particularly hungry today.”

“You should eat properly. Here, have some of my lunch.” Sol offered and shoved his bento box into your direction.

“I can’t just eat your lunch, Sol. You need to eat properly as well.”

Rich, coming from you.

He stared at you and kept holding out his bento box for you to take.

You held eye contact with him for a few minutes, before hesitantly taking it from him.

You could just hold it for the time being and keep up conversation, perhaps then they would not notice you not eating anything.

“So, pray tell, how were your classes today so far?”

Hyugo immediately started talking, ranting about some annoying teacher he had to deal with today. However, Sol’s attention was not on his blue-haired friend at all.

It was on you.

“Why aren’t you eating anything?”

Sol’s words cut through the air like a knife and you felt like you were just punched in the gut.

“I told you, I’m not hungry.”

He sighed at that. 

“You’re ‘not hungry’ all the time. Whenever we spend lunch together you don’t eat anything. Do you really think we don’t notice?”

Growing irritated, you respond through gritted teeth, “Just drop it. I’m not hungry, what’s so wrong with that? You can’t force me to eat!” 

“What you are doing is unhealthy! We’re worried about you and if there is anything you need to talk about, just tell us, you know you can talk to us about anything.”

You would rather die than tell them about this.

“I told you to drop it.”

Sol shook his head in response.

“I care about you and your well-being and I am not gonna let you starve yourself.”

Hyugo watched the scene unfold, his eyes snapping back and forth between the two of you.

“It’s none of your goddamn business!” You snap and stand up abruptly, the bento box falling on the ground and it’s contents spilling all over the ground.

Sol’s brows furrowed and Hyugo’s jaw dropped in disbelief.

This was not how they knew you. This was not how you acted.

They must think you are a freak.

You stand there for a moment and stare at them, overwhelmed by your emotions, before turning around and trotting towards the door.

“[____]!”

One of them called out to you, though you couldn’t make out who exactly it was. Your own thoughts were too loud and drowning out everything around you.

Next thing you knew, you were down the stairs and on your way to the bathroom, but snapped out of your daze when you bumped into someone.

“[____], what happened?”

Looking up, you saw Crowe looking at you with concerned eyes as he placed his hands on your shoulders. 

Not him, too.

You brushed off his hands with your own and walk past him, causing his brows to furrow in confusion and to take ahold of your wrist.

“What’s wrong, [____]?”. he asked in that worried tone you hated so much. 

You did not want anyone to be worried about you.

“Leave me alone, Crowe.” Your voice was betraying you, you did not want to appear this fragile.

“I do not think I can.” 

You did not turn back to face him. You could not.

“[____]!”

Sol called out and stopped in his tracks behind Crowe. You couldn’t see it, but he stared at the Brunette with an intensity that would make anyone shudder.

“What happened?” Crowe now turned to ask Sol, who clicked his tongue in response.

“None of your business.”

Sighing, Crowe forced himself to keep his composure, for your sake.

“They are just as important to me as they are to you. So please, tell me what happened, because they won’t.”

Sol shrugged, “They must have their reasons not to tell you.”

This response irked Crowe even more.

“Well, if they were just walking away from you, then they must not want you involved either, no?”

Sol huffed, taking a step closer, “You little-”

“Stop.”, you croaked out.

You felt horrible. You were horrible, making the two most important people in your life fight like this, just because of you.

The two immediately stopped bickering and turned their attention back to you. They could kick themselves for how they were acting. How could they start fighting when you needed them the most?

“I think they aren’t eating properly.”, Sol eventually responded to Crowe’s initial question.

Choking back a sob, you tried to defend yourself. “I am.”

Sol shot down your poor defense immediately, “You really aren’t.”

Crowe inched closer, standing right next to you and placing his left hand on your right shoulder. 

“Please, if there’s anything we can do, if you need to talk, then please, talk to us.”

You shook your head, “I don’t wanna burden you with any of my sob stories. Not like it’s important anyways.”

“We already are worried, talking about it would at least help us understand what you are feeling right now.”

“I don’t-”, you cut yourself off with an involuntary sob, “I don’t need to talk about anything. There is nothing to talk about.”

You hated how much your voice was wavering, almost like it tried everything in it’s power to embarrass you.

“There is more than enough to talk about, I fear.”, Sol responded, coming up to your side.

As much as you tried to fight it, tears started streaming down your face. “Why can’t you just let me be?”

“Because we care about you. We don’t want to see you suffer like this.”, Crowe assured you.

Sol could not imagine anything more dreadful than to work together with Crowe. He alone should be the one making you happy. Though for now, he would have to bite back his own feelings, for yours were far more important. He still had all the time in the world to get rid of that pest.

“Your feelings aren’t a burden, [____]. It’s much more burdening to see you wither without knowing why.”

Another sob escaped your throat at Sol’s words. 

Why did they have to care so much?

Why could they not let you be?

