pansexy-choices-the-sequal
pansexy-choices-the-sequal
Angel Darling
109 posts
My RPG side blog where (almost) all my MCs are author inserts >\\\\\- my previous blog @pansexy-choices got shadowbanned
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Beckett Harrington - a giveaway prize for @pixelhoe-aisha
taglist: @astainedrose @beaumontbash @moonrisedreams
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Not only is “The Nanny Affair” MC a badass, sex positive, feminist, woman and mom in STEM with a doctorate but her outfits slay 99% of the time
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No matter how cringey the plot of the first book is, she’s the best Choices MC, fight me. I’m replaying TNA expect a billion pictures drawn of this sweet girl because I love drawing powerful women in awesome outfits.
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fine whatever
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Finally started playing Red Carpet Diaries seriously and spending loads of diamonds on outfits and adventures so my baddie can live her best life.
Anyways meet Star. Yes, I named her Star.
Pronouns:She/Her (Cis woman)
Sexuality: Panromantic Heterosexual
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Yes the sequins took forever but they were worth it.
@choicespride
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This art style
Happy Pride Month
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IDK what kinda café can't afford lighting but whatever
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More Ballerina Angel
Angel binds their chest with a binder/T-Tape in lieu of a sports bra when they dance/exercise. They don’t often feel dysphoric because their breasts are naturally small, but their chest dysphoria acts up when they move around a lot and they’re more conscious of their breasts - cause y’know, physics, bouncing, etc.
And yes, Angel has a tattoo of Jane’s name on their left arm. It’s surrounded by forget-me-not flowers.
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Bonus: Fiance reaction
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Haha
@choicespride
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Redraw!
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Redraw of a picture I drew 4-ish years ago of Andy in @ratanslily ‘s edit of this trans pride sweatshirt - that they also made 4-ish years ago Featuring: Angel giving him neck kisses. Andy’s hand looks a little weird here, but I’ve still improved loads since then!
BTW: I would appreciate if you did not go seeking out my old Andy x MC account as that MC has my old name that I don’t use anymore XD
@choicespride
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Honestly I love the fact that the Male MCs are “female coded”. Very anti-toxic masculinity. The scene where HSS male MC gets ready with all the girls for homecoming so their Male LI can surprise them is so wholesome.
Also guys can just like feminine things? Like it’s not “female coded” or whatever for Male MC to like wearing a tux with flowers on it. Guys can just like flowers.
There's something so very privileged about male MC players complaining about books forcefemming their male MC and that being "female coding" as if female MCs don't get forcefemmed all the fucking time too
Like I have zero sympathy that you're upset COP masc MC had a premium special wedding hair that's a bun with flowers in book 3. Complain about some of the actual issues in that book and some of the actual gender coding issues in PB stories. And if you're gonna advocate for more masculine options for MCs, make sure that includes female MCs too or else your advocacy is worthless.
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Kicking Off Pride with some soft boy hours: Helluva Boss merch but with Andy and Angel
Happy Pride Y’all
(Reference photo beneath the cut)
@choicespride Prompt: Kink
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I love Beezelbub and Vortex so much and I knew I had to draw Andy and Angel in this pose!
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I have been grossly neglecting Tomoichi and Angie in my recent It Lives hyperfixation so we ending the night on some cuddles.
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@choicesmonthlychallenge Prompt: Sharing a blanket way too small for two people.
It got hot so they gave up on the tiny blanket altogether.
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Rebooting for @choicesmonthlychallenge May challenge! Prompt: Confessions. Yes, by technicality i made this in May❤️❤️❤️
Probably gonna make some fanart of this at some point
No One Can Take You From Me
Series: It Lives in the Woods
Pairing: Andy x Angel
Summary: This is what I canon happened after Andy and MC had their first kiss in Britney's pool. AKA after math of "What do you say we go borrow Britney's laundry room for a bit, maybe find some cozy blankets to wrap up in while our clothes dry?"
Genre: Fluff. There's some shirtlessness but this is NOT MEANT TO BE NSFW. MC may be canonically an adult at the beginning of the book, but we never get confirmation if Andy is or not
Tags: @choicesapril2025 @choicesmonthlychallenge prompts-New Beginnings, Old Feelings: Reuniting after years apart.
