onihitokuchi

[onihitokuchi]

Rubrum (on hiatus)

Chapter 0 - Scarlet

Chapter 1 - Crimson

Chapter 2 - Sealed

Chapter 3 - Dead-Ends

Chapter 4 - ...

Extra:

Chapter X - Secrets

[onihitokuchi]

idea stolen from @whitplague

link

I´m sick atm, so no work for me tomorrow. That means I can finally continue working on my wip´s and hopefully post at least one of them in that time. If you want, send some asks (anything, I don't care if you ask me anything or tell me about your day) or some more requests, to help entertain me while I try to form some words for you all!

[onihitokuchi]

木ノ葉隠れの里

[onihitokuchi]

I did it. I´ve finished my exams.

I will open my requests for now. It could be that I'll close them again in February because of my oral exam. For now, I still have two requests in my ask-box that are a priority. Information for requests: Please read my rules first!

Also, I would love to write a few more prompts for Kakashi, so if you want something for him, please regard my prompt-list.

And finally, I´m sorry to say that I will re-write the whole Kakashi fanfic. I re-read it and it hurt so bad reading it, you don´t even know...

Personally, I think I got way better at writing since starting that fic and I have some better ideas for some of the plot, so I decided to turn the whole thing over. I won´t delete the chapters I´ve written, but I will store them somewhere on this blog because I still want to have something to compare my current writing with. I don´t know when I will re-write it or when I will post the re-written fic, but keep an eye out!

If there is anything else on your mind, or you have any questions, you know where my ask-box is.

See ya!

[onihitokuchi]

⋆.*:･.･: about me:

･:*⋆.*:･ﾟ: .⋆:*⋆.*: 22 years old

･:*⋆.*:･:,. .⋆:*⋆.*:⋆ she/her

･:*⋆.*:･ﾟ: .⋆: ⋆.*:, currently obsessing over Levi Ackerman

⋆.*:･.･: requests: open

⋆.*:･.･: masterlist

⋆.*:･.･: rules

⋆.*:･.･: prompt list

© all copyrights reserved; do not re-post my work without my permission

[onihitokuchi]

moments (K. H.)

A/N: Hello, everybody. I know, I said I needed some time off of Tumblr until the end of my exams. But I guess life had other plans! If you´re curious about the circumstances, and how I found my inspiration for this, you can read my little rant at the bottom of this post. It´s just a little short something my mind came up with. Please don´t expect too much.

(I don´t own Naruto nor the characters in this story except for my own characters.)

Words: 693

TW: blood, death, loss of a loved one

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He knew life had been hard on her for the last few months.

The war had ended and Konoha was on its way to being rebuilt. It was a time of something new, of something unknown, but something exciting nonetheless.

And as Kakashi strolled through the broken village - welcoming the warm evening sun that kissed his face - he could practically feel the relief and happiness of all the citizens that littered the streets to clean and repair the shops on both sides.

The loud chatter and laughs seemed to get carried with him as he walked out of the village center. A small smile hid beneath his mask. Even his own contentment had been unmissable in the last few days. He knew that everything would be ok in the end, he always had known.

But as the Shinobi finally reached his final destination for the day, his happy thoughts vanished from sight. His shoulders fell and a sigh escaped him as he saw the familiar silhouette of the small woman in front of the memorial.

The new memorial that had recently been put up, for all the lost lives in the fourth war. And as he watched the woman, her back hunched over and her eyes fixed on the grass below her feet, the memories from the day the end of the war was declared rushed back into his mind. Every single moment.

He remembered that exhausted but grateful smile that had graced the woman´s face while she looked at him. He had stood next to her in the final moments - both had promised to protect one another at any cost. And he still remembers how fast her heart had been beating against his chest as she engulfed him in that bone-crushing hug, as the realization had finally settled in.

A hug that had shown so much emotion, a hug with so much love. He´ll never forget that one moment. The moment that had shown him what he really wants in his life - what he needs.

Yet, everything had to crumble down once more.

He was bewitched, he knew that. Kakashi was followed by death - he had been all his life. The feeling of loss and grief and everything in between had been a standard for him in all of his existence. He thought he was used to it.

But he couldn´t quite explain why it had hurt so much worse, watching the woman break down in front of him, the blood of her family coloring her face as she cradled the body of her little brother in her arms. He still can´t explain where the woman had found the force to let out such a blood-curling scream that haunted him at night.