“Why do you fight us so much? You aren’t a burden, we love and care for you. You’re our friend.” Crowe said and turned you around to face him.

You stared at up at him. You did not say anything.

All you did was take a step closer and let your head fall forward to rest on his chest, your arms hanging limply at your sides. Crowe’s hand rose to softly stroke the back of your head.

Sol was fuming next to you, his mind going haywire with all the ways he could kill Jericho Ichabod, despite his worry for you. Those thoughts quickly subsided, if just for a moment, the minute you took ahold of his hand. He brushed his thumb over the back of your hand in a comforting matter as the three of you stood there in silence in the middle of the deserted hallway.

These two did not see you the same way you saw yourself. They did not see the disgusting beast you saw every time you saw your own reflection. 

They saw a beautiful soul, a soul they fell deeply in love with.

And perhaps, just for a moment, you could let yourself breathe and bask in affection you doubted you deserved.

[nagaytoe]

Epic the musical + The kid at the back?

HELL YEAH!

[nagaytoe]

This man🥹

that’s so boyfriend coded of him

[nagaytoe]

My man (debating whether or not to write for him as well lol)

Patre0n | Bsky

[nagaytoe]

Blood/(Censored) Gore‼️

Alternative, more accurate version ↓↓↓

Original image ↓↓↓

[nagaytoe]

My fav nerd (and u can add 'i ❤️ metalheads' as well)

[nagaytoe]

. . .

[nagaytoe]

Real tho i walk into the bookstore and at least the entire YA shelf has the exact same plot in every book

AND THEY’RE FUCKING CORRECT

[nagaytoe]

He better come back in season 5 so we can habe two vampire edwards😼

i miss my boyfriend guys :(

[nagaytoe]

Cor Meum

(Latin) [noun] my Heart

Ć̷͚̇ŗ̷̧̨̡͍̺̤̠͎̱̬͙̥̝̤̆̈́̈͌́́̀̀̐̓̈́̉̈́̽͂́͐͋̓͛̔̈́̓̋͆̔̀͗̄̆̌́͂̕̚͘͠͝o̴̧̜̭͇̣̘̫̜͍͚͈̰̣͚͈͉͉̝͔͇̾̿̏͛͗̑̚͜͝͝ͅw̶̧̛͖̭͚͈̙̬̯̼̬̻͇̹͊̓̈́̔̋͆̊̆͛͜͠ͅ-̷̢̧̘̜͈̞̻̳̫̠̟̘̳̜̬̗̪͗̈́S̸̨̡̢̼̺̤̮̰͍̺̞̃̏̀̓̇͌͐̉̑͒̈́̃͂̈́̌͆̍̓͗͌̽͐͌̚͝͠͝ͅǫ̵̺̜̝̫͇̼͉̫̪̫͈̹͕̱̱̳̝̱͔̫͚̟̭͍̫̖̭̲̞̩̱͔͓̘̪̝̦̜͓̟͉̐̐́̊͂́̐̀̿͂͘̕͠l̷̈̈͂͆͋̑͒̈͑́̈́̇͆͂̈́̃̂̏̿̐͘̕͘͘��̡̧̨̧̰͔̪̳̪̼͉̥̹̩̞͎̘̣̱̦̞̳̙̲̤̣̹͔̦̣͚̞͉̗͉̝̰̝̟͉̼͓͖̝̀̊̃̏̉͜͜͜͝ͅX Reader

Word count: 2.8k

Requests: Open

TWs, Tags: Multilation, Murder, Guts, Vomiting, Delusion, Manipulation, Crowe and Reader are in an established relationship, Sol and Reader don't formally know each other

Pink heart garlands decorated the hallways, the faint scent of roses permeating the air, despite the amount of people here. Some students' lockers, once again including Geo’s, were filled to the brim with love letters. You couldn’t fathom why people made such a big deal of this day, treating it equally to far more important holidays.

Nonetheless, this year, you were not as unaffected by the Day of Love as you usually were but who was to blame for that? None other than Jericho Ichabod.

The two of you were together for almost half a year and it was by far the best time period of your life. You could not wish for a sweeter, more attentive boyfriend than him and you would be lying if you said you hadn’t imagined a future with him every now and then - like moving in together, getting married, adopting some animals.

“Are you even listening to me?” A feminine, smokey voice snapped you out of your thoughts and you looked over to the blonde girl next to you with wide eyes. Brtittney sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose with bright pink acrylic nails.

“Seriously? I’m trying to help you here, you know?”

It was true, you had asked Brittney to help you pick out a Valentine’s day present for your beloved Crowe, since you couldn’t settle for one single thing.

The presents were either too dull, too basic for someone like him, other ideas were way too personal and expensive for Valentine’s day and were better suited for his birthday.

Brittney and you pushed through the crowd of students as you were on your way to the cafeteria.