Note: If people are interested I can post a version with (Y/N) or (MC) so people can insert their own MCs!
The two of you skirt past the crowd in search of Britney’s laundry room, trying your best to not trail water on the floor. Andy has a hand clasped firmly on yours as he leads you through the throng.
“This should be it,” He says, nudging open a door tucked in a corner on the first floor. The room’s small but comfortable, with a washer, dryer, sink, and clothes line for delicates. You shuffle inside after Andy and lock the door behind you, suddenly conscious of the mass of party goers outside. Your diffidence spikes further as you realize what’s supposed to happen next. It isn’t practical to awkwardly stand here in your freezing, drenched clothes until they dry, but you hadn’t exactly thought it through when you agreed to sneak off with Andy earlier. He, thankfully, breaches the topic first,
“You okay, Ang? You look a little tense.”
“Oh! I’m fine… just cold. Uh- Is it okay if I take off my clothes in front of you?” The question comes out of you in a rushed breath.
“Ha! How prudish do you think I am?” Andy teases, “You’ll catch a cold if you keep wearing your wet clothes.” A beat of silence ensues, he rubs the back of his neck, a nervous look breaks out across his face, then,
“Actually, if anything I should ask…. do you mind if I take my chest binder off?”
“Huh?”
“You’re not supposed to wear binders wet. It’s bad for you.”
“Oh!” Immediately, you turn your back to him, “Of course.” You hear him breathe a laugh through his nose, perhaps he thinks it’s silly how cautious you’re being. 
It’s true that you both aren’t cis, theoretically there shouldn’t be any problem. But it’s different for him, you know this. You never had to worry too much about your body changing and warping in ways you didn’t want it to. It was pretty clear early on that your chest wasn’t going to fill out, and you didn’t mind your slender shoulders or the curve of your hips as a gender nonconforming person.
There’s faint shuffling behind you, then the opening of a closet door, you keep your focus trained solely on yourself and your own soaked attire. 
“I found some towels,” Andy says from behind you, “there’s only one blanket though. Hope you don’t mind sharing.” He notices your refusal to turn, and his voice softens,
“It’s fine, Ang. You can look at me.” 
“Oh….. okay,” You turn and open your eyes slowly. Andy stands casually with a blanket draped over his broad shoulders in nothing but his briefs. His clothes are splayed out on the washing machine beside him air drying. He gives you a sheepish look,
“Is this….. okay?” 
“Yeah. It’s fine.”
He opens his arms so the blanket unfurls and gestures for you to duck under with him. You keep your eyes trained on his as you move forward, stopping a few inches short of him so that you don’t quite touch. Andy backs away a little,
“Sorry, I don’t mean to make you do anything you don’t want to.”
“No no no no, I’m fine. I just uh…..” You wring your hands together, “… are you?”
To your surprise, Andy chuckles, “You don’t have to be so afraid, Ang. I trust you.” You flush, biting your lip in concern,
“Really? You’re sure you’re comfortable with this, Andy?” 
“Why wouldn’t I be? You’ve never seen me as anything other than what I am.” The sincerity and trust in his eyes is enough to make you fall to pieces. There is truth to that statement. Even before he realized he was trans, when he felt unsatisfied with his identity but didn’t have the words to describe it, you were the one he always turned to. When his hair was long and he felt uncomfortable with how his mom had braided it, he’d always come to you asking you to undo it. You’d tie it up and tuck it all under a baseball cap for him. When he was upset because his parents picked out dresses for him to wear on picture days, you’d come to school with an extra set of clothes for him to change into afterwards. When someone would call him by his full birth name as a child, you’d notice him recoil when no one else would, and against your shy nature you’d speak,
“They prefer Andy.” If your timid voice was lost in the wind, you’d repeat it like a record until everyone heard.
These were small acts in the grand scheme of things, but your consistent willingness to make him as confident and happy as he could possibly be without ever stopping to interrogate him forged an ineffable bond between you two. One that seems to have endured even after all those years of estrangement.