The only thing he had been capable of at that moment, was to watch her weeping in agony. His lung felt empty, his heart heavy, and his eyes burned. And he didn't want - no, he couldn't think about how she felt at this exact moment.

Because he knew, that this was nothing anybody had ever felt, or thought, or seen before. Nobody had nor would ever feel like she did at the point where she lost everything. Just how nobody would ever feel the same as him at the time his fist had rushed through Rin´s chest, or as he had to leave Obito behind. Alone.

The fallen leaves crunched under his feet as he strode over to the lone woman. Kakashi now understood what someone meant when they would say that people become only a shadow of what they used to be when they lose someone dear to them.

No greeting from either side could be heard as both silently stood next to each other. Still, he understood her even without any exchange of words.

His arm wrapped around her side, his hand only ghosting over the woman´s waist. He knew that now was the time, that he would have to offer his comfort to her. Just like she had done all these years now.

And as her hand found his one, their fingers interlocking, he knew he would be there for her.

Every single moment.

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･.･ﾟ: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆:*⋆.*･ﾟ⋆*･:*⋆.*:･ﾟ: .⋆:*

Soo... These last few months were really hard for me. I had a lot of stress because of all the learning I did and then I sadly also lost a dear person. It was not immediate family, still, it hurts. I needed some time off from learning and everything that went around, so I decided to write a little something in hope of it helping me grief.

And it helped. At least a little bit. It will be better someday, I know it will. But things, especially things like this, need time.

For anybody in a similar situation: I feel for, and with you. And if anybody needs to talk about anything, I always have an open ear.

Love to you all. <3

[onihitokuchi]

I wish you all the best for your exams!!! You'll make it don't worry

Thank you so much!! I was so happy when I read your message! Now that I had time to learn most of the stuff I need to, I am certain that it won´t be such a big problem as I thought before.

Thank you again, you made my day a lot better. <3

[onihitokuchi]

I really need to take a break from writing and Tumblr in general. I know I said I would try to post the next one-shots and the next chapter of Rubrum over the course of the next weeks, but I really struggle with my time management at the moment.

As of now, I´m still undergoing vocational training and have my final exams at the beginning of December and my final oral exam will be in February.

And I think, because I haven´t started to learn (my own fault of course) and I always have these nagging thoughts about all the topics I have yet to learn, my writing is not at its best right now, and I have the feeling I won´t be able to give my everything towards it.

For that reason, I will put my writing and posting on hold, first only until I´m done with my exams in December (I will see if I have, again, to put it on hold until I am fully done with the exam in February).

It is a really stressful time for me right now, so I hope you all understand.

My requests will for sure be closed until February. I´ll also try not to open Tumblr until December. So, if you have something on your mind and/or want to ask me anything, please understand that I probably won´t answer until then.

I hope that this time off will give me the motivation and power to dedicate my free time fully to learning.

I wish every one of you the best! See you soon!

[onihitokuchi]

[onihitokuchi]

dellusions (K. H.)

A/N: Ahhh!! Thank you so much for the request dear @whitplague​ ! <3 If any of you have a moment, check out their work, it's beautiful!

I feel honored to write something for you, and I really hope that you like it. Also, thank you for being the first (!) to request a prompt for Kakashi! I´m so happy that I finally finished it! Somehow, I still don´t feel satisfied with the outcome of the one-shot, maybe I'll re-write it someday...

Hope you all enjoy reading!

(I don´t own Naruto nor the characters in this story except for my own characters.)

Prompt: #21 - “There will always be blood on my hands.”

Words: 1.674

TW: mention of injury, mention of blood, mention of suicide, mention of death, PTSD

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It was clear to everyone, members and citizens alike, that it was not an easy profession working for ANBU most of the time - the wounds and the aftereffects caused by the damage of the battles put aside.

If you´d ask them what the worst thing of their job was, all they'd speak about would be the different injuries they lived through, while proudly showing off the various scars that littered their body.

Or tell you jokingly about the time they nearly died on one of their missions.

But what they wouldn't reveal is the mental toll each aspect of being a member of this organization has on every single one of them.

The nights, where all they could do is turn from one side to the other, wishing for at least an hour of sleep.