“Sorry, Brit, I just… I feel like such a bad partner for not immediately coming up with something fitting for him…” Your eyes were cast down to the floor as you sighed heavily. The girl next to you rolled her eyes and smiled at you, nudging your side with her elbow. “You are not a bad partner, seriously, I don’t think I have ever seen Crowe this happy. You could probably give him a random stone you picked up from the street and he’d treasure it like a diamond necklace.”

She wasn’t wrong, Crowe wasn’t the materialistic type by any means, but you still wanted to give him something meaningful.

“I was thinking about getting us a sun and moon necklace, but I’m not sure whether he will like it or not .”

The blonde woman sent a deadpan expression your way, as if to ask you if you were being serious.

Averting your gaze, you were left to admit that he would most likely like it a lot. He liked jewelry, he liked celestial bodies, there was no chance he wouldn’t love it, if you were being frank.

“The only challenge is how you’re gonna get that, though. I doubt any local shop has this exact piece of jewelry in store right now.”

Fiddling with your fingers, you thought about ways you could possibly obtain this present for him.

“I’m sure some shop has the charms I need, I can just make the necklace myself.”

Brittney nodded at you in agreement, before pushing open the door to the cafeteria.

-

After almost an hour of looking for the charms you needed, you finally managed to find the perfect ones. A simple, golden sun with a small, round gemstone right in the center of the charm for you and a silver crescent moon, an oval gemstone adorning the middle for Crowe. Getting them was a hassle, especially since the mall was filled to the brim with people frantically searching for Valentine’s day presents. However, getting something sweet for Crowe was worth enduring the suffocating crowd.

Once you arrived at your apartment, you immediately beelined towards your bedroom to get to work, shopping bag in tow. Sitting down on your soft bed, you carefully unpacked the pendants, along with two black leather cords to attach the charms to.

It reminded you of when you were younger, when times were easier. Back then, you made necklaces like these for fun, to give to your parents or friends as presents. To you, it always felt far more personal than store bought jewelry. Of course, now that you were grown-up people expect you to give them presents other than hand-made ones, but you knew Crowe would never judge you, especially not for pouring time and effort into making something for him.

Taking a look towards the clock attached to the wall right over your bedroom door, you noticed you had two hours left until Crowe would come over.

The two of you had decided to meet up at your place in the evening and spend the night together, especially since Valentine’s day was on a friday this year. Perhaps tonight you could take things to the next level in your relationship. It was not like neither of you wanted to have sex, but he was your first boyfriend and you did not want to rush things, a decision he was perfectly fine with. A rush of warmth spread through your body at the thought, causing you to feel giddy as you got to work.

Time ticked by, soft music played in the background which you put on right before you started creating the necklaces. Looking at the time, you noticed not even half an hour had passed and you were already finished, the sun necklace already hanging around your neck. You pondered for a moment and decided to watch your favorite show in the meantime, during your wait for Crowe. While you turned on your TV, your mind wandered back to the walk towards the mall. You couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched, constantly looking over your shoulder as you made your way towards your destination. It was a feeling that had accompanied you for quite some time now and since you’ve been with Crowe it has only gotten worse. You shook your head, trying to disperse the thought. Due to the lack of another explanation, you decided your imagination must be playing tricks on you. Eventually, you put on the show and decided to relax a little, longing to get rid of the familiar tickling feeling right behind your ribcage, the feeling of dread. Losing yourself in your favourite show seemed like a good way to escape your thoughts right now.

-

Your gaze wandered towards the clock and you noticed Crowe was running half an hour late already. Usually he was never late to anything, but whenever that was the case he informed the person waiting for him. Grabbing your phone, you opened his contact and called him.

It rang once.

Twice.

Three times and a few more after that until you were sent to his mailbox.

Worry started to settle deep in your stomach. What if something happened to him? You knew that this town wasn't the safest, danger lurked in every dark corner and especially with how dark it was outside during this time of the day, your fear was not unjustified.

Just as you went to try for another call, the doorbell rang. Heaving a sigh of relief, you sprang off the bed and rushed towards the door, not bothering to turn off the show.

“Hey, I was starting to-”

It was not Crowe standing in front of your door.

Red eyes locked with yours as you gazed up at the man in front of you in confusion.

“Can I help you?”

The man looked vaguely familiar, if you remember correctly you shared a class with him.

He nodded and smiled, although it looked strained, like he was forcing himself to keep his composure.

“May I come in?”

Just then you noticed the box in his hands, causing you to cock your head to the side as you eyed him up and down for a moment. Black dress shoes, dark green pants with a chain in a lighter shade attached to the waistband and a black shirt. Underneath, a green-black striped long sleeve peeked out, effectively covering his arms. Straight, shoulder-length black hair, some green streaks scattered across the strands, framed his pale face but the most intriguing feature were his piercing vermillion eyes.

“I’m expecting a visitor…” You rubbed your arm awkwardly, trying to ease the tension coursing through your body. What was it about this man that made you feel so on edge?

His eye twitched ever so slightly and the corner of his mouth quirked downwards a little. “Don’t worry, I’ll be gone before he is here.”

