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INSTANT REBLOG HANDS HURT ME

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[peacock-of-passione]

I reposted this on the right account now yay

when they get jealous

featuring !! every twst boy except for ortho

MALLEUS DRACONIA

evil bastard

listens to nicki minaj on his nokia 3000 (bought his absolute brick of a phone from sam’s 1 Thaumark Sale so nicki is Very Staticky) as he sits cross legged on his chair, plotting revenge on the plebeians who have been unfairly Hogging your attention for the past week

ever since you joined his Gargoyle Study Club, an influx of nrc students started mass applying to join in your stead

was ecstatic at first. made everyone Homemade Gargoyle Shirts that say I ❤️ GARGOYLES on the front until he quickly realized his beloved gargoyle study club had morphed into the Y/N Dating Club  

first off. no one knows you’re dating. sebek banned the two of you from ever going public with your relationship because it “tainted the reputation of our lord and savior malleus” and also “stripped him of his lovely (spiritual) fertile maiden’s bosom”.

???????

fertile???? maidens????? bosom?????

Basically No One Knows Your Dating. which means you are free real estate and the population of nrc want to move in!

malleus gets jealous incredibly easy because he thinks (THINKS) he is a Certified Expert With a Masters Degree on the topic of knowing when people are into you. (He is Not)

he Fell in love with you so everyone else has to be Stupid to also not fall in love with you

like why are you breathing so cutely? why are you walking so prettily? why are you speaking so breathtakingly??? is enraged if anyone disagrees with him but is also enraged if anyone agrees with him.

basically :

“yeah, i have a crush on y/n”

malleus: ٩(╬ʘ益ʘ╬)۶

“no, what? i don’t have a crush on them…”

malleus, breathing heavily: ٩(╬ʘ益ʘ╬)۶

tends to get clingy when you’re talking with someone else

oh? you’re talking with another guy? he’s wrapping his arm around your waist. oh? you’re working with another guy on a school project? he’s intertwining your hands together.

ends up getting so jealous with everyone in his Gargoyle Study Club that he comes up with a Genius Idea (it’s not genius) (it’s horrendous) (and a little insulting)

bans everyone in the club from attending or joining Any Club That Is Hosted By Malleus Draconia for. personal reasons.

blocks sebek on his nokia and sends out a formally penned letter to everyone in NRC that he is dating you.

you’re ??????? at why the Gargoyle Study Club has suddenly dropped from 27 members to 2 members in the span of a day. and why you got a whole thesis paper on malleus’s dating life.

malleus starts walking you to classes everyday and is the Perfect Charming Boyfriend to everyone around him

meanwhile. sebek purchases a flamethrower

Keep reading

[peacock-of-passione]

Slay ladybug man

[peacock-of-passione]

23 Kids and Counting P1-Heartslabyul

————————————

Based off @twst-trash’s twst kid posts, check their stuff out! It won’t make sense unless you do lol

GN! Reader!

Crackfic honestly

I have a bunch of headcannons on the twst boys kids and stuff but for this im not gonna mention their appearance or anything at all that could be identifying. but im definitely gonna post more about the twst kids and stuff

If this sucks please tell me

Almost all of the kids are like 8 or in that age range

——————

Heartslabyul-

•ok so first all

•poor y/n

•next-

•Riddles so red and shaky at the thought y’all had a kid together you’re 99% sure he’s gonna implode

•He’s also chugging down tea like it’s red wine and he’s a middle aged southern woman going through a nasty breakup

•y’all’s kid is just sitting there next to him simultaneously preparing themselves to catch his cherry ass when he eventually feints and judging the other kids and their parents

•like wow y/nski you really just giving me up for those fuckers in those other timelines? I mean I get giving up dad but I’m fucking aweso-

•riddle child u are mentally starting fights ur 3’4 ass can’t back up

•meanwhile Trey trying to teaching his crotchspawn how to bake

•they end of making 3 batches of cupcakes (trey’s kid poured soy sauce on 1/3 of them and is waiting to see which people pick up the lucky cupcakes)

•Trey knows

•Trey supports his child in this endeavor

•Trey is secretly more evil than all the other characters combined

•Trey gives u an unpoisioned one and makes a comment about you could have these sweets every day if y’all were together

•Cater and his child are on the couch shit talking gossiping about everyone else.

