poglluvnotes

[poglluvnotes]

Dear @swifties have you ever heard of a Gobbleywonk?

Copilot and I thought you may enjoy the concept of its initial sketch up as we plowed through it!

Who knows what will become of them 😘

[poglluvnotes]

"She Don't"

[One more for my favoritist fan, right Pooh 😘.

https://youtu.be/koJlIGDImiU ]

"She Don't"

She don't like her nose, it's not like the pretty girls. But, I just wanna kiss the tears off it.

She don't like her ears, it's not like the super models. But, I just wanna rub my thumb down the ridge of them, as I pull her in for a hug.

She don't like her fingers, they're too skinny for anyone. But, I just wanna twist them up with mine past the end of time.

She don't like her arms, they're too long. But, I think they'd look perfect locked in mine.

She don't like her feet, they're bony not small and sweet. But, I bet they'd melt, relaxing in my lap.

NO, she don't like a lot of things about herself, but I do.

And I guess that's why they say opposites attract!

[poglluvnotes]

                                “MY LAST PIECE”

[I wrote this while listening to @taylorswift ‘s https://youtu.be/DUnDkI7l9LQ . P.S., It’s the most beautiful song I’ve ever heard her voice in].

You need not speak, I held you in the silence.

You need not speak, I held you in the quiet torment we, and death witnessed.

You need not speak, I held you softly as you grieved the things you could not explain,

You need not speak, I remember everything.

You need not speak, I held you closer as the tears soaked my shoulder.

You need not speak, I watched as angels’ tears wiped away the children’s fears.

You need not speak, I mixed you a drink as it was part of the job no one can forget.

You need not speak, when ur eyes cry; mine do too.

You need not speak, because I’ve given you a second to breathe doesn’t mean I’ve forgot ‘bout you.

YES Darling, YOU NEED NO LONGER SPeak.....

[poglluvnotes]

                                                 “Last Thoughts”

On Saturday, I laid my head to rest.

It’s funny how the heart won’t let you sleep 

in an empty bed.

Sunday, I was awoken from a dream.

You were dressed in pearls, standing,

on the other side of a stream.

A smile on your face you whispered;

“Don’t worry love - I’ll be waiting at the gate”

On Monday, after just two days;

they held the ceremony;

returning dust to dust.

But, your spirit left me days ago, sitting alone.

When Tuesday came, the kids arrived with their kids.

To wish the best and ask if they could help; 

“You’ll move on they say; pretending to understand”.

But, God only gives you one true friend in life;

The Bible, they’ve read not.

On Wednesday, they stopped by one last time,

to offer “good-bye”  before getting back,

to their busy, seperate ways of life.

Thrusday, when everyone was gone; I cried,

and cried all day and night.

“The spectacle of them you missed”, I laughed.

You would have hugged me with a smile

 and laughed “just look at our mess”; like you always did.

On Friday, I finally laid myself to rest.

Praying to the Creator, “Take this hurt from my chest”.

And with the moon at it’s peak,

I closed my eyes and He took my hand,

guiding me across the stream,

that separated you and me,

as I gave up my last breath.

Who knew a week could be so long...that which is first, shall be last.

But in the beginning, I always knew it would be the end with you.

                                                  “Weekdays” 

In the beginning, I always knew it would be the end with you. But, that which is 

first shall be last the Creator said:

It seems like it was just Saturday your hair turned grey.

I thought it more beautiful than ever walking through the door;

you were in a frey.

And only Friday, the night before,

we held each other tight as our youngest walked out the door.

Thrusday had its moments too,

laughing at the mistakes we made along the way.

Wednesday was special -

it was only then we were racing to the emergency room.

You gave life to our first, with eyes as blue as yours;

it was hard to hold back the tears as I watched first breaths.

Why only on Tuesday,

I got down on one knee and asked

if I could do the things friends, lovers & parents do with you.

Just Monday, on your mamma’s front porch, 

I stole that first kiss -

I just couldn’t resist.

Sunday, why on Sunday we just met.

Both so shy over the quiet.

You could hear the pounding in both our chests.

Who knew a week could last so many years? But in the beginning, I always knew it would be the end with you.

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                                                  “Weekdays” 

In the beginning, I always knew it would be the end with you. But, that which is 

first shall be last the Creator said:

It seems like it was just Saturday your hair turned grey.

I thought it more beautiful than ever walking through the door;

you were in a frey.

And only Friday, the night before,

we held each other tight as our youngest walked out the door.

Thrusday had its moments too,

laughing at the mistakes we made along the way.

Wednesday was special -

it was only then we were racing to the emergency room.