Shaking your head, you stood your ground. You didn’t know this man, nor did you know what his intentions were.

His smile dropped and his eyes narrowed as he stretched out his arms, offering the present for you to take.

“Will you at least take a look at what I brought you?”

You eyed the box suspiciously, taking it from his hands with hesitance evident in your movements.

“Come on,” he nudged you, an unsettling smile on his face once more. “Open it.”

The man almost seemed excited as you began to take the lid off the box. Your blood froze as you gazed upon the contents.

A heart.

Blood smeared all over and a note to top it off:

With this I ask your Love

Give into me, let yourself fall.

For when push comes to shove

You will be all mine, after all.

You dropped the box in shock, your hands coming up to clutch over your mouth as you looked at the man in horror, a crooked grin spread over his features.

“Do you like it? Did you notice the initials I carved into it? It was quite troublesome, muscle is a tough material for engraving.”

Taking a step back you went to slam the door shut, launching the box outside in the process. However, just before it could fully close, the man stuck his shoe in between the door and the frame.

“What’s the matter, Pumpkin? I thought you wanted his heart so bad?" The man spat out the words as he pushed the door open, overpowering you with barely any effort.

He stepped over the doorstep, kicking the box further into the apartment and closing the door behind him.

"I would have given you my own heart, but I still need it to love you.” Gazing upon you, a sinister smile graced his features.

You felt bile rise in your throat.

“Do you not recognize it? The heart, I mean. Seems like you didn’t hold it as dear as you were supposed to, huh?”

His chuckle caused you to throw up all over the floor in front of you.

“Oh, Pumpkin, don’t worry. I am glad, actually. That means you never truly loved him, did you?”

He took a step closer.

“Perhaps… he was just a distraction until you found your true soulmate?”

Another step.

“Is that it, Pumpkin? I am here now, you need not longer endure his presence.”

Just then it hit you.

You never mentioned that the visitor was male.

This was not some elaborate sick joke, this man in front of you killed someone, your Lover's blood was on his hands.

Your gaze snapped up to meet his, eyes wide in shock and brows furrowed in fury.

“What…what did you do?” It took far too much effort to speak as you choked out each word.

The man stepped over the contents of your stomach strewn across the floor and stretched out his hand in a comforting gesture, though it felt more looming than anything else.

“I just took care of the trash.” He said it in such a nonchalant fashion that it made you sick.

Slapping his hand away, you quickly backed away, your mind racing as you contemplated your next move.

His gaze darkened, the red eyes staring at you grew into slim slits.

“Pumpkin, are you not happy I have freed you of him?”

This guy was nuts, just what on earth was he talking about?

“We can finally be together, just you and me with no one else in the way.”

His eyes locked onto your necklace and the corners of his mouth tugged upwards.

“What the hell are you talking about, I don't even know you!”

Taken aback by your statement, the man momentarily stopped in his tracks, hurt lacing his facial features now.

“I'm Sol, you… you know me.” He said it like it's the most obvious thing in the world, as if he couldn't wrap his head around the fact, the mere possibility of you not knowing him.

“We've been in the same art class for three years…three years which I spent desperately trying to get your attention.”

Slowly but surely he grew irritated.

“Look, Sol,” You tried your best to diffuse the situation for that is your only option as of now. “I'm sure I have seen you around, but you have never talked to me, have you?”

Sol's brows furrowed in irritation now.

“I have talked to you before, I have tried to befriend you and gain your affection, but you?”

The man scoffed as he stepped closer, his pace not slow and careful anymore but fast and purposeful. Before you knew it, he had your upper arm in a bruising, vice-like grip.

“You cut the conversation short. Every. Time. You disregarded me over and over again.”

He leaned in closer to your face and you felt a heavy weight settle in your stomach.

“I didn’t get why…and I have tried with all my might to prevent blood-shed, but you forced my hand, Pumpkin. The moment you officially started dating that slug, I knew I had to get active… I couldn't idly stand by and watch someone take the love of my life from me.”

He cupped your cheek with his free, ice cold hand and you started breathing faster.

“I tried to win you over, even as you were dating him but you acted like you weren't interested in me in the slightest… Do you have any idea how much that hurt me?”

Sighing, he lowered his head momentarily.

“And now seeing this necklace on you… you always knew you were mine, didn't you? Even if it was some part hidden in the depths of your heart…”

The sun necklace.

Sol meant sun.

You unintentionally marked yourself as his property, further playing into his delusions.

“Were you just stringing me along, wanting to see how far I would go for you? You were aware of my presence all this time, weren't you?”

Sol leaned in closer, shuddering in delight as he took a deep breath, inhaling your scent.

”All those years I've spent longing for you, watching your every move…”

Your breathing grew ragged, the panic in your stomach increased tenfold at the realisation and coursed through your entire body.

“It was all worth it. And to know you love me too… it's better than anything I could ever imagine.”