The nights, where they would wake up drenched in sweat and tears - and please let this suffering subside...

Nobody talked about how one mother had cowered in the corner of the living room one night, afraid of her own son that pointed a kunai towards her because - Please! You're home again... nobody will hurt you... please go back to sleep... please...

None of their friends dare to approach them from behind after a long mission - afraid that the same accident would happen as the first time one of them decided to pat them on their shoulder - only to give out a choked `It´s good to see you.` while being held up by their throat.

The moments, where they would relive seeing their friends die - again and again and again.

The images of the people - the children - killed by their own two hands.

And the blood...

There is always so much blood.

It was no wonder to anybody, that many would quit after one fateful mission, leaving ANBU for good and seeking out another profession.

But sadly, to some of them, the only way out - the only way to stop these gruesome thoughts, these terrible screams, and the vengeful cries from within - was their self-destruction.

Whether it be alcohol, pills, or in the end suicide, didn´t matter.

Nevertheless, the ones that stayed in that profession usually had certain things in their life that helped them stay sane; It could be the family that greeted them after a long mission with a warm meal, the weekly visits for a mental evaluation, or the partner´s relieved smile that welcomed them back home.

Unfortunately, a few of these ninjas didn´t have the privilege nor the luck to be greeted by anyone when they came back exhausted, drenched in sweat and blood - not knowing if it belonged to them or to their opponent.

Still, somehow even they managed.

Sometimes at least.

                       -        -        -

"Kakashi?"

A small voice rang through the corridors of the empty ANBU quarters. The woman wandering around had been told by one of her teammates, that their captain still hadn´t resurfaced from the locker rooms after their accomplished mission.

It hadn´t been an easy one, for none of them. Nobody had any life-threatening wounds - at least no serious injuries worth mentioning  - but it had been a tiring and long fight after they had finally found their targets.

However, the condition their captain was in - after he had jumped between her and one of the rogue-nins who would have shot his final blow towards her - His condition was another story.

The rumors about the cold-blooded copy-nin, the friend-killer, finally had subsided after years of ignoring the calls that were aimed at his back.

Still, the scene that had unfolded in front of the woman´s eyes on their mission reminded her of all the years Kakashi had to go through his trauma alone, all the while others shamed him, feared him, and degraded him.

The echo of the ninja´s footsteps came to a stop at the half-open door to one of the changing rooms. She reached her hand towards the knob, opening the door until the hinges blocked the movement, and took a peek inside the space.

It seemed empty, abandoned even. But as the woman turned to leave, the sound of running water stopped her movements.

She turned her head back and repeated her outcall once more, hopeful for an answer this time.

However, as no one responded, she entered the dim room and aimed for the showers, assuming that someone had perhaps forgotten to turn off the water in one of the showers.

As her footsteps came closer and closer towards the tiled room, she stopped yet again as the room was engulfed in utter silence from one moment to the other. The water had stopped running.

Before she could investigate any further, a figure rushed through the shadows out of the shower room towards one of the lockers in the corner.

`So he still is here.` The woman concluded as she took off in the direction of Kakashi´s locker.

The man´s back was turned to her as she approached him slowly. Water drops fell from his grey hair down to his shoulders while he hastily buttoned his pants.

"Hey." The woman made her presence known as she stopped some distance away from him. "We all wondered what took you so long."

A scoff escaped Kakashi´s mouth. His head turned sideways and his bloodshot eye met hers.

"Of course you did.", the man agreed, sarcasm dripping with each word spoken.

The woman´s hand twitched at her side, a memory of the last time Kakashi had spoken to her in a way like this resurfaced in her mind.

"I- Don´t you remember? We made plans with the team to meet after the mission. We wanted to go-", the woman flinched as Kakashi slammed his locker shut, her words stuck in her throat as she looked at the dent in the metal door.

"Why-", he let out a shuddering breath. He leaned his forehead on the now-closed locker. The metal cooling down his burning skin.

"Why would any of you want me there? Hm?" The Copy Ninja questioned quietly.

So, her grim assumption had been right. The move Kakashi had pulled, to save her sorry ass on that mission, awoke his dreadful memories again and had him spiraling down once more.

`It´s my fault...` The woman´s eyes widened in realization as she remembered Kakashi´s shock-filled eyes as his fist had buried itself deep inside the chest of their last target, the smell of burning flesh and blood had her choking on the ground.