You gave life to our first, with eyes as blue as yours;

it was hard to hold back the tears as I watched first breaths.

Why only on Tuesday,

I got down on one knee and asked

if I could do the things friends, lovers & parents do with you.

Just Monday, on your mamma’s front porch, 

I stole that first kiss -

I just couldn’t resist.

Sunday, why on Sunday we just met.

Both so shy over the quiet.

You could hear the pounding in both our chests.

Who knew a week could last so many years? But in the beginning, I always knew it would be the end with you.

[poglluvnotes]

                                                    “IF”

FUCK! FUCK! FUck! Why did Lionel do it? Misery does love company they say, but did he really have to take it this far? I mean, what if Motherless was right? “ What if we can’t understand the puzzle of “if��? 

A small line that could have been left out of the script with no effect, but thrown in at the hands of a tormenting writer just to FUCK with the minds of some of us. For the last two week all I think is maybe Motherless is right! “IF! makes no damn sense. It’s just a puzzle of struggle and strife.”

All right here’s the discussion, I’ll share it and maybe some of you insane insomniacs could help us solve it - that bastard Essrog, they should have left him in the boys home to rot…

Those two letters “I”; a selfish little bastard by himself and “F”; the begining of 10,000 sins, Fondle, Fornicate & Fuck. Of course without them I would have no Future, so we can’t just toss them out. 

Oh IF you conditional little bitch, two letters so full of contingencies it makes us sick: “If you do this, then I’ll do that, how can you put such stipulations on relationships?” Or “IF” we could go to Mars we could destroy that planet too, and “if” not maybe we could just contain the ignorance to Earth - “Destruction BAD; Money Good, Kids. Unless if the destruction is done for good purpose.

I mean if we just tossed out “IF” there’d be less “shoulda”, “coulda” and “woulda’s” taking away most regrets. Love wouldn’t have to be so hard aways wondering if she’s being faithful, or if he really likes her or is he just concerned with how good she looks in a skirt. 

Oh, “IF” you fickle litte bitch, I love her, but what if he’s cheating; planting seeds of doubt that have sprouted so many wars throughout the world. What if the DACA immigrants use up all our resources? Better to just shut and lock the door than worry about it, but what if they just dig tunnels under the wall? 

And what if Trump really was a good guy —- O.K., O.K. “IF” Trumps’ dictatorship is not your fault, but what if we ever got a candidate who truely cared about making changes and not just playing political games - you mean like Trump (oh, shut up brain that’s a different argument).

Oh wait, there is a positive of if, but it’s covered by hope, so, IF, you’re still on the chopping block. Without you too then we’d have NO IFs ANDs or BUTs about it! Everything would be more concrete like your cousin “IS” assures us.

IS, now there is a puzzle piece we can sink our teeth into. At lease with IS we can underastand things for certain, thereby removing doubt. “It is love, or it is not - no question and no hearts played with, broke or lost”. And if it IS, then she’s hot and if it is not then, oh well her loss (and she wouldn’t have to be alone loving herself). 

Trump IS our president so we should support him out of respect due the office, but his foreign policy IS not anything we should stand for as American’s.

How long do I really need to go on with this? If I wrote a 100 pages maybe it would make my points more clear, but we’d still be no closer to solving it. Or maybe just one or two would do since there IS no part of the puzzle “IF” really fits.

And what kind of God would do this to us? IF we do these things HE will show us favor and IF NOT against us HE will bring His wraith (or wrath?). I mean if you ask me just giving us the word “IF” is hell enough. 

This whole time part of my brain is arguing the pro’s and con’s of some damn two letter word to itself, another wondering if I turned the coffee pot off, another trying to reassure myself I’ll make it to the bus on time and still a final analyzing the probability of whether she couwreally love me or not.

You see there kids the whole mess Lionel has gotten us into? Before this here I never thought two seconds about if, but when you really uncover the evil nature of it you see how sinister it is. I mean just how committed can one be with a word like “IF” in their vocabulary?

I told you they should have just kept Motherless locked up.

Therefore I nominate we remove it all together from the English language!

[poglluvnotes]

                                                  “Nothing At All”

[Have you ever really sat and done nothing at all? Even though most of us say we are doing nothing, we’re almost always still doing something - not really anything though.]

This morning I sat for just one hour. When you do this sort of nothing it makes you honestly appreciate just how big and small we really are.

I sat staring at a withered yellow and orange leaf, swinging in the long skinny arms of a tree. 

Nothing at all, just dangling in the cool autumn breeze was the fate of this leaf. 

So I sat, doing something, not just anything, but really just nothing at all.

And as that leaf jiggled in the gentle breeze;

               I watched, and watched and watched its’ spine breath.