With every word he spoke you took more eager breaths, trying to calm yourself but ultimately ending in hyperventilation. Tears streamed down your face, which he wiped away with his thumb, the touch feather-light and filled with adoration. Had anyone else done it, had Crowe done it, it would have been comforting, but coming from him, especially in the current situation it disgusted you more than anything.

“Shh, Pumpkin, calm down, I'm here…it's alright…”

Sol pulled you closer to him, wrapping his strong arms around you.

You failed to recognize the words he muttered, too occupied with your own thoughts.

You could have prevented this.

You are the reason Crowe is dead.

If only you had been less ignorant.

The world around you started swaying a little, the lack of proper oxygen due to hyperventilation getting to you.

Sol carefully picked you up and as much as you wanted to thrash in his grasp, you couldn't, far too disoriented and weak to do so. Your arms were aimlessly flaying around, only earning a few grunts from him whenever you managed to hit him.

“Let's relax a little… I see you left your favourite show on, perfect to relax to, isn't it?”

He laid you down on the bed, climbing in right after and wrapping his arms around you in a tight embrace once more.

You could feel your consciousness slipping away and no matter how desperately you tried to hold onto it, it was no use, you couldn't will your body to breathe more calmly and evenly.

He kissed the top of your head and tried to comfort you, although it did nothing but unsettle you further.

“Don't worry, Pumpkin…I'm here now and I won't leave until your visitor arrives.”

Your visitor won't ever arrive.

Sol won't leave you anymore, will he?

A sinister chuckle with an edge of playfulness to it, echoed from his direction as he spoke the last words you heard before passing out.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Pumpkin.”

[nagaytoe]

The eddie munson brainrot is too strong AHHH

i love my boyfriend

[nagaytoe]

I LOVE ALL THOSE LITTLE DETAILS; ITS SO PRETTYYYY

[nagaytoe]

Fatum

(Latin) [noun] Fate

Jericho Ichabod X Reader

Word Count: 4k

Requests: Open

TWs/Tags: Death, poison, corrupt gods, fate, existential crisis (?), PAST LIVE THEORY

Note: This was inspired by an audio from 'Dangerously yours', the past life theory and one of my favorite books 'Midnight Library'!!

(Hopefully this won't be a flop otherwise i may or may not go loca)

Tags: @sagegreen31

“Look! A shooting star!”

Crowe’s delicate finger pointed towards the night sky above you, as you felt the blades of grass tickle your neck.

Indeed there was, there was a bright star, brighter than any you’ve seen so far, making its way over the horizon. You couldn’t help but wonder where it’s path may lead it.

“Did you make a wish?”

You turned your head, facing Crowe, his hair spread over the ground in silky brunette locks, free from his signature braid.

Humming, you answer in a whisper, “I have.”

Now he turns his head to you too, the gash on his neck stretching as he does, causing you to grimace a little.

“What is it you have wished for?”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you gave him a bittersweet smile.

“I wished we were two other people, two people who need not say goodbye…”

Blood stained Crowe’s neck and the once lush, green grass beneath him.

He gave you a sad smile in response, reaching out to clutch your left hand with his right one.

“I am sure your wish will be fulfilled, my Love.”

Your brows furrowed at his comment, unable to grasp the meaning behind his words. Crowe chuckled slightly, softly squeezing your hand in his larger one, though the warmth it once carried was long gone.

“The tree,” Crowe pointed towards the tree which loomed over the two of you. “Do you remember what I told you about it?”

Pondering for a moment, you looked up at the tree’s branches, which partly obscured the view of the clear sky with stars scattered all over.

“Lily’s myth?”

“Yes, of the healing abilities the fruits bear.”

“Or of how poisonous they might be.”

Crowe sighed, but he was far from annoyed at your comment as a small smile played on his lips. “Nevertheless, it is the place where humans allegedly have come in touch with gods, it should be worth a try. Perhaps you will be fortunate enough to receive audience with one of this country’s patrons.”

“I was under the impression you did not believe in gods.”

Your remark makes him chuckle softly. “I do not, no. However, in this plane, where we currently find ourselves in, things might work differently. Who is to say that no one will answer your prayers?”

As you took a look around, everything seemed normal. It looked the same way it did yesterday evening, which was the happiest night of your life. Memories of Crowe’s soft lips upon yours made your heart flutter, the joy was short-lived however, for soon you remembered the predicament you both found yourselves in just several moments ago.

Blood had been everywhere, on the floor, on the walls, on Crowe’s body.

You had crouched down next to his body, wailing for your deceased lover, though it would not take long for you to join him in the afterlife. Perhaps it was better this way, for you did not wish to live in a world without him anyways.

“My Love, I believe our time is coming to a close.” Directing your attention back to Crowe, you noticed that he, as well as the park surrounding you, slowly faded away.