One second - one mistake on her behalf - was the only thing it took to have their captain crumble down again.

A sigh escaped the woman as she crossed the distance between her and Kakashi bit by bit. The man winced as she gently laid her hand on his shoulder, giving it a slight squeeze of comfort.

"Look at me.", she demanded softly.

Her hands reached for the sides of his masked face, her thumbs stroking his cheeks feather-like, as he finally had turned to meet her worried eyes.

She contemplated for a while, not exactly sure what to say, not knowing what would help his state of mind right now as it had been a long time since the last occasion where she had taken care of Kakashi after he had broken down.

A whisper stopped her considerations. "It-", Kakashi´s voice cracked. "It was just like back then...", he muttered as he angrily wiped at his eyes, the tears threatening to fall.

She took a deep breath as her hands fell from his face to his own two hands. "It wasn´t your fault Kakashi.", she tried to assure him.

The man sharply inhaled as the woman got in contact with his hands. Her brows furrowed at his pain-stricken expression as she took a look at his sore palms.

A choked sob broke out of Kakashi. "There was- There was so much blood again.", he tried to explain. "I- I couldn´t get it off. It wouldn´t come off."

Kakashi snatched his hands out of his teammate's grip to furiously rub his palms on the sides of his tights up and down only to be stopped by her arms looping around his middle, engulfing him in a tight hug.

With a soothing voice, she told him again and again that this never was his fault - chanting it to him like a mantra, in hope of convincing him even to the slightest.

And after a while, both of them were submerged in silence. The only sounds that could be heard were Kakashi´s shuddering breaths, his heart pounding at his ribcage, and the faint buzz of the ceiling lamps.

The woman relaxed a bit, the tight embrace loosening as she anticipated - wished - that the worst was over.

She raised her chin, seeking eye contact with the trembling man in her arms, merely finding his glistening eye fixated on the air behind her.

Before she could try to get him out of his trance, however, he started mumbling, apparently to himself. Only after she asked him for the second time to repeat himself did she understand his low whispers.

Kakashi looked at the woman holding him, a defeated expression on his face. "There will always be blood on my hands.", he exhaled.

A matter of fact to him now.

`There is nothing you can do...` The woman gulped at her bleak thoughts. Her eyes started watering as well now, as the significance of his words settled in.

He will never get over it.

He will always remember it.

And there is nothing, she or anyone else could do, to change it.

Her arms tightened again as she pushed her face back in his shoulder - her own breath now shuddering as well - while the tears she had tried to hold back freely flowed down her cheeks.

                        -        -        -

Because, you see ...

The worst thing that nobody talks about, is seeing your loved ones falling apart, without any way of preventing it.

[onihitokuchi]

Sadly, this week I won´t post the next one-shot that sits in my requests. This week was really hard for me, and I did not find the time to continue writing the one-shot...

I´m really sorry about that. I don´t know why I feel so bad about not updating, but I have this feeling like I am responsible to give you new content as fast as possible (I know I don´t need to, but either way, I feel bad about it).

I hope everyone understands! I wish everyone a nice week-end.

[onihitokuchi]

if you would be so kind as to reblog this if you feel insecure about your writing skills.

[onihitokuchi]

Ab ovo. (I. U.)

A/N: Thank you again, dear anon, for the request! I took the chance to choose one of the prompts from the list myself. I hope everything is to your satisfaction!

(Takes place in an AU where the Uchiha massacre never happened and Itachi stayed in the village.)

(I don´t own Naruto nor the characters in this story except for my own characters.)

Prompt: #24 - "It wasn't your fault."

Words: 1.306

TW: other than slight angst, none

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"You know...", the child showed an almost toothless smile, "We should be friends!"

A second passed before the other child erupted in a fit of giggles at the same time as it tried to answer. 

"I- I-", it tried to catch its breath while it wiped its laugh-teared eyes with the back of the sleeve - sticky food stains visible on it.

"I just- I just wanted to say the same.", the child managed to finally speak properly, with only a few hiccups between the words. 

And with that small statement, both children blew up with laughter, as if it has been the most hilarious thing the two of them have ever heard.

The pair would spend the rest of the afternoon playing together, as if they had known each other all along - all the while bickering back and forth, about who had the idea of being friends first.

