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[oocposhbee]

Sometimes people like to write things about florist’s shops.  Here are two things you need to know, the most egregiously wrong things.

1. It makes no fucking sense to sketch out a bouquet before you make it.  Every individual flower is different in a way that cannot really be adjusted the way other building materials can be adjusted, and each individual bouquet is unique.  Just put the fucking flowers together.

2. No one — in months and months of working at the flower shop — has ever cared what the flower/color of the flower means.  No one’s ever asked.  It’s just not something people tend to care about outside of fiction and it’s certainly not something most florists know.  You know what florists know?  What looks good and is thematically appropriate.

Here’s an actual list of the symbology of flowers, as professionals use it:

Yellow – for friends, hospitals Pink – girls, girlfriends, babies, bridesmaids Red – love Purple – queens White – marriage and death (DO NOT SEND TO HOSPITALS) Pink and purple – ur mum Red, orange, and yellow – ur mum if she’s stylish Red, yellow, blue – dudes and small children Blue and white – rare, probably a wedding Red and white – love for fancy bitches

Here are what the flowers actually mean to a florist:

The Fill It Out flowers:

Carnations – fuck u these are meaningless filler-flowers, not even your administrative assistant likes them, show some creativity Alstroemeria – by and large very similar to carnations but I like them better Tea roses – cute and lil and come several to a stalk, a classy filler flower Moluccella laevis – filler flower but CHOICE Delphinium – not as interesting as moluccella but purple so okay I guess Blue thistle – FUCK YEAH, some fucking textural variety at last!  you’re getting this for a dude, aren’t you? Chrysanthemums – barely better than carnations but better is still better Gladiolus – ooh, risky business, someone understands the use of the Y-axis, very good

Focal points:

Long-stem roses – yeah whatever Lilies – LBD, looks good with everything, get used as often as possible Hydrangeas – thirsty fuckers, divas of the flower world and rightly so, treat them right and they make you look good Gerbera daisies – the rose’s hippie cousin, hotter but no one admits it Peonies – CHA-CHING, everybody’s absolute favorite but you need guap Orchids – if this isn’t for a wedding you’re probably trying too hard but they’re expensive so keep ordering them

You know what matters?  THE CUSTOMER’S BUDGET.  THAT’S TELLING.

-$20 – if you’re not under 12, fuck off, get your sugar something else $30 – good for bouquets but an arrangement will be lame $40 – getting there, there’s something that can be done with that.  you can get some gerbs or roses with that and not have them look stupidly solo. $50 to $70 – tolerable $80 – FINALLY.  It sounds elitist but this really is the basic amount of money you should expect to spend on an arrangement that matters.  That’s your Mother’s Day arrangement.  You’re probably not going to spend $80 on a bouquet. $90 to $130 – THE GOOD SHIT, you’re likely to get some orchids $130+  – Weddings and death.  This amount of money gets you a memorial arrangement or a handmade bridal bouquet.  Don’t spend this on a Mother’s Day or a Babe I Love You arrangement, buy whosits a massage or something.

Miscellaneous:

Everything needs greening and if you don’t think that you’re an idiot. 

As a new employee, when you start making arrangements, you can’t see the mistakes you’re making because you’re brand new and you’re learning an art form from the ground up.

With a few exceptions customers don’t have a clear plan in mind.  They want you to develop the bouquet for them.  They want something that will delight their little sweetbread but you’re lucky if they know that person’s favorite color, let alone flower.

Flower shops don’t typically have every kind of flower in every kind of color.  Customers generally aren’t assed about that.  Most people don’t care about the precise shade of the rose or having daffodils in July, because they’re not boning up on flower language before they buy.  That would imply that they’ve got a clear bouquet in mind and, again, they don’t.

Being a florist is essentially a lot like what I imagine being a mortician is about.  You’re basically keeping dead things looking good for as long as possible.  You keep the product in the fridge so it doesn’t rot and look horrible by the time the family gets a whack at it, and in the meanwhile you put it in a nice container.