Remembering all this, you feel a surge of assurance and step into the embrace of his arms with a soft smile. He immediately clasps his arms around you in a hug, engulfing you with warmth. You yelp as he pulls you to the floor with him so you’re nested in his lap. Against yourself, you flush as the firm planes of his toned body press against yours. You hadn’t been this close to him since you were kids - when you’d wrestle and learn to do cartwheels together and fall asleep against each other watching movies. It was different then, you’re grown up now. You’d just kissed. If you close your eyes, you could still feel him on your lips.
Your blush intensifies as Andy rests his hand atop your head and nestles you in the crook of his neck. You worry that he’ll feel how hot your face has grown. His skin is smooth and soft against yours. You’re so overwhelmed by how safe and comfortable you are that it makes you sleepy.
“You feel so good in my arms,” Andy murmurs against your hair, “you’re so warm.” You let out a contented hum. The tranquility around you both is astonishingly comfortable; neither of you feel pressured to fill the silence. 
Andy shifts a little, careful not to disturb you and leans closer. His gaze rakes over you adoringly, almost like he can’t believe you’re there with him. Your eyes widen a little as he swoops down to nuzzle his face against your neck.
“Are we there yet?” He asks suddenly, you give him a puzzled look.
“There?”
“Like….. Can I kiss you?” This time, you’re the one who laughs.
“Why wouldn’t you? We just did ten minutes ago.”
“I mean….” His face turns bashful, “Can I kiss you everywhere? Like…. Your neck and stuff?”
“Oh!” You can’t help the trace of eagerness in your voice, “Yeah. I’d really like that.” Andy breaks into a relieved smile,
“Awesome.”
Keeping his arm wrapped around your shoulders and using his freehand to cup your face, he brushes his lips against your forehead first. He presses a kiss to your temple next, then your cheek. Your eyes flutter shut and he sweeps two kisses over your lashes. He blazes a trail down your face, over your jaw, down your neck, and to your shoulders, stopping mid way to nip at your ear. A shuddery sigh slips from you involuntarily, and you almost melt from embarrassment,
“Crap, sorry!” You say burying your face in your hands. Andy laughs,
“You’re so fricken cute.” This makes you blush even harder, “You don’t have to say sorry for feeling good - just means I’m doing a good job.” Andy gives you a cheeky grin, you smirk in response and a surge of confidence overtakes you. It occurs to you then, gazing at his dazzling smile, how much you want to spoil him in return. All the years spent apart when he was tormented by others at school and you were too traumatized from Jane’s death to reach out to him again. You want to devour him, give him everything he deserves and more - to make up for lost time.
“Humph, well mind if I return the favor?” You say. Impossibly, Andy’s eyes light up even brighter.
“That’d be awesome. Just…” he rubs his nape shyly, “keep it above the collar.”
“Of course.” You reach up to run your fingers through his damp hair before trailing them down the sharp lines of his jaw, savoring the sight of him. He nuzzles into your hand and you take advantage of the new angle and place an open mouthed kiss to his pulse point. You playfully nibble his ear lobe next, where his piercing is, making him giggle. Your kisses are slower than his, deliberate and lingering. You shift so you’re straddling him and continue trailing down his neck. His hand goes to the small of your back, pressing you evermore closer.
“Mmmmm,” he moans, leaning into your touch. You take a moment then, to pull back and press your forehead against his. His dark brown eyes are glassy in an adorable, dopey, star struck way. Your heart stutters at the acknowledgement that that look’s for you.
“The mighty King Kang on his knees for a dorky, art nerd,” You tease, “little tiny childhood Angel is freaking out right now.” 
“Imagine how little tiny Andy feels.” Andy says back, you chuckle.
“Probably weirded out. I don’t think anyone like you would’ve imagined they’d end up with someone like me.” Andy cocks an eyebrow at you, perplexed.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” 
“We didn’t  really make sense on paper back then. I was always a people pleasing doormat as a kid and you…. Were everything but that.” The look Andy gives you is confused and incredulous.