Their mothers, both sitting on the same bench only inches apart, shook their heads as they watched their children interact with each other. The two older women greeted each other, small smiles appearing on their two faces. Both happily accepting that they would have to meet more often from now on.

A relieved sigh escaped one of the two mothers. She was happy that her child finally seemed to make friends with others and open up more.

"It has been always hard for her to talk to other kids", she thought.

A high-pitched screech interrupted her thought process. Every parent and child on the playground turned their heads toward the child in question.

One of the little girls tried to draw her mother´s attention to her with a thrilling scream, blabbering brightly about how she had made a new friend.

The woman waved to her daughter, just as excited as her. 

She could only imagine the trouble the two little girls would start together; Not knowing that the other parent next to her just had the same thought.

                       -        -        -

It did not make sense to her.

Did I do something wrong?

Did I forgot something important?

Did I say something wrong?

These were the thoughts that had clouded the young woman´s mind every minute the last few days.

It simply made no sense.

Her sleep-deprived eyes fixed on the wall opposite her bed as her grim thoughts were flooding her tired mind. New teardrops found their way down the woman's blotchy cheeks, flowing over the almost dried tear streaks that were still apparent.

She chuckled bitterly. I haven´t even felt this awful when I first got my heart broken. 

No, this was no pain that could be compared to any heartache a man could inflict. It was unbelievable for the woman, that her friend - her best friend, she had considered - would bring such agony to her.

The click of the front door, indicating someone had entered, interrupted her unrestrained thoughts. The woman´s head turned to look at the alarm clock on the side table. 3 pm, it read.

A wave of shame overcame her. Itachi had asked her in the morning, if she´d like to come and help him train. 

It's such beautiful weather, he had said to her with a small smile. But she had declined his request nonetheless, reasoning that she had some things to take care of. 

And in the end, she had not left her bed for the whole day.

"Love?", Itachi poked his head through the doorway to the bedroom. His dark hair was always a mess after his training - sticking in every direction, and some stray hairs clinging to his sweaty forehead. 

 The smile that had at first graced the man´s face dropped in an instant as he saw the condition his lover was in; Her eyes were red, looking like she had been crying for some time now, and it seemed as if she had not moved from their shared bed for the entire day. 

It had of course come to his attention, that she had something on her mind that had haunted her for the last week. He had asked her if something was on her mind - if she wanted to talk. But she only shrugged his concerns away, showing him her unwillingness of sharing her concerns. 

Without another thought, Itachi walked over and sat next to her on the bed. His hand reached for one of hers.

"Tell me... What happened?", he questioned quietly as his other hand put a few of her stray hairs behind her ear.

Her lip was quivering slightly at his words. She could not even think about telling Itachi about how her friend seemed to distance herself from her. How her friend had told her, that she would not want to meet with her anymore or how her friend talked her down in front of her other friends. 

Pathetic, she had thought. He would only think that I´m naive and childish for being so miserably about something like this.

But apparently, this small gesture of comfort Itachi had given her, was enough for the woman to break down completely.

Itachi was in utter disbelief after the woman had told him everything that her friend had done to her.

How she had left her waiting for her, at the café they always meet at. How she hasn´t talked to her for the past days, and every time she tried to speak with her friend she had just walked away without another word.

He thought, that this must be a joke. A cruel joke.

He knew her friend, and he knew how long they knew each other and how close they are. - Were.

So, with the crying woman now in his arms, he tried the only thing that he knew could make her feel at least a little bit better. 

He whispered loving words to her. He held her close, rubbing her back while doing so. He tried to tell her, that this sometimes happens; Friendships have an ending sometimes, he told her. He only heard a little whimper coming from the woman in response.

After some time, the two found themselves laying arm in arm in the bed. Both still disheveled, her from the bad day she had and him from his hour-long training before. But neither seemed to care, as both enjoyed the body contact and silence between them.

Itachi had expected her to sleep - her breathing was low and even - but just before he had the chance to get out of the bed, a small voice stopped him.

"Is it -", her breath got caught for a second. "Is it my fault?", she turned her head towards his, her teary eyes glistening in the afternoon sun.

Hearing this, seeing her like this, broke Itachi´s heart. Anger bubbled up inside of him. How could anybody do this to someone? His hand found the side of her face, leading her head closer to his.