“No.” You felt panic rising up in your stomach as you sat up. “I won’t lose you… not again. I don’t know what will become of me without you, Crowe…”

“My Love, you will find me again, that I am sure of. We may not have been fortunate enough to be able to love each other in this life, but there must be one where we are granted this luxury.” He reached out to cup your cheek with his hand, but it passed right through you, unable to make contact with your skin. Tears welled up in your eyes as you tried to hold onto him, but to no avail. Your heart clenched painfully in your chest and it seemed as though it might implode.

“Crowe, don’t go, please…”

He gave you a sad smile, tears of his own streaming down his face. “I love you, in this life, every life before and every life to come.”

With that he vanished. It was as if he had never been here in the first place. You looked around, an endless sea of nothingness engulfing the surrounding area..

Suddenly, a voice was heard, loud and clear as if right next to you, it’s echo carried far in this empty plane.

“You bear a wish, my Child?”

Your head snapped into all possible directions but you failed to find any trace of another being in this space. “What?”

The voice was soothing, responding to you in a calm and quiet manner.

“You have wished upon a shooting star, have you not?”

The shooting star… was Crowe right after all? You looked to the side, seeing Lilith’s tree solely standing in all it’s glory amidst the darkness, which made it look awfully out of place.

“I may be able to grant your wish, if only you reveal what it is you long for.”

Something manifested behind you, the glow it emitted catching your attention. You turn around to find the silhouette of a woman, except for her luminescence she bears no features, as if she was but a mere shadow.

Clenching your fists a your sides, you took a deep breath before speaking your wish aloud.

“I wish for a life where Jericho Ichabod and I can be happily together.”

If only the woman had features, you could see her frown. However, the slight change to a more sorrowful tone in her melodic voice was telling enough.

“Oh, my poor Child, I am afraid this is the one wish I cannot grant you.”

The crack which struck your glass-like heart was almost audible as your breath caught in your throat. “Why?”

“It is not within my abilities to redirect fate.”

Your heart fully shattered, the pieces it left cutting into your lungs and robbing you entirely of your breath.

“What?” The question was uttered breathlessly, as if air was refusing to further fill your lungs.. “Are you implying we are not fated to be with each other?”

“I mean just that. There is no timeline in which you two may have the liberty of being together.”

The woman might as well have ripped your heart out and shredded it to pieces, instead it was left to shatter within the confines of your chest, behind a wall of flesh, muscles and bone. Oh, how you longed to rip open your ribcage and take out your very own heart in order to never feel pain of this sort ever again.

“Why!? I don’t get it! I love him, more than anything, why must I, why must we, be punished like this?!”

She fell silent for a moment at your cries and even though you could not see her facial expressions, you were certain she is pondering. “I see you fail to remember.”

Her remark almost made you recoil as you halt your bellows. “Remember what?”

“Your ancient sin. Fret not, dear Child, for I will enlighten you,” She motioned you to step closer, holding out her glowing hand. “Come to me, Child.”

Walking closer, you hesitantly laid your hand into hers, which was way colder than you would have expected it to be. “See this tree?”

You nodded in response, looking up at the giant tree. It’s the very same one under which you confessed your love for Crowe and realized the brightest star was not up above you, but right beside you.

The way Crowe looked at you, with a sparkle in his eyes as if he had plucked one of the stars from the sky above you and laced his eyes with it’s glow, was ingrained into your memories, deeply embedded into the depths of your brain where you could treasure it forever.

“You ate one of it’s forbidden fruits.” Your head snapped into the woman’s direction, a confused expression etched into your features.

“Excuse me?”

She chuckled. “Naturally, you fail to recall the event, for it took place centuries ago. Although, with your existence in this plane I would have expected you to remember. Never mind that, though.”

The woman let go of your hand and ushered you into the direction of the tree.

“Go on, my Child, pluck one of the fruits.”

Heeding her initial words, your gaze snapped back towards her. “But I thought I was not allowed to.”

“My Dear, we are no longer on the earthly plane, their rules do not apply here. Nevertheless, this tree in front of you is not the same tree, it is but a mere projection, you need not worry about possible consequences.”

Her words made you wonder, thinking deeper about something you had so blatantly disregarded.

“What is this here anyways?”

“It is the Bithalassus. The space between the mortal realm and the place where the soul goes after it perished from it’s vessel.”

A place between the realm of the living and of the dead. It made sense, but you failed to wrap your head around it, perhaps it was outside your capabilities to truly grasp this concept. “What place will my soul go to?”

“That is entirely dependent on your beliefs, my Child.” The woman assured you. “If you believe in heaven, you may go there, if you believe you ought to be reincarnated, you will wake up to a new life.”

Her words did not soothe your qualms entirely.

“I see… And what will happen if I take one of the fruits from the tree?”

“You will relive a past life, the one were you committed your ancient sin, to be exact.”

Cocking your head to the side, you tried your best to make sense of all the information she was throwing at you.

“But… won’t I be confused with all the modern world knowledge?”

“Do not worry about that. You will remember everything from your life at that time and in exchange forget everything from any other life you have lived so far. The memories of your current life will return, alongside the revelation of your sin, once you return to this space.”