“Ang, I’ve liked liked you ever since we were little kids.” He says. The breath leaves you all at once; something in your chest clenches. The shock must show on your face because Andy continues,
“You didn’t notice? Everyone else said it was pretty obvious.” You take a moment to reflect on this; Scenes from your childhood together rewind in your mind’s eye in a new light. You recall suddenly, that whenever you got picked on by other kids, Andy would come rushing to your side before anyone else, before Jane even. It wasn’t just when you were getting harassed either, it was whenever you were scared at all. When your friends wanted to watch scary movies, when you were too afraid to ask the adults for something, when you had nightmares during your sleepovers. You remember the warmth of his hand curling around yours, how he’d tuck you protectively behind him even though he was shorter at the time.
You just assumed he was like that with everyone - that it was just in his nature to be brave when he saw someone cowardly like you.
But you see it in his vulnerable expression, it’s true. You were Andy Kang’s first love.
“But if everyone else knew …. Why didn’t you say anything to me?” You say once you find your voice again.
“Well, I didn’t know it was a crush until years later… and we were all split up by then,” his expression grows more guarded, “It was also… after I realized ….  And I just… I just thought - no one would want me like that, after….” His voice breaks a little as he trails off. Your heart cracks at the noise.
There’s so much to be said. You want to tell him how hilariously absurd and ironic this all is. Because you loved him before you even completely understood what that meant. You knew that he was different from the moment you met him, and you never gave a damn. You fell for him because he was daring and bold and kind. That didn’t change once he transitioned. But all you manage is,
“Oh…” everything else catches in your throat, “Oh, Andy…” You wrap your arms around his shoulders and tuck your face into the crook of his neck. He hugs you back fiercely, releasing a shaky breath against your nape. You try to communicate everything you want to say through the embrace alone; you want it all to penetrate his bones and pierce through his soul so that he’d know as long as you exist someone will always want him as he is.
“Bet when I said ‘I’d been wanting to do that for a while’ you didn’t expect this huh?” Despite Andy’s effort to break the tension, you hear the uncertainty in his voice. It makes you think back to what he said after he kissed you for the first time.
I guess I just like you a lot and I was scared you wouldn’t feel the same.
Andy Kang. The boy who wasn’t afraid of anything - Not of scraping his knees to conquer the tallest climbing tree he could find, not of coming out to a conservative town in the middle of Oregon, not of fighting monsters in the woods to save his friends. The bravest person you’d ever met, Andy Kang, feared losing you.
“Andy,” you pull back and cradle his face in your hands, “the years apart are over now. I’ve wanted you for so long…. If you’ll have me, then I’m yours - and no one can take me away from you.” You fluster as the words leave your mouth - somehow that all sounded less nauseatingly cheesy in your head. You expect him to laugh at you - to poke fun of how you could say something so tender to someone you’d reconnected with for less than a month. But he just gazes at you with the most reverent look in his eyes.
“No one can take you away from me.”
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pansexy-choices-the-sequal · 2 months ago
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Canon fact: Andy’s had a crush on Angel ever since they were little kids, but Angel was always closer to Jane (friend wise) so Andy thought Angel was crushing on Jane
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Angel, also had a crush on Andy ever since they were kids, but Andy was closer to Tom (friend wise), so Ang always thought Andy had feelings for Tom
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They laugh about it now. But poor kiddos were heart broken at the time
@choicesmonthlychallenge prompt: Jealousy
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pansexy-choices-the-sequal · 2 months ago
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Why do you dress fem if you’re trans masc?
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pansexy-choices-the-sequal · 2 months ago
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This hug is dedicated to @lover-also-fighter-also and
@aallotarenunelma too
April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month
Message of solidarity from ILITW Angel and Me (IRL Angel). Things get better and you’re not alone. Tell your story to anyone and everyone who will listen. Heal in whichever way you want, you don’t owe anyone anything.
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TW: SA Story below the cut
About two years ago I was molested by a trans woman in my sleep while she was drunk and less than a year later I was r*ped by my ex-fiancée who was a trans woman. I unfortunately developed a fear of trans feminine people which led to me detransitioning (from trans masc to woman) as I no longer felt safe in the trans community and felt as though I would never have. Place in the world if I continued yo present the way I did. It’s gotten better. I still ave no idea what I am and how I fit into the world, things don’t feel completely good or right when I call mayself a girl. But mentally, I’m not as bad as before, and I’m eternally grateful.