Their noses were almost touching as Itachi spoke softly to her. "My love...", he wiped his thumbs under her eyes, erasing the new tears that flowed down the woman´s cheeks. "Believe me... It wasn´t your fault." He closed the space until their lips touched briefly before separating again.

Itachi knew, that hearing this from him, would not be enough for the woman to believe it. But he hoped that this would at least help her for the start. Help her, in overcoming the sorrow and the insecurities the ending of the friendship had brought her. 

Help her, to heal...

                       -        -        -

"We will be friends forever, right?", the child looked over to her friend that sat next to her on the grass.

The other child picked something from the ground before gazing back. "Of course.", it smiled brightly, holding out a small daisy for her friend to take. "Forever!"

[onihitokuchi]

[onihitokuchi]

My requests are now closed.

At the moment I have three two left now requests for Itachi Uchiha and one for Kakashi Hatake sitting in my ask-box. I will write and post these in the time that my requests are closed (hopefully one one-shot per week). I'll also try to post the next chapter of Rubrum in that time.

If you want to send a request, you still can, but I will not start to write it until my requests are open again.

And if you want to send a request, please read my rules that are linked in my bio.

Thank you, to everybody that requested something and to everybody that reads my posts! You all help me to stay motivated!

And if you have anything else on your mind, feel free to send me an ask or massage!

<3

[onihitokuchi]

[onihitokuchi]

morbus (I. U.)

A/N: Thank you for the requests, dear anons! I hope none of you mind, that I used both of your requests to write one one-shot. I just thought the two would work perfect together. I hope you like it! Second A/N at the bottom.

(I don´t own Naruto nor the characters in this story except for my own characters.)

Prompts: #16 - “Bad dream?”; #17 - “Don´t lie to me.”

Words: 1.409

TW: Blood, indication of death

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･.･ﾟ: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆:*⋆.*･ﾟ⋆*･:*⋆.*:･ﾟ: .⋆:*

It was never Itachi´s intention to lie to her. 

In fact he had never lied to her. Not  a  single  time. 

For the Uchiha, it felt more like withholding unimportant information or giving spare excuses.

Up to the first time this horrible cough had rippled through him, Itachi not once gave a second thought to the harsh throbbing pain behind his rib cage as he took each breath, or the ache in his heart that would spread through his whole body when he moved in one certain way.

However, as he felt this hot liquid, burning its way up to his throat - the taste of it much too similar to blood, the Uchiha had thought - he knew, it was only a matter of time now. 

And he was sure of it, he had to change his plans.

With the current knowledge, that it was possible that not his beloved brother would end him, but this sickness as it slowly became worse and worse, he started to search for something that would change that fact.

Nevertheless, what he did not expect, was that the various pills, teas and drugs he took - that he had thanked the lonely old woman, that lived at the edge of the woods, for giving him - would prolong the ultimate outcome, but his symptoms would only worsen with time.

Don´t understand it wrong, Itachi did not care if Kisame, Konan or any other member would find out about his suffering, and neither would they care when they would get to know about his sickness.

What Itachi did care about, would be whether his partner would notice or not.

 The stress that would come with his concerns weighted his shoulders down even more. 

He hadn´t even thought about how hurtful it would be for her, knowing that they both would not spend their life together as she had thought before.

Of course, it was clear for the both of them, that living this kind of life would not bring them the happy-ending everybody wished for. 

But Itachi had at least hoped, that he would have a little more time with his lover...

Still, as the days slowly blurred together more and more and his pain would gradually get worse, the nagging thoughts in the deepest corner of his mind would move to the surface as fast as the pain would come. 

What if she finds out? 

It would break her heart if you tell her.

She wouldn´t think of you the same as before, after lying to her for so long.

I am not lying...

If you tell her, you will lose her.

What if she wants to help?

...

There is nothing that will help.

He was a master at hiding - nobody would say anything different -, whether it be his emotions, his thoughts or in this case: his illness.

And at first, it worked.

He religiously cleaned up after himself. When he would start to feel a bloody cough gripping at his lungs, he would excuse himself and leave. The times he would be on a mission with her together, he would refuse to show how painful it actually was to keep up with her speed.

He would laugh with her, even if it felt like it ripped him apart from the inside. He would play his receding eye-sight off, saying that it had run in the family. 