You nodded and stepped towards the big tree. Looking up into it’s branches, you studied the fruits that hung from them and carefully, reluctance evident in your movements, plucked one of the fruits. A bright red apple, almost unnaturally so.

“Take a bite, won’t you?”

Hesitance laced your actions as you inched the apple towards your mouth. You were left to wonder what would await you once you took a bite, whether it would turn out to be but a mere ruse or reveal your past. As soon as you bit into the apple, your vision faded to black.

—

“Good morning, my Starlight.”

A warm, comforting voice awoke you from your slumber. Your eyes fluttered open, only to be met with deep blue ones. Neither the boisterous depths of the sea near your kingdom, nor the sky at night, littered with it’s glowing white freckles, will ever compare to the lovely shade of blue his eyes possessed.

“My Love,” wrapping your arm around him, you pulled his resting body closer to your equally still one. “Have you slept well?”

“How could I not with you next to me?”

A bright smile made it’s way to your face, the corners of your lips tugging upwards in response to his sweet words as you looked up at him. Words could barely describe how much he loved your smile, for not even the sun could compare to how it lit up any space you graced with your presence.

“My Love, I was dreaming the sweetest dream of you and I.” Jericho pressed a kiss to your forehead, resting his chin on the crown of your hair right after. “In my vision the two of us were standing at the ocean’s shore, watching the sunset. You were carrying a basket full of fruit and the two of us couldn’t help but indulge, eating one sweet apple after the other.” He chuckled, stroking the back of your head. “It felt so very peaceful.” Sighing, he pulled back to look you in the eyes with a warm smile on his lips.

“It appears we have a plan for today then.” Pressing a swift, sweet kiss to his lips, you pulled back just as quickly and rolled over in order to get out of bed.

“A plan you say?” Jericho propped himself up on his elbows as he gazed upon you with a curious expression.

“I will take care of it, worry not.” With that, you turned around and left your shared chamber, leaving your Lover dumbfounded.

Jericho heard a knock on the door to the dressing room, your voice calling out to him and asking for permission to enter. Once granted, you swung open the door, taking in the sight of your Lover cladded in different hues of purple and blue.

“Finished so soon?” He quirked an eyebrow as he walked towards you, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close to his chest. Nodding, you informed Jericho that all that was left for you to do was getting dressed properly. He pressed a sweet kiss to your lips before turning to leave the room, giving you enough space to change out of your nightgown.

It didn’t take long for you to put on your finest garments for a casual day out, topping your apparel off with the most astonishing jewels Jericho had given you as a courting gift.

Leaving the chamber ladened to the brim with chests, half of which contained yours and the other half Jericho’s garments, you made your way towards your fiancé, who was currently sitting on your shared bed.

“Will you tell me what awaits me, my Dear?”

His gaze wandered over you, his smile subtly widening as he took in the sight of the jewels you wore.

“You have seen it once upon a dream.”

Jericho’s smile shifted into a grin as he stood up, now towering over you.

“I cannot fathom what that may be.” You couldn’t help but smirk in return to his remark. Taking ahold of his hand, you led him through the castle.

“We will not be feasting here today.”

The revelation of this information caused his brows to furrow ever so slightly as you pushed open the door to the kitchen. You were greeted by the castle’s chef, who handed you a basket with a polite smile on his lips. His long black hair was tied up and you couldn’t help but wonder just how long it may be once released from it’s usual style.

“I take it you plan on having a picnic with me?” Confirming Jericho’s speculation, you nodded and left the castle through the back door.

Rays of sunlight beamed upon the two of you, illuminating each of your features. It felt like a warm blanket was wrapped around you, engulfing you in a familiar, comfortable feeling. The surrounding scenery was nothing short of beautiful. Lush green grass covered the ground for as far as you could see. Tall trees carried bright green leaves, which glowed with an orange tint due to the sunlight, the remnants of it filtered through the greenery and created small patterns on the ground. The sky above you was a bright blue with no cloud in sight and you couldn’t help but close your eyes, inhaling deeply and taking in the moment.

A comfortable silence befell the two of you as you walked next to your fiancé. It was one of the many things you adored so much about him.

It didn’t take long to reach the shore, merely five minutes which were spent in mostly silence, though you wouldn’t complain. You had all day to talk about all sorts of topics with your Love.

“We won’t be able to watch the sunset, it is far too early.”

You came to a halt in front of the sandbank to take off your shoes. Your feet met the warm sand as soon as your footwear left them and you looked up at Jericho who was still taking off his boots.

“We can stay here until the sun sets, my Love, we have the entire day solely for us.”

He nodded and fell into step with you, carrying both pairs of shoes in his right arms, his left was occupied by your hand slithered around his biceps.

You settled down on the soft ground a few feet away from the water and placed the basket in between the two of you.

“What did you let the chef pack for us?” You looked over and met Jericho’s gaze with a soft smile.