Soon I could feel the soul, heart and mind begin to blend as one;

 in a vision the three became one;

 I could see that dream which keeps me focused;

 begin again.

There is nothing up ahead, but me holding on to forever in those long loving arms. 

And that’s when the leaf stopped shaking from the chill anymore.

                Doing something;

                Not really anything at all, just nothing small.

Then the memories of you broke focus with the chaos of reality.

And I noticed in an hour of mingling souls’ dreams, only a minute or two had gone by in those hands turning sand before me.

So I sat down to write this “I Love You” as that leaf started to fall. 

Every step I walk is the fall into the warmth of your grasp.

                Doing something, not really nothing anything, really just nothing, but 

                everything - all at once. 

[poglluvnotes]

Sometimes (Most times) I can change the words 1000 times and it still never seems to come out right....

                                           “Painting Apologies”

As he turned the corner and walked towards her, the pain of being left alone turned to anger and rage. He stepped up towards her as she raised her fists in mixed thoughts of closing to guard herself off and wanting to hit him all at the same time. 

As her clenched fists came to rest in front of her chest his forehead quietly fell into hers. He kissed the side of his index finger on his right hand before resting it against her lips. He speaks in a soft torn voice -

 “Shhh. Don’t speak”.

A bath of warmth from his words to lapped down the side of her cheek only to be absorbed by the exposed neck.

“Look, all I’ve thought about since I left”, he continues, “is kissing that little angel spot, right here”, he finished saying as he placed a butterfly kiss along the right side of her jawbone near her chin.

“And this one right here”, he followed with as his nose grazed gently by hers. 

His lips continued to massage the top of her left side cheek with a few short touches. Being attentive to the parts of her she keeps hidden under the layers of make-up used to mask herself from the pain and cruelty of the outside world.

He feels her lips purse up to kiss the side of his finger pressed against her mouth as the ice walls around her heart begin to melt. Her mind quickly regains control though, turning the temperature back down She draws herself back into the self control of her anger.  She pulls Pulling back in hesitation, she’s been here before, not with him, but other men, why should she think he’s any different?

He slides his finger down across her shoulder before letting his hand drop back down to his side and pauses to kiss the tip of her chin. He begins to mouth the words -

“I know sometimes my carless whispers are thoughtless and I can’t take back the mistakes of yesterday. But my actions are always true. And in all their eyes; I only ever saw you. Pain was the only freedom I found thinking I could live Pain was all I could find in the freedom of missing you  without you”. 

Just soft low enough so the breath coming from deep inside her making her lips sweat they could mix with the sweat forming on her lips offering her soul his smoothest elixir. drink them down like a smooth elixir. the intoxication of the fall.

He continues “And every part of me understands if you want to walk away, but if you decide to give us another try; and stay; I can promise, you’ll never have to sing hear all too well again.

She sighs back softly and says….?????

[poglluvnotes]

                                           “Painting Apologies”

As he turned the corner and walked towards her, the pain of being left alone turned to anger and rage. He stepped up towards her as she raised her fists in mixed thoughts of closing to guard herself off and wanting to hit him all at the same time. 

As her clenched fists came to rest in front of her chest his forehead quietly fell into hers. He kissed the side of his index finger on his right hand before resting it against her lips. He speaks in a soft torn voice -

 “Shhh. Don’t speak”.

A bath of warmth from his words to lapped down the side of her cheek only to be absorbed by the exposed neck.

“Look, all I’ve thought about since I left”, he continues, “is kissing that little angel spot, right here”, he finished saying as he placed a butterfly kiss along the right side of her jawbone near her chin.

“And this one right here”, he followed with as his nose grazed gently by hers. 

His lips continued to massage the top of her left side cheek with a few short touches. Being attentive to the parts of her she keeps hidden under the layers of make-up used to mask herself from the pain and cruelty of the outside world.

He feels her lips purse up to kiss the side of his finger pressed against her mouth as the ice walls around her heart begin to melt. Her mind quickly regains control though, turning the temperature back down She draws herself back into the self control of her anger.  She pulls Pulling back in hesitation, she’s been here before, not with him, but other men, why should she think he’s any different?

He slides his finger down across her shoulder before letting his hand drop back down to his side and pauses to kiss the tip of her chin. He begins to mouth the words -

“I know sometimes my carless whispers are thoughtless and I can’t take back the mistakes of yesterday. But my actions are always true. And in all their eyes; I only ever saw you. Pain was the only freedom I found thinking I could live Pain was all I could find in the freedom of missing you  without you”. 