You don´t need to worry, he had told her with a small smile.

He would make love to her,  but only in the dark where his pain-stricken face would be hidden in the shadows. 

But... things changed with time.

Eventually, his carefulness receded and Itachi started to isolate himself.

The bloody tissues, where he had coughed his lungs out a few hours ago, would lay on the ground. He had stopped taking her with him on missions and even refused to train with her. The intimate nights together, with loving touches and gentle strokes were long forgotten.

It became only harder for him. Harder, trying to hide the pain. Harder, trying to hide the blood, that would often mix with his tears when he used the mangyeko sharingan too much. Harder, to give the woman he loved so dearly everything she wanted.

And then, she started to notice.

The blood that would stick to the sides of his mouth. The dark circles under his bloodshot eyes, that seemed to get darker every day. His lack of appetite, which lead to Itachi getting thinner and thinner.

She tried to ignore all these signs, thinking that if her lover would have a problem, he would tell her. 

And after all this time they had spent together, she hoped that he would know, that she would help him. Through anything.

You need to eat more, Itachi.

Did you sleep last night?

You know, if something is bothering you, you can always come to me.

How are you feeling?

But even after all these efforts, it seemed as if Itachi would go into himself more and more. Yet, she would still attempt - slyly - to aid him through any difficulties he might have, and wait for him to open up.

She had tried, not to push him. Afraid of losing him even more. 

Despite her intention, she could stay patient only for so long.

It wasn´t the first time Itachi would shoot awake in the middle of the night. His long hair sticking on his sweat-laced body.

And to the woman lying next to him, it was as clear as that night that it would not be the last.

So she turned around, propping her elbow on the thin mattress to put her hand under her chin. 

Her eyes found the man´s face next to her. She couldn´t differ if the streaks on his cheeks were the sweat running down his face or maybe his tears.

“Bad dream?”, she had asked as she laid a comforting hand on his shaking back, moving up and down his backside. His ribs and spine felt even more prominent than the last time this had happened.

It would be amusing, Itachi thought as he tried to catch his breath. If the circumstances were different.

Because no. It was not a bad dream. In reality, it was one of the best dreams he had in the last few days. 

For him, being able to clearly see the woman that laid next to him - to feel and touch her, to love her - without any pain and second thoughts, was one of the best things Itachi could think of.

The night - the dreams he was in - was the only time now the man could be truly happy.

The dreams in which he would sit under the big oak tree, next to his love. 

Being able to distinguish every single leaf on the trees surrounding both of them. Being able to see the different shades of green in the grass and identify the four-leafed clover that sat in the ground next to him. 

Or being able to identify the different birds that flew through the sky, trying to chase each other.

That was not something he would call a ´bad dream´.

It was the cruel reality, that would creep on him in his dreams that would wake him so suddenly and make him such a mess.

So, he told the truth.

"No.", a little smile danced on his lips. "Don´t worry, my love."

The hand on Itachi´s back stopped in its tracks. A deep sigh reached his ears.

"Itachi...", the hand that previously was on his back moved now to his hand that laid in his lap. "Look at me, please.", the woman whispered as she laced her fingers through his.

More tears streamed down his face as he looked at her face. For him, the only thing he could distinguish were the rough outlines of her eyes.

Those eyes, he closed his ones as he remembered them. The most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.

His eyes opened the moment he felt the woman squeeze his hand.

"Please,", she breathed. "Please, don´t lie to me."

He chuckled, the motion of it brought the pain back. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.

"Believe me.", his hand reached over, grabbing her head carefully and bringing her forehead to his until they were touching. He closed his eyes once more. "I had a really good dream."

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･.･ﾟ: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆:*⋆.*･ﾟ⋆*･:*⋆.*:･ﾟ: .⋆:*

A/N: Ok, so, I have no idea if what I wrote is exactly what the two anons had requested, but I just started to write it and fell so in love with this idea. I tried to write a lot about how Itachi´s sickness would limit his normal day-to-day life and how he feels.

I hope you liked reading it. And as always: feel free to comment or write me what I could do better. Also: Submit a request if you want!

I researched a bit, about what kind of sickness it is believed he has and used the symptoms that were discribed there (If you want to read the post, just ask and I will post the link.).

Thanks for reading.