•common ginger behavior

•Also they’re taking like 9000 selfies while doing so

•cater child braids their fathers hair

•cater posts all the photos on his Magicam and literally brings the site down

•Even more Flirty w/ you know that he knows he has a chance

•Now onto the egg boi and his progeny

•they are so

•so

•so

•so

•stupid

•y/nnie please help them they’re dumb dumbs

•Not half a brain cell between them

•the good news is that deuces child isn’t evil hellspawn like the rest

•they’re just drawing pictures with their dad on the floor

•honestly out of all of heartslabyul ur considering him for top baby daddy

•he’s honestly really good with them

•when he isn’t having a mental breakdown on the idea of y’all being together and having a kid

•Now y’all may have been wondering why I haven’t mentioned Acey-wacey and his child

•Well they had to keep his in a separate room

•THE THING IS FERAL

•Crowley has to go get a rabies test since ur wild child practically chomped a piece of his arm off

•(u let it have a piece of raw steak for that)

•Crewel let you have one of his kennels for it

•it’s ok it’s big and furnished

•Ace is out here saying that you have some favoritism and why can’t his child be let into the common room

•you say they can as long as he puts it on a leash and watches the thing himself

•he promptly shuts up

•still tries to be flirty and suave about y’all getting together but then he gets cut off when you both realize ur thing has chewed through the bars of the kennel and is causing chaos in the dorm

(Crewel sends you a bill 2 days later for the kennel)

—————-

Anyway sorry if this is bad it’s my first post 😅.

[peacock-of-passione]

I want to eat this comic

Burikko kyoudai (≖_≖ )

[peacock-of-passione]

Fr thought they meant Kellogg as in fallout 4 Kellogg

Kellogg’s is making a Twitch channel for Tony the Tiger as a vtuber. It is the moral duty of everyone who can spare the time to do so to spam the most vile, repulsive, unabashedly horny nonsense in the chat, such that this cannot be maintained. Hold the line against the continual corporate takeover of our media. Become unprofitable.

[peacock-of-passione]

23 Kids and Counting P1-Heartslabyul

————————————

Based off @twst-trash’s twst kid posts, check their stuff out! It won’t make sense unless you do lol

GN! Reader!

Crackfic honestly

I have a bunch of headcannons on the twst boys kids and stuff but for this im not gonna mention their appearance or anything at all that could be identifying. but im definitely gonna post more about the twst kids and stuff

If this sucks please tell me

Almost all of the kids are like 8 or in that age range

——————

Heartslabyul-

•ok so first all

•poor y/n

•next-

•Riddles so red and shaky at the thought y’all had a kid together you’re 99% sure he’s gonna implode

•He’s also chugging down tea like it’s red wine and he’s a middle aged southern woman going through a nasty breakup

•y’all’s kid is just sitting there next to him simultaneously preparing themselves to catch his cherry ass when he eventually feints and judging the other kids and their parents

•like wow y/nski you really just giving me up for those fuckers in those other timelines? I mean I get giving up dad but I’m fucking aweso-

•riddle child u are mentally starting fights ur 3’4 ass can’t back up

•meanwhile Trey trying to teaching his crotchspawn how to bake

•they end of making 3 batches of cupcakes (trey’s kid poured soy sauce on 1/3 of them and is waiting to see which people pick up the lucky cupcakes)

•Trey knows

•Trey supports his child in this endeavor

•Trey is secretly more evil than all the other characters combined

•Trey gives u an unpoisioned one and makes a comment about you could have these sweets every day if y’all were together

•Cater and his child are on the couch shit talking gossiping about everyone else.

•common ginger behavior

•Also they’re taking like 9000 selfies while doing so

•cater child braids their fathers hair

•cater posts all the photos on his Magicam and literally brings the site down

•Even more Flirty w/ you know that he knows he has a chance

•Now onto the egg boi and his progeny

•they are so

•so

•so

•so

•stupid

•y/nnie please help them they’re dumb dumbs

•Not half a brain cell between them

•the good news is that deuces child isn’t evil hellspawn like the rest

•they’re just drawing pictures with their dad on the floor

•honestly out of all of heartslabyul ur considering him for top baby daddy

•he’s honestly really good with them

•when he isn’t having a mental breakdown on the idea of y’all being together and having a kid

•Now y’all may have been wondering why I haven’t mentioned Acey-wacey and his child

•Well they had to keep his in a separate room

•THE THING IS FERAL

•Crowley has to go get a rabies test since ur wild child practically chomped a piece of his arm off

•(u let it have a piece of raw steak for that)

•Crewel let you have one of his kennels for it

•it’s ok it’s big and furnished

•Ace is out here saying that you have some favoritism and why can’t his child be let into the common room

•you say they can as long as he puts it on a leash and watches the thing himself

•he promptly shuts up

•still tries to be flirty and suave about y’all getting together but then he gets cut off when you both realize ur thing has chewed through the bars of the kennel and is causing chaos in the dorm

(Crewel sends you a bill 2 days later for the kennel)

—————-

Anyway sorry if this is bad it’s my first post 😅.