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[outsider06]

Dally would also fw Skillet imo; they’re kinda iffy in my book, but I feel like he’d like them, Guns N’ Roses, Korn, some of Type O Negative, and early Iron Maiden albums like Self titled, Killers, number of the beast, fear of the dark, and somewhere in time

modern dally would fw eminem i think. and i ofc gotta push my kendrick lamar loving dally onto here too. maybe steve would like the former if we’re pushing but idk

[outsider06]

SODA’S REACTION-

‼️ WARNING ‼️

Some angst and self depreciation, depression, and talks on death

“Well damn, pony..”

After Darry’d read it, Soda did, and then he understood why Darry had been so emotional. He does this thing if he sees one of us cry, he just starts too- even without meaning to or a reason to, he just does. He shook his head after wiping stray tears from his face. “You hit the nail on the head for me, kid, more so the ending than the beginning.”

I looked at him, startled, “I did? I mean, I was going for hypothetical and situational stuff when I was writing- I-I’d bullshitted the entire first chapter, and then I just kept going and I jus-“

“Pony,” he put his hand on my shoulder. “Breathe kid. I’d explain it if you’d let me finish. And you’re shakin’ like a leaf.” I hadn’t realized it, but when I did I took a shaky breath and nodded at him. He nodded slightly before continuing, “you was right about most of that- the way me and Sandy were was rocky when you were writing it, so I can understand where you were goin’ with that, but I’m not nearly as good as you put me as in that.”

“Well, I mean,” I stuttered, trying to word it without making it sound belittling, “…I put it how I see you- you’re emotionally smart and good at what you love, maybe not school like me, but everybody around our side always comes to you when they need something with cars, or mechanics, an extra set a’ hands, and stuff like at’, so…”

“Well, sure, but that’s all I seem to be good at. That’s all people ever come to me about, and they don’t see beyond that, it seems… I just thought… well- never-mind, kid it’s nothin’,” he ran his hands through his hair, and I just looked at him. His features were still chiseled and handsome, but there was sadness and longing written all over him, holding himself back like a horse on a fences edge, pacing himself to finally let himself be free. I knew he wouldn’t speak more on it, and I wasn’t gonna push him, so I leaned on him, put my head in his shoulder.

“You, know you’re more than just that, though, right?” I asked gently, but there was a long moment of silence in the air, longer than I hoped there would be. “…Sodapop?”

“… it don’t feel that way most the time…” I barely heard him. I didn’t have to look at him to tell he was crying again, and I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, squeezing. His voice broke me as he spoke, “…I can’t see it. I don’t see it, at all, the way you do, Pony. The way any of em’ see it. The gang sees me the way I let em’ see it, and no-one bothers to ask otherwise… except for you and Steve, but you do because you’re my brother and you can tell- Steve takes longer, but he does, but that’s just all it is. No-one sees how I am, bad enough Sandy doesn’t even try right now because of our last argument, but still. I hoped they would’ve.. but I guess not.”

“But that ain’t true- we all see it-“

“No ya don’t, kid, an’ the last time anyone did was when they died, that was it! I had to stay that happy bastard that they’re all used to seeing so they could all have that in their lives. It may have been our parents that died, but the truly happy part of me went with em’.. I just, I’unno, just kept it so they wouldn’t have to deal with me mopin’ around, and then they got used to it so I had to keep it up or they would’ve caught me bein’ weak..” he rested his head in his hands and cried. I just sat there hugging him, shushing and rubbing his shoulders, and for a moment he leaned back into me. He let himself out for the first time in months, and I could sense him feeling lighter. He sat up and laid his head back on the wall, looking up while blinking tears out of his eyes, and sighed.

I moved my arm from around him to rest it on his arm, as he reached and squeezed my hand. “You know I’m here if you need me. Darry is too, and Steve, and two, and Johnny, and, hell, even Dally whether we like it or not, most of the time, but we’ll listen to you when you need us to. We’re more than happy to talk with you.”