ILITW Angel’s survival story is loosely based off of mine. He was r*ped by someone he met when he was sent to conversion therapy by his birth parents.
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pansexy-choices-the-sequal · 2 months ago
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No One Can Take You From Me
Series: It Lives in the Woods
Pairing: Andy x Angel
Summary: This is what I canon happened after Andy and MC had their first kiss in Britney's pool. AKA after math of "What do you say we go borrow Britney's laundry room for a bit, maybe find some cozy blankets to wrap up in while our clothes dry?"
Genre: Fluff. There's some shirtlessness but this is NOT MEANT TO BE NSFW. MC may be canonically an adult at the beginning of the book, but we never get confirmation if Andy is or not
Tags: @choicesapril2025 @choicesmonthlychallenge prompts-New Beginnings, Old Feelings: Reuniting after years apart.
Note: If people are interested I can post a version with (Y/N) or (MC) so people can insert their own MCs!
The two of you skirt past the crowd in search of Britney’s laundry room, trying your best to not trail water on the floor. Andy has a hand clasped firmly on yours as he leads you through the throng.
“This should be it,” He says, nudging open a door tucked in a corner on the first floor. The room’s small but comfortable, with a washer, dryer, sink, and clothes line for delicates. You shuffle inside after Andy and lock the door behind you, suddenly conscious of the mass of party goers outside. Your diffidence spikes further as you realize what’s supposed to happen next. It isn’t practical to awkwardly stand here in your freezing, drenched clothes until they dry, but you hadn’t exactly thought it through when you agreed to sneak off with Andy earlier. He, thankfully, breaches the topic first,
“You okay, Ang? You look a little tense.”
“Oh! I’m fine… just cold. Uh- Is it okay if I take off my clothes in front of you?” The question comes out of you in a rushed breath.
“Ha! How prudish do you think I am?” Andy teases, “You’ll catch a cold if you keep wearing your wet clothes.” A beat of silence ensues, he rubs the back of his neck, a nervous look breaks out across his face, then,
“Actually, if anything I should ask…. do you mind if I take my chest binder off?”
“Huh?”
“You’re not supposed to wear binders wet. It’s bad for you.”
“Oh!” Immediately, you turn your back to him, “Of course.” You hear him breathe a laugh through his nose, perhaps he thinks it’s silly how cautious you’re being. 
It’s true that you both aren’t cis, theoretically there shouldn’t be any problem. But it’s different for him, you know this. You never had to worry too much about your body changing and warping in ways you didn’t want it to. It was pretty clear early on that your chest wasn’t going to fill out, and you didn’t mind your slender shoulders or the curve of your hips as a gender nonconforming person.
There’s faint shuffling behind you, then the opening of a closet door, you keep your focus trained solely on yourself and your own soaked attire. 
“I found some towels,” Andy says from behind you, “there’s only one blanket though. Hope you don’t mind sharing.” He notices your refusal to turn, and his voice softens,
“It’s fine, Ang. You can look at me.” 
“Oh….. okay,” You turn and open your eyes slowly. Andy stands casually with a blanket draped over his broad shoulders in nothing but his briefs. His clothes are splayed out on the washing machine beside him air drying. He gives you a sheepish look,
“Is this….. okay?” 
“Yeah. It’s fine.”
He opens his arms so the blanket unfurls and gestures for you to duck under with him. You keep your eyes trained on his as you move forward, stopping a few inches short of him so that you don’t quite touch. Andy backs away a little,
“Sorry, I don’t mean to make you do anything you don’t want to.”
“No no no no, I’m fine. I just uh…..” You wring your hands together, “… are you?”
To your surprise, Andy chuckles, “You don’t have to be so afraid, Ang. I trust you.” You flush, biting your lip in concern,
“Really? You’re sure you’re comfortable with this, Andy?” 