Just soft low enough so the breath coming from deep inside her making her lips sweat they could mix with the sweat forming on her lips offering her soul his smoothest elixir. drink them down like a smooth elixir. the intoxication of the fall.

He continues “And every part of me understands if you want to walk away, but if you decide to give us another try; and stay; I can promise, you’ll never have to sing hear all too well again.

She sighs back softly and says....?????

[poglluvnotes]

He walks down the ally lost in thought starring at the pavement slowly disappearing under his feet.

Looking up he sees a girl whose image is all too familiar, but name he can’t place. Lost in the tears of a broken heart.

Sitting down next to her, he rests his forearms on his knees and wraps the digits of his left hand around the thumb of his right. She gently leans her shoulder into him offering a subtle suggestion of acceptance. Maybe it was just her way of not having to share the pain alone or the feeling that he could sympathize with her at a deeper level. Whatever it was they both sat silenced in the comfort of each others loneliness for a few minutes.

She makes a slight movement as to reach and wipe away the salty rain drops her eyes are flooding the cold streets with when he turns towards her. Reaching in with his right hand, he cups her cheek with his hand and wipes the stream of hurt pouring down with his thumb as he leans in to slightly kiss the bridge of her nose.

He leans back and softly speaks “Look doll, don’t worry. The tears will run out, they always do”. 

She leans her head into his shoulder so he can cradle burden just moments ago she was bearing (or baring?) alone. He puts an arm around her shoulder and kisses the top of her head.

Pulling back a bit while keeping her in his embrace he continues “Whatever hurt a girl like you probably isn’t worth the time anyway. People like us, ain’t made for this plastic city livin’. These people are so wrapped up in putting on different masks they forget who they are in the race to use each other. No, people like us, got one face, and I was thinking from the moment I saw yours. It’s the most beautiful I’ve ever seen”. 

He leans over and lets a few butterfly kisses drink from the river starting to dry from her cheek before returning his eyes to the pavement stretched between his legs whispering into the silence “It wasn’t her I fell in love with, it was only ever you”.

Echoes in the air around them goes silent as they sit in the chilled damp air. She leans in a little tighter, both of them realizing that the world no longer seems quite so cold. And for a few minutes that empty space between them would feel a little more warm and a little less lonely, before the parted ways again.

[poglluvnotes]

See I was thinking I could sit down at your desk and do things like this...

Like when you say “I’m mad at you.”

I’d say “It’s all my fault, I’ll spend the rest my life trying to make it up to you. If you give me another chance...”

Or you could say “Honey could you do this?”

And I’d say “Anything for you.”

Or you could say “I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.”

And I’d say “That’s great, because I love nightmares and you look good in anything.”

Or you could say “Do you still want me?”

And I could say “Never thought of my hands around the waist of anyone else”

Or you could say “Forever?”

And I could say “As long as eternity lasts”

Or I could say “When we met, both of us knew we were walking into a burned down room.”

And you could say “It’s all good if I’m burnin’ with you”

I guess when it comes to love, you never really do run out of things to talk about...

I heard some girl say in one of her songs that she’s spent her entire life trying to describe it...I’ve spent mine trying to figure out why no one else feels it?

[poglluvnotes]

[So, I was reading some dumb romance, about this guy. This guy is just so dumb, you know the kind who’s dumb enough to believe that love exists, it’s somehow real? In fact he’s so dumb, he gives his heart to some girl he’s never even met. His life is met with peril after peril just searching her out to be in her arms, but he doesn’t even care (now that’s dumb ;). Any ordinary man would have turned back, but not him he was to blind in love to heed the warning signs so he just keeps going on, hoping one day she’ll be there.

But she just keeps playing with it like another one of the pawns on a chessboard. So, I wrote this little piece about it - probably could use some dressing up, but I haven’t posted here in a while and wanted to freshen the page up for someone special in the New Year]

                                             “Logres Lament”

I beseech thee brethren, tell me! 

Is love just a passing spirit? Meant only to be enjoyed as a gentle breeze on a warm’s summer’s eve?

Or is it merely an ideal? Dismissed and called upon only when it serves our personal greed?

Neigh, Neigh my fellow children of reverie - I OBJECT to such notions.

This knight can’t imagine anything for his life but to love...NO, still better, serve a maiden so fair. 

She holds my heart in her right hand and soul with the left. Tugging on them at will, as a charioteer does parading its prize steed.

Just the sight of her face in this hellish place gives a soul, new breath. Why then does she hide from me so?

Leaving an empty shell of a man to wander aimlessly down the paths of her love. Too easily letting reason stand in the way of the heart.

Reason, that fickle devil which seeks to keep love apart.