“I-I know, but I just… I don’wanna burden y’all,” he looked at me, sad frustration threatening to shatter his bronze gaze. “We all got our own problems, some of em worse than mine, like Johnny’s. His parents beatin’ on him and making him feel like nothin’, Steve’s dad telling’ Jim to get out at least once a week and then giving him a few bucks to make up for it, two and his kid sister and takin’ care a’ her and his mom, with god knows what goin’ on with Dally, I don’t wanna put more onto that than there already is.

“But you’re not, Soda.” I leaned back in his shoulder, “you’re just as important as everyone and you’re problems are just as worthy of talk as the rest of ours. You’re not a burden, Sodapop,” and he sighed again, holding my hand tighter as the sun dipped below the horizon.

“You’re not.”

@alaskan-wallflower @sobertwobit @fictionalcharactergraveyard @urlocalnonbinarybastard and anyone else

If you have problems, talk to ones you feel comfortable talking to :)

I saw this and I refuse to view it any differently now.

@alaskan-wallflower

[outsider06]

Played gartic phone for the first time yesterday

[outsider06]

@alaskan-wallflower Yeah, I channeled some of my own issues into that, some of the dialogue is based on what’s happened to me in all honesty

I saw this and I refuse to view it any differently now.

@alaskan-wallflower

[outsider06]

:D

I saw this and I refuse to view it any differently now.

@alaskan-wallflower

[outsider06]

Aight here we go-

angst! ahead, as well as yelling and mention of the hit- happy ending because yes

When Darry first read what I had written for him- it gave him a bitter-sweet but revitalizing realization. As he read, he saw how I viewed him as cold-hearted and stoic in the beginning, but warmer and more attentive in the end. He was brought to tears at the way I wrote about him- slowly making him more emotional as the essay continued. When he finished, he hastily wiped his face, and looked me in the eyes…

“I didn’t realize I was like that to you, Pony… whatever I did… I was trying to help you, kid, I-” he began to cry for the first time I could remember. “I don’t know, man, g-goddamnit—!” He kept we wiping his eyes, red and raw as silver tears still lined them. “Do I actually come across that way to you?”

“…yeah. …it was worse when mom and dad died..” my eyes shifted as I saw soda leaning on the wall next to me- tears were in his eyes too, understanding us both. “I guess I found writing it as a way to get it down without making a fuss between us. Made me feel like I could communicate with you instead of starting a screaming match..” my voice low and cautious, I looked at him. “Did you realize what you were doing at first?”

I half expected him to snap his head up at me and shout in defense, like usual, but he didn’t. For the first time in a long time, he didn’t. He looked from me, to Soda, then shut his eyes and shook his head, bracing it in his hand. I barely hear him mumble a “no” before he stood up suddenly. I stood up too, not wanting to feel small, and just looked at him. I read his face, and saw the same face I saw after we got home from the funeral. All three of us stood in silence before he looked up again, adjusting his stance and hitching his thumbs in his pockets. His tears were gone now, but his eyes were still puffy and red. He’s fighting them now, I thought, but then he reached out and dragged me into him. He squeezed hard and buried his head in my shoulder. I stood there, dumbfounded, with my hands just hovering in the air for a moment, and the next I realized that I had hugged him back, my own tears beginning to fall.

“I’d hope that I never would hit you, Pony.. I don’wanna get it to that point at all, but I just don’know what to do other than work and take care of you too. Yall are all I got left, yall and the gang, and that’s it, it feels like. I means, sure I got friends outside of here an’ all, but it ain’t us. It don’t feel like us, kid, it’s not the same… I wanna do what I have to in order to keep us here, and keep food in the table and a roof in our heads and a buncha other shit I don’t want yall to worry about. bad enough Soda dropped out just to help me, an has to work just as much as I do to keep it here, but there’s just…” he screwed his eyes shut, “there so much complicated shit, and it don’t help that we always get the shit end of the stick… I just want things to go right for us for once…”

We just stood there for a while as I felt his shoulders shaking again, my own tears beginning to fall. He patted my shoulder a couple times before standing straight and holding me by the shoulders.

