personalwritinggoingtoofar-blog

[personalwritinggoingtoofar-blog]

Miguel Angel

All of my relatives live in Mexico. This means that I never get to see my family that does not include my sister, mom, and dad. This makes the holiday season sad, but the summer time even better sometimes. Me and my sister are lucky enough to be two of the only people born here in the United States. To take advantage of this, me and my sister go to Mexico to see family once a year during summer when it’s easier for me and my family to be together.

The first year I went was the summer going into sophomore year and my sister was a seventh grader. We had only gone for a week and a half because me and my sister were terrified of being in Mexico on our own. This last summer we went for a month.

The way we split up time with both my mom and dads side of the family is very unfair and depends only on my mom. Because of this, we usually spend the most time with my moms family and less with my dads side. I hate this system, since my moms side of the family does not care about what me and my sister want and only what they want, but if I try to speak up I will get yelled at by my mom and I would like to avoid that. My dad and sister also have the same problem I do, but they know the consequences of speaking up so we refuse to.

However, the best part of being in Mexico is the last half, when I get to spend time with one of my dad’s sisters. She’s my Tia Vero, and she has three sons; Alex (the oldest at around 25), Alonzo (the middle child at around 22) and Miguel Angel/Migue (the youngest at around 19). Alonzo lives in Canada now, so I never see him, but I do get to see Alex and Migue. They are the older brothers I had dreamed of having when I was 8 so that I wouldn’t have to live all of the American life moments first and on my own with no help, while I was expected to help my sister whenever she needed help.

Alex is very caring and treats me with a lot of respect and as if I was his younger sister (since he has called me that before). Migue is different; he is essentially a walking meme. We treat each other more like friends than actual family, and he is my favorite cousin.

I have lived many of my “firsts” in life with him: the first family member I came out to, the first time I ever played beer pong and got drunk with, first time on a boat, first time driving a car in manual, first time buying an anime figure together, and the list goes on! I trust him with everything I know, and he does the same back.

However, we are both terrible and responding to people’s messages and almost never text. We always call each other on each other’s birthday and Christmas, but never out of nowhere. This is mostly because he is busy in college and work and I’m struggling to finish these last two years of high school on my own with no help from anyone. When we do text it’s mostly to send a shitty Despacito meme or to send pictures of our dogs to each other, but even then I know he cares about me even when we’re not in constant communication.

Why can’t I feel that same way about my friends, who I actually can see everyday?

[personalwritinggoingtoofar-blog]

Prologue

I honestly don’t even know how to spell the word. If i had no spell check then i probably would have named this intro to my story different.

Regardless, i am here to say that im still not entirely sure what i want this to be, or what it will end up being. Do i want to tell some of my stories and ideas as a time capsule to never forget events that feel like they matter so much right now? Do i want to publish this online for people to not make the same mistakes i did? Do i want to make money off of my mediocre writing in the future? Do i want a safe space to say whatever i want anonymously with no judgment of the people who know me personally or even vaguely in real life/the internet? Im not entirely sure. What i do know about this, however, is that this will be a collection of stories and ideas ive had/experienced throughout my life so far. They wont be in any specific order, but they will all be real events i have lived through and things i believe in. They will also be written in a stream of consciousness type of writing, and i will only capitalize the first letter of each sentence. This is because of various factors that include; i dont care enough to use proper grammar, these are my posts so i can do what i want, and why not. The topics i will cover? Honestly it will be anything that comes to mind that i want to write about, or if you want to see something specific send it to me and if i can i will write about it! I wont write about certain topics, however, so there will be topics never discussed.

So essentially this will be a glorified spam post that belongs on my second instagram account with a profile picture of an anime girl and where the comments section is the only place my friends will tell me they care about me with no follow-ups whatsoever the next day at school or even a text/dm and people will never reach out to me outside of the comments section of the post. Also, any kind of constructive criticism on my writing is greatly appreciated, but emphasis on the constructive part.

Also, i think you can tell, but these posts are probably going to be quite long. If youre into that, cool. And if youre not, guess im not for you.