“Why wouldn’t I be? You’ve never seen me as anything other than what I am.” The sincerity and trust in his eyes is enough to make you fall to pieces. There is truth to that statement. Even before he realized he was trans, when he felt unsatisfied with his identity but didn’t have the words to describe it, you were the one he always turned to. When his hair was long and he felt uncomfortable with how his mom had braided it, he’d always come to you asking you to undo it. You’d tie it up and tuck it all under a baseball cap for him. When he was upset because his parents picked out dresses for him to wear on picture days, you’d come to school with an extra set of clothes for him to change into afterwards. When someone would call him by his full birth name as a child, you’d notice him recoil when no one else would, and against your shy nature you’d speak,
“They prefer Andy.” If your timid voice was lost in the wind, you’d repeat it like a record until everyone heard.
These were small acts in the grand scheme of things, but your consistent willingness to make him as confident and happy as he could possibly be without ever stopping to interrogate him forged an ineffable bond between you two. One that seems to have endured even after all those years of estrangement.
Remembering all this, you feel a surge of assurance and step into the embrace of his arms with a soft smile. He immediately clasps his arms around you in a hug, engulfing you with warmth. You yelp as he pulls you to the floor with him so you’re nested in his lap. Against yourself, you flush as the firm planes of his toned body press against yours. You hadn’t been this close to him since you were kids - when you’d wrestle and learn to do cartwheels together and fall asleep against each other watching movies. It was different then, you’re grown up now. You’d just kissed. If you close your eyes, you could still feel him on your lips.
Your blush intensifies as Andy rests his hand atop your head and nestles you in the crook of his neck. You worry that he’ll feel how hot your face has grown. His skin is smooth and soft against yours. You’re so overwhelmed by how safe and comfortable you are that it makes you sleepy.
“You feel so good in my arms,” Andy murmurs against your hair, “you’re so warm.” You let out a contented hum. The tranquility around you both is astonishingly comfortable; neither of you feel pressured to fill the silence. 
Andy shifts a little, careful not to disturb you and leans closer. His gaze rakes over you adoringly, almost like he can’t believe you’re there with him. Your eyes widen a little as he swoops down to nuzzle his face against your neck.
“Are we there yet?” He asks suddenly, you give him a puzzled look.
“There?”
“Like….. Can I kiss you?” This time, you’re the one who laughs.
“Why wouldn’t you? We just did ten minutes ago.”
“I mean….” His face turns bashful, “Can I kiss you everywhere? Like…. Your neck and stuff?”
“Oh!” You can’t help the trace of eagerness in your voice, “Yeah. I’d really like that.” Andy breaks into a relieved smile,
“Awesome.”
Keeping his arm wrapped around your shoulders and using his freehand to cup your face, he brushes his lips against your forehead first. He presses a kiss to your temple next, then your cheek. Your eyes flutter shut and he sweeps two kisses over your lashes. He blazes a trail down your face, over your jaw, down your neck, and to your shoulders, stopping mid way to nip at your ear. A shuddery sigh slips from you involuntarily, and you almost melt from embarrassment,
“Crap, sorry!” You say burying your face in your hands. Andy laughs,
“You’re so fricken cute.” This makes you blush even harder, “You don’t have to say sorry for feeling good - just means I’m doing a good job.” Andy gives you a cheeky grin, you smirk in response and a surge of confidence overtakes you. It occurs to you then, gazing at his dazzling smile, how much you want to spoil him in return. All the years spent apart when he was tormented by others at school and you were too traumatized from Jane’s death to reach out to him again. You want to devour him, give him everything he deserves and more - to make up for lost time.
“Humph, well mind if I return the favor?” You say. Impossibly, Andy’s eyes light up even brighter.
“That’d be awesome. Just…” he rubs his nape shyly, “keep it above the collar.”
“Of course.” You reach up to run your fingers through his damp hair before trailing them down the sharp lines of his jaw, savoring the sight of him. He nuzzles into your hand and you take advantage of the new angle and place an open mouthed kiss to his pulse point. You playfully nibble his ear lobe next, where his piercing is, making him giggle. Your kisses are slower than his, deliberate and lingering. You shift so you’re straddling him and continue trailing down his neck. His hand goes to the small of your back, pressing you evermore closer.
“Mmmmm,” he moans, leaning into your touch. You take a moment then, to pull back and press your forehead against his. His dark brown eyes are glassy in an adorable, dopey, star struck way. Your heart stutters at the acknowledgement that that look’s for you.