“A bit of everything but mostly apples, I know how much you like them.”

His eyebrows lifted a little and he pointed out your distaste for the fruit. You chuckled in response, telling him you didn’t mind, as long as he was happy.

Taking in the sight of the luscious red apples nestled in the wooden container, you licked your lips. Despite not being too fond of apples, these looked way too tantalizing to be resisted.

“Perhaps I will try one after all…” Grabbing an apple, you handed it to Jericho before getting one for yourself.

He grinned at you and nudged his apple against yours like one would when clinking glasses.

The soft crashes of the waves helped you calm down even further, almost coaxing you into complete relaxation. The two of you brought each of your apples to your lips simultaneously and took a bite.

Initially, it tasted sweet, sweeter than anything you have eaten before and you hummed in contentment. However, the taste slowly morphed into something bitter, almost making you gag and crave to spit it out. Looking over at your Lover with wide eyes, you take in his horrified expression. He was clawing at his throat, gasping for air and not too long after you did the same. No matter how deeply you tried to inhale, oxygen refused to fill your lungs.

You hunched forward, almost laying on your side as you were bound to watch the star-like light leave Jericho’s eyes as you were wounding in pain. Desperately reaching out, you tried to take his hand, but he laid just a hairbreadth too far away. You looked up at the sky, dark clouds covered the once bright blue canvas and it almost seemed macabre to you that in your last moments you were refused any source of light and comfort, whether it be through the light of your world or the light of the earth. The view up above you seemed to darken even further, until all you could see was complete darkness.

—

You shot up, sputtering and gasping for air.

“Do you understand now?”

Your head snapped towards the soothing voice of the glowing silhouette and you realized you were back in the endless plane of darkness, Bithalassus.

“The apples?” You desperately tried to make sense of your previous observations. The woman nodded in response.

“But… we didn’t steal any, they were given to us!” Your brows furrowed as you argued, refusing to believe that Crowe and you are bound to receive eternal punishment for a sin you have not committed.

“I am afraid it does not matter who stole the apples, only who ate them.”

“But you said-”

“I never confirmed any theory you mortals came up with.” The woman interrupted with an unexpected firmness in her voice, before sighing as she continued her explanation.

“My child, listen closely and I may grant you the information you crave. The fruits of Lillith’s tree are free for anyone to take, however, they must be used as an offering for the gods. I am sure you feel wronged, but it does not matter whether you knew the fruits were meant for consumption or not.”

Your eyes widened at her explanation. “This means anyone could curse whoever they please to curse!”

She nodded. “It appears so. Although, the one who dooms another soul is bound to be cursed as well.”

You raised your eyebrows, reveling in this new found information. “That means the man who did this was also cursed?”

“Indeed he was and it might be in your interest to know that he was executed the very next day as well. Tell me, did you recognize him perchance?”

Pondering for a moment, you realized you had barely paid any attention to the man, leading you to shake your head in response to her question.

“It is someone you know all to well.”

Realization dawned upon you at her statement.

“Solivan?”

The woman nodded once more. “Yes, Solivan. For the rest of his existence, in all possible timelines, he will need to suffer from unrequited love, just like how his love for you was unrequited in the life you have just witnessed.”

Fate will repeat itself over and over again, that you were almost completely sure of now.

“Does this mean Sol will always be the one to kill Crowe?”

“It means just that.”

Your gaze met the ground and you could feel rage bubbling up in your stomach. All of this was his fault and there was no way to undo what has been done.

“My wish,” your tongue darted out to lick your lips and you tried your best to keep your composure. Ugly, unfiltered anger poured out of every pore but you urged yourself to phrase your wish as calmly as possible. You looked at her face and for the first time since you came here you questioned whether she was one of the goddesses of your land just like you had assumed or if she was merely a fragment of your imagination. It shall not matter, if she was able to help you, you would take her up on her offer nevertheless.

“I wish to be aware of the sin and to recognize the one who doomed Crowe and I in every upcoming lifetime.”

With the knowledge that she could not directly interfere with fate, you hoped there was a loophole to that rule.

“If this truly is what you wish for, then I shall grant your wish.” A hint of amusement was evident in her voice and you could swear, she would smirk were she to have a mouth.

You thought of yourself as fortunate now, grateful to have wished upon the shooting star. Being able to spend a day with Crowe, experiencing the love you once shared ages ago and finding the one responsible for both of yours suffering gave you a new purpose.

No matter what it may take, you will find Solivan in every life to come and you will not let him harm Crowe ever again, for you will willingly give your life and soul if it meant Jericho Ichabod was alive and well.

You will stop this unjust curse, this vile creature who doomed you, over and over again, refusing to simply subject to fate.

_____________________________________

Funfact: Bithalassus means "(space) between two seas)" thought it would be pretty fitting with the kingdom by the sea

[nagaytoe]

Same here, Guilty as charged🫡

My current braincell:

[nagaytoe]

Love this so much

i love marvel and tkatb sm