Anyway that’s flowers.

[oocposhbee]

30 Uncommon Character Development Questions ( send me a number )

edhelernil :

What position does your character sleep in? ( i.e; stomach, side, back, etc. ) Describe why they do this — optional.

Does your character have any noteworthy features? Freckles? Dimples? A scar somewhere unusual? etc.

Does your character have an accent? What does it sound like?

Do they have any verbal tics? Do they have trouble pronouncing certain words or getting their thoughts across clearly?

What are their chief tension areas? 

If you were to pick one song — and only one song — to describe your character, what would it be and why?

How does your character perceive themselves? Positive? Negative? Neutral?

Are they a quick thinker or do they need time to sort through their thoughts?

Does your character dream or are their nights filled with an empty blackness? Describe a dream they’ve had or a night they couldn’t sleep and what they did to preoccupy their time.

If they had a choice, would they prefer a subway or a bus for public transportation?

What do they think of creation? Do they believe in evolution or do they believe in God? What is their religion like?

Describe 5 unusual characteristics your muse has.

Have they ever been so overwhelmed they had to stop and take a break from something? 

Are they a team player or do they prefer to be solo?

Can they multi-task or must they focus on one subject at a time?

What are their best school subjects? What are their worst? List five of each.

Is your character an introvert or an extrovert? How do they handle big crowds of people?

Are they a leader, do they prefer to follow, or would they rather just stay on the sidelines altogether?

If your character was suddenly challenged, would they rather run away or stay and fight?

If your character was allowed to murder one person without any consequences, who would that person be and why?

Your character has been granted 3 wishes; what would they wish for and why?

Does your character trust people right off the bat or does it take them some time to warm up to someone?

Do they prefer romance or affection? What is the quickest way to your character’s heart?

Does your character have any enemies? If so, who and why?

Do they have any weird bedroom habits? Any unusual kinks?

How does your character prepare for bed? Do they sleep at all or can they stay awake for days on end without trouble?

If your character had one thing to say to their parents before they died, what would it be?

Are they afraid of death? Do they have any regrets?

Does your character get restless when things are too quiet or do they favour solitude and silence? Why?

Finally; if your character was forced to eat one thing for the rest of their life, what would they choose and why?

[oocposhbee]

@ all the bellamy muses and other pinoy muses out there: here’s a super great website of filipino models for all your aesthetic/moodboard needs

[oocposhbee]

You’re welcome

[oocposhbee]

We live together, we work together, Watson. When it comes to cases, there is no his or hers; there is partnership. I assist you, you assist me.                    Elementary (2012 - )

[oocposhbee]

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.

[oocposhbee]

Stonewall Riots + 5 Names To Know

[oocposhbee]

Recently Played - character psd 2

Is your muse a music lover? Do they write their own music? Then this psd is for you!

You can have up to 15 songs, but you can delete some if you wanna

Almost everything is editable

The only things you can’t change are the times and gradient up the top (if you can do that yourself, go for it!!)

Font is Lucida Sans, but you should have this anyway

Remember that if the album name is too long you’re going to need to use ‘…’

Please like/reblog if you’re using

[oocposhbee]

idk I just love how we Young People Today use ~improper~ punctuation/grammar in actually really defined ways to express tone without having to explicitly state tone like that’s just really fucking cool, like

no    =    “No,” she said. 

no.    =    "No,” she said sharply.

No    =    “No,” she stated firmly.

No.    =    “No,” she snapped.

NO    =    “No!” she shouted.

noooooo    =    “No,” she moaned.

no~    =    “No,” she said with a drawn-out sing-song.

~no~    =    “No,” she drawled sarcastically.

NOOOOO    =    “No!” she screamed dramatically.

no?!    =    “No,” she said incredulously.