“T-the ending… that’s what I wanna do for us kid.” He let go on one side and waved his hand in Soda’s direction. “All three of us. I don’t want y’all thinking that I’m gonna hark on you all the time. I’m trying to keep us together. Maybe it’s my jobs, or maybe it’s Two and Steve being shitheads in my damn house all the goddamn time, I don’know, I’ll figure it out, but just-“ he took a breath,” just let me get it don’t for you two. I feel like I’ve gotta do it for you cuz that’s what mama and dad woulda wanted me to, I’ve just- I’ve gotta-“

“Darry.” Soda finally spoke, looking between the both of us. “Y’gotta do it for you, too.” His voice was steady, but his eyes were pleading. “We appreciate you and everything you do, but if you don’t do it for you, that’s when the anger starts and we all end up screamin’.” He looked at me, “we can’t have that for any longer, or god knows what’ll happen to us.” He raised his eyebrows at me, rustling the back of my hair while grinning, “An’ you’ve gotta stop instigatin’, ya lil shit.”

After a while I nodded slowly, and cocked my head to the side a little, a knowing smirk on my face. “Yeah..” I wiped my face, “I guess.”

“And you shouldn’t have to be a mediator,” Darry looked at Soda, giving his shoulder a squeeze, “me an’ Pony’ll figure out stuff out or step away, or somethin’, but y’not getting out in the middle no more.”

“We’ll see how long that lasts” soda and I jumped and whipped our heads to where we heard Two-Bit, Darry wiping his eyes as fast as he could before huffing,

“and how long have you been there?”

“An hour.”

“An hour??” Sodas brows furrowed.

“I’ve been standing so incredibly still, that my movements have become invisible to the eye. Watch..” he slowly raised his handful of cake to his mouth.

“You’re eating our cake again-“

“But my movements are so slow, that you can’t tell him here..”

“Mmm, no, we can see you,” Darry shook his head.

“I’m sure I’m invisible-“

“Hey Two!” Steve barked, poking his head in from the screen door.

“Dammit,” he slurred, staggering over to the door shoving cake in his mouth.

lmao the opportunity was perfect💀

@alaskan-wallflower @sobertwobit and anyone else interested, soda will be up soon🤞🏾

I saw this and I refuse to view it any differently now.

@alaskan-wallflower

[outsider06]

In the midst of what I’m gonna call the Essay!AU of The Outsiders, I have a little bit of a confession to make; I have three separate copy’s of the book- my original, my sister’s that she gave to me, and my mint- each one is more jacked up than the last and I find it kinda funny but also kinda sad too, just reminiscing on how much it really affected me. I love the book dearly and I’m gonna get my first major tattoo to commemorate it.

Love S.E. Hinton and her works so much and I look forward to y’all’s reactions when its complete🤘🏾🦇🖤

[outsider06]

Aight yall, buckle the fuckle up-

We gonna go in order in which the gang was introduced: Pony, Darry, Soda, Steve, Two-Bit, Dally, then Johnny- I didn’t expect so many ppl to like it, so I’ll do my due diligence to not disappoint 🫡

I saw this and I refuse to view it any differently now.

@alaskan-wallflower

[outsider06]

Already on it- finna make it the gangs reactions to their storylines 🫡

I saw this and I refuse to view it any differently now.

@alaskan-wallflower

[outsider06]

I saw this and I refuse to view it any differently now.

@alaskan-wallflower

[outsider06]

ME TOO- AMERICAN BEAUTY//AMERICAN PSYCHO WAS MY GO TO FOB ALBUM, that and Mania, and god save rock and roll >:]>

Any music recommendations

YES

Hozier. Specifically the album called Hozier. Work Sing, To Be Alone and Someone New go HARD. Too Sweet too—I don’t get why people clown on that song, it’s actually really good

Billy Joel. He’s been a fav of mine since I was a little kid. Vienna, Uptown Girl and We Didn’t Start the Fire specifically, they’re my favorites and have been since I was like six years old lol (funny story but when i was like five or six i was obsessed with we didn’t start the fire and kept only repeating the “jfk blown away what else do i have to say” part while with my family in massachusetts…not the best idea lol, but that song still hits. it’s like don’t stop believin’, you revisit it after a few years and it’s like “wow this is actually pretty alright!”i had a problem with repeating things as a kid tho lol0