“The mighty King Kang on his knees for a dorky, art nerd,” You tease, “little tiny childhood Angel is freaking out right now.” 
“Imagine how little tiny Andy feels.” Andy says back, you chuckle.
“Probably weirded out. I don’t think anyone like you would’ve imagined they’d end up with someone like me.” Andy cocks an eyebrow at you, perplexed.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” 
“We didn’t  really make sense on paper back then. I was always a people pleasing doormat as a kid and you…. Were everything but that.” The look Andy gives you is confused and incredulous.
“Ang, I’ve liked liked you ever since we were little kids.” He says. The breath leaves you all at once; something in your chest clenches. The shock must show on your face because Andy continues,
“You didn’t notice? Everyone else said it was pretty obvious.” You take a moment to reflect on this; Scenes from your childhood together rewind in your mind’s eye in a new light. You recall suddenly, that whenever you got picked on by other kids, Andy would come rushing to your side before anyone else, before Jane even. It wasn’t just when you were getting harassed either, it was whenever you were scared at all. When your friends wanted to watch scary movies, when you were too afraid to ask the adults for something, when you had nightmares during your sleepovers. You remember the warmth of his hand curling around yours, how he’d tuck you protectively behind him even though he was shorter at the time.
You just assumed he was like that with everyone - that it was just in his nature to be brave when he saw someone cowardly like you.
But you see it in his vulnerable expression, it’s true. You were Andy Kang’s first love.
“But if everyone else knew …. Why didn’t you say anything to me?” You say once you find your voice again.
“Well, I didn’t know it was a crush until years later… and we were all split up by then,” his expression grows more guarded, “It was also… after I realized ….  And I just… I just thought - no one would want me like that, after….” His voice breaks a little as he trails off. Your heart cracks at the noise.
There’s so much to be said. You want to tell him how hilariously absurd and ironic this all is. Because you loved him before you even completely understood what that meant. You knew that he was different from the moment you met him, and you never gave a damn. You fell for him because he was daring and bold and kind. That didn’t change once he transitioned. But all you manage is,
“Oh…” everything else catches in your throat, “Oh, Andy…” You wrap your arms around his shoulders and tuck your face into the crook of his neck. He hugs you back fiercely, releasing a shaky breath against your nape. You try to communicate everything you want to say through the embrace alone; you want it all to penetrate his bones and pierce through his soul so that he’d know as long as you exist someone will always want him as he is.
“Bet when I said ‘I’d been wanting to do that for a while’ you didn’t expect this huh?” Despite Andy’s effort to break the tension, you hear the uncertainty in his voice. It makes you think back to what he said after he kissed you for the first time.
I guess I just like you a lot and I was scared you wouldn’t feel the same.
Andy Kang. The boy who wasn’t afraid of anything - Not of scraping his knees to conquer the tallest climbing tree he could find, not of coming out to a conservative town in the middle of Oregon, not of fighting monsters in the woods to save his friends. The bravest person you’d ever met, Andy Kang, feared losing you.
“Andy,” you pull back and cradle his face in your hands, “the years apart are over now. I’ve wanted you for so long…. If you’ll have me, then I’m yours - and no one can take me away from you.” You fluster as the words leave your mouth - somehow that all sounded less nauseatingly cheesy in your head. You expect him to laugh at you - to poke fun of how you could say something so tender to someone you’d reconnected with for less than a month. But he just gazes at you with the most reverent look in his eyes.
“No one can take you away from me.”
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pansexy-choices-the-sequal · 2 months ago
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I need a break from painting abs. I just can’t get it right so far DX
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pansexy-choices-the-sequal · 2 months ago
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Around 2 years ago I was r*ped by a trans woman and (stupidly) decided to remain in a relationship with her. I gave up all my time and hobbies in favor of working one to three jobs at a time, coking, cleaning, and going to school full time. In addition, she also spoke negatively about anything masculine despite me identifying as trans masc at the time which made me really hate myself.
It’s been around two years, After all that I’ve started oil painting for the first time since. And I feel like there’s some poetic justice in the fact that the first thing I’m painting is a trans man.
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