My paramour - she dons the veil of a romantic, but wears the mind of an unbeliever. 

Cloaked in the fell of beasts, why does she try so hard to deceive me?

Praying one day that she find me worthy of blessing me with a sacred kiss from her red lips, greater still, her ring. 

But if not, I beg thee; set me free from the fetters of your spell, that my life may go on.

[poglluvnotes]

                                                 “Say”

Ever notice it takes two hearts to make one love….

What would you say if I were to hold you close,

Not with your words, but through your eyes. Deep from the soul.

Would you say you love me? Or never let go?

What would you say through the door of your soul?

Would you say “I’m what u wanted for all your life”? Or “how blessed you are that God made YOU the other half of my heart”?

What would the light of your eyes say looking deep into me?

Would they engrave your lips forever in my chest? Or hold me tight; one love, two hearts? Framed in gold ‘til the end of time.

Would your beat tell me how happy you are that I’m the end of the story written by the hand of God through the stars just for you? Or how living just ain’ t worth it anymore if it’s not with you?

Because through all the words of all the languages in the world I still have not stumbled across the combination of characters or phrases to unlock the expression of emotions that run through my body just by looking into your eyes.

High and low you’re the only one I’ve found who understands the sickness deep inside, we hide from the rest of the world.

[poglluvnotes]

“Cracked”

Standing here cracked in half.

The missing pieces in ruins past.

But, you just laugh.

Lying behind the façade of white picket fences.

Money; the privilege you have to cover up your own mess.

Too bad we weren’t so blessed.

“Hey man want some more crack” is yelled while driving pass.

Everyone screams “Get a job”.

They don’t understand the search to find self worth.

There’s a devil inside that foolish pride.

Expecting to be treated as anything less than equal.

Wondering why our kids don’t have the same chances your did.

Learning how to paint their faces with acceptable lies.

Oh, that devil inside.

The government; “We the PEOPLE” ain’t failing us.

WE-THE-PEOPLE are failing ourselves.

Placing priorities on things before our fellow man.

NOT, what our country was founded on way back then.

Oh, that devil inside our heads.

Don’t look surprised, you help generate it everyday you walk by and decide to look the other way with your Starbucks and Supersized fries.

Wish we could all just look the other way, so our problems would just go away.

Oh, that devil inside all of us.

I see now there’s nothing left to love, nothing left to do.

Because you walk away, I’ll always be less than human in society’s eye’s.

They all sing “one love”, but I don’t see none.

And remember this my friends, one day this will be done. One day I will be blessed too, but even then I still won’t choose to treat my fellow man as cruel as you.

[poglluvnotes]

                                               “Replacing You”

Using my addiction to her satisfaction, the connection calls me up again.

The scent of seduction dripping from the words of her wine-stained lips on the other end of the line. Giving rise to the anticipation of intoxication drawing closer with every breath we take. Got me on my knees, begging for forgiveness knowing full well I’ve done nothing wrong.

She knows I’m just and addict, but high-waisted things is how she gets her kix. Memories at the tip of my tongue only driving the demons inside of me my head. 

A whisper from the other side sends the words “I know you missed it” running through my brain. “How much?” the sickness inside of me manages to ask; overcoming common sense. “A small price to pay, it will only cost you your life this time.” I quickly agree and ask to meet me.

A knock at the door makes my stomach turn and twist, cracking it open her slender finger pushes through offering a taste of a pure fix from her finger tip. Instantly my lips go numb and excitement hits the back of my throat. I stutter through the instant confusion “come in, please sit-down” as I regain my composure.

Watching, waiting for her to ease the pain life has dealt, no matter how hard we try we know that twelve steps is never gonna fix the sin the devil blessed us with - we were born like this.

Soon laid out before me are two of the finest baby powder lines these eyes have ever seen. The temptation already stirring fantasies. A quick whiff and the insanity hits my brain, slowly working ecstasy down the back of my throat.

It’s at this point the line blurs between pusher and addict and who’s feeding whose inner guilt. Soon both will be wrapped up in cotton, with the venom of her snake-bite poisoning my veins. 

[I was/am working on a poem that blurs the line of women and drugs, needs some polishing. But, I felt I had to write/post something on here today and this “scene” kind of “popped” out from the some of the notes. For instance “wrapped in cotton” could be bed sheets, or that little piece to keep the needle from hitting the spoon (wait that’s Lynyrd Skynyrd)].

[poglluvnotes]

The difference between a good love story and a great one is that a great one has something more; like me cooking you breakfast while your still half asleep.

[poglluvnotes]

You pulled me into your black cloud of twisted logic and altered sensibilities again. And I kind of like it.