U2. Specifically MLK. Love that song, it was my top played two years ago and it’s an awesome song

Aerosmith—the Big Ones album has some really good songs that I love a lot

Anything by Michael Jackson hits hard. That’s kinda generic but he’s another artist i listened to a lot as a little kid with my dad so it’s special to me

Flight of the Silverbird—it’s straight up instrumental but it’s very good to run to. It’s currently my top played but we’ll see if it stays there lol

Nicole Dollanganger—her songs deal with more sensitive subjects, but her songs make me feel better sometimes, even if a lot of her songs are more morbid

The American Beauty/American Psycho album by Fall Out Bit is great imo—The Kids Aren’t Alright, American Beauty/American Psycho, Novocaine and Jet Pack Blues especially

Yaelokre is pretty good—And the Hound and Harpy Hare are my favorites

Nickelback is surprisingly alright—just alright. Not great, not terrible, just alright. Rockstar hits different after cleaning up a fourth of July party if that makes sense lol

I think that’s it? My music taste is kinda shit so maybe i’m not the best person to ask but I appreciate the sentiment haha

[outsider06]

Ever since I saw that video of the nazi getting kicked out of the punk concert my faith in the US has been restored

[outsider06]

STARTING TOMORROW

Scientists in weather and climate are live streaming for 100 hours to make their case to the American public.

They are live streaming, but engagement is necessary for it to work. SHARE THIS WITH PEOPLE, RECORD THE STREAM, POST CLIPS OF IT THAT ARE FUNNY, if you can tune in, PLEASE DO!

This is something that has to be heard by as many people as possible. Put it on in the background! See if you can get other people to watch it! Do whatever you can do support those who are trying to be supported! Anything and everything helps!

TUNE IN HERE

article I posted screenshots of here

[outsider06]

Thx for the tag :D

Fav color? Black, gold, indigo, and cyan- putting all hose colors together a masterpiece

Last song played? Road to Hell by Bruce Dickinson; I do this thing where I image my ocs in cool situations in an animated music video format, and all I can see is one of them standing on a motorcycle steering with one of their feet, standing in spread eagle with their eyes closed and singing the final chorus during a drag race at dusk…. I’ll draw that eventually

Currently reading: the outsiders for the 323rd time, and my junji ito collection

Currently watching: how the universe works bc I like the scenarios they come up with

Currently craving: a hug/ laying on someone while taking a nap- not doing too great rn, ill be honest

Coffee or tea: Tea bc earl grey is my favorite and it tastes like fancy fruit loops

No pressure; reboot if u want :)

@urlocalnonbinarybastardwrites @urlocalnonbinarybastard @gone-with-the-windrixville @kaspavanlortsyal @spikedhe4rt @quarotch @fictionalcharactergraveyard @nutsackx

favorite color — green but i also love brown and purple

last song — rule #44: badger by fish in a birdcage

currently reading — this is where it ends by marieke nijkamp

currently watching — final fantasy: unlimited (again) (no one is surprised)

currently craving — something salty and some coffee

coffee or tea — BOTH

thanks for the tag @starfall-reef !!

i tag.... um. @korya-elana @okiimii @avonsdrabbles @artisticdysfunction @cavityinmybrain @heliflower @thefluxsystem @/idkhowtomakeaname and anyone else who wants to do it!!!

[outsider06]

My favorite thing is seeing them complain about shit that happened and learning that it was trump that caused the shit lol

my favorite pastime is watching maga/trump supporters getting asked about trumps pilicies and why they support said policies and they come up blank because they don’t know what a fucking tariff is, let alone anything about politics as a whole. they genuinely have no clue what they’re talking about, but it’s become such a cult at this point that he could literally tell them to inject bleach into their veins and they’d do it.

oh wait.

[outsider06]

Yall I forgor abd an edgy drawing I did after discovering Outside by Staind

[outsider06]

A closer look at my hilt :D

I have an elemental hilt from Savi’s forge at Disney World- other than the purple juicer Krystal, I have a yellow and white one, when I go back, I’m gonna try to get all of them