[oocposhbee]

A note on the topic of trauma that I personally found helpful in accepting the idea that I am a trauma victim is that one of the most widely accepted facts in the field of trauma research is that abuse is often not the common factor in whether somebody will develop ptsd. 

Many people can go through awful things without developing trauma based disorders as long as they receive compassion and support in processing those events as they happen. The most common factor in developing something like ptsd is emotional neglect. And emotional neglect on it’s own can be enough. 

Whatever you went through was enough I promise, you’re not overreacting. Abuse and neglect are traumatic at any level, you don’t need to have gone through the worst possible experience you can think of to develop ptsd. If it hurt you then it hurt you.

[oocposhbee]

TRANS WOMEN: HERE'S SOME SHIT YOUR DOCTOR WONT TELL YOU ABOUT HRT

1. Progesterone: not for everyone, but for many people it may increase sex drive and WILL make your boobs bigger. Also effects mood in ways that many find positive (but some find negative). Most doctors won’t prescribe this to you unless you ask. Most trans girls I know swear by it.

2. Injectible estrogen: is more effective than pill or patch form. Get on it if you can bear needles bc you will see more effects more quickly.

3. Estradiol Cypionate: There is currently a shortage of injectible estradiol valerate. There is no shortage of estradiol cypionate. Functionally they do the same shit.

4. Bicalutamide: This is an anti-androgen that has almost none of the side-effects of spironolactone or finasteride. The girls I know who are on it are evangelical about it.

[oocposhbee]

If you ever think a video game you’re playing is facetious, instead consider EarthBound:

About three quarters through the game, the player finds a weapon called the Casey Bat. It is the strongest weapon in the game by a large margin, so naturally the player will equip it to Ness instantly. What isn’t indicated, though, is that it has a 75% miss rate. Players are often bewildered by the fact that at a certain point in the game, Ness suddenly becomes incapable of hitting anything.

The player is at one point given the option to buy an egg. The egg does nothing. But it will randomly hatch into a chick without notifying the player. While a chick is in the player’s inventory, a beeping sound will play constantly. There is no indication of why this is happening.

A boss called the Clumsy Robot has a move where it eats a bolonge sandwich. The text prompt will say that it recovers an enormous, demoralising amount of HP from doing this. It actually does nothing. The text prompt is lying.

At one point the player is given the option to buy a machine from an inventor. They are told they need the machine to progress in the game. It is incredibly expensive. The machine isn’t needed for anything at all, and it breaks when you use it.

To get into one of the villains’ lair, you have to know the secret password. The secret password is five minutes of silence. You have to stand in front of the door into the lair for five minutes without doing anything, then you will be allowed in.

Fuck your noise. EarthBound went hard.

[oocposhbee]

SUBMISSION

Homemade Thin Mints (recipe)

Homemade Thin Mints are just like the real thing! Crisp mint chocolate cookies coated in chocolate. They taste amazing! These cookies are easy to make and everyone will rave about them. The perfect balance between mint and chocolate will have you reaching for cookie after cookie. The dough can be made ahead and frozen or the fully baked cookies can be frozen for a quick snack.

Cookie noms.

[oocposhbee]

in addition to my last post, feel free to grab me on kik at holmes.couture (don’t forget the dot in the middle) to rp also. like i said, i rp as sherlock, usually modern ACD or my own adaptation (info here), but i’m totally open to working with your bbc muses. main ships are holmescest & seblock (moran/holmes) but i’m flexible

[oocposhbee]

Looking for Holmescest RPs

Hey guys! I write Sherlock and I’m looking for someone who’s into writing Mycroft for some Holmescest rps since omegle is down. You can email me at submergedlibrarian@gmail.com if you’re interested, and we can talk plot! Up for anything from plotless smut to long-term au stories.

[oocposhbee]

blood is not kosher

assuming vampires breathe, and are therefore alive, what do they do

[oocposhbee]

tumblr user, drinking a bottle of uncontaminated water in post apocalyptic america: i love this?? this is so pure omg